Several days later, after some hard travelling and battling, along with some distractions to fulfil their curiosity, Diana and co finally made it to the kingdom of [Gazelle]!
So!...One word.
“HUGE!!!!”
Yep, [Gazelle] was huge, very. Well, she knew that it was a kingdom, and it’s common sense that kingdoms are huge, but, still…Actually getting to set her eyes on one was just…awesome.
First off, as of now, they were waiting in line to get checked in through the gate, with guards standing by the opened gates inspecting the people who went in, just in case some outlaw or whatnot decided to appear.
So while waiting, Diana was happily marvelling at the towering walls surrounding the kingdom. If anything, it reminded her of one of the stone brick walls from Attack on Titan.
Crystal and Anna were also doing the same, since the former had only lived inside the dungeon and the other had lived out her current life at a small village.
“Have you three never been to a kingdom?” The three shook their heads at Ilgua’s question, eyes still staring in awe at the huge towering walls. But! More than that! They couldn’t wait to see what’s on the inside!
…Oh, and since they’ll be entering human civilisation now, Diana forced Rei into some used clothes she ‘borrowed’, much to her displeasure. She didn’t want anyone seeing her naked, okay!?
“Identity.”
Ah, before they realised, it was their turn next. Diana showed her card and got through, Crystal and Anna did the same, Ilgua pulled out his(his guild card was blue!), Paulena mindlessly showed hers, and Rei got through with the excuse that she was lost hers and got through with a small fee of 1 silver.
And, once they were in, the kingdom was just…beautiful.
The streets were laid out using stone bricks, the houses were medieval style(of course), with some exceptions being the guild buildings, a training academy, and some suspicious looking buildings she wasn’t quite sure what for.
And standing in the centre of this all, was the castle, where the king lived comfortably with his wife and children.
Most of the populace were humans, but, much to her displeasure, she could spot some people with collars around their neck, similar to the one Paulena was wearing right now.
They ranged from young but ragged looking men, to children, and what seemed to be Beastmen, or as humans usually call them, demi-humans. It wasn’t…nice to look at, but knowing that Paulena’s in a similar situation because of her, she didn’t have much ground to talk on, did she?
Uwah~, now she’s feeling kinda bad for putting her in this state…
Well, she did try to kill and capture her first, so her empathy wasn’t made for her, but still…
“…Diana?”
“Huya!? O-Oh, what’s up, Rei?”
She tried to reply with the happiest voice she could muster right now, but, they weren’t convinced.
Well, it made sense really. She’s born from Earth, and on that green planet, morals and ethics were a big thing of life there. She was a stuck up NEET, sure, but she still held the morals that her father had taught to her back then.
Seeing those people, their expressions twisted in suffering and pain, it made her stomach feel weird.
‘Muu…What’s wrong with me suddenly…?’
But, well, human lives don’t seem to hold much value here, and killing was-
No, even then, even if killing and slavery was fine, it’s…still not super okay in her book.
She wasn’t sure why she killed those bandits without much thought back then, maybe she was just groggy having just woken up, but looking back, hearing the bandit leader’s muffled scream was-
‘N-No, stop it! What am I thinking!?’ Her heart felt heavy. It was beating rapidly, stress was building up, cold sweat began to form on her palm. Her heart kept on beating, pumping the ‘blood’ that filled her.
“Oi. Diana.”
“Uwah!?”
“You okay? You look slightly pale.”
O-Oh…It seems like she got sucked into her own world again. Everyone was looking really worried now, and…venturing deeper into her thoughts now might not be a good thing.
With, somewhat slower pace, and without her usual trademark wide smile, Diana and co slowly made their way to the nearest inn, booked a large room for the six of them, and settled in.
‘How…did I kill them so easily…?’ That question echoed in her mind as she slowly slid into her bed sheets, the warmth quickly inviting her to sleep.
But without Diana to start a conversation, the five just, sat around, silence in the air.
“I-Is Miss Diana okay…? She looked rather pale…”
Anna was the first to break the ice, before everyone quickly fell back into their thoughts and silence ruled the air once more.
Since Anna and Ilgua didn’t know how Earth was, they weren’t quite sure what’s wrong with her. But, Crystal had an idea.
“I think she’s beating herself up over, something.”
“Beating herself up? What do you mean?” Ilgua was rather intrigued.
“I’m not sure myself, but last time she’s beating herself up over something, the same thing pretty much happened, aside from her crying and all.”
“W-Will Miss Diana be okay then?”
She couldn’t answer Anna’s questions so easily. After all, Diana was goofy and bubbly on the outside, but how was she on the inside?
But. Little did they know, Diana was actually still somewhat awake at that moment, and her dark thoughts were…getting worse.
