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Psychotic Overkill

Edward remained freaking out stranded in the center of the planet. He only had a stump to defend himself in what appeared to be a cursed abandoned factory. There were only two Knights remaining to keep him company. He continued leading them deeper into the haunted warehouse.

The party of three continued a maze of large identical cardboard packages stacked in rows, and rows. There was an odd mysterious object buried under tarps intermixed in the uniform cardboard cutouts. The shadows trailed them while the clock was ticking to get out of this place full of things that could be real or fake.

“What the farc is happening to us?” hyperventilated Mooseman, his gun shaking cradled in his hands.

“I think we're on a death trip to nowhere good?" Squeaked Zito, be careful not set off his friend's hair trigger with a tap on the shoulder.

“Don’t touch me man,” said Moosman.

“Psst that really was the Queen we saw, not a trick,” Zito whispered softly in Mooseman’s ear so Edward couldn’t overhear.

The lanky knight's hands trembled while he held tightly onto his lantern, and sword. The husky one gripped his shotgun above head-height.

"The Queen or mimic,ahem,” Mooseman froze like a deer in headlights on seeing their leader had turned around,”

“She was just here and then she disappeared into a portal either way,” blurted Zito, too focused aiming at a covered metal barrel.

“Okay simpleton listen up. The area around and beneath this temple is haunted, remember the skeletons right?” yelled Edward.

“Yes of course we have been trapped here in the core much longer than you have,” said Zito.

“Yeah remember,” stated Mooseman.

“Well the core is playing mental magic mind tricks in an attempt to break us. It's a kind of spell defense mechanism that causes a mental collapse in the minds of those too weak to withstand it. Now if the two of you keep your composer we have a good gamble at escaping alive and seeing the real version of my mother on the other side, understand,” ordered Edward.

“Yes sir understood,” said the only two remaining knights that hadn't died.

“We will survive,” nodded Mooseman.

“Hey there must be another way out of here, perhaps a better teleporter underneath a tarp or built into a section of the factory where they ship stuff off,” sighed Zito, putting away his weapon.

He turned the knob on his lantern as far as it would go, knocking back the darkness.

“Gulp, we should follow the boxes to their destination then. If the three of us stick together like roach honey we can survive,” said Mooseman, turning round to aim at their rear case, anything would charge behind. “Hey man look at that,” he started walking towards a ledge.

Zito sped off to catch Edward who had already begun leaving. The remaining knight was all alone in an instant. Mooseman found himself left in the dust, staring entranced into a dark chasm of nothiness. The void called the deafening echoes of 10 billion souls screaming trapped in the innermost core.

Mooseman turned spooked out of his wits. He began to jog while losing steam, and sight of both men in front of him. He painted while lagging behind in a zone that punished you just for existing. It only took a single tiny mistake to cause the gruesome demise of anyone no matter how tough in the planet's ruthless ever evolving core.

“Hey there that looks like an exit,” yelled Edward, changing the direction of his stride with the breeze.

He had spotted something sparkling at the edge of his vision briefly between the stacked rows of boxes.

“Maybe we should cut open some of these crates your majesty and see if anything useful resides inside,” Zito loudly huffed out.

“Shh,” said Edward, placing a finger over his lips.

He continued speed walking leaving a dozen identical rows of cardboard furniture behind. Dead ahead was a massive conveyor belt blocking the path forward. It ran stacked with more of the same size boxes along the facility.

Edward followed it until it traveled through a far wall lined with a heavy plastic flap. He looked to see what was on the other side of the beltway. In the cutout they found two identical looking doors waiting on both ends.

“Clang!”

The loud noise of colliding metal rang out behind him. Edward turned to see his two knights toppled together in a pile. They had become separated in the box maze before running into each other around a corner. The big one was in danger of steamrolling the little one below him, but at least nobody's gun had gone off.

