Ugh. Hi.

I woke today up hip deep inside the mouth of a massive slither.

I am covered in spit, venom, shit, and puke.

Good morning to me.

In addition, my head freaking kills, and I am covered in bug bites and stings.

And I am naked again.

*sigh*

What happened?

Looking at my journal entry from last night I guess I ate a fruit of some kind?

The "superslither" must be the poor beastie that tried to eat me. With notably poor results.

The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Following the blatantly obvious path I burned through the tall grass in my mindless frenzy I found my clothes and supplies again.

I also found a massive hive of stinging insects I seem to have stomped on.

That explained the bug bites and stings.

Why didn't a swarm of biting stinging bugs warrant even a single word in my journal?

Backtracking further I find a likey culprit of yesterdays loss.

A large yellow fruit. Shaped vaguely like a pair of clasped hand and covered in very fine hairs.

Why would I even try to eat this thing?

I name it the kafizzle fruit. Because when you eat it, all your plans go up in smoke.

I like it. The name, not the fruit. I'm never eating that again.

Ever.

I spent the rest of the day trying to find a river to clean all the crud off of me. I had no such luck and had to settle for burning it off.

I know I get just as clean, if not cleaner, when I bathe in flame. But nothing is as relaxing as a soak in clean water. And I could use some relaxation.

I may have overreacted with those birds the other day.

Oh yeah, what am I gonna call those anyway?

Well, they don't burn. So maybe Firebane birds? Or... Big shiny bird who doesn't burn? BSBWDB... Basbawodobe?

EIther or I suppose.

Its late, I'm tired, and I didn't get anything done today.

I think I hate getting kafizzled.

Goodnight.