DRIFTING AWAY IN TO A PAINFUL OCEAN
Hands wrapped around my throat squeezing like a vice the feeling of fear, pain and helplessness on the golden sandy beach by the red sea. I'm being strangled by Shinji I know this is a dream I've had it over and over but the fear has never gone. I don't know if its fear of the unknown but all I get from it is Déjà vu' and I know its not because the dream repeats in my mind, no it's the feeling that I've been here before for real even though I know this has never happened.
The only changing factor is in my dream I'm so much younger and he's younger and then I remember this is why I walked away from this relationship all those years ago because I realized that I only brought him pain and misery. I bullied him abused him made him some kind of sex toy for my personal benefit.
He deserved none of it he's better than I am, he deserves to be loved. The strange thing now is in this dream I have the same bandages on my face and on my right arm it's really surreal. I know how the dream ends I put my hand on his face and I stroke it gently and he stops but he's broken he crying weeping on my chest. It's so depressing and I feel sick inside like I'm a monster and that I drove him to that but then it just gets worse because my younger self in the dream says the words how disgusting.
The irony is I'm verfickte disgusted at her she's not me we are not the same person! I will never be her again as long as I live I've hurt so many people just for being me and acting so awful, you don't break others to make yourself but I didn't know that in my youth and I realized it in my late teens when it was just to late for it to make any difference. It's the reason I stay away from people because I just hurt them when ever I get close. I hate this dream so much but at the same time I'm glad it repeats because it reminds me who I shouldn't be and how I shouldn't act and that my actions have terrible consequences.
Shinji is not a violent man he has never laid a finger on me so what ever I did that brought him to this must have been beyond awful. Asuka looked down realizing that she was suddenly away from her dream looking down on her younger self and Shinji from afar in her older body as the dark voice spoke behind her. "Pity such a nice boy shame you broke him."
She turned seeing the dark body and red eyes of Bardiel. "You again!?" Bardiel large mouth formed a sneer as he walked around on all fours almost like an animal but not because the body had a party human element to it so. It was in between like some kind of lycanthrope but with huge long whip lash tail while there were waves of black followed his feet. "Seems you hate yourself a lot…"
Asuka tensed realizing that in this dream she could see with both her eyes not just one. "I'm starting to really hate you more." Bardiel's shark toothed jaws formed a smile. "No what you hate more than me is knowing that you're a monumental screw up and no one will ever really love you on that personal emotional level that you crave. Because your damaged goods and you mess up everything you touch." Asuka breathed in painfully realizing that her dream was now frozen apart from them she turned as he spoke again. "It must be such a strain to have that kind of sexual energy inside you and have no release." Asuka sneered as she met his red glowing eyes. "I do have release and how I get it is none of your verfickte concern."
She watched as Bardiel laughed it was an ugly grating laugh like someone scratching a chalk board before he spoke again. "I'm surprised your RV helmet isn't broken, I will never personally understand humans and there obsessions with sex. It rules you like some false deity, not enough and you're worthless, too much and it gets messy for who ever are involved, if hearts are attached and it's not casual." He ran a clawed finger through the sands. "Well in your case at least I could count the numbers of men, women you broke once up on a time but it would be pointless because you're not a hot headed male, its not like you ever kept a score count to brag about." He walked slowly around her. "By far the worst part about your youth was in the beginning as you blamed others for your sexual desires, because in that mind of yours sex was such a big part of you, you wanting to grow up but you were ashamed even though you live in a world were women are no longer ashamed for having sexual desires and can have many sexual partners freely."
He looked up his red eyes flashing. "But that was your step parents fault wasn't it? They told you off and the other girl you lived with that having desire was shameful and disgusting and that you should act a certain way or you won't get a partner or children while pushing out of touch backwards gender roles onto you." He sat down on his hind legs. "Boys play ball, girls wear dresses outdated gender spectrums no wonder you and that other girl so often spoke about running away together so you could be someone else and have your own lives but only you got to run away because fate allowed it." He raised one of his clawed hands. "And now here we are talking about your pathetic existence."
