Hello again. It's been a loooong day.

First I got woken up by Onica before the sun rose. She had been keeping watch all night. Too excited to sleep I suppose.

Anyway, she woke me when a whole bunch of idiots, with what I hope was dirt rubbed on their faces, tried to assault the dummy tents Onica had set up outside our actual tree shaped refuge. When I had questioned the need for such a trick she gave me that hungry smile and said "Let us give them a target to gather around. So we can gut them all at once."

Hard to argue with that smile.

They must've been pretty freaked out by our antics the other day, not that I really blame them. They got as close as they dared and they fired salvo after salvo of barbed and poison daubed arrows into the three tents. Ripping them to shreds and presumably murderizing anyone inside of them.

Then a few came closer to the (possible) carnage. Very slowly they crept up to the tattered remnants of the cheap canvas tents we had found somewhere along the way.

I seriously don't recall where we picked them up. Judging from the doodles drawn all over the canvas, probably by Lena, we had them for quite a while. Anyway, they were scrap now.

So when they got close enough, and I had woken up enough to feel like doing anything, long red roots whipped out of the ground. Snagged them by their ankles and left them dangling and screaming in the air.

I managed to net pretty much all the others in my root web. By that point we were all awake. Hard to sleep when 30-40 grown men are screaming like little girls not ten feet from your bed.

So we had some breakfast, and watched the sunrise from the top of out 'tree'.

Quite lovely really.

The dark sky growing gray, then crimson and yellow hues chased with violets and magentas. Then the great firey orb breaks free of the horizon and blues wash out the grays. Leaving the joyful interplay between blue skies and white clouds.

Would have been nicer without all the screaming though.

I decided to leave the 'tree' as it was. Using some greater roots as floppy floopy feet and stringing our new guests along the bare crimson branches. Like some kind of unsettling blood red tree adorned with oddly noisy fleshy fruit we wandered into the woods. Scaring the fur off of the local wildlife.

Soon enough we drew attention. Well, the yelling and cursing men with very red faces hanging from the branches of the moving red tree does kind of draw the eye.

A few failed ambushes and rescue attempts later we had managed to negotiate a meeting with the Vultioc House Head.

A dignified looking elder, the Head of House Vultioc was an earnest man with a rich mane of white hair. He wore deep green robes with the tails of foxes making a mantle over his shoulders. He looked me in the eyes without a hint of fear or worry in his gaze.

Seemed like a nice enough fella, so we offered him some lunch.

After some fish and berries we discussed terms. We offered him complete and utter surrender, he refused. He offered us places as servants in his hall, we refused.

Then Julius blew up a tree.

Under the waving shadows of the new bonfire we accepted the Vultiocs full and complete surrender.

Ugh, thats when all the work began. 

First, we had to ferry some family and the Head himself to Morana. Which took way longer than it should since I managed to get lost and we went in the exact opposite direction for two hours. After Lena took charge I sulked and drove the Ivers Dream in the proper direction.

When we got back we tried to drop off our charges, get our prize, and get out. But no, Morana somehow managed to talk us into helping 'finish the job' as she put it. She had to gather all living House Heads, or their heirs, accept their surrender in front of the rest of their fallen frienemys, and then hold a coronation. 

You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

All I wanted was that map we had been promised, and a long soak in some hot water. Followed by a huge meal and a long nap.

Instead I had to wear this horrible purple monstrosity they called formal wear. It was as ugly as it was uncomfortable. Its fabric was hot and itchy and the neck dealy poked the soft flesh under my jaw mercilessly with overly starched blades of cloth.

As the nominated victim leader of our team I was the only one who had to be present at the coronation. The others were going to the feast that was being thrown to try and smooth any ruffled feathers for the defeated soldiers. Similar parties were being held throughout the kingdom. For the commoners this was a celebration of the crowning of a new Queen, and the end of them being pressed into armies and killed. So they partied hard. The defeated soldiers drank with the victorious and swapped stories. Letting out the bad blood and allowing fresh ties to be made.

Some people wouldn't be satisfied or happy. But then, some people are never happy. Not our problem anyway. 

