[Setting: A Park of Coincidences]

The sun beams down on a lively park, where Elliot stands near a fountain, coffee cup in hand, trying to savor a rare moment of solitude. A saxophone player nearby is tuning his instrument, a group of children chases each other across the lawn, and a goat munches peacefully on a discarded pamphlet.

Elliot (sipping his coffee, muttering): “Finally. A normal—"

[Suddenly, a rustling comes from a cluster of bushes. Elliot freezes mid-sip, groaning as he looks toward the noise.]

Elliot (to himself): “It’s happening again, isn’t it?”

[Sure enough, out steps the God of Coincidence, grinning ear-to-ear and dressed in a mismatched adventurer’s outfit—part Indiana Jones, part tourist shop mishap. In their hand is a rolled-up map, waved like a baton.]

God of Coincidence: “Elliot! Just the man I was hoping to find!”

Elliot (sighing): “You know, I’m starting to think peace and quiet are myths. What now? And what’s with the outfit?”

God of Coincidence (beaming, unrolling the map dramatically): “Ah, but getting lost is part of the fun, isn’t it? Behold—the Map of Curious Happenings! A tale in itself, and one that is destined for you.”

[Elliot glances at the map, suspiciously.]

Elliot: “Let me guess: this is another one of your schemes to get me involved in something absurd?”

God of Coincidence: “Absurd? No, no. Enlightening? Absolutely. You see, this map is not like others. It doesn’t chart what is, but what might be. A bench, a tree, a pond, a saxophone—”

Elliot (cutting in): “Let me stop you there. This isn’t going to involve goats or umbrellas, is it?”

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God of Coincidence (feigning offense): “Would I ever repeat myself? …Don’t answer that. But no! This map is unique, Elliot. It doesn’t lead to treasure in the traditional sense. It leads to where you need to be.”

[Elliot eyes the map skeptically, then sighs and unrolls it. The symbols make little sense: a tree, a saxophone, a pineapple, crisscrossing lines… and, of course, an umbrella.]

Elliot (groaning): “Umbrellas. Always with the umbrellas.”

God of Coincidence (nodding solemnly): “A classic motif. Now, let us begin the journey.”

[The Journey Begins]

[The two set off, following the map’s cryptic directions. First, they arrive at a bench carved with tiny umbrella motifs. Elliot rolls his eyes but moves on. At the pond, a swan swims lazily, but nothing remarkable happens. Next, they reach the fountain.]

Elliot: “Alright, let me guess. Something ridiculous is about to—”

[A saxophone player emerges from behind the fountain, playing a jazzy tune. Elliot groans.]

Elliot (gesturing dramatically): “Of course. Why wouldn’t there be a saxophonist waiting here?”

God of Coincidence (smiling): “Life is music, Elliot. Sometimes, you just have to stop and listen.”

[The Gazebo and the Pineapple]

[Finally, the map leads them to a gazebo, where an elderly woman sits on a bench feeding birds with pineapple chunks. She smiles warmly as they approach.]

Elderly Woman: “Hello there. Would you like some pineapple?”

Elliot (hesitating, glancing at the god, then back): “Uh… sure.”

[He takes a piece, sitting beside her as the God of Coincidence lingers nearby, grinning.]

Elderly Woman: “You know, my husband used to bring me pineapple every Saturday when we came to this park. He’d say it was a way to share a bit of sunshine, even on the cloudiest days. Funny how the smallest things can mean so much, isn’t it?”

[Elliot looks down at the pineapple, then back at her, a small smile tugging at his lips.]

Elliot (softly): “Yeah… yeah, I guess it is.”

[The Subtext Unfolds]

[The God of Coincidence steps forward, holding the map aloft as if concluding a grand tale.]

God of Coincidence: “And thus, the map’s journey ends—not with gold or glory, but with a quiet moment worth savoring. Isn’t it beautiful, Elliot?”

Elliot (smiling faintly): “I guess you’re right. Sometimes, the little things are enough.”

Elderly Woman: “Sometimes, they’re everything.”

[T.Pratchett, the goat, trots into view, snatching the map from the god’s hand. Elliot groans as the goat bleats triumphantly and begins chewing.]

God of Coincidence (laughing): “Ah, the goat strikes again. A perfect ending, wouldn’t you say?”

Elliot: “Perfect for you, maybe. For me? I just want coffee.”

[End Scene]

[retcon:2]