Asuka felt her teeth grind together. "My existence is not pathetic!" Bardiel leaned closer. "What have you ever achieved outside being a pilot? Also when I say this take in to account that I'm not talking about all those hobbies you do which are to better your self outside the Evangelion like fighting men and women bigger than yourself in the gym."
He watched as she looked away. "That's right you can't answer because you have nothing beyond being a pilot and the world wouldn't even miss you if you vanished, because you've never really touched anyone in a way that they'd even care." He eased up a clawed finger as he stood up moving forward so he was towering over on his clawed hind legs. "Those you used have no happy memories of you because you gave them no happiness to treasure and those who know you on a personal level don't even know you as a person anymore and they'd just rather you weren't here because you're a problem and a burden and they hate you." He eased up a long clawed finger. "But do not despair, you will always have me, you just need to let me in, I can make it all go away." His smile widened. "With the right motivation you can be more than this pathetic flesh and bone form."
His clawed finger shot out slamming straight in to her left eye he pushed it in ignoring her intense screaming as red blood ran down her face dripping on to the golden sand at her feet while her small hands grabbed his finger trying to pry it out. "You just need to find that sweet spot between agony and ecstasy."
Maya stood up as she heard the screaming which was loud enough to echo down the hall, she left her desk not stopping as ran in to Asuka hospital room as the other staff ran in. Asuka's only good hand was clutching her bandaged eye as the rest of her body shook violently, the heart monitor was also going crazy while her other blood shot blue eye shot around wide awake. She grabbed the medication gun knowing this was not going to easy. "Hold her down now stop her moving or she's going to break her bones!" She watched as the men and women grabbed every possible limb they could. She moved over to the red haired woman who was in such pain much, she'd seen Asuka in pain many times but not like this, this was different because she looked absolutely terrified.
"Asuka I'm going to give you a painkiller, followed by a sedative okay." The blue eye moved and her mouth moved but whatever the words were they never came out she could only take them as a yes she pushed in the medical gun firing it watching as the violently fit like shaking stopped. She pressed the gun watching as it reloaded a sedative she pressed it against her throat before firing the switch. The single blue eye suddenly stopped moving erratically as it went to centre as the pupil dilated becoming large as both drugs kicked in and the eye slowly closed as everything became still she breathed in deeply as everyone let go and the covers were put over the young woman who lay still.
She leaned closer watching as thin red trickle of blood ran out from under the bandaged eye as Asuka's left arm fell flat. "Okay can someone change the eye bandage she's bleeding again?" She watched as they began to work. "What happened here, was anyone in the room?" the man close to her who was called Jiro shook his head. "We didn't do anything she was sound asleep, I was passing by the room and she just snapped awake screaming it scared the hell out of me."
Maya looked at Asuka as they took off her eye bandage seeing that the blood stain had come not from the long thin scar which went straight through her eye but from her tear duck which was very strange, it wasn't an open wound at all she'd literally cried blood. She leaned over very carefully opening the damaged eye whose white had turned to blood red from the trauma force it was far to early to tell if she'd lost her sight as the eye needed to heal fully, as for the scar that would be a permanent feature for the rest of this woman's life. "Can someone check her hormone level because she might have developed haemolacria." The woman closest whose name was Ara spoke. "I'll do that right away." She looked at Asuka's bandaged body if she could just remain still for one more night it would be enough that the fast acting drugs could heal the last of her broken bones.
8
Shinji ran up the hospital corridor watching as Rei followed they'd just gotten the news that Asuka had, had some sort of fit last night and had been violently sick all morning though her grandmother would be coming up this afternoon he and Rei wanted to see her first. He stopped seeing that she was sitting up in bed with her head over a sick bowl, the powerful drugs that healed bones had fixed her right arm at least as she had it by the side of her face and her fingers were moving. Her legs had been lowered but she wasn't moving them and they'd given her white hospital trousers and a top to wear rather than a dress her left eye had also been re bandaged.
She didn't look right at all she looked pale and tired he watched as Maya walked up to him the concern in her eyes as she stopped in front of them both. "We heard she had a bad night." Maya looked up sadly. "That would be putting it mildly, she woke up screaming in the middle of the night clutching her left eye and her body was in full spasm, I had to put her out or her leg bones would have never healed right."
