第八回：酒后散发开阔心肠，你可识得此画戟乎
Madi-san's words rang out like a sudden thunderbolt in the room.
"I said what I said! I want to kill a dragon!"
Judging by the『You Wa Shockku』 moment our host is having now, I don't think that it is something you should say out loud! What are we supposed to do in a situation like this, Madi-san?! Curtsey, bow, genuflect, dogeza...?!
"What's all this about killing a dragon...?" Neko-chan folds her arms, not understanding one bit either.
"Foolishness, Neko-chan, foolishness! A heroine ALWAYS ends up slaying a dragon after three tasks!" I am desperately trying to pull Madi-san down from her high chair, but she is not budging one inch! "Do you guys not into Gxxshxn? Don't tell me you ACTUALLY got psyopped and dropped it at Sumxxu before the PLOT got GOOD?!"
"Dragons..."
Through trembling fingers,【taisho】regains some momentary composure.
"... if I told you that the ryuu were the pillars of power in this land..."
"Good! I'll be taking its soul, then! Gonna say I won't accept anything less than spitting fireballs as my shouto!"
"Oi, [Exposer], what are you up to now...?"
Madi-san, you idiot! Daju is trying to TELL you that we SHOULDN'T be trying to beatdown a dragon! Instead, you're here fantasizing about eating its soul and learning to do a 『Katon』[1] out of the deal too?! This is what no listening comprehension does to the Fxxxxh! Taking out a dragon probably means that you are taking out one of the foundational beings of this world!
"If its just power you seek, there are better and easier【Dao】." Looking over to the orange cat sitting across from Madi-san, her initial trembling has been replaced with an emotional quivering, like that of a clear spring of water bursting out of a deep cavern for the first time in a very long while. She probably has guessed that Madi-san doesn't do stuff for the power already. One, Madi-san is already ridiculously 'OP', as she so shamelessly proclaims; and two...
"That's right! You think I do this for the POW?! Ehehehe!!! Tell em', Neko-chan!"
"My【taisho】, it may seem unbelievable, but the only thing that motivates this madwoman is lulz."
"Cousin, I have never heard of a【Dao of Laoloz】..."
"(whispers) Just think of it as an impure desire to laugh at the world, regardless of consequences..."
"I can hear you from here, Neko-chan!!" Madi-san crosses her arms and plops herself down on a chair, satisfied that her life's philosophy has been properly explained by her arch-nemesis (former). "Just so that you know, we don't take backbiting up in this biichii!!"
"An impure desire... to laugh at the world...?"
The orange neko-tachi's face is reflected in the new cup of tea poured by Neko-chan. She hides the bottom of her face with a hand, as if she had remembered something, or someone very important. Even so, she cannot hide her thin orange tail from excitedly swaying behind her, betraying her childlike anticipation at taking in this breath of fresh air so different from the stale, stagnant air of the 【Three Kingdoms】.
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"Cousin, please retire early tonight. I wish to walk with our new friends to the [Weapons Room]."
Neko-chan clasps her oversized, straight-edged 『nodachi-like』weapon in her both hands before her, pulling lightly at my sleeve in a half-whisper, "You'll keep the [Exposer] out of trouble tonight, won't you?"
Ahahaha... That I can't guarantee, Madi-san will simply do as she does, but I'll do my best anyways!
Having secured this half-guarantee from me, Neko-chan looks satisfied and leaves from the other stairway, Madi-san blowing a raspberry from behind her.
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Descending our own stairway, Daju opens a wooden sliding door to the streets outside.
"Please, after you, big heroes."
In the moonless light, we walk down the long central vein that makes up the middle of this city. Much like the magistrate-town we found ourselves in at the start of our adventure, simple, low-roofed housing made of clay and thatched roofs are organized in orderly squared streets. Every few hundred meters, the streets are lit up with round paper lanterns which hang on sticks outside of each doorway. The only difference is that it seems some effort has been made to clean the sooty walls; small brushes of greenery occasionally peep out of the housing backyards, but not by much. Debris and rubble tell the tale of a city recently besieged; no collapsed buildings, but there is a damaged roof here and there.
Since it is already deep in the night, there aren't many people walking about when the three of us make our way down the cracked, paved, road in dire need of maintenance.
"Now, let's have an honest talk."
Daju pulls out the needle that holds up the curly side-coiffure that gives her a few extra chi of height and stately elegance. Falling behind her in a curly perm, it just barely reaches the small of her back. I cannot help but remark how much she looks like Neko-chan when her hair is done this way. Twirling the porcelain needle around, she slides it into a dark thigh strap like an excessively large murder weapon.