“You two numbskulls need to watch where you are going,” Said Edward, rolling Mooseman off the pile with considerable effort.

“Yes sir," he said standing, and lowering a helping hand for his friend.

"Hhhmg, Next time you do that one of us is going to die," said Zito.

“Hey since I feel safer alone, how about we split up and search for clues. I take that door there,” said Edward, pointing. “Now you two take the other one, and we will see which one is housing the escape exit,” ordered Edward.

“Ok so explore as far as you can in what you imagine to be an hour and meet back here at this location,” added Zito.

“Sure, fine,”.

“Yes sir, we won’t let you down,” said Mooseman.

"I wouldn't make any oaths, you can't keep man.. Ahem anyway King good luck to you solo," laughed Zito.

“Don’t go dying on your emperor,” grumbled Edward.

The party split up as planned in effort to find the real exit. The two doors slowly creaked on their hinges while one man got farther away from the others. The floors in the different rooms also creaked.

Edward walked alone further into the abandoned factory. He exited underneath another conveyor belt and ran through the same wall with its entry marked with thick rubber drapes. Those identical looking boxes were still sitting along it every so often. Nothing had changed until he saw the industrial blast door that stuck out from the rest like a sore thumb. It was bright orange and plastered with more warning stickers than you could shake a stump at.

The room revealed behind the unlocked entrance was crammed full of heavy unkempt equipment that blinked through many layers of dust, and spider webs. The floor was a thin metal grate that let you see the far below. Where some kind of grimy old furnace burner sitting below the rusty thin sheet might still have hot coals going.

The catwalk ahead forked in two paths to avoid a rock formation in the center. The structure was lined with pipes, and vats of liquid that looked expired. He followed the opposite path staying with the belt.Edward saw a row of bats sleeping overhead on massive hanging rolls of clear plastic shipping wrapper. The boxes on the belt were wrapped in the stuff going forward.

He continued going until arriving at a rusted railing hanging by a thread that marked a drop to sudden death. A single light lit a rickety looking set of stairs headed underneath the construction failure. He found himself re-acquainted with the other path rejoining into one again. So much for choices thought Edward. He pushed open the next conveniently unlocked metal door.

On the other side a single red light emitted from a small rectangular control panel left dangling in the steamy closet sized room. A thick wire hung from the ceiling connected to the remote while the three circular buttons dangling around on the surface swung red, green, and yellow.

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Edward got closer to the remote waiting to be pushed. He stopped and looked behind his shoulder to double check the coast was clear. A bucket of trash almost looked like an attacker for a second. He noticed the rows of lockers, a slimy toilet, and a bathtub overfilled with maggots a little past it.

“If only they still made escape manuals for factory settings,” sighed Edward, grabbing hold of the device.

None of the buttons were labeled, but only one of them glowed red.

“Perhaps that button is the alarm,” Edward noted to himself.

He hit the non glowing green one, and waited. Nothing happened, so he tried the yellow.

"Farc it," he said, attacking the red over and over again like a bull.

He climbed the cable it was attached to and started beating the device into the low ceiling. The wall groaned, pulling back a new entrance where the lockers had just been.

“My lucky day,” said Edward, leaving.

He walked into the dark opening. The air was crisp, frigid, and sinister. A cold wind whistled from somewhere. There he stepped out of the cave, and from beyond a grave. The picture had suddenly become black and white. He held up his stump, and the dull scab confirmed that the color had been left back in the building.

He approached a small rock wall blocking the immediate way forward. It didn’t take much effort to climb behind it. Inside, rows of small buildings sat every so often among the tombstones. The only illuminating light appeared to be moonlight borrowing through a large hole dug in the massive cavern above. It seeped in enough to provide a clear picture with the aid of a select few burning torches scattered around.

Edward scanned the massive graveyard for any signs of life. He found nothing in that department, but he did see what looked like a renamated patrolling skeleton. At the far end of the far side looked to be a rock running over a cliff edge. A bridge or something else leading back to his old life of luxury he would find.

