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The Broken Prince's Love
Chapter 103: Confidence

Chapter 103: Confidence

Lucille had to admit that she had acted before she could think about it. After all, Cedar had been in danger, and she had wanted to confirm that he would be safe for the rest of the night. So, she had invited him in. She only realized what she was doing when she saw the maids' aghast expression.

After that, Lucille retreated into her room hurriedly to avoid facing the judgmental people around her. She was glad that Cedar followed her quickly, even if she was still embarrassed. She stopped in the middle of her room and played around with her fingers. “Uhm... Do you want to wait...for the servants? Or should we prepare something already?”

To her surprise, Cedar didn't stay in the center of her room. Instead, he steered toward the bathroom immediately. He answered her question by gesturing to his red hand. “I will have to retreat already to prevent this from dripping. I apologize for that. We will see each other when I'm done washing.”

Lucille weakly nodded as she watched him disappear into the bathroom. Then she walked to her bed and plopped down onto the mattress. She could only sit there and wait.

A few servants came with water, brought it into the bathroom and disappeared immediately.

Lucille thanked them absentmindedly while she began to sway her feet forward and backward. She had announced that she wanted Cedar to sleep in her room in front of so many witnesses. Maybe she should worry a bit more. But then again, she had already hugged him in public and had slept in his chambers, much like he had been in hers. By now, the rumors didn't matter much. Especially since spreading those might make it necessary for Lucille to marry the person that was mentioned in them as well.

That thought made her fall back onto the bed. Lucille grabbed her pillow and hugged it to distract herself. She couldn't think like that. Marrying Cedar would be nice but only if he wanted it to. Not just because he wanted to take responsibility. But it seemed as if he liked Lucille enough to marry her. Cedar had told her that on multiple occasions. He was so kind to her and even claimed that this was closer to love than a normal friendship.

Lucille was in the middle of rolling around and overthinking when she heard a noise. She jumped up and scanned the prince.

Cedar had come out of the bath. He was already dressed and only used a towel to dry his hair. He didn't do much, but it made him look like a personified god.

Lucille couldn't keep herself from staring at him. It was truly unfair. Someone like him only needed a single second to captivate everyone in the room. He was so different from her, who always hid to the best of her abilities. She surely didn't seem like someone who could stand next to him in public.

And yet, Cedar showed her a radiant smile as soon as he saw her. “I hope I didn't make you wait for too long. I wanted to make sure that I'm clean before coming back.”

Lucille almost forgot how to speak for a moment. Her mouth opened, and then she closed it again. She took a few seconds before bringing herself to reply. “You didn't make me wait. I...was just sitting here. You...” She stopped herself before the compliment slipped out. But then she questioned herself. Was it bad to tell him how wonderful he was? Probably not. She was just embarrassed. But it was only fair that she should tell him that when he always surprised her with a compliment. So, she forced herself to do the same even if she had to avert her eyes. “You look...wonderful when you smile like that. I mean... Normally, you look wonderful too, but when you show me a genuine smile, it's overwhelming.” She felt how her cheeks were beginning to turn a dark red. It was almost ridiculous how quickly she reacted when it came to him. She had been so quiet, and yet, it felt like she had already said too much.

Cedar probably barely heard her words, but his bright smile remained as he replied. “Really? Thank you very much. At least someone likes it when I smile.” He ruffled through his hair again before putting the towel away. Then he came toward the bed and grinned at her in a manner that made her grateful that she was sitting. “Then I can demand a reward for showing you a smile? How about you give me a genuine smile back soon?” It was easy to guess what her reaction would be, and his chuckle affirmed that. “But that bashful expression is rather cute too.”

It wasn't good if Lucille got so excited before sleeping. She would probably lay awake for hours. She didn't even manage to give a reply. She just stubbornly looked to the side.

Cedar took the remaining steps and stopped right in front of her.

She wasn't sure what she expected or hoped for, but when she made the mistake of looking up, her heart almost stopped.