‘I said I hated seeing others get injured, but I corroded Paulena’s skin without a second thought. I said I didn’t like violence, but I killed those bandits so easily. What a f*cking hypocrite I am.’
She didn’t know why, but the regret from all her deeds were only coming to her now. Like water just waiting to break free from a dam. And it was wrecking her.
‘What the f*ck happened to me?’ Was the first question. ‘Did fusing with Slimey make me like this?’ Came next. ‘Am I…slowly losing myself?’
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The prospect itself scared her to her core. If she really was slowly losing herself, like chips of stone carved away in a rough rainstorm, then…who was she now?
Was she still Davin? The ‘ProDavin888’, the legendary NEET, the boy turned girl who so wanted to adventure to a world unknown, or someone else?
Who…is she now?
‘Am I…Can I, kill people…now…? With…such, ease…?’
Killing a monster was…still unpleasant to think about, but it made sense at least. They didn’t exactly have much intelligence per se, and she needed to kill them to survive after all, but people?
It was as if…she was becoming a monster herself.
Even tracing back further than those bandits, when they first escaped Tartarus, why…why did she jump in and eat that zombie alive? As if…she was like them.
‘N-No…s-stop it…’ It was getting worse, the voices in her head, screaming at her. Her throat was burning, her body felt heavy, her heart felt, strained.
It’s…She-
“She was eyeing those slaves from before. I’m not sure what she was thinking then, but…she’s kind, too kind at times. But…I suppose it’s what I like about her.”
Suddenly, Crystal’s soft hands gently ruffled her hair. Slowly, slowly but surely, those voices faded away, locked back into the back of her mind.
Honestly though, Crystal gently comforting her was…nice. If she’s awake, she’ll probably not do this, but…hey, it’s her profit, right?
But, it made her happy, seeing as she still thought of her as being kind. She was having to put her entire willpower to stop herself from crying.
‘…Thanks, Crystal.’
Well, for now, perhaps some sleep will clear her head for the rest of the day.
As for who she was…that can wait for further info. She’ll settle on being ‘Davin’ for now, yeah?
…………………
“You okay now?”
“…Yeah, sorry.”
After a nice 2 hour sleep, Diana’s back up, and-…well, she wasn’t completely back to her ‘usual’ self. She wasn’t joking around or being bubbly, but her smile’s there. In fact, her soft smile seemed much more genuine now…or maybe that’s just her.
Looking out through the window, the sun was getting quite low. It’s not evening just yet, but the sun’s already beginning to dip into the horizon. Adventuring out at this time would not be a good idea.
So, they mostly spent the time chatting to each other and resting.
…Or that’s what they would’ve done, but no one bothered to start a conversation.
So, with no one wanting to speak up, and with no spark to light a conversation, a nice tranquil silence ruled the atmosphere, giving Diana some time to think.
She wasn’t showing it, but in fact, she’s feeling much more alive than even right now. Unlike the moments before when she was being bubbly and all, this felt like she’s back to her normal self, the Davin she was.
Thinking about it, maybe fusing with Slimey did cause some problems in her psyche, but she’s ‘back’ now.
She hasn’t changed much. She’s still a NEET, who’s dream is to explore this world with her friends and cook some delicacies like in Toriko.
Actually, thinking about it more, who was truly in control back then?
Back on Earth, born as a proud American, she was…was…huh? For some reason, she couldn’t remember much about her birth-, no, not just her birth, much of her past life back on Earth was just…missing.
Things like foods and games were still sticking in her mind(for some reason), but other details, like where her home was, what state she lived in, and other minor stuff, she couldn’t remember.
Was this a side effect from coming back to life? It’ll make sense, since you won’t just come out from your death bed saying ‘Oh! I’m totally fine!’ with no worries cropping up inside your head.
Even now, it felt like some things were slowly slipping out of her. Like drops of water leaking from a crack, her knowledge and memories were slowly being drained. Well, it’ll still take a long time, but…
…still. If that was true…If she really was losing herself more and more as time passes on, what…what will be left of her by the end of it all? Will she remember Earth? Will she remember her birthplace?
Would she recall herself being human, at all?
The possibility sent chills down her back. Because if she losses herself, losses her morals, the lessons that she held deeply, would she then begin killing with a second thought?
In her terms, a monster wasn’t a race or a class, it was something that hunted and killed without any thought or remorse, without any conscience telling them that the things they were doing were wrong.
Rei, Crystal, Ilgua, and even Anna to an extent didn’t care about life as much as she did. Was it just because they were raised in such different environments?
Then…was she in the wrong? Should she be the one to dispose of her morals and fight and kill?
‘S-Stop it…’
Should she abandon the morals her father had thought her, and proceed together with this world? Where a single life only amounted to a single grain of sand inside a desert?
