Name: (Words) = Thinking (usually reserved for third person perspectives).
Words~ = Sing-song voice.
Words/ = Monotone voice.
*Words* = Sound effects/actions.
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Sitting Room - Charlotte’s Apartment - The next day, evening
Ah, welcome back. Hold on a second while I’m bundling these mana crystals together. There, done! Why am I bundling mana crystals? I uhhh… obtained some ebooks from the internet, and giving them to the Goddesses to distribute in dungeons? I’m doing it this way, because I don’t want to be known as the person that brought all this knowledge to the world… And, it’s only basic stuff like mathematics, engineering, chemistry, anatomy, farming, and a few other odds and ends. You know, all the stuff most people skip over because of magic… Magic is nice and all, but people tend to cut corners because of it. Aren’t I cutting corners? I am, but I understand how to do it the other way, and why it happens. Ah! I heard one of you say something about pirating copyrighted materials? Too bad, I’m downloading them from Earth, and this isn’t Earth is it? Nope, digital world on another planet. But I will turn myself in if they ever leave their solar system, and show up to arrest me. I’ll start holding my breath now…
I’m actually kind of mad right now at the system… [Cosplayer] is a great class, but it’s a little grindy… Sarah received a [Marksman] class after that little heist. She gets freaking stat growth on level up, along with whatever individual stat gains she received… Of course, it’s only an increase of one in Agility, Perception, and Dexterity. But still, it’s the principle of it! Her talent tree is only two branches, and a complete ripoff of Midas and I’s, without the cosmetic branch… I don’t know why they call it a Talent tree, it’s more of a leveling tool. She’s only level 8, so I had her dump her points for passives and class learning. Which brings us to my next rage inducing rant: HER PASSIVES! Show them Artemis!
[table=purple]Sarah PassivesDexterity/Agility/PerceptionMarksman+20% Ranged Weapon DamageThreat DetectionConcentration: Allows you to passively regenerate ki.[/table]
Passively regenerate ki!!! That’s so broken! You normally have to meditate, or use breathing techniques to regenerate it, but nope, she just sits on her ass and it shows up for doing nothing! I need to calm down! I summon a guard, and hand her the package to have delivered to Rhea’s temple here in Odin. Now to go find the self-proclaimed Maid, and ask her what kind of weapons she wants. Now how do I find her? Create Party? Invite Sarah to party? THERE’S NO PARTY SYSTEM?! Hold on a second...
Dear Developers
Can you please implement a party system? That is one of the most basic things of any game…
I know I usually complain about the Lore Department, but someone else dropped the ball this time… Oh! Before I forget, please punch in the face whoever thought it was a good idea to put rednecks in this game… Repeatedly… With extreme prejudice.
Love, Tyche
Maybe I can find her using her tablet? I bring up the Stalk’em app, which shows her tablet to be... On the table in front of me… Crap, didn’t give that to her yet. So the old fashioned way? I run out of the apartment, to find the guard… That I sent away on an errand earlier… Are guards designed to be there only to be a hindrance? Usually they are all over the place when you don’t want them to be, but when you want one? Nowhere to be seen. OH! Chatroom! I load up the Chatty app, and enter the Palace chatroom.
[table=black]ChattyUsername:FoxInABawxChatroom:OdinRoyalPalace***
_Connected
_Joining room "OdinRoyalPalace"
_Please input password:
FoxInABawx> ***********
_Joined
*Welcome to #OdinRoyalPalace 36 users online!*
John> Come on, just once?
Caroline> No! Leave me alone!
FoxInABawx> Want me to take care of it?
Caroline> Yes please.
John> Take care of what?
Caroline> You, jackass!
John> You can't do squat to me!
FoxInABawx> Really?
Name: John *****
Age: 18
Address: Guard Barracks Bunk 13
Occupation: Guard
Fetish: Buttplug self-insertion
John> No! How'd you get that?
Leroy> REKT!
John> Wait! I don't do that with buttplugs!
*John has been banned from this room*
Caroline> Thanks for that.
FoxInABawx> No probs. Seen Sarah?
Caroline> Her... She's with the Princess and Midas, heading to the cabin’s bath...
FoxInABawx> Does she know that Midas is a guy?
Caroline> Pfffft WAIT FOR ME, I WANNA WATCH![/table]
As I get up from the couch, Caroline bursts from the bedroom and almost knocks me over in her rush for the door. So that’s where you were hiding… I follow her, because this is going to be hilarious!
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Hot Spring Bath - Spatial Cabin - Midas PoV
Haaaa~ Hot spring, never leave me~! Hello there! I spent all day training with Sarah while Tyche is crafting and setting up stuff for the ranch we own now. Charlotte stopped by at the end, because she loves the hot spring as much as I do. I’m currently sitting in the middle of the spring, leaning back on my arms. Charlotte is sitting between my legs, leaning back into my chest. I should ask Tyche to invent sake, you can’t have hot springs without sake!