Cedar had only lifted his hand to push a strand of her hair away, and that was enough to make her body refuse to work. The prince gave her such a captivating smile that she didn't even think about looking away anymore. Cedar used that to make her even more embarrassed. He kept meeting her gaze while carefully twirling her hair around his finger. Then he lifted the strand to his mouth and leaned down to press a small kiss onto it. When he pulled back, he slowly released her hair but added another thing that made her heart weak. “You are beautiful enough to enchant me just with one little glimpse. If you find me pleasing to look at, I'm happy because it gives me a chance to admire you too.”

Lucille would have stumbled by now if she wasn't sitting. Her chest felt like she had drunk something warm, and her stomach bubbled as if she was nauseous. But it was a pleasant feeling. She stared up at the prince while being unsure of what to say. Should she compliment him again? She didn't know what to compliment him for. There were too many kind things this man had to offer. “I...” She ended up saying what she really thought at that moment. “I like you a lot. So... seeing each other often is good.” What kind of comment was that? This was ridiculous.

Cedar let out a little laugh. “Right now, we are living together, so you don't have to worry about anything. And I can assure you that I'm not good at giving up something I like either.” He finished while lifting his hand to gently run his knuckles down the side of her face. That was enough to make her freeze. His grin almost seemed to prove that something else would follow, but he didn't do that. Instead, he just lowered his hand and took a step back. “And I suppose that I will sleep on the sofa?” Something in his voice made him sound amused.

Lucille blinked at him. She took a moment to collect herself before she replied. “That...” She barely managed to say that and then stopped. She hadn't intended to force him to stay on the sofa. Normally, he had always cuddled with her while they slept. Would it be strange if she told him that she would favor that?

Cedar's gaze pierced hers as if he had only been waiting for her to hesitate. “Or are you going to invite a man into your bed instead of just pulling him into your room?”

Lucille looked down. “It's not like we...never did this. So...” If someone heard this, she would probably need to deal with rumors he wouldn't like to hear at all. Not because it bothered her but because she would get so embarrassed that she might get red and run away if someone told her.

Cedar let out a snort at that. “You are too careless. But as long as you only do this with me, it's fine.” He walked the few steps around the bed and sat down on the other side. He glanced at the clock and then at her. “Do you want to sleep already? I mean, you are wearing your nightgown. It's late, but I don't know whether you wish to lay down now.”

She wasn't sure either. After all, she was rather excited at the moment. But she knew that Cedar had had a stressful fight, so she would like to let him rest. “Yes. I'm tired.”

“Alright.” Cedar took off his shoes and moved more to the middle of the bed to lie down and pulled the covers over him. Like this, he didn't seem intimidating at all. More like a kind man who was waiting for his wife to join him in bed. Almost as if they were in a domestic setting as spouses who had been married for a long time.

Lucille pushed that thought away as quickly as she could. She lay down as well and pulled the other side of the blanket over her. Unsurprisingly, it was too short, so she didn't get much of the blanket. That only meant one thing though.

An excuse for her to come a bit closer.

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She had barely begun to shuffle around when Cedar already put an arm around her and pulled her against him. “You need to cover your body overnight, or you will get sick. We can't risk that. We need all the warmth we can get.”

Lucille shouldn't need to worry about warmth. Her whole body was burning when she was so close to him. But she didn't say that. “Of course.” She didn't suggest getting another blanket either and just cuddled herself against him. Being in Cedar's embrace made it feel like all of her worries were ebbing away despite nothing happening. She felt so safe here that she almost couldn't believe that all of this was just because of him. But it didn't take her long to remember how exactly she felt about him. She had fallen in love.

That night, they fell asleep in each other's arms. And once again, Lucille felt like she was the luckiest girl in this world.

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A few days passed, but Lucille barely heard anything about the attack. Cedar had explained what had happened and how they would prevent such attempts in the future, but that had been it. She had been worried about him despite that. The fact that he treated an assassination attempt like nothing had happened only made her assume the worst.

But aside from a few people, none of the staff members had noticed anything, so the atmosphere in the palace was as chipper as always. Merely the guards' increased caution revealed that someone was going on.

But even so, Blanche and her maids were chattering as happily as always.

