Weis and I emerged into a huge central circular chamber that stretched up into the air with its own microclimate. I could see stone bridges and buildings constructed into the stone walls, even as I got a sense of immensity like the Eldritch Tree. The sky was visible far in the distance through a circular hole in the center of its peak. Beyond, I could see dark clouds thundering and producing lightning every few seconds. The ground was filled with smoldering cracks that spewed toxic gases. Which, if you hadn’t figured out by the lava tubes, was another sign we were in the middle of a volcano. An inactive one, thankfully, though only recently so by the evidence around us.

"Impressive, no?" Weis asked, hovering a foot above the rock to keep eye level with me.

"Yeah, it's perfect for a supervillain to build his lair," I said, looking around for the goddess that Weis had given a very memorable description of. Thankfully, I didn't see her yet. "I expected more rivers of lava, though."

"It's not Hell," Weis said. "Besides, just being a dozen feet nearby would burn your face off like Anakin in Revenge of the Sith."

"I know it makes no sense," I said, pausing. "I was just commenting we're in a frigging fantasy world. Maybe there's an amulet you could give me or a spell you could cast over me. Also, am I here or is this a dream?"

"You're dream-walking," Weis explained, gesturing around. "Which is basically astral projection with extra steps. Barring an encounter with a god, there's nothing that can actually hurt you permanently."

"There's a lot of caveats with that sentence," I said, blinking. "Specifically, the words encounter with a god and permanently."

"Veles is sulking in his temple right now so we're probably good there," Weis said. "The other three Old Gods sleep in their elemental temples, soaking up the energies of Mokosh."

"And we are currently in an elemental temple," I said, my voice slightly raising its pitch. I was a stoic person by nature, possibly related to my having undiagnosed high-functioning autism if you believed my mother (and the internet), but Weis was testing even my considerable patience.

Weis spread out his arms. "Come on, Aragorn, trust me."

I stared at him. "I'd punch you but I'm pretty sure it'd kill your eighty-year-old ass. especially with my new ring."

"I'm considerably older than eighty," Weis said. "I was alive before Ledziania, and its peoples were transported to Mokosh."

"And how old are you?" I asked.

"Bronze was the hot new thing when Perun recruited me as his voice," Weis said. "Personally, I think it was a mistake abandoning it for iron. It interferes with magic a lot less. Its why I stick to plastic. Terrible for the environment, good for wizards. Have you ever thought about the fact gasoline and plastic are a form of necromancy? Oil is, after all, liquefied corpses."

"Is this what talking to me is like?" I asked. "Because, if so, I need to talk less."

That was when a bell of doom rang, and I immediately turned around. I was half expecting the Fire Demon to appear but, instead, the black smoke from the ground coalesced into something very different from Chernabog.

I know its cliche to mention this in a fantasy novel, especially this one, but the woman was beautiful. She had long curly flame-red hair trailing back down her neck, perhaps signifying her descent from Mokosh, with a crimson blindfold across her eyes. She was seven feet tall with a well-defined muscular body but still, uh, very pronounced feminine attributes. Which was a reason you should never be ashamed of a little body fat. Her armor was leather rather than metal and didn't restrict her movements in the slightest as she approached, spurts of flame popping out of the ground wherever her feet touch. Ethnicity-wise, I'd say she actually was Asian (or perhaps, specifically, Mongolian) in descent but you could never tell in the Southern Kingdoms. Besides, to quote Egon Spengler, "It's [Gozer] whatever it wants to be."

The woman was a god, I could tell by the fact how the hairs on the back of my neck stood up at her mere presence. All the deities I'd met, which was admittedly just three (and that was three more than most people), projected a kind of aura that made you want to get down on your knees to worship them. The effect on me was muted but that may have been less because I was a demigod myself (supposedly) and more because I was getting a lot of other questionable feelings looking at her. I'm not saying I was feeling strong, "Step on me, mommy" energy but I'm not, not saying it, okay? It was also tempered by the fact she had a huge katana on her back, a no dachi I believed they were called, that radiated more power than my Blades of Chernabog.

The woman stopped a foot in front of me, not meeting my gaze. Which made sense because she was blindfolded. She then spoke in a deep, throaty smoker's voice that reminded me of some old movie femme fatales. "Is this the one who slew Chernabog, Wise Man?"

"It is," Weis said, slapping me on the back.