‘S…Stop…’
The little voices clashed against each other. She could hear it, a voice calling to her, saying that all this was just over-thinking things. That all this regret and remorse from just killing a group of bandits was dumb.
And in some aspect, it was.
But, while they were bandits, yes. What caused them to become like that? Was it their nature? Greed? Lust?
Or was it because life had forced them that way. A betrayal, poverty, a loss of faith. They didn’t show it, but there must have been one or two bandits there that didn’t steal and plunder just because they wanted to.
And knowing that she had shut them down, it displeases her.
“Diana?”
“Hya!? W-What is it Crystal?”
Huh…It seems like she got too deep into her thoughts again. Crystal was pretty much getting ill with worry at this point, seeing as Diana did just stay silent and unmoving for around 30 minutes.
“Are you really okay? You’re shivering. You sick or somehyaAA!? W-W-What are you d-doing!?”
Without much thought, she moved and hugged her, much to the other’s shock. Diana herself wasn’t quite sure why she did so, but the little voices in her head began to die down as her warmth comforted her.
“Sorry, I…just, need this…for a bit.”
“W-W-W-We’re b-being w-watched!!” She almost said comically as she eyed the others, no one was actually bothered though. They just stared at the two, still warped in worry for Diana.
But, much to their surprise, she answered in a soft, almost weak and defeated voice.
“…Please.”
And by that point, not even her shame could stop her from hugging back.
“…Hah…Alright, there there.”
…………………
The next day, quite early in the morning,
“Alright! Towards the adventurer’s guild it is!!”
And Diana’s back to her normal self again! It was a great morning for mostly everyone, but a terrible morning for Crystal, who happened to wake up the latest, and was still somewhat groggy.
“So loud…”
“H-Hang in there, Miss Crystal!”
As Diana had just said, they were currently headed for this kingdom’s adventurer’s guild, which from afar, seems more like a Japanese dojo than anything else. Not like she’s seen one in real life, just from pictures on Google.
It was mostly made out of wood, had around 3, maybe 4 floors, and was big, really big. Not as big as that castle in the centre of the kingdom, but still big nonetheless.
Their objective for the morning was to sign Rei up as an adventurer, and get her a guild card so they could spare themselves from having to pay a fee every time they entered a new kingdom.
Once inside, they went up to the second floor and signed Rei up there, since the first floor was actually a tavern-like place, with a bar, a small restaurant combined with it, and what seems to be a place for a musician or whatnot.
With her name signed and the fee paid, Rei’s card would take around 30 minutes to fully process, and another 30 minutes to create.
The process to create these things were a secret, kept in so that no idiot would try and replicate them. A smart move.
While waiting, they just went back down to the first floor to have a nice breakfast together. It was also then that she realised that their money supply was dipping, and buying stuff carelessly would probably be a bad idea.
Since it’s still early, there weren’t many people coming in and out, maybe one or two, but the place was mostly silent. Except for Diana’s group of course, as they listened in on Ilgua’s tales.
After finishing up their breakfast(which was good by the way), Rei, accompanied by Ilgua and Anna, casually sat back at the first floor, while Diana and Crystal went up to the second floor and looked at the [Quest Billboard].
[Quests], in the receptionist’s own words, ‘are little missions given out by people when they need something that is faintly related, or directly related to an adventurer’s work line, as in fighting monsters and stuff’.
So, it could be a ‘Kill monster and get monster parts’ quest, or a ‘protect/safely bring me to certain location’ quest, or even a ‘deliver this(aka FedEx)’ quest. Of course, there are more interesting quests than that, but most of the billboard was crowded with these three types.
After a while, they didn’t find any interesting quests to pick, and Rei’s guild card was finally done, so they headed back down to the first floor, only to find-
“H-Hii!! I’m sorry! P-Please forgive meeee!!”
A large man kneeling before Ilgua, who had his magic sword drawn out, and had seemingly sliced him straight across his chest. Blood was quickly leaking out of his wound, and just seeing that alone was making her nauseous.
“You better be.”
From the looks of it, and from what Anna tried to explain through her gibberish, this man pretty much tried to hook up with Rei and Anna, while scoffing at Ilgua, only to get a punch to his abdomen from Rei, and a clear slash from Ilgua.
But…She’s not sure how to put it, but…something feels…different about Ilgua. Maybe it was just her, but…there was this, ‘aura’ around him that just screamed danger. Heck, even her [Danger Perception] was blaring its alarms, and he wasn’t even targeting her!
Feeling threatened by this display, the man, and the other two who followed behind him, quickly made haste towards the exit and left, which garnered him a grateful thank you from the bartender, as those three were frequent ‘jackasses’ as he puts it.
Well, he’s back to his normal reserved and humble self, so…everything’s good then.