She shook her head. "She can move her right arm now and fingers and her spine seem better as she can lean forward on her own but it hurts. Her legs are another issue all together there all healed but she still can't move them and her ribs are all completely healed which means she can breath better." She shook her head sadly. "She keeps on being sick though, we don't know what's causing it none of the medications we put her on are meant to cause this kind of thing nether is her food and she has not been eating anything she shouldn't I made sure of that because her lower gut is still in the process of healing." She breathed in deeply. "You're both going to have to be very gentle with her she's really weak and very out of sorts and do not be surprised if she's sick again we have given her something to stop her nausea but it's having no effect what so ever."
Rei looked up feeling her eyes dart. "What do you mean by out of sorts, I mean is it anger?" Maya shook her head. "No there's no anger whatsoever, she's just not fluid she keeps talking in German, I'm not even sure she knows what she's saying herself and I made sure not to overdose her on painkillers."
Shinji looked up. "We'll keep that in mind." He carefully opened the door allowing Rei through first, he watched as Asuka looked up her good eye darting as she spoke. "Oh look the welcome wagon…come to gloat over my broken body." Rei blinked okay that wasn't Japanese's that was in German and she literally had no idea what the older red haired woman had just said as the only thing she ever understood where Asuka's swear words.
She sat down opposite Shinji who put his hand on Asuka's good one. "Asuka it's us its Rei and Shinji, you recognise us right?" Asuka looked at them both for a long moment as if she was struggling to remember them her next words came out in perfect Japanese. "Didn't I screw one of you and come on to the other?" She suddenly laughed but it was a cold laugh. "The one I came on to slapped me so hard." Her face suddenly turned to pain almost misery. "That hurt…I know I deserved it but it still hurt." Shinji moved a little closer. "Yes we had a relationship but it was a long time ago, you ended it, do you remember?"
Asuka didn't look up her face remained pained and miserable. "Is my Mama here?" Rei eased up her hand stopping Shinji from speaking because she knew he would tell the truth but in Asuka's state of mind she wouldn't be able to handle it, as it seemed like she was drifting through her past memories. "No Asuka she's not here."
She stood up moving a little closer to her putting her hand very gently on her red hair which was soft to the touch. "Why do you ask for her?" Asuka looked up but not in to her eyes it was more like she was looking past her. "Because my sunflowers are dying my step parent's hate them they won't water them." She looked at her hands. "There like the sun light and they smell so nice." Shinji put his hands on his knees. "You have sun flowers Asuka there at your house."
Asuka eyed him but it was like she was looking through him. "I'm not old enough to own a house you idiot, I'm fifteen years old." Rei looked at her brother she turned back to Asuka she had not heard that word towards ether of them in so many years. Hearing it now felt so out of place it was like she was switching between memories and even her own age without even realizing it because when she had come on to her she'd been sixteen and when she separated with Shinji she'd been eighteen.
She kept her hand on her head stroking the red hair very gently. "Asuka." She watched as the red head turned to her again. "My name is Rei and this is Shinji we are your friends." Asuka looked at her for a long moment before speaking in a strange child like tone. "You're really beautiful and you have nice eyes there really soft and gentle." Her face seemed to become deeply conflicted and uneasy. "But if my step parents found out that I have these awful disgusting feelings they'd be so mad because you're only meant to like one gender and I like both I know if they found out it would be one more reason to hate me." Her face turned to utter sadness and deep despair. "I guess I'm always going to be broken goods, no ones ever going to want me my Mama didn't she killed herself by hanging herself from the rafters of her hospital room I walked in on her it was so horrible." She looked at her hand. "I was going to tell her about the Evangelion program that they had accepted me you see I thought she would recognise me…she never recognises me, she thinks the trashy doll is me."
The good blue eye was now showing real pain and almost tearing. "Do you think I'd made a good pilot? Its just I want people to like me, I just want to matter I don't want to be someone else's trash." Rei felt her heart twist in her chest that was probably the saddest thing she ever heard come out of Asuka's mouth. They had both asked her about her mother before but she'd always been really cagey about it and only said that she had committed suicide and left it at that.
