[https://i.imgur.com/WUqlbhw.gif]
CHAPTER 25: DARA, PEOPLE DIE OF SWINE FLU!
*ting*
Congratulation!
You have successfully bounded [Black Undead Goat] to you as a [Blood & Soul Familiar].
2/3 familiar slots used.
Name your new familiar.
I do a little victory dance and repress a squeal of glee. It worked! Nothing exploded! And no one died! Whoop-whoop! Who’s your daddy? Hey! Hey! Hey!
*ting*
Hey?
Do you confirm “Who’s your daddy hey hey” as the name of familiar [Black Undead Goat]?
What? Oh, nonononono. The name is Appleseed.
*ting*
Do you confirm “Appleseed” as the name of familiar [Black Undead Goat]?
Yes.
Hahahahahahahaha.
Shut up.
I dismiss the confirmation the name was accepted and I scratch the head of the black undead creature, now officially Appleseed, who has exited the now inert ritual circle and head-butted me gently to ask for my attention. Hehehe. Spoiled brat. She already loves me.
“Aaaaaapple.”
“……”
…pfffft.
Oh, shut up.
Ignoring the ungrateful beast, I check my status to verify how much mana she’s draining from me. Indeed, a small portion of my mana, about 2%, is cut off from my use and dedicated to keeping Appleseed sane.
By the way, Toto didn’t require any to keep himself from degenerating, but that makes sense. A [Soul Dragon] is already a stable existence, a force of nature and magic which transitioned from physical to spirit form at the death of his mortal body—although, I don’t know how he ended stuck in a soulgem—whereas a raised undead like Appleseed is more a patchwork creature and an abomination against nature.
I scratch Appleseed behind her horns and she makes… err… happy… goat… noises? I think. Well, she looks like she’s enjoying it. Aw~ Look at how she’s showing her sharp meat-shredding fangs in happiness. “Ooooh, that’s right. Who’s a good abomination against nature?” I coo. “Hmmmm? Who’s a good eldritch horror of dark magic? That’s right. Yes, that’s you.”
“…Aaaaaaapple.”
...sigh.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. Tsk. You gluttonous eldritch horror. You’re lucky you’re cute.” I roll my eyes and turn around. “Thena, could you—Thena?” I stop and tilt my head, then I cross my arms and sigh in exasperation. “Thena. What are you doing?”
“Taking the logical course of action.”
I raise an eyebrow at the seven-foot-tall orcish woman, who is peeking cautiously at me from behind her tower shield several yards away. I spot a blond head behind her and a vein twitches in my forehead. “And Ambrose. You’re a ghost. What do you think could happen to you?!”
The princely elder stands up from his crouch behind Thena and her shield. He coughs lightly in his balled fist. “From a misfiring ritual of Soul Magic? Plenty could happen, and I have had enough of being cursed once by accident. I do not feel eager for a repeat.”
I roll my eyes. “I had it under control.”
They both level blank gazes at me.
““……””
I groan through gritted teeth and throw both hands up with annoyance. “Is there nobody here who trusts my abilities?!”
““……””
“Ughhh!!!” I turn to Toto, who’s still on Thena’s shoulder. “I fixed you, didn’t I?” The little puppy huffs haughtily and turns away. Ugh. Why was I hoping anything from that possessed furball? I look down at Appleseed. “And you. You believe in me, don’t you?”
The undead animal stares at me for two seconds with her solid red eyes, and I dare hope, but then she opens a large maw. “AAAAAAAAAPPLE!!!”
My heads and shoulders drop. “………Thena has them.” I point at the semi-orc without looking up. I would orz, but I fear I wouldn’t get back up under the weight of crushing depression.
Meanwhile, the unfaithful goat trots away, towards the armoured woman. I glance up and look her go. Silly anger bubbles inside me. I straighten and shake an angry fist at the undead animal. “Traitor!! You—ahhhh… What’s the point?” I sigh loudly, my shoulder dropping again.
You could just order her around, you know? She is our bonded familiar, after all, and her soul is nowhere as strong as Toto’s.
I’m not that kind of master.
We’ll see.
Yeah, yeah. Sure. Whatever.
With another sigh, I turn to Ambrose. “You said there was another reason you came to us?”
“Oh, I already discussed it with your companion. She agreed to help me out.”
