I stood just feet away from the cliff face, overlooking the vast world I had been swept away to 14 years ago. The boy named Agis stood next to me admiring the same view, although likely for different reasons.
“Your powers are awakening.” His wispy voice carried through the wind like magic, resonating all around me.
It almost sounded like he was making a joke. “Ha, can you give them a cup of coffee or something?”
“It wasn't a joke. Although, I'm sure you'll understand what I mean soon enough.”
He walked directly in front of me, turning around to gaze straight into my eyes. He was standing on the cliff edge using only his toes without so much as a second thought. “You need to decide whether or not you want to live, because if the answer is no, your current condition will kill you.”
I froze. He was so close to me that I wanted to take a step back, but somehow I felt like even that subtle movement could make him fall. “But… My father used magic, I should be healed.”
“You have a sickness called the reaping. It plagues your mind, and can't be cured with magic. Actually, it's characterized by your body lacking energy, both magical and physical.”
‘Guess the wounds were worse than I thought, is it possible he healed me too late?’ “And the cure?” I asked.
“It's actually rather simple. All you need is a will to live that is stronger than that of sickness. Magick is powered by your own mind, so if your will to live is strong, then your body will naturally recover enough magical energy that you will be fine.”
“So all I need to do is want to live?”
“Do you not?”
His eyes pierced straight through me, his gaze wide and unrelenting. “It's not that I want to die… It's more like… Both seem pretty meaningless. I looked out over the horizon. “I mean, even the people that would mourn me wouldn't be sad for too long, and soon their lives would all be better for it.”
“Of course, if I lived I wouldn't be against that either. I might not like my life, but I never actually tried to kill myself either, even if I joked about it.”
Looking back at him, vivid memories flashed through my mind. I could see his face, and with it came old words from a lifetime ago. ‘Will you help me? The unfortunate soul who has been through so much, Rise up and take the banner of command.’
I looked up at him, my face relaxing and my eyes widening. With how close he was, at first, I wanted to step back, but suddenly it felt like we were old friends.
‘He was the one that gave me a second life. He wanted me to help him… He told me I was the only one that could.’
“Ah, so you do remember.” Without even a word he somehow knew exactly what I was thinking. “Yes, we have met before.” he continued. “I called you my secret weapon, my beautiful Golden bear. You were more mischievous back then, although I suppose you've been through a lot. It would be unreasonable of me to expect you not to change. I asked you a question, do you remember?”
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“You asked if I would help you…” I looked down.
“Ah, so you do remember. I asked you to help me, to take on the world and change it. To bring a wake-up call to all my Idiot children who think being strong is the only thing that matters. You're the only one that can do it. The great strategist from another world. What plan will you come up with to survive I wonder.”
“You want me to change this world… So, do you think that's a good enough reason to keep going? Will that give me the will to live that I need?”
He sighed, all the excitement vanishing from his voice as if he had grown tired from the conversation. “You tell me…” He said, his face softening as his calm voice reached out to me. “Ultimately it's up to you. You can try and change the world, or even leave it as is and set off on your own, trying to find what it is you're longing for. In the end, it's all up to you.
“You may be the eldest daughter of your house, but you're the third child, it's unlikely you will be forced into doing anything after you come of age. You could even give adventuring a shot if you so desired. It's not like you don't know all of this already though, you're smart enough I'm sure you figured that all out on your own.”
I couldn't help but smile, looking back up at him, and taking his comment as a compliment. When he saw it he shook his head. “You know you're smart, does it really make you that happy to hear someone else say it?”
I blushed, turning away and stepping back. “It's not that… It's just…” I paused. In reality that was exactly what it was. I haven't received a single good job from anyone for as long as I can remember. Even after slaying a monster, all I got was called stupid, so hearing someone say something good about me, however small, really did make me happy. “Well… Maybe it is…”
The gazebo faded away, slowly vanishing like ashes in the wind. 2 stone gateways appeared at the end of a bright marble staircase that led out over the cliff's edge behind him and he stepped to the side. “I'm glad.” He said, lifting an arm to the staircase. “It seems the time has come once again for you to make a choice. I don't think this one will be as easy as the last.”
Through one gate, I could see my family, my limp body lying in bed all alone. Through the other, I could see myself from my previous life. I was standing next to my parents and my sister. We were all smiling in front of a huge mansion. It brought a tear to my eyes. I had forgotten their faces, and to be able to see them again was something I could have never imagined. “This… This is a trick right?”
“No I assure you it's real, just as you were reborn, they could be as well. However, I would have to wait for a while due to logistical reasons. Eventually, I could have all of you be reborn into this world with wealthy families. You could live happily with strong, healthy bodies.”
My eyes widened, it seemed too good to be true. “For real, You can do that?”
I could see his eyes sink at the sound of my excitement. “Of course... If that's what you want,” he said slowly.
I looked back at both the doors. I have no reason to choose a life of pain over a life of joy. If I do, I could hardly call myself a strategist anymore, it makes no logical sense whatsoever. But yet… “If I go through here… what happens to Siya?”
“With your soul having left, she would die, and your family would be safe from the dangers of having let you live. There would be no catalyst for change in the kingdom, and eventually, they would be annexed by the empire and the confederation. Having refused to kneel, my people would all be executed sooner or later.”
As I looked at his soft face my heart ached. “Why are you giving me this choice when you want me to take the worse of the two options.”
He shrugged. “You've suffered enough because of me. Honestly, I never imagined it would be as hard as it is for you there. You gave it all you had, and you had a good run. If you so choose I will reward you, even if you didn't technically complete your task, you still did something amazing. But also, if your will to continue living isn't at least strong enough to make this decision, then Siya will die anyway.”
I turned around staring at the gate, lifting my hand up to it. I could see my sister from my past life walk up to me, raising her hand up on the other side. “It's unfair… Saying that I have to let a whole nation burn to get what I want… But if that nation burned, wouldn't it be for the better anyway?”
His eyebrow furrowed as he thought of the possibility. “It's your choice.”
He put so much trust in me as his chosen champion. He was putting the lives of every citizen in his country in my hands… It was an impossible decision. Either way, I was losing.
Even in the video games I played, I valued people's lives, although it wasn't altruistic. It was basic logic, the more numbers you have the better, and the more casualties you cause the more hatred grows against you.
This felt different though. These were real people. Could I make that sacrifice for my own happiness? I wasn't sure. He was so certain of the outcome, but it was possible it wouldn't even turn out the way he thought, even if I did go back there was no guarantee I could actually change anything.
I looked back at the other gate. I was sitting alone in the rain, leaning against a wooden sword that was stuck in the ground and over twice my size. My body was beaten and covered in bandages. A cloud opened up and a ray of light and warmth shined through, but the rain never stopped. It was a life of pain and loneliness. How could I choose that?