Name: (Words) = Thinking (usually reserved for third person perspectives).
Words~ = Sing-song voice.
Words/ = Monotone voice.
*Words* = Sound effects/actions.
I can’t believe I was sleep deprived enough to mix up Kuudere and Dandere… Anyway~ I fixed that.
---
Chesterwood Temple Stairs
Good evening! We are currently climbing this stone staircase up to the temple. Why? So that they could teach me the finer parts of the priest trade. I take out two fairies from my vest-bra-armor thingy that I will now dub an armored corset, as the priests or priestesses will be more likely to teach me if I want to purge the Fairynip from their system. Who is this second fairy you ask? It’s the same one from last time. Midas wanted to name her Tyra Biggums, but I gave him a thwack, and after a quick search on Wikipedia for Greek Goddesses, I named her Artemis. The name caused her to evolve into a Nature Fairy. Yay! The top of the stairs are in sight, I thought they would go on forever!
Male: “INTRUDERS!”
A blur shoots towards Midas, and kicks him down the mountain. Wait, what? Not understanding what was happening, [Yandere Mode] automatically activates, and I run behind the monk and I swing Mjolnir right between his legs. As he flies up, I conjure a portal above and beneath him so he falls infinitely. As if it was an afterthought, I turn around and summon a portal where Midas where will land, and another one over the pond next to the temple.
Monk: *cough* “BLURRRRRRRGHHGHGHGHG” *cough*
Midas: “KYAAAAAAAAAA!” *splash*
I revert back to [Neutral Mode], and skip over to the pond to fish out my hubby who is hilariously drowning in ankle deep water... He looks like a soaked cat, which is pretty adorable. Oi! Don’t wrap your chest with bandages, that will cause misunderstandings! Midas and I turn around to watch the spectacle of a Monk falling infinitely while puking. I pull a blanket, picnic basket, and my harp from our inventory. Midas starts setting up the picnic for an art viewing, while I try to think of a good song for this situation.
Tyche: “This was a triumph~ I'm making a note here:~ HUGE SUCCESS~”
Female: “What are you doing here?”
Midas: “Having a picnic.”
Tyche: “Appreciating fine artwork. I call it ‘look before you step’”
Midas: “Punishing a criminal.”
Tyche: “Dammit, I was gonna say that one.”
Female: “Let me rephrase that, WHY are you here?”
Tyche: “Oh, why didn’t you ask that the first time? I’m here to learn the healing arts, to cure our fairies. Hold on a second-”
The monk is trying to do something with his Ki, so I activate [Dandere Mode] and shoot him a few times with the phaser which is set to stun. He shrieks, and goes back to falling forever. This surprises the Shrine Maiden who was talking to us.
Shrine Maiden: “How are you using your Ki that way, why do I feel a strong Ki from both of you, and what sect are you from?”
Tyche: “Phaser./” *holds up phaser* “Found inside./” *points to stomach* “Muffin, Bacon, Blueberry./”
Shrine Maiden: “Why is she talking like that?”
Midas: “Oh, that’s just a personality trait of hers, watch~.”
Midas goes up to me, and hugs me from behind. My practice has paid off, since my face and mood remains emotionless. Then, the cheater breaks out the big guns and nibbles my ear. My cheeks turn scarlet, [Tsundere Mode] activates, I grab his collar, and toss him over my shoulder.
Tyche: “Bastard! W-w-what are you doing?” *thwack* *thwack* *thwack*
Shrine Maiden: “What are you doing! How dare you defile a Shrine Maiden’s chastity?”
Chastity? What is that, is it tasty? That ship has sailed a few days ago, crashed into an iceberg, and pushed off the door to make room for awesome toe curling sex. Spoiler alert: That’s the best kind of sex.
Tyche: “Wait, that whole ‘chastity’ thing is important?”
Shrine Maiden: “What do you mean ‘is it important?’ It’s something indicative of being a Shrine maiden! I’m surprised your goddesses haven’t smote you yet!”
Meh… I’m really close to just getting rid of her, and then ransack the place for their scrolls, sacred texts and whatnot, but I won’t. I conjure a portal under all of us, and we fall into our Inventory.
Tyche: “Jesse Spencer! We need to talk!”
Shrine Maiden: “Who is Jesse Spencer! Where are we? Why are you breaking your Sect’s regulations?”
Tyche: “Jesse Spencer is the Beastkin Goddess, we are in Midas and I’s [Personal Space], and no regulations were broken.”
Shrine Maiden: “Lies!”
I walk over to a bookshelf, and grab a thin leather bound book. I hand it to her, and she opens it and reads aloud:
Muffin, Bacon, and Blueberry Sect Rules and Regulations:
* Don’t Rape.
