“Huh…A graveyard…”

About two hours had passed by, and now Diana found herself standing before a lonely graveyard, accompanied by her ‘trusty’ companions. Just as you would expect, the graveyard, had a lot of graves!

“I wonder if there’re any treasures inside…”

“Isn’t that just graverobbing?”

‘Shut up! I can loot stuff from graves too!’ Was what she wanted to say, but after some thought, wasn’t that just immoral? Isn’t it kinda rude to just walk up to someone’s grave and start digging, in hopes that there were treasures inside?

Tomb Raiding was illegal, okay?

That aside…It’s quiet, really quiet. Well, it is a grave, so what do you expect? It’s a place for placing corpses! Would be quite unpleasant to see a lively graveyard…

Taking a look around, the graves here…seemed to be actual graves, with actual people’s names carved into the stones. She couldn’t read them, of course. There was no Google Translate here, was there?

While Diana was taking a silent stroll around the graves, Crystal and Slimey patiently waited outside. There wasn’t really a reason to head in with her, so she shrugged her shoulders and watched from behind.

Ah, this was really boring…Standing out here without anyone to talk to was really boring. She had to admit, having Diana around was quite a good way to stave off boredom, even if it wasn’t the safest way around. Although…

“…Where the f*ck is she?”

Oi, wasn’t she taking too long? It’d been 10 minutes! That was just a graveyard! What was so interesting about a place filled with buried coffins?!

……20 minutes. 20 minutes had passed by, and she hadn’t returned yet. Where the hell was she? Actually, hadn’t it been a bit too silent lately?

“Oi! Why the f*ck are you taking so long?!”

…Silence was what she got. Was Diana playing an ignorance game with her? She felt oddly excited-, A-Anyways, she got no reply! Did something bad happen to Diana or something? The thicker fog wasn’t helping either!

Well, standing here wouldn’t really prove anything, so let’s just head there already.

But, Diana was nowhere in sight?! Where the hell did she go?! Did she exit from the wrong side or something?! Wait a second, there seemed to be something behind one of the graves…

…Eh?

“…Diana?”

“Zzzz…”

Oi. Did she fall asleep, in a graveyard? Really? Well, she is quite the ⑨, so this didn’t shock her as much, but still! Really?! Was she that tired from walking?!

“Hah…What the hell…”

………………

Uwah…Dark, why was this place so dark? Where the hell was this?! Wasn’t she just at the graveyard moments ago?! She’s getting a sense of déjà vu for some odd reason…

Hmm? Was that a tree right there? It’s huge too?! How tall was that thing?!

That aside, was this a dream? That would explain why she was in such an odd place…Wait, but didn’t that mean that she fell asleep, in a graveyard?

T-That aside, was her real body okay?! She didn’t get buried alive by a skeleton or something, did she?! Uwah~, this was giving her the chills from those Pokémon creepy pastas she used to read…

Muu, just trying to picture her body getting locked up in a coffin was terrifying enough! She needed to get out of here, but how?! This whole place was a void of all colours, with only one gigantic tree standing proudly in the centre!!

Hah…Getting worked up was no good. Standing here wouldn’t do much good either. Guess that giant tree’s the best option she had now, wasn’t it?

Just like she had seen, this tree’s huge! From straight under, she couldn’t even see the tip! Wonder just how tall this tree actually was…Anyways, time to investigate!

-About 5 minutes, or 10, actually, how much time has passed exactly?-

Nothing!! There’s nothing here!! Just an endless void, with one damn huge tree standing in the centre of it all! Oi! Yggdrasil, Saigyou Ayakashi, giant deku tree, answer her already!!

Because she got frustrated, she ended up smashing her head against the tough bark several times, but it only ended up giving her a good headache. She also tried pinching herself, but her cheeks became swollen because of it, so let’s stop that, shall we?

Agh!! This was annoying!! Why can’t this dream end already!! She might already be dead for all she knows! Wait, if she was dead, then was this limbo?

Nonono, let’s not go there yet! Think positive!

Hmm…Actually, what would happen if she broke this huge tree apart? Would the dream end by then? Or would she violate the Yama and get sent down into the abyss?

“If only I-“

-had an axe, was what she was about to say. But there, within her hands, was exactly the tool she was about to mention, a polished iron axe! How the hell did this thing even get here?! That aside, let’s get on to chopping this damn tree!

-30 minutes? An hour? I don’t know man, time flows weirdly here-

Kuh, this tree was a tough one! Her polished iron axe hardly did anything! What monstrous defence! She even used another, much sharper steel axe to try and cut it down, but nothing!

Here’s a list of the things she had found out:

-She was able to ‘Create’ anything she wanted. Why? She wasn’t too sure.

-This tree was damn tough!