I blink. “Wait, what? What?! Thena??” My head snaps to my “partner”.
She shrugs. “He did. We should get going.”
“This feels very rushed! AND WHY IS EVERYONE BACKSTABBING ME?!?! I’m supposed to be the quirky but loveable member of this group!”
You’re more of a bad comic relief.
Nobody asked you for a running commentary!
You’re more a Peridot than an Amethyst or a Pearl, if you ask me.
“What does it have to do with anything?!”
“Stop making a scene,” Thena interjects sternly before I can voice my disbelief further in a more over-the-top fashion. “Who are you talking to anyway?” She shakes her. “Never mind. Let’s go. I have no intention of staying in this cursed country any more than I need to.” She glances at Ambrose. “But might as well turn try to make this not a total loss.” The old ghost nods. Athena tosses an apple at Appleseed, then she steps up to me and picks me up by the back of my leather outfit.
“I am not a kitten!!” I protest loudly. Though, at the back of my head, I can’t help but find the way she’s nonchalantly taking charge kind of hot.
*cough*masochist*cough*
“I’m more of an admirer of strong women,” I mumble.
“Silence.” Thena drops me on Appleseed’s back.
For some reason, there’s something about her tone that annoys me. I don’t get the same funny feeling as when she usually orders me around.
*cough*mas—
Don’t even think about finishing that thought.
How does that even work?
“Just shut up!”
“NO. YOU SHUT UP!!” Thena’s roar takes me completely by surprise. I look at her, stunned, and she’s glaring angrily at me. The heck? I know she’s always a time bomb waiting to go off, but usually there are signs. She doesn’t just blow off for no reason.
The shock wears off and I bristled instead. I narrow my eyes at her. “Why do you keep telling me to shut up?! I told you, undead can’t. hear. sounds! The smarter ones can interpret the intentions of nearby souls and create a pretty convincing illusion of oral communication, but in truth it’s not strictly sound-based. What would really attract undead here would be—oh.” Cold sweats suddenly pour down my back and my exposition rant ends prematurely.
Thena shots me an unkind glance. “What?”
“Err…” I scratch my head awkwardly, my brief spike of anger vanishing already. “Hehehe. What would attract undead here would be… a strong output of… Soul Magic?” I almost squeak that last part. Both our gazes move to the remaining traces of the ritual.
“……”
“……”
“Vicky.”
I gulp at her emotionless utterance of my name. Like many irascible persons, it’s when her anger burns cold that she’s truly enraged. “…ye-yes?”
“I’m seriously considering ditching you and finding my way out of this country by myself right now.”
“Please don’t.”
“Then stop putting my life in danger. Having you as a guide is pointless if you’re going to get me killed anyway. It would be easier to kill myself and respawn later somewhere I know.”
“Ah. But then you wouldn’t get to enjoy my charming company.” I raise a pointed finger and smile tentatively at her, but upon meeting her eyes shining with barely repressed wrathful violence, I lower my head… and my finger. Had I possessed animal ears, they would be dropped too. Would that bring up my cute factor and grant me more leniency? Probably not. She seems really pissed right now for… reasons? I can’t read her when she gets like this. “I understand.”
She nods slowly, deliberately. “See that you do.” She turns away and I can finally breathe. “Ambrose, we—huh? Where is he?”
“What? He was there just now…” I look around too, but the annoying spectre is nowhere to be seen. He’s even disappeared from my [Soul Sense]. I frown. “Where did that guy—?” I stop suddenly. Something has entered my extrasensory range. Something dead yet moving. That soul doesn’t feel like Ambrose, but it is too powerful to be a simple [Zombie]. It’s also too fast for one and… it’s heading straight in our direction.
When a second presence equally strong appears, my mouth dries up.
This might become a problem.
Might.
What to do? Those things feel dangerous.
We could… err… UGH!! Acting with care for our safety is soooooo annoying! Let’s just blast the fuckers!
I scoff mentally. With what?! I only have access to beginner magic right now!
That’s true, dammit! Bloody fucking bullshit curse @?*&%!!!
I tune out my inner voice’s increasingly exotic cursing and call out to my real companion. “Thena! We have a problem!”
She groans and exhales. “Tell me something I don’t know. Alright. What prob—” I see her stiffen. “Oh, fuck.” So she sensed them too. Her [Soul Sense] is as good as mine, after all, if shorter in range. Now what?