The empress was currently in the middle of making another cake. She was in a good mood today, so she didn't even care that all the knives had been taken away from her because she had cut her finger. “The contract is finally finished. Even the supreme judge agreed to place his signature on it. This means that Theo officially put his mother's name into the register of the royal family. Althea is now known as the former emperor's second wife. Theo will change that title once more in the near future, but this is satisfying already.” She happily stirred her cream while explaining that.

Lucille vaguely remembered hearing about that. She didn't say anything and just focused on creating the small decorations for the cake. She was currently building roses out of marzipan and food coloring. She was doing a good job, at least she would say that, and didn't want to mess up. So, she didn't dare to look away even when the others happily talked.

Darlene was the one who added the next comment. “We're all happy that she finally got that position. It's also good to hear that His Majesty sometimes concerns himself with pleasant matters instead of interrogating criminals or destroying our enemies' businesses. It's important that he does all that, but he should also focus on the pleasant sides of life.”

Blanche laughed at that. “He spends most of his time with Aurora and me. I would claim that we are very pleasant. I wish I could help him more though.”

Stella chimed in while trying to cut some strawberries in the form of a flower. “You are helping him. You let the servants bring you some contracts and deal with them. Aside from that, His Royal Highness helps as well, so the little work the ministers don't take care of is being managed by four people now. Of course, it would be much faster like this. What you need to deal with is something completely different. My Lady, you will have to start planning the tea party. It's supposed to happen in two weeks.”

The empress let out an exaggerated sigh. “I know. But I don't want to do it. It will be boring. Of course, it might be a bit more pleasant if I bring my angel with me since Sophia and Duchess Vasquez will bring their daughters too. Still, they will all talk about the gossip in the capital.” This was the main reason why that tea party was held.

Once a year, the empress would invite the noble ladies of the capital for a meeting in the afternoon. Then everyone would exchange their past experiences and talk about a lot of unnecessary things. Lucille had always hated that party too. She had bad memories of sitting there in silence while trying to ignore how everyone gossiped about other people without holding back. Two years ago, she had even troubled Blanche during one of these parties, just because her father had told her to do it. Now things were much different, but that event still wouldn't be pleasant. At least no one here looked forward to it.

Blanche was busy putting the cream onto the first part of the cake, but she still complained. “I don't want to listen to how someone saw someone else in an unpleasant part of the city. Nor do I need to hear what someone's husband gifted his wife. I will gladly talk about my daughter, listen to stories about other people's children and say that all engagements and marriages are good matches. But everything else is so boring that it will make me fall asleep. I will just play with Aurora when it gets too bad. But I won't let anyone touch her. Unless it's Sophia. However, that woman will not put her dirty hands anywhere near my child.” She had looked like she was slightly annoyed in the beginning, and in the end, she glared into the distance. This was obviously about Camille, which Lucille could very much understand.

No sane person would give the dowager empress a child. That woman had traumatized her own sons enough, so she would only be more cruel to people who weren't related to her. It seemed like everyone here agreed.

The maids began complaining about the dowager empress so loudly that Blanche had to silence them. She didn't succeed completely, so the empress decided to change the topic. She turned around and made eye contact with Lucille. “I might be forced to feed Aurora during the tea party. I need someone to host it in the meantime. Naturally, I will not ask the dowager empress. Would you mind taking care of that?”

Hosting the tea party was the responsibility of the empress. If she left for a short moment, another member of the royal family should deal with it. Unfortunately, there was no female relative of the Estiens here, unless one counted the insufferable Camille. Then the most important ally of the emperor should do it. That was Duchess Duremont and certainly not a viscount's daughter.

Lucille froze in place. She almost dropped the marzipan rose she had been working on and barely dared to lift her head. “What? Me? But that's not...”

Blanche showed her a bright smile. “I will not force you. The other option would be to ask Sophia or Duchess Duremont. But you are currently living in the palace, so you are technically not a guest anymore and could be a host. Besides, you and Cedar managed to host the last ball. During the tea party, you don't even need to walk around to talk. You merely need to sit and wait for the others to gossip. If it's quiet, you only need to ask someone to tell you something new. That's it. If a problem arises, you can just tell them to wait for ten minutes until I'm back.”