Edward sunk behind a crypt as he heard something drawing near. As soon as he had hidden the sound of horses, sleigh bells, and cracking whip intensified.

“I almost got our fresh finds to the dump on time just like I told you Nancy. Yeehaw,” cried the dead driver, as the pair sped past.

Ned was clocked aboard a carriage with a blind dead witch of a passenger in Nancy. They were pulled by the two skeletal remains of horses. The vehicle's body was packed to the brim with jostling coffins threatening to break out, and so one did. The simple wooden coffin flipped over a bump. It smacked into a grave exploding into a shower of splinters, hair, teeth, and armor.

“Rats, I've done and flunked another,” cried Ned, stopping the sleigh.

“What have you screwed up now?’ asked a raspy voice aboard.

“Just stay put Nancy. We dropped another coffin. You aren’t capable of cleaning up anything due to your lack of eyes,” said Ned.

“I would make you clean up your own messes regardless,” she cackled.

The cloaked zombie with the frozen beard climbed onto the stones. He let the hook out from where it had been hiding in his wizard cloak. It reflected a pale horse's skull in the moonlight while Ned stroked the sharp edge of the crystal.

Edward swore under his breath from where he was hiding. This was his best opportunity to retrieve his prized object that was stolen from him by that creature. He just needed to lurk in the shadows a little while longer, and plot the best angle to attack.

The coffin had bumped off the wagon, and burst apart at the seams. The runaway corpse had all the limbs still attached at least. Ned eyed the target over and then aimed his fist at it. The hook shot out of his arm on sparking wires with a pop pierced through the stomach of the target. Ned fumbled with his other arm looking for something hidden in his robes.

“No where did I put it shit,” he mumbled, throwing out two pool balls black and white out of his front pockets.

“What’s taking you so long?” Nancy whined from the hearse.

“Shut up witch, Ahh ha nevermind I found it,” cried Ned.

He held a tiny object to the moon in triumph. It was a winch key found on wind up toys, musical boxes and torture devices. Ned slammed the key into his successful experimental arm. He began winding, while an oily substance began spurting, and the corpse hauled forward with haste.

“Gotcha,” said Ned, lifting the pierced body back towards his wagon.

Edward leapt onto Ned in a surprise attack with his stump extended.

“Smack, whack, CRACK!”

He beat the cloaked zombie wizard with his stump too hard, launching it into the air like a home run. Ned smashed through a gravestone and kept on traveling on a crash course out of bounds.

“What in tarnation was that get it Nancy,” yelled Ned, smashing another stone to dust behind him.

Ned tumbled around flailing through different directions until he was heading towards a splat with the wall. He aimed the hook at Edward and fired his shot. The dead pierced body smashed into Edward scoring a direct hit.The corpse's head bit into a spiked grave marker anchoring Ned seconds away from being impacted by the wall.

Edward dusted himself off. He saw the wizard start to wind away from him again. He would have to pull it together from opposite ends of the graveyard. There was time to strike when he couldn’t be hurt by his own hook.

Edward followed the wires to hyper-focus on the fastest route to take. He sprinted as fast as he could past the hearse, and connected living dead horses. He dodged three bites in his general direction. He barreled towards the hook impaling a corpse and hooked to a grave marker towering overhead.

“What slithers by my hot rod chariot unless it is flame breathing zombie reptiles you stand no chance against my necromancy,” called Nancy, sitting in the rickety hearse drawn by the normal looking skeletons of horses.

“Dead be my eyes, and my teeth, You must rise from the grave to help Ned again, and again forever till time ends because he is incompetent,” cried Nancy, seemingly casting a spell.

A termite emerged from the hearse, as a maggot emerged from Nancy’s eye socket. The bugs ate well, as hungry hands inside the loaded coffins shook the shackles.