“Don’t fall behind,” she orders and, without as much as another glance at me, she takes off into a fast jog in the direction opposite to our still-unseen attackers.
“Hey! Don’t just run o—”
“Aaaaapple!!”
“Whoa!!” I nearly fall when Appleseed suddenly leaps forwards after Thena, but I hold to her horns and in no time we’ve caught up. “Where are we going exactly?” I ask.
“Away from those things! I don’t know what they are, but I can’t fight them and protect you at the same time.”
Aw~. Even when she’s pissed, she’s worried about you.
She’s worried about her guide…
You’re sulking.
No, I’m not.
You are.
Am not.
To change that line of thoughts, I turn around—an advantage of riding a mount that doesn’t need directions—and try to pierce the darkness with my [Darkvision]. After a couple seconds, I catch a glimpse of big lumps of dark metal wading through the woods. “Oh, fuck,” I echo Thena’s previous words.
“What?” The semi-orcs turns around and almost runs into a tree upon my uncharacteristic swearing. She avoids it at the last second.
“Death Knights. Four, no five… six… eight—Dagnammit!” The tall black armours are each as massive as Thena, if not more, and they keep increasing in numbers. My [Soul Sense] picks up more presences even as I count them, including one soul that feels much different to the knights’ and honestly gives me a very, very bad feeling. “We’re in deep caca! This is a whole squad of [Death Knights]! And I think someone or something is directly giving them orders.” That would be that strange presence I’m feeling. At the moment, it’s staying at the back of the pack and the knights are repositioning themselves in formation in front of it. “We won’t be able to simply outrun them.”
“Well, we can’t fight against those numbers,” Athena drops.
“Oh, we can fight,” I counter, deadpan. “It’s the ‘not losing and dying a gruesome death’ that’s going to be a problem.”
“Vicky! This is no time for your stupid wordplays!” Thena takes a moment to shot me a scathing glare before jumping over a root with surprising nimbleness for a seven-foot-tall woman clad in heavy metal armour.
I shrug and reaffirm my grip on Appleseed’s horns. Bareback goat riding isn’t as smooth as one might imagine—surprising, I know. And, honestly, I’m out of practice. “I’d argue that moments of stress are the very best to relax the atmosphere.”
“Well, it’s not relaxing me!!”
In your defence, I think nothing short of a bucket of morphine would make her relax right now. That stick climbed way upper in her ass than usual.
Thank you. But she’s so stubborn, she might refuse to let even morphine affect her. “Well, the good news is that [Death Knights] might be faster than [Zombies] but they’re not too fast. We have some time before they catch up to figure out a strategy.” I try to be practical and think logically.
That’s so weird.
Yeah…
*shiver*
It’s not natural, I tell you.
“A strategy…” Thena scans the dark woods, though she likely can’t see any further than I do. “What is there in this part of the forest?”
“Here? Well, as far as I’m aware, there should be only Kansas and the river encircling this whole region.”
“A circular river?”
“Welcome to Erwyn,” I throw back with heavy sarcasm.
She seems briefly taken aback but quickly gets over it. “Can that river stop them? Are undead able to cross running water?”
“Ah, that old superstition. No, running water doesn’t stop undead. Most can’t swim, true, but as long as the current isn’t too strong, they’ll just walk at the bottom. Well, this particular river is… It would certainly slow them down, but that only helps us if we can cross it ourselves.” I cast a glance back to check on our pursuers, even though I don’t really need to. I can feel the dead warriors through my magic senses. It’s like an itch in their direction that grows into intensity as they get near. But I like to get visual confirmation.
Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.
Rule 37: “Never trust anything in a world where magic is possible.”
Ambient magic can mess your senses, physical or otherwise, therefore it’s always best to have as many confirmations as possible that what you see is real and correct.
“Isn’t there a way to cross it?”
“Well, there is a bridge… but…”
“But what?!” She’s getting impatient.
“It’s in the other direction.” I point behind us, straight at the [Death Knights]. “I guess we could reach it if we make a complete circle, but that would mean going around the whole Nowhere mesa…”
“Great,” she snarls. “Do you ever have any idea that’s actually helpful?!”
What?! “Well, soooorry if I don’t have a miracle way to get rid of twenty upper ranked undead and their master!!” I snarl back, covering with anger the pang of hurt at her mean rebuke.