This wasn't comparable to the ball. Back then, Lucille had hosted the party indirectly because she had accompanied Cedar, who had been the one that was responsible for the guests. Now she was supposed to do this alone with no legitimization of any sort. Horror rose inside her and made her stomach churn as she hurried to explain her reasoning. “But I don't have the necessary confidence. I can't begin conversations or make people listen to me. Cedar is always so...strong in front of others. But I'm just standing there while trying to blend into the background.”

Blanche nodded at that while putting down her utensils. “I understand. Do you know that I tried that too? I did my best to be invisible for at least ten months. It didn't really work with Theodore putting me onto a pedestal. It won't work with you and Cedar being together either. If you consider becoming a member of the royal family, you will have to get used to others staring at you. You can be confident. No one can trouble you without beginning a fight with the royal family.”

It felt like all air was pushed out of Lucille's lungs. She didn't dare to move while she stared at the empress in disbelief. Did it seem like she would marry Cedar soon? Surely, they had discussed that option, but this moved a bit quickly. After all, announcing an engagement with the royal family was pretty much binding. Lucille's mouth fell open, and she stammered around a little. Then she shut it again.

Blanche took a few seconds to see that she had messed up. She began grinning and focused on her cake again. “Really? You are still in that phase? You met seven...almost eight months ago. And you have lived here for over half a year now. You do realize that, right? If Cedar was with you for so long, he is absolutely enamored. He would have lost interest otherwise. It's a miracle he didn't propose yet.”

Indirectly, Cedar might already have proposed.

Lucille didn't dare to say that and quickly averted her eyes. “We're...in an odd relationship right now. We're friends and maybe something else too, but we didn't...” They hadn't specified anything yet. After all, Cedar had wanted to give them time since they were rather young.

Blanche paused for a moment before giving her response. “I'm rather useless in that regard. Theodore and I were a couple after two weeks. That day, he gave me my first kiss, and we both lost all rational thought.”

Lucille had heard about that a few times. That still sounded like it had happened awfully quickly. Cedar had first kissed her after they had known each other for half a year. There was a big difference between that and two weeks. Lucille had still been completely overwhelmed, even though she had known Cedar for so long at that point. But she had to admit that she might have allowed him to kiss her after two weeks already if he had tried it. She quickly pushed that thought away and focused on the conversation again. She lifted her head to look at the empress and carefully voiced her question. “How did the two of you confirm that you are a couple?” That was what she wanted to know. Because her relationship with Cedar had a strange label right now. They hadn't said that they were a couple, but they weren't solely friends anymore either. They even considered marriage.

Blanche beamed when she remembered that and replied in a chirpy tone. “Like I said, we kissed. Twice. That was in the pavilion, and after that, we were officially a couple. We told each other that we liked one another before too, but that was the point at which we could be sure that we were together. Afterward, everything went slower, but we skipped the first parts and went from holding hands to being in a relationship.”

Lucille swallowed at that. She had told Cedar that she liked him too. He had said it back. They had kissed twice already as well. Did this mean that she could seriously consider him her lover? They had discussed an engagement, so this wouldn't be that surprising. It only took two seconds before she noticed that her reaction had been too obvious.

The other women grinned at her. Darlene was the one who commented first. “Let me guess. If you apply that rule, you and His Royal Highness are already together too, right?”

Lucille cast her gaze downwards. She couldn't just assume that this was the case. She would need to ask Cedar to be sure. But she would die out of embarrassment if she did that. After all, even the maids' remarks already made her want to become invisible.

Stella made it even worse by humming in acknowledgment. “I heard that he spent the night in her room already too. How brazen such couples are. Young love is so cute.” She sighed. “It reminds me of His and Her Majesty. I'm glad that we are finally seeing romances here in the palace. It was getting boring before My Lady came here.” After that, the conversation seemed to move along.

But still, the maids and the empress seemed to like reminding Lucille of the fact that she was blushing and probably thinking about Cedar. She didn't even deny it and just averted her eyes. After all, they were right. They were right about almost everything they said, even about Cedar already sleeping in her bed.

So, maybe it would be better to keep quiet about the fact that Cedar would spend the night in her room today again.