"Hold the shell phone," Elise said with her jaw dropping. "Archibell, you dated this wicked woman?"

Archibell clenched his fists at his side and looked up to the starlight that reflected through Sugar's cabin. "I had just returned from my voyage to hell where I had abandoned my crew and Lyra. I admittedly wasn't in the right state of mind."

"So dats where you went cap'm when you left me at a garage sale?" Tony rasped through tears. "Da Garage Sail is one o' tha biggest junk boats out there."

"I'm not proud of my choices," the captain said with his head bowed low. "Either that one...or her. I was still grieving after having laid my whole crew as a present at the devil's door."

Archibell spread his hands wide. "There was a time I wanted to watch the whole sea burn, which is quite hard to do since it's made out of water. And I needed a comrade in love to help me accomplish such a deed."

Sugar Southerncross twirled her revolver in her hands. "So this is all I was to y'all, Archie? A squishy, stressy sea cucumber since you let your first love die?"

Archibell was silent as she flicked the spinning compartment around, searching for a stray bullet to bury in his forehead. A wrong answer would clearly not suffice for the Sea Cowgirl.

"In a way," he remarked with his hand to his chin. "Yes…"

Sugar's nostrils flared like a furious mare who had just been kicked. She grinned a mad grin and clicked her gun.

Bobby covered his eyes, but Jimmy drooled, seemingly wishing he was on the end of her ire.

"But somehow…" Archibell said, almost carelessly stepping out in front of the gun. "I've returned! All that soul searching and I'm right beneath your boots n' spurs."

Elise and the rest of her crew all looked at each other filled with trepidation. Had Archie snapped?

A few seconds elapsed before Sugar gave a round of mare like whinnies for a laugh. ("A gaggle of sea horses don't sound as awful," Tony remarked) And placed her revolver in her holster.

"You're too late, Archie dear," Sugar said as she strolled over to an oversized chest in her lair. "Because I have a far greater treasure than your admiration."

She popped open the chest, and lodged inside was an enormous Hellohain man in a coral print shirt. His mouth was stuffed with what looked like the strap of a boot. Tito and Elise immediately exclaimed.

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"The Great Kolama!"

"Uncle!"

Jimmy wiggled his butt excitedly. "Aw how I wish I was him. How I'd treasure that moment!"

"This man," Sugar remarked. "This sweet dear, like a friendly sea cow in coral shirt came directly to me and offered to tell me the location of a piece of the Trident of Triumph! Said by the Sea King to grant a wish to anyone who restores it."

The Great Kolama's eyes bulged and he whimpered terrified over the woman towering over him.

"Why would my uncle do such a thing?!" Tito asked, holding his hands to his face in disbelief.

"More importantly," Archibell demanded. "Why would you want such a wish granting artifact?!"

"Perhaps," Sincirce said, giggling. "She wants to find a way to look better than me."

Another round of whinnies came from the Sea Cowgirl. "I ain't that fickle, witch. At this point in my life, looks are the only luxury I own...in addition to countless treasures of the deep."

"So then," Archibell demanded. "What is it?! What do you want."

The Sea Cowgirl did a twirl and placed her hand on the head of Tito's uncle. "I plan on restoring ma daddy's empire to its former glory!"

"What kind of empire?!" Elise demanded.

"Why his empire of sugar, sugar!" the belle exclaimed. "Yes ma daddy used to grow the finest sugarcane in the sea and this here factory used ta process it. Y'all see this wasn't merely a forbidden fortress, it's more a forbidden factory!"

Elise nodded in agreement. That made so much more sense why it looked like a derelict factory.

"Kane's Sugar was the brand that was shipped all that way across the high seas. Used in every baked good!"

Sugar cast her hand fondly towards the factory. "My daddy Colonel Kane Southerncross was a household name when I was a wee youngin. But he passed tragically."

"How so?" Elise asked.

Sugar Southerncross pulled hand back to her chest. "He fell onto a vat of molten sugar. The sweetest and most ironic death of all."

The belle paced the floor in circles with madness in her eyes. "Without his guidance, our company fell on hard times. And it lead a girl like me to a lifestyle of lootin' and shootin'. While our company plummeted, I rose in the ranks as a mighty Pirate Lord."

Sugar stopped and with it, the jingling of her boots and spurs too. "But I never forgot where I came from. Deep down, I'm just a simple lassie from the Southern Sea who wants to make my papa proud. And now I can when I wish for a return to our former glory."

The Lyre's crew all exchanged uneasy looks. Sugar Southerncross gloated with a series of whinny laughs. "And now that I have this big ijit who knows the its location, nothing can stop me!"

Tito's uncle gave a loud "mmmph mmph" to protest. He rocked the chest back and forth until Sugar Southerncross was given no choice but to remove the bootstrap from his mouth.

"I've got bad news for you, sea lily!" he said in his Hellohain accented voice. "You're never gonna find the location of the treasure."

"Why?" Sugar demanded, harshly raising her penciled eyebrows.

"Because…" the great Kolama said sniffling. "I only said it to impress you. I really don't know the location of a treasure so great. I only did it to meet the famed Cowgirl of the Sea."

Sugar was silent. Her lip trembled and she did not speak. She merely raised her pistol directly at his head. "For leadin' this gal on and dashin' her wildest fantasies to pieces, I will...end y'all life right now!"