Lucille had to admit that she felt a bit out of place. She wasn't used to running around in such a big group. Right now, she was accompanying the empress in the garden, and it felt odd.
After all, Blanche was adorned in the most lavish dress and accessories imaginable while beaming like the sun. Even as she held Aurora, who slept calmly while being cuddled into her fancy blanket, she looked breathtaking. Though, that wasn't the issue. Joining her alone would have been fine.
But the empress' three maids were directly next to them, along with two guards who protected the people here from any imaginable danger.
Lucille couldn't help but admit that she was the least striking person of all of those individuals After all, she didn't even have the confidence or gentleness that they exhibited. She wasn't intimidating either. She was just herself. Lucille was in the midst of all of those special people, and that almost made her stand out again because she was so boring.
This was only enforced by the fact that the empress kept arguing about one specific thing. “I really don't get why you don't want to order dresses from the tailor. They are so pretty.” She had said that about five times already.
Lucille averted her eyes as she replied. “Yes. Exactly. Someone like you can wear them, but for me, it's...”
Blanche cut her off. “Don't be like that. You are beautiful.” Coming from her, this was odd. She was the one glowing in the sun, and her radiant smile made it even more breathtaking. It wouldn't be a miracle if people fell in love with her just because of that sight. Maybe she didn't notice it, but she was so happy that her presence was just pleasant enough to make people like her immediately, and her kindness could do the rest.
It wouldn't have been odd for even Cedar to find her pretty upon meeting her.
Lucille gritted her teeth when she thought about that. Was she stupid? She shouldn't trust anything Jenna said. She also shouldn't be dejected because of something so unimportant. Instead of indulging in her strange worries about a past that didn't matter much anymore, she should have focused on being happy with Cedar liking her at the moment. She couldn't demand more than that, and even this was a luxury when an emotionless marriage could also be possible.
Still, she couldn't bring herself to forget those words. Maybe because a glowing woman like Blanche fit together with a wonderful person like Cedar. And the worst part was that Lucille had managed to make him worry about this matter since she apparently hadn't been able to hide her concern at all.
The empress stopped in her tracks and turned around. “Lucille?”
Lucille snapped out of her thoughts. “I sincerely apologize. I was mentally absent for a moment.” She tried to forget her bitterness about having allowed Jenna to mess with her and focused on the original conversation. “I meant to say that I do not wish to receive any dresses because it would feel...odd to wear them. As you know, I do not like being too striking in public, so...” She forced herself to meet the empress' gaze.
Blanche pursed her lips before replying. “But that would be a shame. You wore Madame Charture's dresses already. Why would you not do it again? You need to dress in her attires in the future anyway. Do you think the princess consort of our nation could simply go without dressing up prettily? That won't do. And you said that you need to gain confidence before you marry Cedar too. Doing it like this is good, right? People will already look at you because he escorts you, so you might as well look even more breathtaking than you usually do. I don't mean to change your taste completely, of course. You can tell Madam Charture what kinds of dresses you like. And you don't have to buy many either. Getting some every few months would be a good idea so that you don't have to order a whole bunch at once.”
Lucille had listened to all of that, and still, only one thing had stuck to her. She watched the other woman with skepticism and hugged herself while trying to voice her doubts in a way that wasn't too obvious. “I...understand what you mean. But...at the same time, I don't... We don't know for how long...this will go on. Theoretically, I would have to go back to Father as soon as the matter with the dowager empress is solved.”
Blanche scanned the other's expression for a moment before she turned to Stella. She handed over her sleeping baby, gave her daughter a small kiss and then focused her attention on Lucille. “I think you are too worried about nothing. I can tell you one thing about Cedar. It takes long to get to know him and even longer for him to open up to you. But when he does it, he will not give up on you for the rest of his life. And you captured him. I'm pretty sure that he would already die for you, and your bond will only get stronger from now on. Don't believe that he would allow another person to even hold your hand. He will get really upset if you try something like that. So, marrying someone else is almost impossible now. Do you even have the desire to search for another person?”
If Lucille was completely honest, she didn't have that desire. She slowly shook her head without really being sure what to say. Cedar was by far her favorite person. She liked no one else more than him, and she was sure that her first love was the real deal. So, marrying him, who liked her too, seemed like it would be the perfect solution. But... “What if he changes his mind? Because...he finds someone that is much more admirable than me?”