What is her problem? I’m actually trying to make plans for once! Does she have any idea how troublesome that is?! My head hurts! If it were the old me, I’d have confronted those suckers and to Hell with consequences! Here, not only am I weak as fuck, I also am trying not to die to stay with your sorry ass!
But what a nice ass.
Exactly!—Wait. That’s not the point! …What was I saying again? Oh, fuck it.
Wow. You are pissed.
I fucking am! This girl needs to pull that stick out of her ass, no matter how nice it looks!
So you admit—
Shut the fuck up!
…But, yeah, I do.
And, I mean, I don’t even mind being blamed and beaten for things that are actually my fault. What I don’t appreciate is her pissy attitude when I’m actually trying to help! Sure, it’s partially my fault they found us, but how could a have known there was a whole bloody squad of these rotten Alphonse knock-off laying in ambush nearby—
Wait.
What.
The army of zombies, the Death Knights, the knights’ mysterious commander…
Fu-Bleep! This was an ambush!
Best bet.
I bite into my thumb, thinking. Given where they came from, the undead knights were waiting for us on the way to the bridge. There is a single path leading from Kansas to that bridge and it is the only bridge as far as I know.
So they knew we were there.
Well, that in itself isn’t too hard to find out. We’ve been staying in Kansas for a while. But why didn’t they attack Kansas right away? [Death Knights] wouldn’t have had any trouble breaking through the depowered magic fence.
Maybe they just arrived.
And they used the zombies already present in the area to slow us down?
Sounds plausible.
But to control such a large amount of undead from far away, you’d need a lich or something equally powerful.
Not to mention giving orders to a bunch of [Death Knights].
I focus on that presence at the back of the undead group. Could that be a lich?
Could be. Or something else. Remember that [Damned Revenant Lord] a while back.
Oh, yeah, that thing. Well, I can’t tell from [Soul Sense] alone. I need visual contact.
One thing is sure, though, that thing is powerful, more powerful than we can handle with our present group. Maybe without the [Death Knights], but even then I would only bet safely on a fighting retreat. No point in dying for no reason, and being ripped to shred by a band of undead wouldn’t even be fun.
Been there, done that.
I take a decision. For some reason, Thena is being a grump, so I’ll have to somehow get us out of this mess.
I look up at the semi-orc, or rather, her shoulder. “Toto! Burn the forest behind us. I’ll give you a hand. Use my mana.” The dragon-puppy can sustain his own existence and sanity, unlike Appleseed, but nevertheless, his supply of energy isn’t unlimited. He may be an ancient dragon, but he only has access to the mana his soulstone can contain, which was mostly used up during our previous escape. But I can supply him more through the familiar bond.
I have no idea how well soul flames will burn supposedly soulless trees, or if they’ll retain their magical properties once transferred to another support. [Zombies] burnt well enough, but maybe the magic flame was feeding on the dark power animating them. On the other hand, everything in this cursed country is engorged with dark magic, so maybe it’ll work. If it does, the flames can shield our mana signatures enough for us to try and loose them.
I feel like I’m forgetting something though…
…
……
………meh. I’m sure it’s nothing important.
“What—” Thena starts.
“Not now, Thena. I need to focus.”
She snaps her mouth shut, but I can almost feel the annoyance radiating from her. For once, I don’t care. I need all my concentration to multitask between riding and planning, and I originally am this kind of insensitive person anyway.
Okay. Here we go.
Like twisting an immaterial valve, I open the channel between me and my first familiar. Immediately my mana pours into the dragon like a glass of water trying to fill a sea and I feel lightheaded. Oh, hell. “Toto, don’t take too much! Not everyone is an elder dragon!” The tiny creature snorts in disdain but complies. The irresponsible syphon reduces to a more reasonable drain just before a controlled jet of blue fire lights up the dark forest. Even without risk to myself, the stone-melting heat of the condensed dragon soulfire sends shivers down my spine.
Shivers of excitement of course.
The result is even better than I expected. The tree burst into flames as if they’d been coated in gasoline, and so does the thick layer of humus on the ground. I think my theory about soulfire feeding off necromantic magic might hold more truth than I initially thought. A wall of flames jumps upwards between us and our pursuers. My own [Soul Sense] gets completely muddled, which is unfortunate, but hopefully that means I was right and they also lost “sight” of us.