Now she knew why in the past Asuka had, had issues with drinking it was because she had been drinking to forget the awful memories. She could see the sadness in Shinji eyes as she turned back to Asuka who was looking at her as if waiting for approval in such a child like way. She gave her, her best smile as she looked at her. "I think you would make a great pilot Asuka." Shinji stood up doing the same. "Yeah you'd be great." Asuka's good eye seemed to light up. "Do you think they'll let me wear red?" Rei felt her smile widen as she moved her hand away from her hair. "I'm sure they would."
Asuka gave her a smile but it faded as she put a hand on her stomach then grabbed the sick bowl throwing up violently. Her next words came out half heartedly as she put the bowl to one side. "I'm so tired and my left eye hurts so much." Rei moved slowly around the other side of the bed helping her lie back on the pillow. "Get some rest Asuka." Shinji helped his sister pull the cover over her. "You'll feel better." He carefully took out his Walkman putting it on her bedside table with her other gifts. "When you feel better you can play with my Walkman, it might keep you company."
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Asuka spoke although she seemed slightly more with it this time. "Which tracks are the best?" Shinji gave her a wide smile. "I like tracks, twenty five to twenty seven but track thirty has an odd base but maybe you will find more some tracks that suite you." Asuka didn't say anything as her good eyed closed and she seemed to just drift off. Shinji looked up at Rei speaking very quietly. "Did you see the way she looked at you?" Rei breathed in deeply. "There was nothing in it she didn't know who I was, or even who you were."
They both stepped away from the bed allowing space so Asuka could sleep. "She was just reliving her childhood memories, it's like some thing has just shook them out of order." Shinji looked down sadly. "I didn't know that was what happened to her mother, I mean I didn't know she died that way." Rei shook her head as she breathed in sadly. "It explains why whenever we brought it up in the past she got really cagey and really aggressive." She folded her arms. "Why didn't she tell us, we would have understood we lost our mother and our aunt?" She breathed in painful. "Also what she was saying about her sexuality was so sad as well I had no idea it was like that for her, she must have felt so awful about herself."
Shinji nodded calmly. "Plus it's an outdated attitude I knew about it when I was with her and I never thought of her as disgusting for liking both genders. No wonder she went so of the rails growing up, to have that kind of repression and then to have everything suddenly opened to you in your teens, it's a recipe for emotional heartache and pain."
8
Misato eyed Ritsuko in disgust from her work desk. "Tell me you're not seriously saying this to me!" Ritsuko folded her arms. "It's not up for debate it's an order from Gendo himself he wants a switch test below ground!" Misato raised her hand. "You want to test Mari in unit 02 please we have done this shit before it doesn't work! You swap the pilot over the Evangelion rejects them and goes crazy it's only on the training units it works but the newer units are just not built that way. It's the reason we have to have a lot more pilots because fighting a war with two or three would cause serious issues and make us weaker because we can't switch them around at the drop of a hat. The governments and UN agreed that after the disaster we had of putting Rei in to Kaworu's unit some years back that they would never repeat the scenario again because the pilots are just too precious."
She raised her finger as she stood up not caring as she got inside the blonde woman's personal place. "I will not see another pilot get put through the grinder, Rei was very badly wounded in that incident and it really terrified her, she practically slept in my room for three days and cried her eyes out, because it scared her that much. She said she saw things she didn't want to see and that she felt like that unit 03 was purposely trying to hurt her and rejected her." Ritsuko felt a sneer form on her lips. "Mari is made of much stronger stuff than Rei, she can handle it!"
Shigeru looked over from where he'd been standing. "Your confusing arrogance and delusion with courage and honour they are not the same thing." Ritsuko turned to him as she raised her gold ringed finger. "I didn't ask for your opinion." Shigeru sneered as he eyed her. "But I'm giving it you all the same we already have one pilot who is in the hospital wing and will take a number of days to recover, you really want another?"
Ritsuko eyed him she hated Shigeru, Kaji and Maya, Makoto would have agreed with her in a heartbeat but he wasn't here right now he was elsewhere. "The reason this is going ahead is because Asuka and Mari have a similar brain wave patterns, they have a similar way of thinking and analysing problems." She leaned against the chair off Misato's office. "That is why we believe this will work."