Meanwhile, in the capital city, whose name I had never gotten, of the kingdom, whose name I cannot freaking remember, there was a different kind of party going on.

In the palace ballroom men and woman with stiff backs and skyward noses sashayed about. Possibly to the beat of the squealing shrieking band in the corner. More likely to whatever melody they imagined the sweating amatuers were attempting to murder so zealously.

A small table held a heavily liquored bowl of punch and a platter of tiny and tastless canapes. Not exactly the dinner I had hoped for. I snuck off to a shadowed corner and snuck some roasted fish and cool water from my satchel. Which I had stashed under the uncomfortable jacket I had been shoehorned into.

Midway through my clandestine dinner a series of trumpet blasts echoed off into the night, announcing the approach of the soon to be queen. Morana walked into the ballroom. Wearing a simple and comfortable looking purple dress. She still looked more like a baker or sleepy librarian than a queen. That image of unregality was smashed into dust when the finey dressed and coiffed Heads of the other houses and their families all knelt before her. Her simple outfit suddenly seemed like understated elegance. Her calm sleepy eyes the cool gaze of an experienced executioner sizing up the neck of their newest charge as she ran it across her new subordinates.

At that point she led the glamorous procession into the throne room. A man in overlarge ivory robes lifted a simple circlet with seven beautiful gems in the color of the rainbow from a satin pillow and knelt before her. Offering her the crown. The Heads and heirs stepped forward from the crowd. They formed a semicircle behind Morana Somursa and knelt as she lifted the crown and placed it on her own head.

A symbol of conquest rather than bestowment. Only kings and queens who won their kingdom in conflict could place the crown on their own head.

As she turned around her round visage and sleepy eyes became something more. Her curves became graceful and grand. Her sleepy gaze charged with power and possibilty. All bowed deeper as she cast her eyes on them. The proudly kneeling nobels became subservient, the would-be kings became servile. All knelt before their Queen!

Well, except me of course. I was still standing off to one side and behind Morana, silently watching as our bargain was completed.

I could feel the eyes of some of the kneeling nobles focus on me in my place near the throne. More and more gazes converged on me as the angry eyes of the subservient demanded I join them. 

Thats when it happened.

I got the hiccups. Probably from when I got surprised by the trumpets and stuffed the rest of the fish down my throat followed by chugging cold water to force it down.

My body jerked straight and a *hiccup* burst from my lips. 

The sudden movement and sound from me caught the glaring nobles so off guard that most flinched and shifted their gaze from me. Especially the Bosvarum and Vultioc. They had suffered the most from me personally. The fat Bosvarum Head paled and trembled, and the aged Vultioc Head narrowed his hard gaze and looked at the ground.

Some more hiccups later and finally it came time to get my reward for bringing a Queen her crown.

She handed over a old weathered piece of folded leather. Inside was a tattered piece of parchment that looked like the doodling of a blind madman.

I accepted it and skedaddled.

I couldn't make heads nor tails of it but Lena  Fen, and Onica huddled around it and started talking in eldritch terms about longitudes and tradewinds and other stuff I don't know how to spell.

A few minutes into that mess and I decided to put some distance between us and our former employer. Just in case she was less keen about keeping her end of the deal now that she was a high and mighty royal.

So while they pondered the messy map I molded the Ivers Dream into a massive red carriage with huge firey wheels. I rocketed some fire out of the back and soon we were zipping off into the countryside. 

I had never driven a carriage before, and the sun had already sunk below the horizon leaving the world dark without its rays. So I think I did pretty well all things considered. 

I only crashed into four trees, five boulders, one cliff, and I only flipped the carriage five times.

By that point it was long into the night so I finally decided to let my complaining friends sleep in peace. So I broke out my trusty journal and wrote todays events. The day will be over. Right after I drive us off this cliff and into the river at the bottom of it.

That seems like a good idea, this way we keep moving all night!

Thats smarts right there! 

We might have been having some fun but I am ready to get out of here. I don't like sitting still this long, that time in Papil nearly drove me mad.

So onwards! Into the lovely unknown and away from everything we understand!

TO ADVENTURE!!!

Goodnight.