“Thena! Turn left!” This time, she obeys without question. She’s smart—even if she’s annoying sometimes. She surely figured out my plan the instant her own [Soul Sense] stopped functioning. I myself direct Appleseed in that direction and I don’t have to ask for the undead goat to nearly double her speed. I think she’s scared of the fire behind us… fire which is rapidly gaining on us.
…Ah. I remember what I’d forgotten now.
Oh, dear.
I manage a strained smile. “Err… Toto. You can… control those flames, can’t you?” Even with his limited facial expressions, the puppy sends me a deadpan look that is clearly asking at what level of brain degeneration I am.
Right.
So… did I just start a magical forest fire that feeds on necrotic magic in a country saturated with that very necrotic magic?
Am I an idiot?
I could answer, but…
Please don’t.
Reminds me of that time with the World Tree.
Ah. Yes. That. You think the elves are still mad at me?
For burning down their living god?
…right. Stupid question.
Remember rule 88?
Of course: Tree burns. Even millennia old, supposedly indestructible magical sacred trees. Be careful about—oh.
Yep.
Darn it.
And to answer your stupid question, last time I heard, your bounty had doubled again. You should be proud, it’s exploded the previous record for highest bounty ever, previously held by… oh, right. You.
Ugh. It was an accident, I swear!
Go tell that to the Elven Council.
I can’t!
Oh, right. That matter with the Grand Councillor’s great-great-great-granddaughter. He’s still pretty mad about that, isn’t he?
Please don’t remind me. To this day, I can’t eat cabbage soup without having flashbacks.
She was pretty ruthless with that spoon.
*shiver*
A wave of heat washes over us, causing Appleseed to bleat in anguish and increase her pace further. Thena curses loudly, at me I think—I believe no one else here deserves the title “stupid albino lunatic”—and she strains to catch up.
A thought suddenly strikes me. “Hey, Thena, what was that thing Ambrose wanted?! Can we use it to get away?!”
She glares but quickly turns back forwards. She still answers. “He wanted us to kill a monster in a nearby dungeon and get some sort of gem from it.”
“A gem—no. Never mind. How nearby? Do you know the direction of the dungeon entrance? Maybe we can lose them inside. I don’t know how much the fire will hinder them.” As if to answer me, a loud crack of super-heated wood echoes behind us.
“You want to run into more monsters?!” she shouts, disbelieving.
“Do you have a better plan?!” I shot back.
“Your plans end up is us being either burned alive or eaten!”
Ouch. Burned. Pun intended.
“Is this really the time to argue?!”
“Tsk.” She clicks her tongue and mumbles something under her breath.
“What?”
“…He talked about a cave in a cliff to the North-East, about two hours walk from where we were.” Well, good news, we are currently running North-North-East. If the dungeon is on this side of the river, we might yet run into it…literally. And, two hours, that can’t be more than what’s needed to get to the river, based on my estimations.
A series of inhuman wails from the blue inferno creeping behind us reminds me of our pursuers. I have no idea how close or how far they are right now. They could be just on our tails, and I wouldn’t be the wiser. Darn. Whose bright idea was it to light the forest on fire again?
I cast a quick glance behind, but all I see are burning trees, burning bushes, and more burning stuff. One giant tree falls in a loud creak, its burning branches leaving after-images in my retinas.
…
……
………
Meh, it should be alright.
And, if my sense of directions isn’t betraying me right now…
“WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!” Just as was pondering on the trajectory of our mad run, Thena skids to a halt and shouts in surprise.
Like clockwork.
I pull on Appleseed’s horns to bring her to a stop. “Yep. That’s the [River of Lost Souls] alright. As creepy as ever.” I can’t blame Thena for her reaction. The river surrounding the Nowhere Mountain, and by extension the Kansas area, is one of the foulest landmarks I’ve ever had the displeasure to contemplate in my life.
Instead of the expected water, the riverbed is filled with a soup of soundlessly moaning milky-white spectres, a viscous broth of translucent limbs reaching out like half-melted people drowning in liquid glue and trying to escape. There are faces in the mix, wailing mutely, their eyes and gaping mouths filled with bubbling tar.
