Mara handed me a small glass filled with a thick amber fluid that was mixed with a fine grainy nut. “Drink this,” She said again, Her voice carrying the same emotionless tone I had come to expect.
I flinched. ‘This must be what she forced me to drink earlier…’ The pain from swallowing was still fresh in my mind. At that moment I had thought it was just a way to make me suffer. “But this is like… Eating tiny razor blades…”
“Don't worry, I crushed the nuts into a fine powder, they shouldn't hurt that much to swallow now. Even if it does, you still have to drink it.”
I looked down at it, the grainy powder swirling around in the fluid, barely visible. ‘Maybe I should but my throat still hurts just breathing.
I looked back to Mara, who had already turned away, doing something on my dresser. “D-do I really have too?” Her words made sense, but logic didn't always win over emotion and trauma. My body still remembered the pain, and it was causing me to shake.
I was looking right at her, but a part of me was afraid of her turning around. Chills went through my body as she began rotating her head, staring at me with a cold glare. I tried to hide my trembling, but it was no use.
She turned away again, letting out a sigh. “You don't have to, but it will make the remaining traces of the poison go away a lot faster.”
‘She's not making me?...’ That thought somehow filled me with relief, even though I knew I would end up doing it anyway. No matter how bad the training was, it wasn't nearly as terrifying as what I had experienced from the poison. That alone was enough to make me want to purge it from my body.
I took a sip. It hurt, feeling like every sip was slicing my throat, with a slight sting. ‘I don't have to… but it's manageable. If this will really help me, then I'll do it. Down the hatch.’
Its thickness made it hard to swallow, and its bitterness even more so. It was the exact opposite of the warm milk I had drank the day before.
Every gulp felt just as hard to handle as the last. I found myself struggling not to gag as the overwhelming bitterness and strong sour scent assaulted my senses.
By the time I finished, I could feel its effect already working, further reducing the swelling and soreness in my body.
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“Done…” I muttered shivering as I tried not to gag from how bitter and painful it was.
She let out a grunt in response, focusing on whatever it was that she was doing. As I began to feel better, my curiosity only grew.
“Mara?... What are you doing?” I finally asked.
She grunted again. “I'm trying to finish this…”
I turned away, looking out the window. ‘Ah yes, very descriptive… You have such a way with words Mara’ I said to myself, I wouldn't dare say it out loud, no after what just happened.
Taking the hint instead, I decided to just wait for her to finish it. I was starting to get hungry though, likely having missed several meals again.
My stomach didn't hurt from the poison, but it was certainly empty, so much so that even the bird outside my window looked good.
“Here.” I heard her grunt from behind me. As I turned I saw her doing the same, our eyes locking. She never allowed her face to relax from the clear anger it was showing, but I saw a bit of uncertainty in her eye as well. “Take this,” She said, holding out a small leather pouch with a string wrapped around it.
“What is–”
She leaned forward, getting so close that I could smell the faint scent of flowers coming from her hair. It made me freeze again, petrifying me. I felt her slowly lift the pouch over my head and move my hair for me, putting it on like a necklace.
The sudden touch of her body pressing against mine as she looked over my shoulder to make sure she had adjusted my hair properly sent a chill down my spine, but as she leaned away I was frozen again by the sudden lack of warmth.
The pouch wasn't heavy, but it was still a noticeable weight added to my shoulders. I picked it up in my hands. “W-what is it?” I finally asked again, rubbing my arms to try and get rid of the icy chill I was feeling.
It was long enough I could tuck it into my shirt, and small enough that it wouldn't be too noticeable. Unfortunately, it did still stick out. My chest wasn't that big, so it wasn't exactly easy for me to hide things like that, no matter how small they were…
She let out a small groan, noticing it sticking out from under my clothes “It's an antidote.” She grumbled. “If you ever end up like that again, take it and you'll be fine. It doesn't matter what the poison is.”
I covered my chest with my arms, somehow feeling offended by the way she was looking at me. I let out a groan of my own and she looked away.
‘Why would she give me this after poisoning me, does this mean I failed the test? Unless…’ I looked back up at her. “If it wasn't you… Then who poisoned me?”
“Some things you're better off not knowing…”
“So then… When I got the reaping, you wouldn't tell me why my manna was drained. That is one of those things as well…”
“Yes.” She said bluntly, not even taking a moment to think it through.
That answer wasn't nearly satisfying, but if it was her who was avoiding the question, I knew full well she wasn't going to spill.
Then again, I didn't know what to think anymore. I had always thought she was the type to make their intentions as clear as day, but somehow I ended up thinking she was trying to murder me when she was giving me an antidote.
For a moment I went over the memory I had from when I was an infant, second guessing if that could have somehow been the same, but I quickly realized that was just naive thinking. I had the scar to prove it
There was only one thing I knew for certain. ‘It really wasn't her then…’ If it was, she would have said so. That I was still confident in. It left me with a melancholy feeling. If it was her things would have been easy for me to handle, at least mentally.
In the end, I was only left with more questions than answers. ‘I've been in the dark for so long… And now this… I need to find some answers, one way or another.’