The training went really well! I strapped light weights to Sarah’s legs, wrists, and waist and had her run around the palace grounds. I spent a good three hours compiling different training techniques from anim… strenuous researching.
Why are there hands groping my chest? I’m a guy now, go lower! Charlotte should know better! Must be Coraline, she must have decided to join us, and grabbed me by accident… I grab her hands, and pull them forward to rest on Charlotte’s chest and HOLY SHIT! THOSE ARE MASSIVE! Two massive holy objects are now smashed into my back! Tyche’s and Charlotte’s are nice, but they don’t compare to these! The weird thing is, I don’t know who they belong to… Lilian is smaller than Charlotte… Caroline and Coraline are little bigger than Charlotte. And Tyche is the biggest I know off… This is a mystery! While contemplating the phantom boobies, the mysterious hands move back to my chest, travel right down to my shaft and freeze…
Tyche: “She didn’t know?”
Caroline: “Totally didn’t know…”
Charlotte: “Didn’t know what?”
Midas: “Is this the feeling you get all the time Tyche? Where it just burns?”
Tyche: “Yep!”
Sarah: “KYAA~!”
Tyche: “OW!”
OW! My ears! I mean OW! My Junk! Stop squeezing! slkdhfksldjf OW OW OW OW OW OW!
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Tyche PoV
This is everything I thought it would be! And the moment is gone… Midas is now floating in the water like a corpse, while Sarah is floating next to him with foam coming out of her mouth, her hand still on his staff… Okay, the moment is back! Pffft!
Charlotte: “What didn’t she know?”
Caroline: “That he was a guy…”
Tyche: “AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.
Charlotte: “Didn’t you rescue her from a kidnapping for a forced marriage?”
Tyche: *gasp* “...yes…” *gasp*
Charlotte: “She’s probably still traumatized from that, and you’re laughing at her?”
Tyche: “Didn’t think about that…”
And the moment is gone again… I really didn’t think about that… Oops… What did I originally come down here for again? Let’s take her with me, I’ll probably remember then. I grab her free hand, and try to drag her to the door, but she’s still grasping tightly onto Midas, causing him to drag with her… Must… Not… Laugh… I carefully remove her hand from his staff, as I didn’t want to break it, and drag her out into the changing room. Holy shit those puppies are huge! I’m not a licensed boobologist, but I’m estimating that they are at least E-Cups… Hold on a second… [Inspect]...
Self-Proclaimed Maid Breasts: Breasts belonging to the Self-Proclaimed Maid Marksman Sarah.
They have been wrapped since she hit puberty to hide their size.
Size: E-Cup --- Quality: Divine
I was right, must be the Intellect speaking? Or is it the perception? Anyway~ Let’s get her dressed! I conjure a fireball with a dome of wind around it, and rotate it. If I was an annoying ninja, I would slam it into things, but I need a blow dryer more than a retarded suicide attack… Fully dry, I bring over her Maid Uniform, and stop, because we have nothing to cover her breasts with… No more wrappings for these puppies, as that is heresy! I fetch an armored corset from my inventory, and put it on her. Watching clothing resize itself to fit someone is really weird looking. Although weird to watch, I am thankful for it! Killing a raid boss or something, and finding out the robe you received doesn’t fit is a total buzzkill… The same system that prevents said corset from squeezing your innards too! You get the shape, but without the health defects! Back to dressing the Maid… I put the uniform back on her, and surprised myself! Big breasted Maid is pretty hot! I pick her up and take her back to Charlotte’s sitting room… Ah, that’s it! I wanted her opinions for what weapons she will use… Screw it, I’ll ask the Artemis, she’s been binge watching WebVidz with Selene lately… I drop her on the couch, and find the Fairies in front of the “big screen” which is a tablet on it’s side for them to watch.
Tyche: “Ah, I was looking for you, I need ideas for what weapons I will make for Sarah.”
Artemis: “What class was she again?”
Tyche: “Just give us her stats please, it will go faster.”
[table=purple]StatusLevel:24Race:ChimeraClass:CosplayerHP:994Mana/Psy:1100Ki:1557Stamina1090Tyche Luck:MAXMidas Luck:MINTycheTitles:Twin-SoulChuunibyouInheritor of MjolnirFemaleIt's a trap!Princess of ChimerasMidasTitles:Twin-SoulChuunibyouChampion of DumbassMaleIt's a trap!Prince of ChimerasPhysicalAgility:45Strength:29DefensiveConstitution:41Endurance:45MentalIntellect:45Wisdom:35OtherDexterity:32Perception:30Spirit:63AffinitiesBacon:100%Muffin:100%Light:60%Dark:60%Nature:45%Spatial:100%Elemental:30%------[/table]
Tyche: “That’s mine… We want Sarah’s…”
Artemis: “Don’t do extras, the deal is for you and Midas only.”