This is about what I imagine the River Styx would be depicted by a depressed madman with a love for the grotesque. The flux of tormented souls is also flowing up the slope of the ground, as if the souls were so angry at the world that they didn’t even want to humour gravity.
On a side note, though, in all honesty, I have yet to come to any definite conclusion as to the effects of gravity on incorporeal beings. Most humanoid spectres appear standing upright, but that could just be peer pressure. You don’t want to be the only one with your feet up and your head near the floor. That’d be just silly.
Another series of loud cries break the silence, closer this time. “We shouldn’t just stand here,” I remind Thena, who’s still staring at the river with a disgusted grimace. Is she alright? She isn’t that distracted normally.
“Right.” She nods, and my question dies on my lips. She might get pissed if I ask about her well-being. She’d think I insinuate she’s weak. That’s a very touchy subject for her.
We both take off downstream… meaning up the slope… meaning in the same direction as the souls… err…
Well, we are running in the opposite direction as the still-spreading forest fire. Appleseed seems especially adamant on putting as much distance between her and the soul flames as possible. Incidentally, we are now darting eastwards alongside the river.
I really hope that dungeon entrance is on this side.
I keep shooting glances back to see if our undead pursuers are still behind us, but all I see is an increasingly wild expanse of blue flames.
What a mess…
It’s been a while since we caused such widespread destruction, isn’t it?
Please don’t say it so wistfully!
Do you think, if the river wasn’t surrounding this whole region, the whole country would have turned into a sea of fire?
Stop that.
Victoria Sangbleu, back to her kingdom after two millennia. First action: burns it to the ground.
“Yessss… burn them… burn all of them… traitors... piss on their ashes… scatter them in shitholes…”
Stop that, both of you!!
I mean, I don’t think it would come to that. The fire didn’t spread when we were in the Kansan clearing. Maybe grass isn’t enough. It would stop as soon as it reaches the plains beyond the woods.
That’s still a lot of woods. Plus, that clearing wasn’t affected by the Grand Curse until last month. The necromantic power must still be thinner there.
Ugh… Whatever. There’s no point mulling over hypothetical disaster scenarios, since the soulfire is not spreading to the “waters” of the river. Thank the gods.
I wonder why that is, though.
Maybe the soulfire does need a physical support after all?
……The logic behind this magical soul-burning flames that won’t burn disembodied souls escapes me.
Well, no matter.
* * *
After running on the river bank for a while, we reach a lake. It seems to be the final destination of the corrupted river. I wince, both because of the sight and smell. The foul stench of stale decay is everywhere, rising from the foul body of spiritual plasma. At the centre of the lake, the souls are being sucked into a huge whirlpool.
It looks like an evil toilet being flushed.
……You have no sense of gravity, do you?
Nope.
I look around. The coast of the lake is free of trees and grass for about fifty yards, so we should be safe from the flames. Should.
Past the lake, the forest abruptly stops, as does the ground, giving way to sky. I suddenly realise we are at the top of a cliff. It made sense, though, since we’ve been climbing up all this time.
I direct Appleseed around the lake and closer to the edge. I dismount and, lying on the ground, I prudently peek over the edge.
We’re really high. I have to fight the urge to jump. It’s kind of a reflex for me, jumping off cliffs. A bad reflex… maybe. It’s fun, though potentially lethal. Well, it is night right now, so I could just turn into a bat and fly back up. But I don’t want to risk increasing my bloodthirst. I’m way past simply “peckish” now, and I’ve noticed before my Thirst worsens faster when I use my purely vampiric abilities.
I lick my fangs in ponder, something that’s become sort of a tick in the past weeks.
Something catches my eye. “I see the entrance of the cave!” I call back towards Thena. At the bottom of the cliff, there is a large jagged opening like a maw of stone. From between the bottom “teeth” comes out the [River of Lost Souls]. Its sickly glow is what allows me to clearly see the cave all the way down. The river then goes of snaking through the forest.
I lean further and look south. Oddly, I can’t see Nowhere Mountain, or whatever it is called. That gigantic glowing piece of rock should be visible for miles around in the eternal night plaguing Erwyn. However, I suppose it was initially the location of Erwyn’s royal family’s secret castle, and it wouldn’t make for a very good hideaway if the place was visible halfway across the country every night.
“How do we get down there?”