Blanche put one of her hands onto her hip before lifting her index finger. “First of all, don't compare yourself to others. You don't need to change anything or feel like you are inferior. You are perfect in each and every way. Now. Why would he change his mind when he is clearly enamored with you? Does Cedar seem like someone who runs around and has countless relationships? He doesn't make friends easily and only opens up after a lot of time. And even then, he certainly doesn't hug them or spend the night in their room. This is romantic, you hear me? And when he loves, he will be absolutely devoted and loyal.” She had sounded so convinced and serious while saying that. She only lowered the volume of her voice and spoke in a softer tone when she finished. “But why did you ask that in the first place?”
Lucille stood there and tugged at her fingers while averting her eyes. She would like to hear advice, but at the same time, she didn't dare admit that she was seriously worrying about what Lady Peril had said. Her heart clenched, and it felt like she was getting overwhelmed by worry. More than about Cedar liking Blanche, this might be about Lucille being worried about her overwhelming jealousy. Maybe it was stupid, but she needed help with this. She couldn't ask Cedar, so she had to address this now. Her voice barely worked as she tried to speak. “Could we...talk about this alone?”
Blanche only took a second to gesture to the people around her. In an instant, her entourage stepped aside a little to give the women enough space so that they could talk quietly. She came closer to Lucille and then spoke up. “Go ahead. I will listen.”
Lucille averted her eyes. She was probably blushing already, but she had to speak now despite her voice being shaky. “Did...you ever feel...jealous?” Probably not. After all, Theodore and Blanche had always been completely and utterly in love.
But the empress replied without hesitation. “Yes. A million times. Not anymore because I know that there is only me for Theo, like there is only him for me.” She sounded dreamy while saying that part but quickly became serious again. “But in the past, I was scared of not being good enough. And then there was the former empress. That woman seemed so perfect, and she was Theodore's wife. I hated her. I thought she would take my Theo away from me. But as you can see, that didn't happen. Because Theo and I love each other. After I told him about my worries, he finally paid more attention to what he was doing and reminded me of our devotion countless times. And over time, it got much better.”
After hearing that, Lucille almost apologized. It was understandable that Blanche hadn't been happy about her lover being married to another woman. It seemed like even that wonderful couple wasn't at ease with the chance of the other partner seeing someone else. Maybe Lucille being jealous wasn't so bad then. “I see.”
Blanche paused for a few seconds, and when nothing came, she narrowed her eyes. “Cedar didn't show interest in someone else, did he? He isn't like that. I would almost bet Artias' well-being on him never betraying the one he loves. He would rather set the world on fire to prevent anyone from hurting you, so he wouldn't be the one to make you feel bad.”
Lucille would like to say so much that she didn't know where to begin. “No... He...”
The empress crossed her arms and resumed without taking a break. “I would have guessed that he might rather do the opposite of showing interest in others. He is only open with you, right? He needs trust to fall in love, and you are the only one who shares that bond with him. Cedar should be the type who treasures what he cares about. If there is an issue, it would rather be him being jealous, right? Did he get upset after you talked to a man? He might not have admitted it, but I would assume that he gets jealous extremely easily. You will probably need to remind him that you love him over and over again.”
Lucille's head stopped working for a moment. She lifted her hands to shake them a bit while trying to explain. “No, that's...I...”
Luckily, that was enough to make Blanche guess what had happened to some extent. “You got jealous?” She paused for a moment as if she was confused and then resumed. “Tell me what happened. Or no. Better yet, tell him. I can assure you that it is only a misunderstanding. Cedar is too... What do I call it? He is too devoted to ever hurt you like that. He treasures friends deeply, and if you are even closer than that, I would assume that he will get even more focused on making you happy. If you have to worry about something, it will be him smothering you with affection. At least that is what I would assume. I never saw how he acted when he was in love, really in love. He likes you more than he ever liked anyone else.”
Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.
Lucille felt her heart skip a beat when she heard that. For some reason, it was calming to hear this from another person. She herself was sure that Cedar cared for her, and if others said the same, she couldn't help but be even more certain. She knew that he liked her. Even if he had liked the empress at some point, that was over. Which meant that she had been stupid enough to get upset because of something Lady Peril had told her to anger her. It was a bit pathetic to fall for such easy tricks.
Lucille fiddled with her hands and quickly averted her eyes. “Well... I...” She wasn't sure what to say now that she had admitted to being jealous.
Blanche came another step toward her and scanned the other woman's expression. “You really got jealous. Was it because of something he did? If so, I can assure you that he didn't mean to get close to whoever bothered him. He dislikes physical contact. He might ignore that if he wants to annoy others, but he wouldn't let women like Lady Peril touch him without telling them to stay away. And if even that is too close for your taste, he will change it. You only need to tell him what the problem is, and he will move heaven and earth to avoid upsetting you. Please believe me when it comes to this.”