* Pillage all you want.
* Killing is cool too.
* If you find the Blueberry Goddess, please report to Mammon in the village of Dolon.
Shrine Maiden: “Why is the rest of the book full of recipes? This is fake isn’t it?”
Jesse Spencer: “That’s because her Father wrote it that way. And no, it’s legitimate, as he created the sect.”
Shrine Maiden/Midas: “KYAAAA!” *hugs each other*
The sight of this irritates me to no end. [Yandere Mode] activates, and I point Mjolnir at them.
Tyche: “Any last words?”
Midas: *groveling at my feet* “I REPENT!”
The sight of this pleases me, but I still have to puni- murder this bitch who dares to intrude on my territory. I lift Mjolnir higher about to fix the problem.
Jesse Spencer: “Please don’t kill my Shrine Maiden. I kind of like her, despite her flaws.”
Tyche: “You are lucky that your Goddess likes you Lizzie, any other person would be dead by now.”
Lizzie: “How did you know my name?”
Because you are a Lizardkin? Your template just reeks of orphan, and orphans in temples get terribly cliche names.
Tyche: “Moving on… Jesse Spencer, make her teach me stuff.”
Jesse Spencer: “I’ll tea-”
Lizzie: “No, this isn’t ‘moving on’. Tell me why?”
Tyche: “Moving on…” *hands Jesse Spencer the harisen*
Jesse Spencer: “I’ll tea-”
Lizzie: “Tell me no- ACK! OW!”
Jesse Spencer: “As I was trying to say, I’ll teach you. Lizzie and her associate will teach Midas hand to hand combat.”
A fully clean, but soaking wet monk appears on the ground next to Lizzie. Oi! You drop babies, but not people from your own temple!
---
Training - Ki
Ki training is really boring, but the good part is that you only have to meditate until you purify your Ki levels. But you have to meditate every time more is added, so if you stay on top of things, you only have to cultivate maybe once or twice a day for a short period of time. The best part is, meditation isn’t some slow process like you see in all those mangas and novels, you just have to be dutiful, not hellbent on it.
Ki manipulation is almost exactly the same as Mana/Psy manipulation, so I will skip this.
---
Training - Talismans
This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
Talismans are the key point to being a Shrine Maiden, most of the other crap is just stuff invented to keep them from goofing off. She tried to teach me about a dozen kanji, but I learned all of them them the first time we were in Casa de Madre. Surprised about this, she continued the training, and taught me about ink.
You place some of your blood in an inkstone, which is just a stone container used to grind ink sticks, and mix them together. Why does it have to be your blood? Because your ki doesn’t know jack shit about other people’s blood. I excuse myself from Jesse Spencer, and walk over to Midas. Without asking, I knick his forearm, and fill a few vials with his blood. While corking the vials, I emit some light attribute mana to the wound to heal him. I walk back to the inkstone, and withdraw some vials from my forearm too. I mix one of each of our vials together, pour a little into the inkstone, and start grinding a stick of ink on it until I was told to stop. Then I mix the blood and ink together, and pour the result into an inkwell.
The talismans are ridiculously easy to make… You just use a brush to draw a circle, draw the needed character in the middle, draw a line down to a slightly smaller circle, draw the character for “release” and then channel some Ki into it to charge it... Completely disappointed with how easy it is, I start to experiment. I decide to use one of the characters she didn’t teach me. I chose cold, taking the finished over to Lizzie, I place it on her forehead, I form the needed hand seal while focusing on that talisman, and channel ki into it. For shits and giggles, and the extra 30% effectiveness from Chuunibyou, I shout release. Lizzie starts shivering, and lays down and enters hibernation.
Jesse Spencer: “Why am I even surprised anymore? Well, that’s everything I care to teach you.”
After she teleports away, I grin like a child who has found a new toy, and begins experimenting. My first experiment is trying to do two characters at once. I brush ((Heal)-(warmth))-(release) on a the talisman paper, and then walk over to Midas’ training to wait for him to get hurt. I decide to carve a few things that will be useful for other experiments if this works.
Ah, Midas just received an open palm strike which knocks him into the air to land in front of me. Spotting my guinea pig, I move closer, put the talisman on him, and activate it. Midas is now visibly healing.
Tyche: “Does it feel warm?”
Midas: “Yes, why?”
I ignore the question, and go back to my experiments. I attempt the same thing, but with a wooden tile, to see if paper is even needed, which it isn’t, as it was successful.
Getting really into this, I take the carved mask and rod I made earlier, and dunk them into melted wax, pull them out, and hang them to dry. While they dry, I dig through one of our wood bins, and take out a block. I cut it in half, and carve them into two stamps of ((Heal)-(Purge))-(release). I bring them over and offer them to Lizzie and her cohort.