Words break my pondering. I look up and my eyes widen. Thena is standing at the edge of the cliff, towering above me and uncaring of the long fall mere inches away from her. The changing blue flames burning the forest lights her from behind. Thunder and lightning explode in the sky above her.
I think I forgot to breathe.
.
.
.
God, that pose is sooooooo epic!
It’s unfair! So unfair!! How does she get to be so cool without even trying! I’m jealous! I’m too jealous! UUUUUUUUGH—Quick! Screenshot.
Done.
Ahhh... I feel better.
This one is going directly to my [Thena being casually awesome] folder.
“Vicky?” Thena’s eyes turn to me, shining gold in the dark shadows cast on her face.
And that’s another screenshot.
*cough*stalker*cough*
It’s not stalking if she’s okay with me being there.
Technicalities.
“Vicky?”
I blink. “Whah? Oh, yes. Down. Err…” I smile. “We could jum…” Her eyes narrow. My smile turns stained. “Maybe not,” I concede. “I can fly down and you’ll climb with Toto and Appleseed?” I nod at the pair, several feet behind. The dragon puppy moved to Appleseed’s back at some point. Sometime before Thena walked to the edge of the cliff, I guess, because I didn’t see him when I took those screenshots just now.
Is he afraid of heights or something?
Of course not. He’s a dragon. That’d be just silly.
Thena shakes her head. “That won’t work. I can’t defend myself or others while climbing. And if you’re right, those undead knights will catch up before we reach the bottom. I’d rather not suffer attacks from above while out in the open and hanging from a cliff.”
“Right. Nobody likes cliff-hangers.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Err… What about throwing at least Appleseed down the cliff? She might survive the fall, and if not, I should be able to resummon her once down.”
“AAAAAAAPPLE!!!” a certain goat bleats loudly in protest.
What are you, a Pokémon? I know you can say other words.
“I don’t think it’ll work,” Thena shakes her head. “Ambrose told me the boss monster in the dungeon drags all the disembodied souls of the area to feed on them. Appleseed would be consumed before you can put her back together.” She looks back. “And… I guess that ‘river’ is linked to the monster somehow.”
I follow her gaze to the whirlpool. Hmm… I wonder…
I shake my head. Focus. One problem at a time. “Well, then we can try this way.” I point to our left. There’s a narrow strip of land between the shore of the lake and the edge of the cliff. It’s really narrow, with void on one side and a broth of spectres of unknown properties on the other, but we can use it to reach the other shore, if we’re careful about it. “Maybe there’s a way down that way. And that part of the forest is not on fire. That’s a definite plus.”
“I guess we don’t have much of a choice,” Thena sighs, irritated, then stalks past me and towards the stripe. “That’s why I hate being unprepared.” She whispers that last part, but my heighten senses pick it up nonetheless.
Aw, poor girl. Doesn’t she know that improvisation is half the fun?
Only half?
The other half is unexpectedness, also called “failed plans”.
Point being, plans are useless.
Precisely.
“VICKY!! GET MOVING!!”
“Yes, yes!” I shout back, then add under my breath, “Seriously. Unwind a bit.”
“VICKY!!!”
“OKAY!! Geez.” I get back on my feet and dust my outfit. As I’m about to follow Thena, however, a shiver runs down my spine and I spin around to face the burning forest. “Tsk.” I narrow my eyes at the blue flames. “All this, and it barely even slowed them.”
Suddenly, a large sphere of opaque blackness the size of a small house exits the woods. The soulfire licks its sides harmlessly. Clearly, a shield of some sort. As soon as the sphere clears the three, it starts shrinking, flowing inwards past twenty unscathed [Death Knights] standing in battle formation. I hear Thena swear loudly behind me and her loud steps rushing to come back standing between me and the threat.
I peek around her broad frame, my gaze zeroing in on the figure standing at the centre of the undead group. The being is wearing a black monk cloak that hides all their features. Even their face under the hood is shrouded in unnatural darkness. The miniaturised black sphere hovers above their raised left sleeve for an instant before seemingly merging with the cloth.
…
Okay, I’ll admit. That was a pretty cool entrance.
The hidden face of the creature turns in my direction. I can’t distinguish anything under that hood, but I’m somehow convinced I’m being stared at fixedly. It’s slightly unnerving.