Misato narrowed her gaze. "I really don't care for your science on this topic, to me they are not the same on any level and since you don't spend any time with the pilots you wouldn't know that. Yes in battles they use similar patterns and strategy to get to accomplish the same goals but once they get out of those plug suits they are totally different people on every level. I mean you programmed these Evangelion's you know that its not just about the fighting they have accept the pilot as a whole with all the bad and good points, it's the reason the Beta and Omega unit became training units because they were so unreliable because they never synced that well with the pilots."
She stepped back folding her arms. "Those were your words when we first started training pilots." Ritsuko looked at her for a long moment. "Things change." Misato breathed in deeply. "No you've changed that's the whole problem you've forgotten what it is to care about other people just like Gendo." Ritsuko felt her whole body tense as she looked up. "Do not speak ill of my husband!" She raised her hand. "Because we both know I can make life very hard for you here." She watched as the dark haired woman looked away the anger in her face. "You should be happy, you don't even like Mari she is a monumental pain just like Asuka who has always been a problem." Misato turned meeting the other woman's cold gaze. "I hate Mari's behaviour its not that I hate Mari, she's a young woman who has issues like all of the other pilots have I would get zero pleasure from seeing this test going wrong and seeing her end up in the hospital wing."
She breathed in deeply. "Also yes Asuka's is a pain but she is better than she was I mean she is at least tolerable now and she doesn't go around hitting people and throwing around abuse." She put a hand on her hip. "She's a young woman who has behavioural problems which were caused by her childhood and she's not the only one. Some of the pilots have seen awful things in there past that they shouldn't. Toji's mother died from starvation and he lived in poverty in China with his little sister, Kaworu's rebel mother sacrificed her life for him when fighting force broke in to their house and machined gunned her down. Mari's mother was brutality murdered and she also had to deal with poverty in Britain and Rei and Shinji's mother Yui died during the Evangelion 01 test as well as there aunt Kiko who died in the Evangelion 00 test on the same day, they never even got to bury either of their bodies." She tensed painfully. "You should be proud even astounded that any of these pilots can function as well as they do, they are a credit to their countries of origin and they deserve respect. They also know there lives are on hold because in all the years we have fought this battle they know an angel can come at any time sometimes its years apart but they always know their coming and that until all of them are defeated that they have to pilot no matter what."
She looked up slightly. "They also have to do this while trying to live normal lives despite that some of them have an almost godlike celebrity status and when they mess up in any way, the world press is on them like a rash and they get their faces plastered all over the news and reminded that they messed up even if they didn't because the media love its heroes and villains and likes to make out that there are winners and losers." She felt her hand form a fist. "They don't see six pilots fighting for the world they only care that their pilot is the one that gets in the final blow that killed an angel that is literally all that matters to them." She looked down sadly. "Not to mention that five of them are now a stable parts of every young boy and girls toys line." She shook her head. "You can walk in to any store now and buy a Shinji poster or an Asuka action figure or a Rei mug, Nerv gets so much revenue from this that we are swimming in money, we don't need to struggle anymore to out fit new Evangelion parts we have heaps of parts lying around, old plating parts gets put in museums and has been made part of history.
"The pilot's countries still have to pay out for there bullets despite that they shouldn't have to, it's crazy. Because of all this I made that collectors room up in the visitor centre, because I didn't want these poor young adults to feel so terrified by it all and to see these things as part of their accomplishments rather than what they are which is a massive proper ganger machine to make the public think that the pilots are gods, when their not they are just young men and women who can cry and bleed."
Ritsuko shook her head. "None of this concerns or even moves me I don't care about any off it, if anything it's makes your job easier! What I care about is both you, Kaji and Shigeru following my orders. You can paint your pilots how ever you wish it doesn't change the fact that there just tools of war and there job is to fight angels get rid of the three terrorists groups who threaten us and do humanitarian work where ever possible. So you will follow this order no matter how much you and Shigeru hate it, Mari is going to do the test tomorrow morning regardless!"
