“...and by ‘a long time ago’, I mean about 30 years. But that’s, like, TWO or THREE squirrel lives! I was not alive for this, people!!”
“Yeah, I don’t think any of us were,” interrupted Mushpuff.
“Well--” Plagiarize began.
“STOP INTERRUPTING!!” shouted the squirrel. “DO YOU WANT THIS STORY OR NOT???”
“Continue,” said Mushpuff.
“WELL, AS I WAS SAYING, it all started about thirty years ago. There used to be this well-known wizard, and he went by the name of The Corn Wizard.”
“Who in their right mind would name their child The Corn Wizard??” asked Klumpkrump. “That’s messed up.”
“I would!” said Snorter.
“IT’S A FAKE NAME, YOU IDIOT!!” yelled the squirrel at the top of his lungs. “HIS NAME WASN’T ACTUALLY The Corn Wizard!! That’s just what he CALLED HIMSELF!! Now STOP INTERRUPTING ME!!! So--”
“Okay,” interrupted Plagiarize. “No more interruptions.” The squirrel shot him a look and continued.
“Okay, so this guy, The Corn Wizard. He grew really popular because he discovered and mastered the art of Corn Magic and he used it to feed tons of starving people. But then all these charity organizations who made all their money by feeding starving people got really angry since they couldn’t make money anymore due to the fact that all the STARVING PEOPLE were now being fed CORN!!! So they organized an assassination on The Corn Wizard. He died, a lot of really complicated stuff happened afterwards, a lot of people went to jail, blah, blah, blah, BLAH!!! Then a big tomb was made for him because everyone loved him - well, except for the people who assassinated him - and all of his treasures and stuff were put inside of it. It was inspired by the tomb of some other guy which was built thousands of years prior on the same planet, which was a pyramid. So The Corn Wizard’s tomb was also a pyramid.”
The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
“Wait--” interjected Plagiarize.
“SHUT UP! So The Corn Wizard’s tomb was a pyramid, and as you can probably guess, it’s the one we’re standing on now. And the reason for that is that it was stolen by some space pirate guys and nobody had seen it since. Until now. Because we’re STANDING ON IT!!”
“So why is it floating, and why is it here?” asked Bird.
“I DON’T KNOW!!” yelled the rodent. “YOU THINK I KNOW EVERYTHING???”
“Squirrel, I have a question!” splorforgorated Plagiarize.
“WHAT IS IT???”
“Did this all happen on the planet Earth?”
“YES!!” replied the squirrel. “How did you know that??”
“That’s where I’m from.”
“And why is that important??”
“It’s not.”
“So STOP TELLING ME USELESS INFORMATION!!” shouted the squirrel.
“Wait, so where does the part about the shield come in?” asked Klumpkrump.
“RIGHT! The SHIELD!! Well, seeing as it’s such an important tomb, I don’t see why it wouldn’t have a shield.”
“It certainly isn’t a typical energy shield,” said Snorter. “Those can be easily pierced by Energy Cube beams.”
“Mmmm, yez, and the shield isn’t gricklite either, no?” noted Qaeron, speaking for the first time in 22 chapters (whoops). “Those shields are green, yez.”
“So then what the heck is this thing, yo??” asked Bird.
“Maybe it’s a corn shield,” Plagiarize suggested. “It’s yellow, and corn is famously known for its yellow color.”
“My god, Plagiarize, I think you’ve cracked the case!” said Klumpkrump. “It’s a corn shield!”