"I had help," I said, simply.

"Not much help," Weis said. "He is the greatest champion yet."

"That's not saying much," the woman said. "Valentin failed to kill me and sacrificed two of his companions to escape. He ended up facing Belobog instead as his second Old God to slay. The others failed to kill anyone other than Chernabog."

This was all useful information, but I hated being talked over. So, I waved my hand to her. "Hi. I'm Aaron."

"I am Zorya Dawnbringer, Daughter of Perun, Daughter of Mokosh, Daughter of Veles. I am the death of the Fire Giant race and the one who laid low the Twisted Gods known as the Unborn King and the Child Stealer. I am the Bringer of the Sun and Smiter of Evil. I am the twin sister of Zorya Nightbringer and goddess of both love as well as war. I have taken hundreds of warriors to bed and sent thousands more to their ends. In countless bogatyr and their princess brides runs my blood."

I blinked. "Nice to meet you."

Zorya didn't look at me, what with being blindfolded and all. Still, I could feel her mind brushing up against mine. "He is very weak for a demigod."

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"He is a very clever peasant versus a great warrior," Larry said, apologetic. "Not very wise but a lot of low cunning."

"Gee, thanks, Larry," I muttered.

"Do not take it as an insult," Zorya said. "My father was very fond of trickery as an alternative to brute force. It was what allowed him to defeat the Twisted Ones and made him a great pilot in the Earth Great Wars."

Yeah, Perun apparently hooked up with my great grandmother after the Battle of Britain. Both had been two horny Poles looking for solace. In the end, she'd returned home to raise one of my grandfathers. Sadly, she'd ended up getting shot while serving as part of the anti-Soviet resistance and my grandfather had been raised by the state. They'd even given him a Russian name to replace his Polish one.

Dark stuff.

"I was also a pilot but had to fight with the Soviets," Zorya said, perhaps reading my mind. "Otherwise, I would have had to have taken a male form."

"You were a pilot, huh?" I asked, wondering how she fit in the cockpit.

Zorya smirked. "What place on the battlefield did you imagine a sky god's daughter?"

She was also Veles' daughter, but I took her point.

"Veles was part of the Manhattan Project," Weis said, dryly. "Later, he helped make the H-bomb."

Yeah, that tracked with what I knew about Veles. He was a behind-the-scenes kind of guy. "So, was Earth just riddled with gods going about their business-like superheroes in WW2?"

"No," Weis said. "The Ledzianian gods are just built different."

"Those who fled Earth to Mokosh maintain the power to manifest and interact with the world," Zorya said. "Those who did not gradually faded away until they became whispers in their followers' ears and then not even that."

"With a few notable exceptions," Weis said. "No points for guessing the big one."

"Even the Hebrew God prefers more subtle means these days," Zorya said. "Veles does not need worshipers to manifest, though. He is a creator god and even if you cut him off from his stolen power, he will be a threat to your world as well as this one. You must destroy his avatar and find a way to bind him like the Twisted Gods. Otherwise, he will return and slay everyone you know as well as love."

"Yeah," I said. "I'm working on it."

"Zorya has offered to train you to fight the Fire Demon," Larry said, proudly.

I blinked. "Why doesn't she--"

"Don't ask," Larry said, cutting me off. "It's complicated."

"I'm not sure training is going to help me that much," I said, turning to her. "Almost all of my abilities come from brain downloads."

I lifted the Mark of the Champion.

Zorya' expression didn't change. "The magic books and tools created by wizards to bestow knowledge can be useful, but they are a trap. Your mind needs to be at one with the skill and knowledge they've enhanced. There are a few seconds delay with how your improved body will react to commands to strike someone dead or unleash mystical death. Compared to untrained levies or monsters, this may not matter much but against the greatest warriors of the divine, it will be death."

I blinked. "So, like skill books and monster cores from He Who Fights with Monsters?"

Weis facepalmed.

"Shut up," I said, glaring. "LitRPG is awesome."

Zorya looked to one side. "If you can maximize your abilities and overcome your fear of death, then you can develop the strategies to fight the Fire Demon. To give them peace."

"Okay," I said. "About this no fear of death..."

"I'll leave you two alone," Larry said, disappearing.

"Fight!" Zorya said.

"What," I said, not yet aware of what I was supposed to do.

That was when I was decapitated.

