AN: So, last night, I had a dream.

Then I promptly forgot it.

...

Don't know what you were expecting.

But, what happened next was that my muses beat the shit out of me until I remembered.

...so I guess things worked out in the end...?

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Lichs' POV

Let us review the situation.

A gigantinormus(Yes that's a word, don't look it up) army was attacking a city I happened to be in, so I decided to help out.

I, as the idiot I am, jumped off the wall in a spurt of moronic courage, only to find I regretted all that encompassed my self.

Then, the fire mage known as Abbicus The Flamboyant smartly beat me down in a contest of magic, and now I am preparing to metaphorically and literally sell my soul to the devil.

...

I believe the 'scientific' phrase for what I am experiencing is "Fuckious My Lifious."

"Are you ready?"

Putting my arms beneath me and pushing off the ground, I nodded.

"Stand as I show you."

Standing with my feet parallel and shoulder length apart, I faced Abbicus with my left side.

"Extend your arm."

Raising my left arm to the side and pointing it at Abbicus, I opened my fingers.

"Now speak the words I tell you."

Hearing the grating voice from within speaking words of destruction, I found myself shaking.

Shortly after agreeing to the deal, I forgot what I paid. And the feeling of not knowing what I had given up...

It was enough to make me tremble in terror.

Dutifully opening my mouth, I spoke words that blazed a trail of fire across my mind.

"Pierce and Devour, Azkriel!"

Within my outstretched fingers, particles of flame and rock gathered and compressed, forming a curved pole almost as tall as me. Black metal woven with runes cold as ice fell into my fingers, and flaming red chasms tore with rending force across its' surface so hot my hand was burnt just by holding it. Black and red protrusions poked out from all along the pole, giving the impression of thorns.

Between the two tips of the pole, a black thread extended. And when my fingers held the finished piece...

Error: Insufficient level.

Solution: Compensation has been provided. Object -Azkriel- has been successfully summoned.

I held a demonic bow, a black staff that looked as if an inner fire had torn chasms of magma across its' surface.

Abbicus froze in the action of drinking a blue liquid from a bottle, and looked at the weapon in my hand.

"Ah...so that is what you were hiding. That's so unfair! How come I don't have one!"

Such a child. "haha! Take that, stupid face! I totally have something you don't!"

But wait...what am I going to shoot?

"Hold your hand to the side."

Putting my right arm to the side, I felt the same elements gathering within my enclosed fingers. A straight black shaft with wicked fletchings, and a barbed tip to rend flesh. Putting the nock onto the string, I laid the arrow against Azkriel and pulled back, placing my thumb on my cheek.

Focusing down on Abbicus, I smiled. "Eat this, bastard!"

I released, and the arrow scraped against the bow with the sound of a tortured soul. Abbicus went white, and the arrow closed in.

He raised his hands, preparing to defend-

And the arrow flew three feet to his left, sinking into the ground.

"..."

"..."

*facepalm* "Are you serious? I don't believe it..."

'Shut up! I've never shot a bow before, can you blame me?'

"Yes."

'...'

"Hah, do I have to do everything for you?"

Abbicus burst out laughing, tears running down his face. "haha! I can't believe it! You were all cool, and you summoned-and then you made-and then-hahaha!"

Another arrow formed.

"Are you seriously going to try again? LOL!"

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It was placed against the bow, and the arrow was pulled back.

"Ha! You would be intimidating if you could actually hit the side of a barn-"

The arrow fired, howling through the air with the wail of the damned.

He flinched, then cast a ward and strengthened his Aura.

The arrow hit the ward-

And punched through as if nothing had been there. It continued on into Abbicus' Aura, and lodged halfway through. He breathed deep breaths, then assumed his superior smile once more. "Hah! Even if you can hit me, it's not like you can do anything with it!"

Then he took on a face of surprise, and looked once more at the arrow. As we watched, it ate his Aura, seeming to drain his magic. He became frantic, and put more mana into his Aura while looking on in fear as the arrow hungrily absorbed his power. He drank one bottle of blue stuff, then another, then another. Then his hands fumbled and he dropped the bottle, breaking it on the ground. His face froze in terror, and ducked.

Then his Aura disappeared, and the arrow dropped innocently to the ground. We both looked on, and as one-

We began our fight anew.

I, with my arms guided by an unseen force, and him, drinking a blue liquid. He would cast multiple barriers to stop my arrows momentum, and shoot fireballs in between my shots.

I ducked and rolled, feeling the heat fly over my head, then come up on one knee and fire at his belly. He would block the arrow with one hand, while drinking more blue liquid. Then it dawned on me.

He had gotten more confident, and made his barriers quite small to save mana. Now that he had done this, maybe I could...

Reading my thoughts, two arrows materialized in my hand. They were nocked and drawn, and when they were released, Abbicus blocked one-

And the other shot his hand as he tried to drink.

When I felt victory was at hand-

Error: Due to the imperfect summon, the object -Azkriel- has been canceled early.

With a crack, my bow disintegrated. Abbicus and I looked into each others eyes.

He fumbled with his left hand into his robes, and I sprinted toward him.

He took out a blue bottle.

He raised it to his lips-

He drank-

He turned, a victorious smile on his face-

To see me, a four-foot little girl, with my hand pulled back.

He had time to say one thing. "What-"

Then I slapped him across the face. "BITCH!"

He flew a few feet, rolling on the ground, and coming to a face-grinding halt. I followed up, preparing to finish him off.

He seemed dazed, and when he saw me come over to him, he paled in fear. I grabbed him by the shirt, and broke his other hand. He seemed to need them to cast magic, from what I had seen.

"Please don't kill me!"

"...rly? I expected more from someone who calls himself a villain. Die like a true man!"

"B-but I don't want to!"

Looking at his pitiful existence, I couldn't summon the sadistic side of myself. I was just too tired.

"Fine. Take off your clothes and leave everything here, then go away."

"R-really?" He looked up with puppy eyes.

I sighed, then threw him to the side. "Yes, now get out of my sight before i change my mind!"

Watching him undressing with two broken hands was quite entertaining, and when he hopped onto his horse buck-naked and rode away, I laughed out loud when he forgot to raise his pelvis up off the horse. His high-pitched squeal of pain was like music to my ears.

Turning back to my gate, I swaggered back to my gate, only for something strange to happen.

Seventeen of the skeletons I had placed on the wall suddenly left my control, without my order.

As this happened, the horsemen that had come with Abbicus retreated from the gate, too busy to notice a small girl walking back to the gate. When I entered the courtyard...

What I say made my frozen lips twitch.

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So, since I will be starting another project soon, (nanowrimo) I just thought I'd tell you about it. "Fiery Pits of Failure" will be its' name, and I might provide a link if I don't feel too lazy. though, I doubt anyone would want to read it, considering it will be super bad...