And that’s about it! It wasn’t much, but being able to ‘Create’ things out of thin air was quite convenient!

It was then, a giant light bulb lit up within her head!

This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.

She could’ve just used a chainsaw this whole time! Forget about those axes, it was time for the main player to step into the ring!

“Chainsaw!”

And just like that, a chainsaw appeared within her hands! Uwah, the sleek metallic body of the iron, the cold sensation of the body, not something she would ever expect to feel in a world filled with magic and slimes…

Not complaining though! Let’s get to cutting this tree!

*Vrrooomm*

Yes! It’s slow, but it’s working!! Cut, my pretty, cuuutt!!!

But, as she was slowly cutting through the tough bark, something incredible popped up!

It’s a sign!

‘Hey! Stop cutting that down, you idiot! Do you want to die?!’ Was the text that was written on the small wooden sign. It seemed to be written quite hastily too…

“…Eh? What the hell?”

‘Don’t ‘Eh?’ me! Stop cutting already!’ Was the next thing that was written on it-, wait, did the word just change?! How was that even possible?!

‘How should I know? Magic?’

“Gah?! Y-You can read my mind!!”

‘Well, duh, obviously. I am you after all!’

“…Was that a reference to Persona?”

‘What? No! I was being serious!’

…Such was the conversation that seemed to casually play out. An exchange between an idiot and a wooden sign…not something I would ever expect to see. Then again, this whole story was stupid in the first place.

“So…What is this place?”

‘This? To be honest, I don’t really know. I guess you could call it a type of lucid dream? I mean, you can create things from thin air and talk to a sign, so this being a dream wouldn’t be too off.’

“Huh.”

A lucid dream, huh…It wasn’t the most interesting of answers, but that would do. At least that means that she was still alive, right?

Or was this all a lie?

“Say, how do I leave this place?”

‘Hmm? Leave? I can’t really say how, since, you know, I’m you. But maybe once you wake up?’

“And when will I wake up?”

‘……Don’t know.’

“Oi, what’s with that pause?”

‘Remember, I am you, and you are me. Anything you know, I will. But, anything you don’t know, I won’t know either. I’m not some omnipotent encyclopaedia that will explain each and every little function this damned place has, okay?!’

“Okay, okay, calm down~”

Alright, here’s an updated list of the things she knew!

-She was able to ‘Create’ anything she wanted.

-This tree was damn tough!

-Cutting that tree down would probably kill her.

-This sign was her? Eh? Like, as in her other personality?! Could she perhaps switch personalities and have each personality wield different powers?!

‘Stop getting ahead of yourself.’

“Geez, you’re ‘me’ right? At least be more fun!”

‘If I were human, I would probably cringe so much that I would die from intoxication.’

“That’s mean!”

Somehow I feel like I’m getting forgotten in this…

“”Shut up””

U-Uwah…

“Actually, do you have a name?”

‘A name, why would I need a name? I mean, I’m a sign damnit!’

“Umu……Hmm……Ah! How about…Wait…uhh…”

What are you doing? Just-

“Shut up, I’m thinking.”

U-Uuu…D-Diana’s being a meany…

“Muuu~……Ah! How about Sig?!”

‘Sig? Sig…I like it! Sounds pretty nice.’

Wasn’t the name ‘Sig’ from the word ‘Sign’? Didn’t you just remove the-

“Shut up! This is MY story, so stop speaking already!!”

F-Fine! I-It’s not like I w-wanted to narrate this story or a-anything! B-Baka!

“Ahem, so, is there a way to end this dream?”

‘Hmm…I can’t really tell. Sorry.’

“Nah, it’s fine, man…But, what should I do in the meantime?”

‘…Why not train? Better than doing absolutely nothing, am I right?’

“I guess so!”

*Gasps* I-I’m finally allowed to talk again! The 4th wall was about to get destroyed!!

Ahem, that aside, without any ideas as to wake herself up, it was bound to get boring! Sure, Sig’s here and all, but even talking to this sign for countless hours wouldn’t prove healthy. So, with Sig’s suggestion, it was time to train!

…………….

By the end of it all, she was completely exhausted, both physically and mentally!

Since there weren’t any dangers in this void, she decided to use it to train her [Slime Valley] for once. By the time her ‘MP’ ran out, her [Slime Valley] had reached Level 3! Hell yeah~!

Next on the list, was physical training! Running laps around the giant tree, doing random jumps and squats, training with a wooden pole, you know, the usual. Sadly, no boosts to her [Polearm Mastery], but hey, what can she do?

And so, that brings us all the way back here, with Diana resting atop the void floor, eyes staring up at the giant tree. Ah, the exhaustion was quickly catching up…This was bad…What would happen is she fell asleep here…?