Lucille already felt the traitorous heat of her cheeks and looked to the side. She didn't want to admit it. Why had she been so incredibly stupid? She had been talking to Lady Peril. No one should believe a single word about Cedar that came out of that woman's mouth. “I...definitely misunderstood.” Even if Cedar possibly having fallen in love once before wasn't a problem at all, she was rather relieved now.
Blanche didn't give her time to think about that though. “Good. But you should still talk to him about it. Cedar always hides his feelings, so there can't be a wall of lies between you. You need to steer him a bit. You have to ask what he feels like and show him that he should never hide his worries because he doesn't want to burden you. In return, you have to open up to him too. Talking about your hopes and worries is the most important part of any relationship.” She spoke with so much emphasis that her stance was clear. Her serious expression made that even more obvious.
Lucille could already guess how embarrassed she would be if she was forced to tell Cedar about this. So, she couldn't promise anything. She just nodded at the empress without making eye contact. “I...will try to-”
Blanche interrupted her. “Indeed. You will.” Her expression softened as she spoke with a bit more regret than determination. “You have to. Cedar probably noticed that you are feeling unwell. You know how he is. He will blame himself, and that isn't what he needs. He needs affirmations of love until he can't hear it anymore. If he thinks that you are unhappy in a relationship with him, he will feel horrible. So, you need to be open about which problems you see. And aside from that, there is another important reason to talk about this. Because this burdens you. Don't swallow your uncertainty. You need to be happy too. Alright?” All of that sounded logical.
Lucille weakly nodded while tugging at the skin next to her fingernails. It would be uncomfortable if she told Cedar that she worried about what Jenna had told her. But it would be better to do it. “I understand.”
Blanche remained silent for a moment. She scanned the other woman before a slight smile came back onto her lips. “Good. I apologize for being so strict. It's just that I know what keeping quiet about misunderstandings can do. Please don't let that get in your way. We will have a nice picnic now, and after that, you can go talk to him. Does that sound good?”
Lucille nodded again. The empress took that as her cue to start walking toward their destination, and Lucille, who was already lost in thoughts, followed her. What she had promised to talk about would probably cause a strange conversation. She didn't even know how to address this topic. She couldn't just run to Cedar and ask him whether he had lied about not falling in love before.
Lucille barely took two dozen steps before she was stopped by someone playing with her hair. She froze in the middle of her movement. She felt a light touch on her head, and then someone put her hair over her shoulder.
And a second later, someone whispered into her ear. “I knew I saw that familiar shade of red. Hello.” That was unmistakably Cedar, who seemed to like overwhelming her.
Lucille's legs almost gave in. The fact that he had surprised her was bad enough, and now she even had to deal with him whispering into her ear. “Cedar...” Her voice shook a little despite her not wanting to lose her composure at all.
Cedar finally stepped out from behind her and showed her an enchanting smile. “I wish you a wonderful day. How have you been? Are you in the group of Aurora's admirers again?”
Lucille nodded at him while trying to get over her initial shock. He hadn't heard the conversation, right? “I...had a nice day. Nothing special happened. And we are really going out with Aurora.”
Cedar let out a small huff. “Unsurprisingly. I feel like that little girl will become a brat if everyone spoils her like this.” He turned his head, and his gaze fell onto the empress. He bowed his head, which earned him an annoyed glare.
Blanche, who had noticed Cedar as well and stopped to watch the couple, crossed her arms. “Really? Didn't I tell you to stop bowing? You are just doing that to annoy me, aren't you? Theo said that you also did it with him. You little troublemaker.” She lifted her hand to push a strand of her hair over her shoulder before a smile came onto her lips. “But I will forgive you since the both of you are adorable together. I'm glad that we finally have another couple. The royal family should be a bit bigger than this.”
Lucille averted her eyes at that innuendo. But it didn't help much when Cedar just saw that as a sign to take her hand. She had to admit that it felt good for him to do that so naturally even though people were watching. She didn't dare to gaze anywhere in his direction, but she interlocked their fingers.
Cedar sounded like he was smiling when he responded to the empress. “I wish you a beautiful day full of peace too.” He was silent for a moment, probably to indicate that he might end up saying the title. But Blanche glared at him, so he went without it. “I apologize if I interrupted your conversation. I just saw Lucille from behind and wasn't sure whether she was talking to anyone. I came here to steal her away. Is that unfitting right now?”
Blanche showed him a bright smile. “Oh, I see. We wanted to have a picnic, but I will let you two love birds get away. Provided that you take a cupcake each. We will have too much otherwise.” She didn't wait for an affirmation from the couple and just waved to her maid.