The being speaks. “You… cannot… run.” Their voice is deep, gravelly, like rocks rubbing against each other, and the words come out slowly, painfully enunciated. It sounds like but a whisper, and yet each syllable is perfectly audible above even the roar of fire and he muffled explosions of thunder. There is something ethereal and unnerving about that voice. “You… cannot… run… Princess…” Whips of darkness flew from under the hood, like a breath exhaled in the cold, but far more ominous. “Surrender.”
“Ah, no. I’m sorry. I’m Princess Victoria. You’ve got the wrong person. Princess Surrender went that way.” I point a random direction back where we came from.
“……” (Dark Being)
“……” (Thena)
“““………””” (Toto, Appleseed & undead knights)
The wind blows over the silent lakeside where the two groups face each other.
“Vicky, what are you doing?!” Thena growls between her gritted teeth without looking away from the enemy.
Playing for time, but I can’t answer out loud.
“…let mag’hic do some soul protectin’! [Soul Defence],” I complete my whispered incantation. Shielded from view by Thena’s bulk, and hopefully with the nearby magical fire still muddling the undead’s senses, my spellcasting should have gone unnoticed. It won’t last, but I was able to finish, so it’s not like it matters anymore. My hands light up with a dark blue shine in which dance specks of blood red. Quickly, I apply both palms to Thena’s back. The glow vanishes from my hands and spreads over the Shield Bearer’s whole body. “Thena, when I say go, we jump into the lake. Don’t question it. Just do.”
Of course, even if they missed my casting, the undead mob cannot have failed to notice the now glowing seven-foot-tall half-orc. Already, their leader’s raspy voice once again echoes over the background noise. “How clever… Princess… But I… will not… fall… for your… tricks… It is… you… we are… looking for.”
.
.
.
Wait. Was he actually believing he might have the wrong person?
How is that even possible?!
“Knights… Attack… Master wants… the princess… alive. Kill… the others…”
Master? No. Never mind. As interesting as this all is, we can’t just stay rooted like leek plants waiting to be harvested.
I don’t wait to see the squad of armoured undead rush at us. I turn to our own undead unit and give the only sensible order. “Appleseed, Toto, run!!”
We can’t beat them, and the narrow path to the other side is too long for Thena and me to get across fast enough. We’d be like sitting ducks for that cloaked mage—whatever he might be. However, Appleseed’s top speed should be much faster than the weak me and the bulky Shield Bearer, not to mention the [Death Knights], and Toto doesn’t weight much. They can escape, and nothing out there should be much of a threat to them—present charming company excepted. Anyway, I don’t have the luxury to worry about theoretically immortal beings right now.
I put the pair out of my mind and focus on my own survival. “THENA! GO!!”
I was worried she’d disregard my instructions, what with her strange mood this past hour. However, she must have come to the same conclusion as me—that we were screwed—and decided to trust I had a way out. At my signal, she unequips her shield and starts running towards the lake of swirling tormented souls… but not without picking me up in passing.
“Hey!” I shout, though more in surprise than protest. Why the sudden pickup? Did she believe I would do something stupid like sacrifice myself to give her a chance to escape? Hah! As if! I’ll sacrifice others before risking my own life!
…
Wait. That came out wrong.
From my position, I now have a clear view of the approaching black knights. They are completely disregarding Appleseed and Toto, which is a small relief. But that means all twenty of the undead killing machines, their red eyes shining through the slits of their helms, are coming straight for us at their top speed—one relatively impressive for undead this size and with so much armour on. Although, compared to Headison the [Dullahan], who also was a type of large armoured undead, the [Death Knights] seem like snails compared to a cheetah.
Thena is far from Headison’s freakish speed but she still outpaces the undead group by a good factor. Before the knights are even halfway to us, she takes a running leap and, for a brief instant, we are like suspended in mid-air.
Then we plunge into the maelstrom of twisting spirits and their arms and the pull of the whirlpool grab us. The last thing I hear is the scream of rage of—I think—the cloaked figure, before slimy limbs close onto me and start clawing at my skin, and my entire world devolves into a hell of mind-numbing, impossible, abhorrent, appalling, atrocious, awful, dreadful, gruesome, terrible, horrific pain!
What’s with the sudden fit of Thesaurus?
So, so much PAIN!!!
You’ve got yourself alone to blame for that.
WHAT… THE…
Face it. Your plans suck.
FUUUUUUUUUUU-BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!
* * * * *