The Notorious Misadventures of an Alchemist and a Phoenix, Chapter 27
Noah found himself in a cold dark room filled with criminals. He was surrounded by metal bars of the finest pig steel. Noah wasn't worried, he had been here before. Jail was a walk in the park compared to prison.
Noah was thankful to find he still had his clothes on and there were worse places to find yourself than the city watch's custody. They were pretty decent at their job. He guessed that he was here because of the "Rage" skill
Placing his face to the bars, Noah tried looking left, then right to find the guard. Nothing was there. Instead, he noticed the holding cell opposite his. It was just as big as the one he was in but everyone was huddled to one end trying to make themselves as small as possible, on the other side was a lump of blankets covering a single person. The other poor souls had lost their blankets to this one being.
"What an asshole," thought Noah
Noah had to wait. Guards weren't known for their patience and they definitely didn't like taking orders from their prisoners. He sat down between two large and heavily tattooed........females, Noah wasn't sure but it was the only seat available and he wasn't going to sit on the cold stone floor.
The two ladies shuffled their shoulders and grumbled a little but that was all. Noah checked his pockets to find nothing there, the guards probably took everything. This felt strange, Noah would fill his time with work and when there was nothing to do he felt empty.
"I know you" explained a voice "you're that kid that works in the Alchemy Bank. uh, uh, uh, Micheal"
Noah rolled his eyes, the voice couldn't even get his name correct which meant he didn't know Noah at all, the voice had most likely seen him come and go but that was it.
A young man, barely out of his teens, saunter his way toward Noah making small detours to avoid the older roommates and sat directly in front of Noah on the cold hard floor.
"How do you get a job in the Alchemy Bank," asked the young lad as he held his cheeks in cupped hands.
The goddamn kid was using a skill on Noah, he could feel it working on his mind. A Charm skill of some sort. No wonder the kid was in jail, all kinds of nasty things could happen when someone found out their mind was being messed with.
Noah looked down at the kid who was now trying his best to pull the cutest face he could make.
"You become useful" Noah answered the question the kid asked
"How do you make yourself useful," asked the kid.
Again Noah felt the tell-tale sign of a skill probing his mind, only his stats in wisdom was protecting Noah.
Noah was becoming annoyed by the questions coming from a kid who didn't even know his name. "a little bit of this, a little bit of that" answered Noah
"And what is that," asked the kid while one of his eyes twitched
Noah had enough "That's none of your bee's wax" he turned away
A soft huff escaped the kid's lips.
"KEEP IT DOWN" yelled a familiar voice
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Noah jumped to his feet and pushed his whole body against the bars of the jail.
"Phoenix, is that you," asked Noah
The mass of blankets moved and out popped the head of a featherless phoenix.
"Ewww gross," said Noah
The phoenix battled his way out of the sheets and hopped over to the bars. Noah hadn't seen the phoenix in his birthday suit for some time and he had forgotten just how ugly birds without feathers were.
"What are you in for," both Noah and phoenix said at the same time
Before either party could answer, a guard called them and stuffed the kid, the phoenix and Noah into a room. While in this room, the nosey kid kept asking questions and the phoenix tugged on Noah's clothes trying to get a piece for himself.
Noah was trying to defend himself from two attacks when a barrage of people marched in and sat down
"Sit down," said an angry-looking captain
Noah did as he was told despite the fact the phoenix was still tugging his clothes off. He recognised the guild master of the thieves guild as well as the redhead woman enforcer from the casino and even Margo was there.
"This is a mediation with arbiter Cex" the captain pointed at the kid whole shimmered on the spot and was replaced by an old man with the longest white eyebrows Noah had ever seen.
"Mediation...isn't that just a fancy word for arguing?" squawked the phoenix
Noah was losing the fight for his jacket and instead of fighting a losing battle, he gave up on the piece of clothing causing the phoenix to chirp with glee.
Arbiter Cex tugged on his eyebrows, he had heard about the phoenix. Of all the different mediation work he had done, Cex understood that the phoenix was possibly the greatest shit stirrer on this side of the travelling star belt.
"This mess with the casino and the broken rules and laws of the thieves guild has caused a chain reaction of bad business and lost profit and taxes" Cex explained "reparations need to be made, I will be the mediator in this"
"What makes you qualified to judge me" demanded the phoenix.
"The shit stirrer was hard at work," thought Cex
"We will see if I'm qualified," said Cex. He pointed at enforcer Bella first "Tell me your side first"
A grand story revealed itself of the phoenix robbing and damaging the casino and why the Alchemy Bank was responsible, all because the phoenix was a familiar.
Noah's intelligence and wisdom grabbed onto some keywords and he argued back
"What evidence do you have that your casino was attacked by this phoenix," asked Noah
"That's a good point" Cex agreed.
"How many bold phoenixes are there" explained Bella
"That's not an answer, it's a question that you should have had an answer to before you attacked the Alchemy Bank" replied Noah
"YEAAAA, when I took my feathers back, how did you know it was me" Noah wished he had the strength to knock the beak off the phoenix for the answer he just gave.
"You see, the bird admitted it, and the bird belongs to Margo Mordecai. We were within our rights to claim damages according to the rules of the thieves guild on an unsanctioned raid against a thieves guild protected business," shouted Bella
The thieves guild master also nodded his head in agreement.
Noah thought for a second, he played the possible answer to the next statement in his mind.
"What if I was to say that the phoenix belongs to me," Noah said slowly as if to weigh the question one word at a time.
"Then you would be responsible" answered Arbiter Cex
"So, I would have to pay reparations," asked Noah.
Turan, the thieves guild leader, Bella the enforcer and Arbiter Cex all said as one "YES"
"The phoenix does belong to me, he is my familiar" admitted Noah
"According to stolen property, damages and injury to staff, the reparation should be....." Arbiter Cex was doing some light math.
Noah interrupted Cex's math by adding some complications "The phoenix is my property and can't be given credit or even allowed to gamble without my expressed permission. There are rules and laws that stop familiars from being stolen and that includes byproducts such as feathers. When the Casino took my feathers they were handling stolen property."
Cex flipped some papers over and nodded his head "true, but you are still responsible for the damage the phoenix did to the casino"
"And what of the damage done to the Alchemy Bank by the request of enforcer Bella and the thieves guild master Turan"
"We acted on bad faith and even worst information" spoke Turan
"It's not my fault that you don't know your own member's information" Bella almost screamed at Turan.
"So, the Alchemy Bank isn't at fault, when do I get my reparations," asked Margo
"What are you talking about you old fart, you don't get anything.." the phoenix's mouth was quickly covered up by Noah with the sleeves of the jacket the phoenix was wearing.
Thankfully no one heard it, or perhaps they ignored it because it came from the phoenix. The whole room was yelling at each other trying to pass the blame to each other.
Arbiter Cex slumped on his chair, he thought to himself "What a cluster slug of a moment"