Darlene rushed over with the basket and opened it to present the full plate to both of them. She seemed to be drooling over the sweets already and didn't even feel the need to hide that. “I can assure you that all of them are wonderful. But chocolate has to be the best flavor.”
Lucille gazed inside and went through all the different kinds of sweets she found. She suspected she wouldn't be able to leave without taking anything, so she gazed in and picked a chocolate cupcake.
Cedar seemed like he would just randomly take the first one that lay the closest to him.
But Blanche chimed in here. “Wait. You will get your favorite flavor.” She gestured toward the basket, as if one would be able to guess what she meant to show among the dozen cupcakes.
Cedar seemed to understand it though. “You are odd, Your-”
Blanche cut him off. “No title.”
“Fine.” Cedar took out a strawberry cupcake, but it almost looked like he just did it so that the empress would leave him alone. “Are you happy now? I am not sure why you would need to control my diet.”
Blanche beamed at him and ignored that comment. “I'm happy if you eat what you like. Anyway. Lucille is worried about something. You need to talk about that. As soon as possible.”
Lucille had already bitten into the cupcake and almost choked on that when she heard the empress' comment. As always, it seemed like she didn't have much of a chance here. Now she would need to talk about this.
To her surprise, Cedar didn't seem to be taken aback. He just smiled down at her and replied. “I planned on doing that now. That's why I'm abducting her. I hope that the timing wasn't too bad.”
Lucille weakly shook her head as her panic already rose inside her. They would do this now? What was she supposed to say? She couldn't just delay the conversation anymore. She would have to tell Cedar. That would be embarrassing. She averted her eyes and quickly swallowed the bite of cupcake in her mouth. “I...am free to come with you. Since Her-” She corrected herself. “Since I was given permission.”
Blanche chimed in at that. “Good. Then hurry up. I don't want you to drag out the conversation until something else forces you to delay it. There is only one thing I need to remind you of before you leave. Lady Peril's party. The invitations arrived yesterday. Cedar, it would be good if you escorted Lucille that day. I don't want that woman to try anything.”
Lucille froze at that. She had almost forgotten that. Surely, going to Jenna's party wouldn't be pleasant, but with Cedar, it would be fine. There was only one problem. “I didn't receive an invitation.”
Cedar turned to her again. He was silent for a second before speaking. “She has to send you one though. I wouldn't be surprised if she was petty enough to send it to your father. We will contact him tomorrow. We still have a week, so your invitation will arrive on time. If not, I will stay home too.” That was understandable. He would probably end up in an unpleasant situation if he came there without a partner while Lady Peril was roaming around.
Blanche glared into the distance for a moment before she shook her head. “What a horrible person. We'll make sure that nothing happens. But as you said, we have some time until then. Please sort out your feelings first. I will return to my angel now.” Her expression softened. “It is probably good that you leave now, Lucille. Theo will come in a minute, and I doubt that you want to watch us cuddle. Goodbye then. Don't forget to talk about your feelings.” She didn't accept any criticism and left while waving.
Lucille looked after her for a moment. Her nervousness came back with full force. She wasn't sure what to act like now that she knew that she would have to address her worry soon. So, she stared at the empress' back while holding onto Cedar's hand. “Her Majesty knows a lot about you. She always makes assumptions about your feelings.” It was almost surprising to hear that Blanche spoke as if she understood what the prince needed to some extent.
Cedar looked at his lover. “I know. I find it odd too.” He lifted his hand and gazed at the cupcake he had taken. “I certainly never told her. Or anyone else for that matter. Maybe she thinks she is a mind-reader or something like that.” For some reason, that wouldn't be too surprising.
But at the same time, that comment made Lucille's heart skip a beat. She barely dared to make eye contact with her lover, but she forced herself to do it. “So...you were never close to her?”
Cedar replied without hesitation. “What is that supposed to mean? Her Majesty hated me ever since we first met. I'm not sure why she changed her mind. But like I said, she is odd. I can't understand her at all. If you want to know what she is thinking, you have to ask her directly. But right now is not the time for that.” His smile became a bit brighter. “We should go to your room for a bit. For the past few days, something bothered you, right? And I feel like it would be good to talk about that now.”
Lucille gave a weak affirmation before letting Cedar guide her toward the third floor. Her heart was hammering in her chest, and she could hear how blood rushing through her veins. She hated how nervous she was, but she couldn't just flip a switch. She had to go along with everything and accompany her lover. She would need to tell him that she was jealous because Lady Peril had told her something odd about last year. That could only be humiliating.