Misato watched as she left slamming the door behind she turned kicking one of the stools close by sending it flying as she looked at the closed door. "I hate that woman." Shigeru folded his arms. "That makes two of us it was so much easier when she wasn't Gendo's wife." Misato sat down looking over her e-mails, which were mostly get well wish messages for Asuka from people all around the world.
Since it had been publicly announced that she was alive and recovering they had been sent down from Nerv's media centre which was above ground like the visitor centre, both of these building were opposite one another. Asuka didn't care for these messages she'd said in the past that she didn't want to be shown them because the people were just being fake. She was in part right but at the same time wrong as she had opened messages in the past which were from school children who had done pictures of her but she would probably never look at them as she said in the past that she didn't like kids and that she didn't want to be around them.
She looked up meeting Shigeru's concerned gaze. "Yeah well I heard that Gendo cheated on Yui, I only met Yui once I was a teenager at the time and she was so kind and caring, I hate that her and her sister Kiko suffered due to some awful error which meant they both got sucked in to the core which meant they both couldn't return and died." She turned looking out of the window over at unit 01 and 00 which were seated side by side in a huge red lake of blood which came up to there shoulders. "It's a truly horrible way to die to starve out in some void like that and have your bones rotting away in to nothing."
Shigeru moved a step closer to the window. "That's why you fear the test right, because you think that could happen to Mari if unit 02 doesn't play nice?" Misato looked at him for a long moment before speaking. "Yes because Rei said when she switched units she felt like she was being eaten alive and she saw some real awful imagery like war torn battles and people being blown up, I think when these units don't like the pilot they try to consume them."
She leaned forward. "Also unit 02 has been so twitchy this past year, I mean at first it was always unit 01 but it's so calm now it hardly ever moves on its own unlike 00 which is starting to twitch as well." Her gaze shifted to unit 02 which was also in the red water and was sitting next to the huge pink unit 04 which was Mari's behind them was the white and red 03 and behind that Evangelion was an empty bay which was waiting for unit 05 which was going to be black or so she had heard.
"I think there's just too much of Asuka in unit 02 and I think it might react due to her bad feeling towards Mari." She looked at the units four green eyes. "It's a beast, it doesn't have the nickname Nekomata for nothing and it takes a very strong personality to control it, a personality that is in its self aggressive." She leaned back in her chair. "Mari just isn't that person yes she's aggressive and bold but not nearly half as fire some as Asuka. I see nothing but pain and misery once she steps in to that entry plug the only good thing is that unlike Rei we now have much better protocols in place so the moment this goes to shit we can pull her out before her brain starts getting minced."
8
Toji eyed Mari who was sitting side ways on her sofa chair turning a three dimensional hologram between her fingers which was coming out from a part of the chairs arm which could be twisted around to face you it had a black tablet like interface and full holograms could be brought up if you inserted a data card insert so pilots could put in this special high powered card which was like a mini computer and work on there personal projects.
All of the pilots had these interfaces attached to there sofa's though Shinji and Kaworu rarely ever used there's. They preferred paper or brought in their hobbies which were hands on, he used the interface and data cards along with Rei, Asuka and Mari. He watched as the very dark haired woman threw lines of code away from the cube which was meant to a coding puzzle and brain game they were all in casual clothing as the long day had ended. "So like what's the worst question you've ever been asked you?" Mari looked up at Toji. "How can you be a pilot when you don't have twenty, twenty vision?" She turned back to him. "Which in really insulting just because I have trouble seeing without my glasses it doesn't mean I can't be pilot." Toji felt a smile form. "Yeah well their clearly just jealous because they know that in the normal military to pilot tanks and planes, they have to be perfect, where as we can eat what we want and do what we want."
Mari raised her finger. "Apart from get in the unit drunk or have a hang over, because they say it really ruins your mental sync." Toji turned to Shinji who was working on a drawing on his pad while Rei was sitting opposite playing video games on her hand held. "What was your worst question?"