Tyche: “Dip them in your ink, and then stamp them on talisman paper.”
Monk: “That won’t work since there is no devotion involved. Blah blah blah blah blah”
Wordlessly, Lizzie take out her inkwell, dips her brush in, and paints the stamp. She stamps it onto the paper. I shake the talismans dry, and then withdraw the fairies from my armored corset. I wrap them in it and place them on the ground. Getting the hint, Lizzie activates them. My two fairies wiggle out of the depleted talismans, and yawn.
Artemis: “That was a great nap.”
Selene: “HEY! Just don’t sprinkle Fairynip on an unknowing girl!”
I activate [Denial], grab the fairies, and stick them in a drill each. I head back to my carvings and find that they are dry. I begin carving through the wax into the wood of the mask the following: ((distort)-(vibration))-(channel).
Artemis: “Whatcha doing?”
Selene: “Probably something cheaty. She’s good for that.”
Tyche: “Awwww~ You know me so well.”
Selene: “That wasn’t a compliment. Who are you?”
Tyche: “That’s Artemis, a recovering fairynip addict Nature Fairy we picked up while you were out.”
Selene: “Did she…”
Tyche: “Yep, she posted our stats once.”
Selene: “WHAAA? I WAS OFF THE JOB ONCE, AND YOU CHEAT ON ME?”
Artemis: “What’s the big deal, back in the old days, some adventurers had multiple fairies.”
Selene: “I’m not that kind of girl!”
Tyche: “Selene… You know that there is a Midas in this equation right?”
Selene: “Oh… Well I call dibs on you!”
Artemis: “tch! Oh well, I’ll get Midas.”
Ignoring the bickering fairies, I move on to the wooden rod. I carve in the following: (emit)-(((light)-(red))-(beam)-((length)-(3)-(shaku)))-(channel). The emit character is on one of the tops of the rod. I take the two pieces, and brush the ink over the exposed wood. I set those aside to dry, and practice the harp some more.
Tyche: ♫Dun dun dun dun dudun dun dudun♫
Artemis: Hey, that’s pretty good!”
Selene: “Yeah, she is… Why are you even learning the harp?”
Tyche: “Thanks. Because it’s fun? Do you guys know what a minstrel does?”
Artemis: “They play music for money?”
Tyche: “Well, that, but they also do other things.”
Selene: “That is completely immoral what you are planning…”
Artemis: “What? Tell me!”
Tyche: “Well, minstrels have an official capacity as a witness. Two people can reach an agreement in front of a minstrel, and it is considered legally binding. Also, it is incredibly illegal to attack a minstrel and her party.”
Artemis: “Ah…”
Yeah, she’s lost, it seems like she was born to be with Midas… Anyways, the ink is dry, so I remove the wax from it to make it look pretty. I put on the mask, hold the rod (emit side up) and walk up to Midas, and get his attention. I channel Ki into the mask and rod, making a lightsaber:
Tyche: “Midas *Ktchhhhhh Fwhooooooh* I am your father!”
Midas: “Nooo! That’s not true! … Oh wait, it is… Can I play with it now?”
I just spent three hours making those to make a joke, so of course I’m done with them. I take them off and hand them to him, and go back to my work area. I start taking notes to document this, since I have many exploity plans for this in the future~. One of you give them the stats, I’m busy at the moment.
[table=purple]StatusLevel:11Race:ChimeraClass:CosplayerHP:307Mana/Psy:339Ki:602Stamina450Tyche Luck:MAXMidas Luck:MINTycheTitles:Twin-SoulChuunibyouInheritor of MjolnirFemaleIt's a trap!MidasTitles:Twin-SoulChuunibyouChampion of DumbassMaleIt's a trap!PhysicalAgility:30Strength:17DefensiveConstitution:27Endurance:40MentalIntellect:29Wisdom:23OtherDexterity:19Perception:15Spirit:52AffinitiesBacon:100%Muffin:100%Light:60%Dark:60%Nature:45%Spatial:100%Fire:25%Earth:25%[/table]
Selene: “FUCK! Damnit!”
Artemis: “O~hohoho! Looks like someone isn’t needed?”
Selene: “Yeah, you!”
You guys should leave now, I have fairies to discipline.
Selene: *gasp* *hugs Artemis* “N-no please? We’ll play nice!”
Artemis: “What are you talking about?”
I grab a fairy by the head in each hand with two fingers...
---
Author’s Notes: Who is excited for the new Star Wars movie? Because I’m not. This is where they will start getting really OP. But this Talisman Enchanting will have to wait for their next training. Not much else to put here, so I’m out for now.