Huh.
Where have I seen this before...
Before I could continue thinking along these lines, Daju opens up,
"I too, am looking for a ryuu."
"Then where are they?! Have you found any...? Mark it on the map, nao!" Madi-san's excitement goes through the roof at the prospect of being able to punch a lizard in the face in cinematic killcam mode.
"... but before that, I am a merchant." Daju waves and smiles at a passing street NPC who had just stopped and salute her with both hands clasped. Continuing on, Daju speaks to both of us.
"... as you can see, this city isn't doing too well. We are in no condition to fight what do you [Hereticates] call ryuu... dragoons?"
"Dragon."
"Yes, dragons it is, sister Ayano! Dragon! Dragon! Dragon! Gishishishishi!" Daju laughs and relishes learning a small fragment of [Vespanol], the tongue of the world we come from. "You have my support, and thus the support of this city, but..."
"... its always a fetch-quest with you gold-rubbing types, ehehehe!!"
That one felt slightly rude, but Daju seems to not mind in the least, laughing along with Madi-san as I jab her in the ribs with an angled elbow to avoid offending our host. Having recovered from throwing her head back with both hands around the small of her stomach, Daju points at Madi-san,
"You are very direct, sister Delaroux! I have been working as a 【taisho】for far too long... I have forgotten this...!"
If someone has to inject a voice of sanity into this conversation, it has to be me. "Madi-san, you can't possibly be thinking of soloing a dragon by yourself, right? Even if we ARE going to fight against a dragon, we'll need help, logistics, and plan at least...?"
"Nah, I'd win, by myself!"
"Hey, would you listen carefully, Madi-san?! I am saying that if we trade a bit of our time helping the city, Daju will help us with intelligence, right?"
"Not just information, I can also loan you weapons and [Non-Personages]."
"Wait, they are actually called NPCs in this world?", Madi-san, who had been happily skipping in front suddenly screeches to a halt, turning her head around as the camera quickly zooms in on her surprised pixxxhu face, eyebrow raised like the hump of a small pebble.
"I thought you knew that already, sister Delaroux..."
"Of... of course I did, Madison is always right after all...!"
No, you didn't! You totally didn't! Don't lie to the 【taisho】, you Fxxxxh woman!
Stopping in front of a wooden building with large imposing bronze doors, this must be the [Weapons Room] Daju was talking about earlier. Wrapped around the door handles designed to resemble a pair of polished tortoise shells are heavy grey chains that end in a padlock the size of my head.
"Oh dear, I forgot to ask for the key from Cousin."
"Ah, that's truly unfortunate, maybe we should come tomorrow?"
"There's no need, we'll just go with a direct approach."
Daju unlatches the long porcelain needle off her thigh strap, swiftly inserting it into the exaggeratedly sturdy lock. Putting the side of her head against the door, orange cat-ear on the lock, she masterfully holds it in one hand while twisting the needle with the other.
Left, three.
Five to the right.
A small imperceptible click neither me nor Madi-san could hear must have given Daju a hint, since her ears are now poised in alert attention.
Sixteen, it is.
With a resolute twist of the needle, the lock gives way, with the rest of the chains falling clatteringly to the ground. Madi-san is clapping furiously while laughing in joy at this show of locksmithing.
"Please don't be impressed, any [Master-Class] can do this much with their hands." Pushing past the bronze doors and stepping past the door separator at our feet, we make our way into the darkness of the [Weapons Room].
"A long, long, time ago, this city played host to a great-general."
Using her needle as a flint, a torch at the entrance crackles to life, which somehow lights up the rest of the torches that illuminate the room. Arrayed on the four walls are a selection of well-kept weapons; fans, swords, knives, shields, spears; no katanas though, which is a shame.
"Though the great warrior's legend has long faded, this city still remembers. She taps the glass of an upright container in the center of this room, which hosts a long-handled halberd adorned with a red tassel. The sides of this spear-like weapon are curved like opposing crescent moons. Its mighty form silently told stories of thousands slain with a single swing of its tip, the weapon of a true warrior.
"In the spirit of that great warrior, I'll loan you anything in this room, but you two must help me do one thing."
"Ah... What could it be, Daju?"
"I need you to kill a cultivator for me."
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NEXT: Neko-chan's Plans Are Meticulous Her Formations Are Perfect, Screw That I Say We Charge Right Into The Camp!
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Go Go And Learn Moonrunes With Aya-chan!
[1]『Katon』- Flame technique. Usually used by ninjas. Don't ask how I know. I am NOT a ninja!