Shinji looked up lowering his pad and pencil. "It wasn't a question it was more a view point being that I only got put on to the program due to my father being in charge which wasn't true, he forced myself and Rei into this program we had no idea what we were doing in the beginning." Toji turned to Kaworu who was writing on a music sheet. "Okay your worst." Kaworu looked up his red eyes glinting as he pushed his thick short white hair back. "Like Shinji it was more a statement that I shouldn't pilot because of my history of being a rebel fighter and that I might turn in to a terrorist and use an Evangelion to my own ends to end the war in my own country." Toji slowly turned to Rei who had been very quite through out the conversation. "You?"
Rei carried on playing. "I really don't want to talk about it." Mari smirked as she looked up at the smaller woman. "She probably got asked if she fucked Asuka because rumour has it you turned her down once." Rei paused her game looking up. "Seriously were do you get off acting this way?" Mari narrowed her gaze as she closed down her hologram. "You know Asuka's an asshole all the time but I never ever hear you or your brother complaining about it."
Rei shook her head. "You just dig at her every chance you get, she's in the hospital wing because of what you did and she's really suffering." Mari felt a cold smile form. "Good maybe she'll finally get what it's like when your not top dog." Rei lowered her hand held blinking in shock. "How can you say that, that is just so cruel?" Shinji looked at his sister. "She's not worth it Rei, don't go down to her level she obviously has some real deep set issues."
Rei stood up looking at Asuka's large sofa chair which could fit two but only she ever sat on it, it was at the front of the room and opposite where she was sitting on the sofa she turned back to Mari. "No I'm not letting this go! This isn't right or even fair so let me tell you something Mari we care about Asuka she came on to the Evangelion program a year after we started and no she's not perfect she's moody and angry and she can be very difficult at times but she respects us, she isn't cruel to ether off us. You think you're a great pilot just because you get in that entry plug but you have yet to sacrifice yourself against an angel."
She put a hand in her jeans pocket. "Asuka has countess times and this is not her first near death experience, she's willing to wreck unit 02's every body part if it gives us a chance to win and out of all the units hers and Shinji's have had the most battle damage over the years." She looked at her hand. "She's not doing it for glory or to show off she just wants the war to end, we all do." She was about to say more only for the double doors to open as Kaji walked in a smile on his face. "Sorry to bother you all."
He eased up a note which was between his fingers. "These are orders from Gendo himself." He walked over to Mari. "They're for you." Mari stood up taking the note from his hand opening it. "For me why thank you." She began to read them over a wide smile appearing on her face. "I'm going to test pilot unit 02." Kaji nodded as he looked up. "It's a switch test just to be clear you will not be piloting it above ground." Mari looked at note. "Cool I've always wanted to see in side princess's entry plug." She watched as Kaji turned walking towards the door. "You're leaving, no congratulations?"
Kaji raised his hand not turning back as he walked away from her. "Good night Mari, just be at the test tomorrow." Rei watched he closed the doors behind him vanishing from sight. "You're unbelievable you hate Asuka yet you want to pilot her unit." Mari shrugged as she looked at her. "How often do you get to see in side your rival's entry plug?" Rei felt her body tense. "Believe me you don't want to enter that entry plug I've been inside someone else's entry plug, very bad things happen to you."
Mari raised her finger eyeing the smaller woman. "No I read about that thing with you in Kaworu's unit, I think you just weren't strong enough to handle it mentality." Shinji stood up sharply. "My sister can handle anything! What happened that day was nothing to do with her mental sync, it was the unit it rejected her and unit 02 will reject you just the same."
Rei stepped back. "The things a unit that's not yours will show you are just horrible." Mari looked at her. "Only for you maybe…" Rei turned picking motor bike jacket. "Excuse me everyone I'm going home I don't want to listen to this." Mari watched as she moved towards the double doors. "You know you having no stomach for real confrontation it's really saddening plus I heard that once up a time you used to apologise for everything like a good little Japanese's girl."
Rei turned looking at her for a long moment before speaking. "I only apologise to those who I feel I've truly offended, I've yet to offend you in that way, because you have not yet earned my respect." She left closing the doors behind her she was so glad that her sports bike was out of the garage because she could just go home and forget about how awful this day had turned out to be first with Asuka being so out of it and now this.
End of part 7
Silvermoonlight