Nillous had left me to get acquainted with my new surroundings, but it felt hard to even breathe. I had gone from nothing to everything. I was forced to wear only rags, but now I had a full wardrobe of clothes.
Supposedly I could pick out anything I wanted and have the tailor adjust it to my size. Of course, given they already had my measurements from when I got my nightgown, they were pretty sure that everything would fit.
They were all brand-new clothes too, not hand-me-downs.
In the end, I felt like I would probably never get adjusted to it. It was just too much. I almost felt like a real princess if it hadn't been for my scared and battle-hardened body.
The only thing I knew I could do comfortably was go back to reading the massive book on magic, which had been conveniently placed on my new desk. Doing that made it easy to ignore everything else.
I mean, the room was nice and all, but I didn’t think it would ever feel like it was mine. For starters, I wasn’t a big fan of pink. I liked the frilly ribbons don't get me wrong, I just wished they were orange or blue. If I wanted it to, it was just one more thing that could serve as a reminder of how disconnected I was from my family.
If I was being honest though the biggest reason was because I had just spent too long living in what now felt like a completely different room. Still, the feeling of staying in a fancy hotel wasn’t a bad one either.
Sitting down in the chair that was made specifically with my height in mind and flipped open the heavy pages.
I still couldn't use any magic, not even my own, but the more I read the more it fascinated me.
Miracles, traditional, and dark magic. The book essentially summarized it into those three categories. Throughout the past few days, I had poured over the pages, trying to figure out what types were actually plausible for me.
‘Since magic is banned, that means it would have to be something invisible. Preferably something that doesn't even make my eyes glow.’
Within the pages, there were countless instructions and practices, but it didn't matter how hard I tried. My gate was broken.
‘I wonder if it talks about that too, or if it only talks about spells.’
Flipping open the index, I saw a portion of the book that read
[Magical gates, flow, and channeling.]
I quickly flipped through the pages until I found it. The section was massive, covering all kinds of channels, or spells that cost manna to maintain. Towards the end though I finally found what I was looking for. After all, it wouldn’t hurt to have already fixed the problem myself by the time my father got back. Maybe he’d even go easy on me for once.
The section basically summed up how magic worked. It was honestly a bit annoying because after reading about 7 pages on the topic, I could pretty much summarize it in one sentence.
The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.
You have manna, you use it to turn your willpower into reality, the strength and efficiency are determined by your emotions and personal connection with the desired effect. The book made it sound complicated, but if I was understanding it right, it wasn’t… Of course that didn’t mean it would be easy either.
Finally, I got to the section I was hoping for.
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“Gate” is just a term for one's ability to release manna. The phrase of the speech talking about it breaking actually refers to a much more serious problem than what it might suggest. Should someone enter this state, it means that their mind has become terrified of the harmful side effects of casting spells that would drain their manna supply to near empty.
Effectively speaking, their body shuts down all ability to use magic subconsciously. To protect itself. Should a person survive an event that causes such trauma, the only way to reverse this disability would be to put them through something equally as horrifying, triggering the body's reflex to use manna to survive.
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‘Somehow… I don’t like the sound of that…’ As I finished reading my door began creaking open. Assuming it was Mara I just leaned back in my chair, not even bothering to look. “You know, since I would be learning magic I was actually looking forward to having a bit of a break, but something tells me it will be just as hard as physical training.”
a deep grunt bellowed from across the room. I turned to see a tall and menacing figure dressed in all black. His clothes were morbid, but his face was unmistakable. “Father…” I muttered, quickly leaning forward so that all four of my chair's feet would be back on the ground.
It was the first time I had seen him since I discovered the truth. The warm man from my memories felt like he was distinctly different. He was a man with a cold exterior, but a warm soul and gentle hands that would protect the things he cherished… I was one of those things… At least that was what I used to think.
The man before me was ominous and frightening. They wore the same face and held the same expressions, but they were not the same. One man was my loving father who lived only in my imagination. The other was the man who had my own mother try to beat me till I couldn't stand.
“Siya…” His cold voice reached out to me, shaking the air between us as his expression shifted to that of an executioner pulling the hangman's noose around a child.
I pushed my chair back and stood up, facing him head-on. “Yes, father?” ‘If he’s finally here, there could be only one reason.’
He let out a low growl under his breath. “Let's go, it's time you started your training.”
Without a moment's hesitation, I followed. ‘Training… but.’ “Don’t we have to fix my magic gate first?”
He raised up three fingers. “Yes, that's step one.” He closed one finger into the rest of his hand. “Step two is teaching you the basics of magic.” He closed another, leaving only one finger left. “Step three is going to be dealing with the consequences of all the shortcuts we're going to take.”
‘I don’t like the sound of that…’ He turned, and I followed him out into the courtyard, mentally preparing myself for what I had to face. I had no idea what it would be, but if the only way to repair my gate was to go through something life-threatening, I knew it wouldn’t be anything good.
“Are you ready for step one?”
I gulped as we walked over to the opposite end, my body still void of any kind of warmth. “I’m here aren’t I?” ‘Let's just get it over with.’
He smirked. “That’s my girl.” turning to one of the walls a bright orange light began to emit from the cracks between the stone bricks. The light became brighter and brighter until the wall blew outwards, a web of magic intertwining each stone. Each brick then slowly folded out to the side creating a secret door.
‘Magic is forbidden huh… Oh sure, let's just kill our child because magic’s illegal, and that's the only way we could save her. You have a freaking magic door in the middle of the courtyard…’
“Siya.”
I jumped, suddenly becoming straight as a pencil, my annoyance draining from my face as he said my name, glaring at me.
“R-right behind you…” ‘I hope he isn’t reading my mind somehow…’
He nodded, starting down the path. “Your mother was born here, and so she never brought herself to use magic, but I was born far south from here. Where I grew up, everyone learned it, it was hard to imagine living without it.”
He snapped his finger and a bright orb glowed, floating out in front of us to guide the path.
“But… You had to give it up in order to come here, to be a noble…” ‘At least… That's what I thought…’
“Remember what I told you about doing things that are against the rules?”
“Don't get caught…” ‘Realy now, what kind of things are you teaching an impressionable young girl.’ I just let out a sigh, seemingly getting more disappointed in him every time we spoke.
While Agis wouldn’t even consider bending the truth to tease someone, it felt like he was lying to the world right to their face, and to me especially.
“Although it’s technically illegal, I was given special permission to use magic as a means of accessing this place to keep watch over it, so it’s not as wrong as it may seem in this case.”
‘Sure, whatever you have to tell yourself…’