YOU HAVE SUFFERED 663 POINTS OF DAMAGE

YOU HAVE DIED

I was aware of the world after my head was cut off, Zorya's sword draw strike so fast that I didn't even see it before I was dead. I saw my body on the ground and watched it dissolve, wondering if I was about to become a raven.

Seconds later, though, I stood up on the ground with my body reforming around me. It took me a second to re-orientate to the fact I wasn't dead anymore.

"Okay, just so I clear," I said, blinking. "I didn't actually die, die, did I?"

"Your dream self will always regenerate," Zorya said. "Weis, correctly, assumed you had much to learn."

I paused. "Wait, you killed me!"

"Yes," Zorya said. "You did not acquit yourself very well."

"Yeah," I said, pausing. "You inflicted like ten times my hit points in damage! I barely felt that strike."

"You will feel the next one," Zorya said.

"Wait..." I said, right before being kicked in the face.

YOU HAVE SUFFERED 54 POINTS OF DAMAGE

"Ahhhh!" I said, landing on the ground and struggling to get up.

That was when Zorya descended on me in a whirlwind of slices that severed me in a half-dozen places.

YOU HAVE SUFFERED 1533 POINTS OF DAMAGE

YOU HAVE DIED

I regenerated from death again and stared at Zorya. "Will you stop that!"

Zorya lifted her sword to one side in a menacing samurai pose. "No. Defend yourself!"

I fired an Arcane Fire blast at her, which she easily knocked away before impaling me on her katana. From there, she hurled me in the air before slicing me in half.

YOU HAVE SUFFERED 833 POINTS OF DAMAGE

YOU HAVE DIED

After my third regeneration, I lifted my hands up. "This is not teaching me anything!"

"It is teaching you that it hurts to be struck by a god. That you will die if you cannot get out of the way," Zorya said. "Parry, dodge, roll, strike me first, or flee. You cannot think but must rely on your instincts, which have not been trained for war. Your instincts are trained for peace and diplomacy. Those must be beaten out of you."

"I'm not sure I want them beaten out--" I started to say.

That was when Zorya opened her mouth and breathed fire, which was agonizing pain before another death.

YOU HAVE SUFFERED 90 POINTS OF DAMAGE

YOU HAVE DIED

I pulled out one of my Chernabog swords and the Rose family shield when I came back. "Okay, now I'm going to kick your ass."

Zorya smiled in amusement.

An instrumental version of "Hearts on Fire" started playing. What followed was a montage of horrifying and painful deaths. Impalings, beheadings, slashings, burnings, and stabbings. I must have died sixty or seventy times across the next few hours with only incremental progress. I learned to dodge, run, block, and time my moves better than I could have ever thought possible.

None of it did a damn bit of a good.

In the end, after what felt like six hours, I managed to last about thirty seconds against her. Even then, I barely managed to strike her once.

Across the cheek.

"Stop," Zorya said, looking down at me despite her blindfold.

I was on one knee, trying to get up but unable to move. My body was unharmed after it's, god knew how many times, death but my brain was suffering from the memories. "Give me a minute. I managed to beat the Serpent King in Eldritch Ring, I can beat this."

Zorya shook her head. "You have learned all you can in a single day. We must continue training on other evenings."

"Oh, great!" I said, my mind freaking out at the prospect.

"You must also grow stronger," Zorya said, her tone condemnatory. "Even with the divine power you've absorbed, you do not have the strength to battle one of the Old Gods. Your tools can only compensate so far."

I wanted to mention that was why I was traveling with a party, but the truth was that I was as much a burden to them as I was an asset. I could come up with crazy plans but when the actual fighting started, I wasn't equal to any of the others. Frigging Sparky was way more valuable to the team.

"How long do I have until I need to face the Fire Demon?" I asked.

Zorya frowned. "Not long. Weeks, perhaps. The madness was interrupted for her by the death of Chernabog and relighting of the sacred fire at the Eldritch Tree, but it will eventually consume her again. Then she will go hunting for her prey. She is not content to wait in her fortress."

That seemed like cheating. "Alright, I'll think of something. I always do. I should get back to my team, they're probably worried."

"Time has not passed," Zorya said, walking up to me and lifting me up in her arms in a bridal carry. "We must now establish our bond for future occasions."

"Uh, hello," I said, looking up at her. "Where are you taking me?"

"To bed," Zorya said. "My payment is a warrior's rest."

“Err, okay.”