Chapter 182

Freebooter Goblin

Slime-tooth

There were no sharks, no manta rays, no jellyfish; and there was no sandy bottom and no light. It was dark, but I could breathe. It felt as though the depth of the sea rocked me in its peaceful ebb.

As if surfacing from the bottom of the sea, I woke up. I crushed my eyelids together, but bright light seeped through. My ears perked where their muscles still worked. The ship was rolling, and from the lack of speed, we must have anchored. Was Gloom-glower coming?

Oh no! Collect the ptooey! Move your body, old goblin! Lift the barrels. Lift them now! Get under them, hoist and scream and heave. Wake yourself up. Tell yourself the story you liked. Gloom-glower can’t see you sleeping. Work! More!

“Slime-tooth, can you hear?” said a raspy voice. “Can you hear—”

That was a voice I recognized! Barnacle-eyes! She was looking for me! The ships were sinking. The mutiny was in full swing. Goblins were screaming, and my like-a-daughter was looking for me! I was looking for her too, as fast as my twisted ankle would let me. My precious goblin! Where are you?

Letting the light into my eyes was liking letting someone poke them with a crusty butterknife. It made them water, and I had to blink two dozen times.

I saw the colors of the deckhouse. I was in Barnacle-eyes’ sloop. The mutiny was behind me. Barnacle-eyes put her arm around. She asked again if I could hear her. What was so urgent? Did she need ptooey?

“I-I hear you, I hear you. There’s more ptooey on the way. Lots more—”

Barnacle-eyes hoisted me up with a fish-bear hug and a tongue-squeezing grunt. “Slime-tooth, c’mon! Can you hear the goblins? They’re goblin-ing for you!”

I wobbled on my feet, but Barnacle-eyes stood with me like she was a sturdy orc. What muscle she must have developed. She steadied me as I swayed, and she fixed a kink in one of my ears. That ear picked up a sudden deep air, and I heard a commotion outside.

Oh, but I had to sit back down.

“Up, up!” said Barnacle-eyes. “Gotta get moving!”

She hoisted me up to my feet. Everything usually hurt. It was usually so bad. Things had been hurting so bad for so long, but today was different. I didn’t feel the pain as much. My body wasn’t listening to me anymore. Thank the goblins for Barnacle-eyes. If she weren’t here to help lead me…

“Barnacle-eyes,” I said. “When a goblin takes the lead, they lead the next goblin after the leader, okay?”

With an arm over my shoulder, she let me lean on her as she walked me out on deck. We went to the starboard taffrail that overlooked her favorite city to visit. The pier was filled with goblins! They were shouting my name! They called for Barnacle-eyes. Half of them had bottles of goblin spit beer in their raised hands. They cheered when they saw us. And—by the goblins!—there were humans too, and they had bottles of Goblin Spuck! Some of the humans were pointing at me, and they looked as excited as a goblin with cheese fumes under their nose. They had open books, and when I squinted, I saw pictures of goblin spit beer and Goblin Spuck beer.

“I gotta show you Green-fin,” said Barnacle-eyes. “It’s one of my favorite places. We got some time before Erik the skull man comes to get us.”

“By the goblins,” I said. “Humans drinking spit beer? How come they’re saying my name?”

“Easy! Cause you’re famous! Humans and monsters have heard of you all over the world now! Now c'mon, lazybones! Green-fin is right there, Let’s go!”

I couldn’t turn with Barnacle-eyes, and I fell. I didn’t feel the fall, but all I could suddenly see was the floorboards where sea salt made squares between the boards. Strong and gentle hands gripped my arms and pulled.

“I’m sorry, Barnacle-eyes. Maybe later. Maybe if I take another nap first.”

“Who knows when I’ll be able to wake you up again.”

“I’ll make it a fast nap. I’ll sleep in my sleep. Then I’ll sleep in that sleep. And then in the one after that.”

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“But all you’ve done is sleep. All the way here.”

She hefted me to my feet once more. I did my best to help her. “I can’t,” I said. “I just can’t right now. I’m too tired.”

“Slime-tooth, I really want to share this with you.”

She hopped in front of me, squatted. and pulled me onto her back.

“I gotcha!” she said. “You just sit back and relax.”

“Whoa!”

“There we go!”

With a couple of hops, she made me as comfortable as I could be. I tried to wrap my arms around her neck, but it was using too much of my strength, so I let them dangle over her shoulders. I laid my chin between her neck and shoulder.

With sure stomps, she carried me down the gangway and through the throng of goblins. They were gloriously loud! Were they all her friends? They were so nice to her; oh, how wonderful!