Tyche: “What will it cost me?”
Artemis: “We want our own room!”
Selene: “And we want Sarah to clean it!”
Tyche: “Deal! One love nest for the Fairies! Pick one of the empty ones in the Cabin, and try to find one here if you want one.”
[table=purple]StatusName:SarahRace:HumanClass:MarksmanLevel:8Titles:MaidFemaleHP:98Mana:116Ki:138Stamina:82PhysicalAgility:18Strength:5DefensiveConstitution:11Endurance:9MentalIntellect:12Wisdom:12OtherDexterity:20Perception:20Spirit:15Luck:15Affinities:Wind:10%------[/table]
Artemis: “Make her some guns like your Phaser. Hold on a second.”
She flies over to the tablet, and opens up a few tabs in the browser. After some begging from the two of them, I set them up with a connection to the wifi implant… I let them have it, because they know first hand what punishment they will receive if they misuse my trust. Artemis finds what she is looking for and shows them to me. Holy crap, that is cool!
Artemis: “Sleeve guns are cool!”
Tyche: “What’s that other one?”
Artemis: “Something for mid to long range, couldn’t you shorten the barrel, and switch the stock with one of those foldy ones?”
Tyche: “Thanks, I’ll be in the personal space. Got lots of crap to make…”
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Personal Space
Meh, she is getting cooler guns than I have in [Dandere Mode]... This is a travesty! While I’m complaining, I start digging around in the piles of metal for a decent sized thick wire for the folding stock. Once I found that, I move to the special wood pile, and pick out some ironwood, for the body of the guns. Ironwood is exactly as it’s name states, wood that is hard as iron… But only when the wood itself is completely dry. After that, it somehow seals itself, so it stays hard permenantly. We have it stored in containers of water, to keep them “woodlike” for easy carving. Last, I grab some iron rods, for the “barrels” more like ki barrel, but that’s what it is… I get to work.
What are they? You’ll have to wait, they are in the oven, getting the water baked out! While that is happening, I start gathering the other projects for the ranch that we have in the works: cow milker, mana powered sheep shears, butter churner, and a fridge! Ah, the timer dinged! Hold on, need to paint the gun parts, and put them back in the oven. Back, while they are cooking again, I add an interspatial ring, and a holster for one gun to the one pile for Sarah. *Ding!* Oh! Assembly time!
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Sitting room
Tyche: “Here you go, your weapons, interspatial ring, and a few other odds and ends.”
I hand over two Ki Guns on wrist sliders that are popular with assassins. Then, I hand over what looks like a sawn off lever action rifle. Since it’s a ki gun, you don’t have to bother with the long barrel, or bullet storage… I did like Artemis suggested, and gave it a folding stock that flips over the top of the gun. I plan on having the holster be attached to the backside of her apron, so it’s concealed. Sarah looks like she’s about to pass out for some reason.
Sarah: “I can’t accept these! They must have been expensive…”
Tyche: “Not really, Midas and I are well off, and I crafted most of those myself. Except for the Interspatial Ring, that was from one of the bandits.”
At the mention of Midas’ name, Sarah goes beet red, and stops talking. Ugh… This is awkward… Let’s go excuse ourselves and ask around about dungeons for the next part of our plan!
Tyche: “Well, I’m going to go ask around to see if there’s a dungeon nearby. We can use it to level you up, and to say we “found” a few things…”
Sarah: *wakes up* “There’s a zombie dungeon a mile outside of Peckerwood. We can go there can’t we?”
Tyche: “Even better, I guess it’s bedtime then?”
Sarah: “C-c-can I sleep with you tonight?”
Awwww, she’s blushing even fiercer this time! I take it she doesn’t want to sleep with Midas, so let’s leave him here with Charlotte, and we can take the cabin? Yeah, let’s do it that way...
Tyche: “Sure? Let me go tell Midas that we’ll be in the cabin, he can stay here with Charlotte.”
She’s blushing even fiercer now… Isn’t that dangerous? Can you pop a vein from blushing? It’s only sleeping together, nothing can go wrong right? Shit… I just triggered a flag damnit! Hey! Don’t leave me! Tell me everything will be fine! Bastard come back!
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Author’s Notes: I remember someone asked about the stats of another player, so here you go: Sarah! She’s going to be awkward to write for at least a few more chapters, but I can always go back and fix things if need be. Next chapter will jump straight to the dungeon.