“Oh boy I forgot to unlock you guys.. Well gotta get the key to the coffins, but there's plenty of freshly buried plots to make up for it,” she cackled.

Edward ran past weathered grave after grave that were all beginning to look the same. A golden naked statue momentarily distracted him with a display of massive junk. A plain fountain marked the path. A hole in the wall to a garden filled with dead flowers withered away to twigs.The grave marker was in the center. It was a spiral building just big enough to house winding stairs. Edward could see them waiting to be conquered through the open door as he continued sprinting through the brown grass. He entered the structure and climbed as quickly as he could to the top.

The chained door was beaten open by a single blow from the stump. On the roof the wind blew, rattling tarps, drainpipes, and gargoyles. The bloody body hooked through the waist to the highest point overhead rattled the most. Edward looked over the side. Ned was really struggling to wind himself up the tower. Above the King was going to have to come up with a way to wind himself to the top before the wizard.

“Hmm” said Edward stump on his chin deep in thought.

“UrRG” spluttered Ned, winding with his hand, and climbing the tower with his feet.

The blood supply of the arm long dried on his shirt every twist of the winch still brought the wizard towards his hook, and body. He put foot over foot clumsily shambling along like only a zombie. Regardless of his current condition he would prove Nancy that he was a supremely competent individual. The only problem was she couldn’t see anything including how awesome he was.

“Smack, Wack, whamo!”.

Edward launched himself onto the wizard, and beat him with the royal stump. He cracked Ned in the head over, and over, and over again at full force. The stump was bleeding again, but Ned's skull had been caved in. Edward licked his lips when he saw the sweet brains exposed and came down swinging harder, and harder again. They were no longer slowly winding towards the destination hook.

“UUUUUH” groaned the zombie, dropping a device he tried to activate.

“You were dead before, but now you're really brain dead. A fitting punishment for a thief it is only too bad you were not alive to suffer more” said King Edward.

He was winding the key impaled into the limp zombie arm with a little skull remaining. They had almost reached the hook at the end of the wires. The device Ned had dropped below was a timed explosive.

Wind whistled fiercely on top of the grave marker. The spike was a barb over a platform to stand on. Edward held Ned’s arm as the wind blew him side to side, and over the roof. He slowly reeled them towards the hooked corpse. They were almost there..

“Gotcha,” said Edward.

The impaled knight fell to a limp thud on the platform below. The extended wires from the hook launching mechanism had begun to heap around threatening to tangle everything. The King removed his hook from being unstuck carefully with only his feet anchoring him. Ned added a ton of additional weight that threatened to topple them. Edward raised his stump and impaled it where the hook had previously hooked.

“Yeeooow” he yelled.

With his body secured at the stump Edward raised Ned by the arm. He already held the dead wizard's extended hook hand clenched between his teeth. He used his crystal implanted mouth to begin sawing away into the bone. Ned's arm had attached a modified version of the King’s stolen hook. Edward was getting everything back and more.

“Hehehehe,” the dead wizard faintly laughed insanely to himself to cover up the pain of amputation.

“Who’s laughing now? I guess still you I thought the dead couldn’t feel a thing shut up,” said Edward.

He finished his cut, and released the body below. Ned hit the edge of the platform with the other corpse before rolling off to further fall. Edward was held high in the air by his stabbed stump as he slowly wound the two part hook launching device back together.

"Finally the hook is mine again," cried the King of the tower.

On ground level far below the wave of zombie knights summoned by Nancy had swarmed. Now they entered the base of the structure to climb the stairs. This was where the timed explosive dropped by defeating Ned in time had fallen onto a zombie arrow quiver. It was stabbed by an arrow and soon exploded. The explosion rocked the graveyard destroying anything caught close. The tower creaked, moaned, and began to topple on account of taking most of the damage. It all fell down slowly wobbling from side to side, then just as it had started it smashed all together in a steaming pile of ruble. There was nothing that looked alive remaining here.