“Hello, hello, hello!” she told the goblins.

And the goblins appeared through the crowd to talk to her, one after the other.

“Welcome back, Admiral!” said a goblin.

“Bring any spit beer?” said another. “Goblin Spuck’s fine too!”

“I missed you!”

“I missed the hiring last time. Can I be part of your crew?”

Goblins pushed each other for the space to talk to her.

“Me, me, me! I wanna get hired, too!” said a rather well fed goblin.

They wanted to work for her? Nobody ever wanted to work for Gloom-glower! Oh, what a sugar-thing to see! Most remarkable was how Barnacle-eyes gave every goblin a hello and a this and that. After losing her impressive fleet and almost all of her crew, how was her spirit not hampered? With quite little left, she was still the kind goblin I’ve always looked up to.

I didn’t know any of the goblins! My heart felt like it was green, like a plant—like something that grows when it's watered and given sunlight. Oh, how I wanted to say hello too! Ah, but it was much too hard to muster the strength to talk. Ha! What did that matter? All the goblins were smiling and laughing and following the leader up the dock.

“There’s a farm-a-market on the pier sometimes,” said Barnacle-eyes, turning her head to me as much as she could. “It's on a this-day and a that-day during the this-season and the that-season. It comes and goes like magic. Over there is where the painter humans painted my ships when they used to have great big gigantic jungles on them. Up there is the laven-stitch city where all the humans walk around. If you go up that street and do some lefts and rights, there’s tons of boot shops, but they sell out a lot. Promotion boots are terribly hard to find here. Oh, and I have a Smith butler! Did I tell you that already? Anyways, he’s gotta meet you.”

After a long and big blink, I made out a beautiful building. It was breathtaking. Huge stacked boards were each a different color of wood. I could make out ship parts that were used in the construction.

“What’s this place?” I said as barnacle-eyes brought us closer to it.

“That’s Green-fin.”

With a big kick in the middle of the double doors, Barnacle-eyes burst into Green-fin. I felt like I was sailing on a sea of goblins. Their voices fell to a crashing surf of whispers as we entered. The whispers soon grew into shouts and hollers and hoots and calls. But as he squeezed our way through, I saw many worried gazes, and I heard the hush of many whispers.

“Is that a goblin?” some goblin said. “There’s too many scars to tell.”

“Yeah, and there’s a lot of parts missing, too,” said another.

“How come his skin’s so grey? I’ve never seen a goblin that grey before.”

“Slime-tooth, you wanna meet everybody?” said Barnacle-eyes. “You haven’t said a single hello so far.”

With great strength, I said, “Could you…” My voice went hoarse.

Barnacle-eyes spun a circle. “Huh? Who said that?”

Because my arms were too heavy, I tapped my Barnacle-eyes on the shoulder with my nose. I prepared myself with a hefty breath. “Back here, Barnacle-eyes. Could you say the hellos for me?”

“Phew, you didn’t sound like you just now!”

“Please, I’m too tired to talk.”

“You can count on me, sleepyhead!”

A yellow-green finger poked my cheek. “Um, who you got there?” said a yellow-green goblin.

“Slime-tooth, the best goblin I ever met,” said Barnacle-eyes. “He says hello.”

Several goblins gasped. “Wha…what happened to him?” said a goblin.

“Gloom-glower happened to him. Hello, Click-claws! And hello from Slime-tooth.”

Hellos were flung back and forth as we went. There were so many faces that I wish I knew the names of. I would have settled with just remembering their shapes and features. I smiled as much as I could until smiling drained me of energy. I hoped my eyes were smiling for me.

What a dream come true. Everyone was being so nice. My prayers were answered. All I ever wanted was for Barnacle-eyes to be accepted and well treated. Having such a dream come true relaxed mer all the way from my nose to my toes to my heart.

My eyelids fell over my eyes. I wanted to tell Barnacle-eyes that I needed to sleep for just a moment, but I just didn’t have the strength. At least I could hear everyone. There were hellos here, hellos there; and some hellos from way up.

There were so many hellos that they started to mush together. They mixed with whispers and laughs and chortles and guffaws and giggles and shouts; and all the sounds of goblins began to sound like the sea crashing against a shore.

The sounds of goblins crashed all around me. They reminded me of the sea crashing against the hull of a ship. What a comforting sound for a freebooter goblin.

The sound was calling me. The big blue sea was calling me. I could hear so definitely that it was like I could see it clearly in my mind. The sea that I saw was a magic sea. There were goblins in the water, goblins on the waves, goblins in the sky, and goblins in the stars. The sea was very dark and very deep and very quiet and very peaceful and very dark and…