Our teacher was… An interesting guy… “Kaelium Aberairum.” A tongue twister of a name. He had spiky white hair that faded to dark blue at the ends. He was also fair-skinned, and objectively pretty good-looking. All that said, he hadn’t been teaching for long, and was only still a teenager, despite his more mature appearance. He was skilled with both greatswords and bows, which was expected, but also quite the avid spear wielder and… Dancer, of all things. Truly a man of many talents, and that was something I respected… Who he was as a person aside though, I didn’t particularly care for him as a teacher…
“When the enemy surrounds a castle and lays siege the only practical options are to sortie, leave the castle, and charge head-on into battle. The longer you wait more disadvantages start to pile up as they cut off your supply lines.”
‘He’s talented, young handsome… But not a tactician… Like really… What’s the point of having a castle if you're just going to leave and fight in the field anyway…’
I looked down at the doodles I was drawing in my notebook of me with a lizard tail and horns breathing fire. I wasn’t really trying… But it was scarily good. ‘Having dragons blood doesn’t make me better at art too does it?’ I leaned forard on my desk, holding up my head with one of my hands. ‘Maybe having a tail wouldn’t be that bad. It might be cute. I’d probably stop wearing pants though, how would I use the toilet?’
“Siya!” He shouted.
It didn’t startle me as much as slowly take me out of my thoughts. “Yeah, what is it?” ‘you know, it occurs to me that I never gave him permission to shorten my name. Well, whatever, I prefer it this way. I’ll shorten his too.’ “Is something wrong Kal?”
His eyebrows started to twitch as he tried his best to lower his voice.
‘Oh… I guess I passed him off again…’
“If you’re not going to pay attention, then why did you bother coming to class…”
I looked up at him, pausing nervously to think about it. ‘I can’t say it’s because I want my guild to know everything wrong with his lessons, can I? No… He’d just get even more mad… Then I’d get yelled at again.’ I felt my shoulders slump slightly forward. ‘I don’t really want to lie over something as stupid as this though… Wait…’ “I am paying attention though… You’re talking about how to defend against sieges right?”
I saw the hair on his arms stand up as he suddenly took a step back giving me space. “That’s right…” Without me having to say anything else he cleared his throat and continued the lecture without further questions… To be honest I wasn’t paying attention, but it was nice I was able to fake it enough to get him off my back.
‘What’s his deal anyway? He doesn’t seem like a bad guy, and it’s not like he’s bullying me…’
Isy leaned in close to me. “You don’t suppose… That he likes you…”
I just waved her off as a kid making things up. “No way. Even if we were closer in age I’m tiny, I hardly exude prime genetics.”
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“Right… It’s not like you won a bodybuilding contest and led the strongest guild in the school… You’re pretty puny. You do know that most young professors end up getting engaged to one of their students, it’s pretty normal. Then you get married on graduation. That’s one of the reasons to teach after graduation instead of joining the military.”
I felt like something inside me cracked, suddenly realizing I actually had no idea what did and did not make sense in that regard… Suddenly feeling culture shock hit me like a train. My brain quickly flipped through reasons to hate it… But the reality was that there were no grades… and the person in charge of the practical exams would be someone else… So… As much as it pained me, and scared me to say… There weren’t really all that many problems with it… At least, not compared to how medieval Europe worked… Then again… Who was I kidding… I already hated everything else anyway. “Why would you say he likes me anyway? There’s no way right?” I asked, suddenly feeling anxious. “He yells at me all the time.” ‘Then again it’s not like I have any experience with boys, and less so in this culture… I really hope I won’t have to deal with this…’
“And turns red when you get too close.” She chuckled, covering her mouth, and giving me chills. “Plus his family is from a southern region like yours, and he was very talented going through the academy as well. He even beat your eldest brother in a few duels, or so I hear.”
“He’s… From the same region?” I slowly swallowed. ‘And if he’s famous… If his family tried to arrange a marriage between us… Keigan wouldn’t accept in exchange for money to bail him out of debt would he?’ I felt my face sink. ‘No… He’d probably accept even without the bribe… Saying something like it’s for my own good... someone strong to take the burden off my shoulders… I hate my life.’ “I don’t want to marry him…”
“Why not?”
“I feel sick…”
“Siya!” He said again, catching us talking. “Come and see me after class.”
‘Just me? She was… But why just me? Like… Alone?’ I glanced over at Isy who was suddenly pretending like she didn’t know me. ‘Her past trauma must not have been as bad as I thought if she’s this cheeky…’ I sighed. ‘I definitely don’t want to marry someone like him… He yells too much…’ “Men who raise their voice when they would be heard anyway are the worst…”
“Oh? Please then, by all means, enlighten us lady Siyasavide. What kind of man do you like then?” He said bluntly, leaning against his lectern and drawing everyone's attention squarely onto me, waiting for a response as my blood ran cold. ‘I-I… Said that out loud?’ I thought for sure he would continue on if I waited long enough… But no… after a long pause we were all still just sitting there in silence. “We’re waiting…”
‘Does he really want an answer? Wait… Does that mean he actually wants to know? But…’ I covered my face, leaning forward on my desk, trying to think, stopping time before my heart exploded out of my chest. ‘Ok… Just breath… I don’t have to make this personal, I can just give a vague statement about what it means to be a man, something cheesy like strong hands and a gentle heart… Yeah, that sounds good. I can’t believe I stopped time for such a stupid reason…’
I unpaused and took a deep breath, uncovering my face. “A man should speak softly so that his actions carry more weight, and his words should be calm so that everyone knows how confident he is. He should have hands like stone and a heart that is warm and soft. When he is in pain a real man doesn’t let it show, even when it’s obvious. When someone is crying he gives them his shoulder, and when someone needs help he helps them. That’s what a man should be.” I finished speaking and everyone was still staring. ‘That’s a lot more than what I was trying to say… Do I even agree with all that? Or was I just trying to keep talking…’ I slowly covered my face again. “O-or at least… That’s what I think anyway…”
“How many in the class agree?”
‘He’s calling it to a vote? I thought we were talking about castles…’
I slowly peeked out from my fingers to see all of the girls in class raising their hands… Although, for some reason, Bear was the only guy with his hand in the air. ‘So loyal… I should buy him a cookie… Dose he like cookies? Who doesn’t.’
“Ok then… And what do you men say a man should be.” He pointed to one of them that disagreed.
The young man stood up, his voice as boyish and haughty as his looks. “It’s simple really. A man should win. The only thing that matters is whether or not you win, and so if you can’t win, it doesn’t matter how you talk or how tough you are. If you don’t win you’re just a loser, not a man.”
‘People like him are what’s wrong with this country…’ “I want to fight him…” I grumbled under my breath.
“What? But why? Are you really going to challenge him to a duel?” Isy asked, almost shocked.
All I could do was sigh. “No…” ‘Although… It would feel like poetic justice to beat him and make him lose after he opposed me under the ground that winning was all that mattered… Now I really want to fight him… I feel like I’m turning into a barbarian… I’d hate to see how I start thinking if actually start settling things with violence…’