Agh…She’s tired…Sleep wouldn’t be too bad…right…?

…………

“Oi. Awake yet, idiot?”

“U-Umu…?”

A-Ah? W-What the…? She’s…back? She could see the bright blue skies above, and she could feel the grass brushing against her! S-She’s back!!

“I’M BACK!!!”

“W-What the?”

Oi, that shout could’ve attracted some undead monsters to her location. Shouldn’t she be more careful?

That aside, she was finally back out!! Although Sig’s company wasn’t all that bad, being trapped in that dream for what felt like an eternity wasn’t how she wanted to spend her life in this fantasy world! Well, at least her time there wasn’t completely useless.

“Calm down, dumbass. What if monsters heard that?”

“Huuh~? Look, I just fell into the void, tried killing myself, talked with a sign, and woke back up here. So shut your mouth, okay~?”

“Y-Yes ma’am.”

‘What the hell was she saying? The void? D-Did she just have a conversation with the minister?! A-And what was with that threat at the end? Was it getting hot around here or what?’ Was what she thought of when that info dump hit the fan.

“…Ahem, so, how long has it been?”

“…Eh? Sorry, what did you ask, ma’am?”

“…How long has it been?”

“O-Oh. I-It’s been about 4 hours, ma’am.”

4 hours?! She slept in this place for 4 hours?! Damn, she definitely got lucky that no monsters came! Or did Crystal take care of them all? On that note, what was with her polite speak? It’s slightly disturbing…

*Boink!*

“Ah, I’ve missed you~!!”

With a wide smile, she picked Slimey up and hugged him tight. Even if it’s only been 4 hours, having this little guy back to welcome her was always the best way to go!

Anyways, that aside, they should probably leave now. Staying near a graveyard for too long wouldn’t prove healthy to the human mind, yes? Heading for the border of this withered forest should prove to be their next objective.

“Now then…where to go…?”

“Un. Follow me, ma’am.”

“O-Oh, okay…And please drop the polite talk, it’s disturbing.”

“……Eh? I was being polite?”

Was she a bird brain or what? Hah…Anyways, with Crystal leading the way, Diana continued her journey towards the forest’s borders. With Slimey following behind, of course!

…………

Well, this journey has been quite…boring. She hadn’t met up with anything!! No zombies nor skeletons, no cool dungeons or graveyards, nothing!! Where did they all go?!

Wait, shouldn’t she be happy about this? They didn’t encounter any troubles, there weren’t any distractions, so all well and good, right? No!! This was a fantasy world!! It should be filled with wonderful things!! Was the spawn rate bugged or something?!

Then again, it’s only been 15 minutes, so she was just being impatient, no?

“Graaa…”

Actually, scratch that, there’s some zombies right there! They seemed to just be hanging around. [Fight] or [Run]? Hmm…

“GRRAAA!!”

Never mind, the zombies already noticed their presence! Well, want it or not, here they come!

*Bak!*

A good punch was sent to the zombie’s gut! Hardly any damage was dealt! No matter, just add in an extra [Slime Cannon]!

*Bam!*

Although it wasn’t dead yet, that one zombie was knocked out of the fight! 3 more zombies left to go!

Seeing its brethren shot back, the 3 zombies became angered and rushed at Diana! But the next thing they knew, their legs were trapped within a thick coat of sticky slime! They were stuck!

“Uh, Crystal? Can you kill them?”

“Ha? Why should I do that?”

“…Fine.”

Since Crystal was still reluctant, let’s finish this on her own! With her slime, she covered the rest of the zombies’ bodies, just to make sure no damage was taken. She didn’t want her punching bag to fight back, did she?

“Graa!!!”

“Ah, forgot about you!”

There was still one more zombie left! Clutching its stomach, the injured zombie slowly walked up to Diana, but not before a coat of slime landed on its legs, trapping its movements. In a swift motion, Diana ran, and sent a punch straight at its face!

*Bak!*

Critical hit! The zombie wavered slightly, but was still alive! Well, here’s another punch, and another one, and it don’t coming~! A wave of swift punches landed on the zombie, leaving no moment to counter! *Ora, ora, ora, ora, ora, ora, ora, ora, ora, ora!!!*

[Enemy has been slain! – Experience has been gained]

“Now then…”

Slowly, she turned towards the three remaining zombies, who were, despite being dead, were sweating under the intense pressure. This girl was insane!

“How env-, pitiful. How pitiful.”

*Boink?*

[Enemy has been slain! – Experience has been gained]

[Enemy has been slain! – Experience has been gained]

[Enemy has been slain! – Experience has been gained]

And there you go! 4 zombies were down! Hell yeah! Didn’t this mean that she was getting stronger now?! Haha~! This was great!!

“Alright, let’s go!!”