The silence permeated around us for a moment before I heard the sound of a single set of hands clapping. I looked up from Andrian’s chest and saw an elderly woman with lively eyes watching us. Before she could speak, the orchestra began another song and she gestured towards the seating area beyond the dance floor. I glanced at Andrian, who seemed to have no objections, before nodding and following her to a set of chairs in the corner near the door to the balcony. The music was quieter there and I sat down across from her, next to Andrian.
By her presence here, she had to be a noble, and judging by her immaculate dress, she was likely a prominent one too. She was dressed in the popular Vraynian style and wore it better than some of the younger women I’d seen standing about. On her head she wore a black wide brimmed hat with a feather that looked like it was made of crystal, but moved in the breeze as if it were real.
“Allow me to introduce myself,” she said without any preamble, “I am Carlotta de Shelfort, former Duchess of Shelfort, forced to retire because of some silliness regarding a deceased husband. I’m certain you recognize my name, General Andrian?”
“Ay, I do,” he responded, “It’s a genuine pleasure Lady Carlotta.” Andrian’s enthusiastic response caught my attention. He seemed genuinely pleased with this encounter. “Allow me to introduce my partner and fiancee, Julien de Ramport.”
“Julien, ah yes, may I call you Julien?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. I gave her a single nod and a small smile. “Julien, my dear, I must tell you that it warmed my old heart to see the two of you out there. One day soon, I hope we might have a chance to talk freely together, but I’m afraid tonight shall not be that time. Far too many nosy, good for nothings hanging about the banquets these days.” She sniffed disapprovingly as she looked around the room. I found myself instantly liking her. “Anyway, I wanted to extend an invitation to the two of you to visit the Shelfort manor when you pass through the duchy.”
My eyebrows shot up. I hadn’t expected such an invitation from someone like her. I looked to Andrian and he gave me an encouraging nod, so I bowed slightly as a gesture of respect before nodding my head to agree.
“Excellent,” she said, “I can’t stand being here for even a movement longer than I have to, so I will be back at the manor within a couple of days. I imagine you boys will have your departure delayed a day or so, not to mention you’ll be traveling with an army, so I will expect your arrival in one week’s time. Oh, and feel free to bring along those other generals and your soldiers too. I have more than enough room in my barracks, though my soldiers might drive your boys insane wanting to try their strength against them.”
“I’ll keep that in mind, Lady Carlotta,” Andrian answered her with a grin. “And I’m certain some of the soldiers would be happy to comply. They’re going to be a little stir crazy from having to sit and wait outside the city.”
“Oh, General Andrian, if I may ask, did you happen to find what you were looking for?” she asked meaningfully as she glanced between us. “If I remember correctly, you were a last minute addition. One that came with his own purposes, I believe?” Her eyes sparkled as she asked him that in a knowing tone.
“Haha I have no idea what you’re talking about, my Lady,” Andrian answered teasingly, “My only purpose was peace. But, if I have to say, I’d tell you that I found what I was looking for.” He placed his hand on my knee and gave it a gentle squeeze.
I startled a bit when he said that. I thought people weren’t supposed to know about our history… Is it okay for him to say that? I guess since she already seemed to know something about it, it's probably fine.
She looked amused by my concerned expression and only said, “I’ll explain more when you come to visit, dear. Now I’m afraid I must be off. All these sycophants and war mongers aren’t good for my health.” With that, she patted my hand and stood up, continuing off into the crowd. As I watched her retreat, I was filled with an unusual warmth from her motherly gesture.
“Come, let’s go back to the table,” Andrian said and held his arm out to me. “I think we gave them more of a show than we intended. I think that should be enough for one night, don’t you?”
In complete agreement, I took his arm and let him lead me back to our table.
The rest of the night passed mostly uneventfully. Our table, with two members of the Royal family and a contingent of beastmen, was the center of attention that night. Many were too afraid to approach, but a small collection were quite brazen and directly sat down at the table like they’d been invited.
The firsts to approach us was an older couple, the Duke and Duchess of Lindenfort and my maternal grandparents through marriage. This was the Duke who had accused the First Prince of trying to sell my sister. Outside of the southern Lords and the Second Prince, they were likely the only members of the nobility who knew of my existence before the banquet. When I saw them approach and sit down, I inwardly groaned at the sight.
As expected, they showed utter disdain for the beastmen and made minimal efforts at civility toward them. However, they got along well with the Second Prince and they graciously thanked the First Prince for sparing their precious granddaughter from such an undesirable fate. When they turned to me and contemptuously thanked me for ‘sacrificing myself so enthusiastically,’ I couldn’t hold back a sneer. I was relieved when they left and impressed that the beastmen all managed to restrain themselves from saying something we’d all regret.
The second to approach us was a hard looking man of middle years. He had an enormous bushy mustache and a gruff temperament to him. He introduced himself to us as Heinrich de Misenport, Marquis of the northern duchy. Other than offering me a brief greeting, he didn’t acknowledge my presence, but I didn’t mind because he was there to talk business that I would have no part in.
The current Duke and Duchess of Misenport were on the fence regarding peace, but their son, Marquis Heinrich, was very interested in the possibilities. He had come to talk with the beastmen on matters of trade and security, a conversation that lasted for over a movement and was almost entirely over my head. From what I understood, he was interested in trading with the northern bear tribes for furs, arms, and food stuffs, and cooperation in dealing with the monsters from the wildland. It seemed a small section of the wildland bordered the north of Vrayna, past where the borderland stopped at the base of a mountain range that was nearly impossible to pass. Trolls ruled the entire mountain range that spanned across both Vrayna and the Beastlands, and troll raiding parties were a common occurrence for the northeastern region.
Shidah was receptive to the future Duke, having heard the same stories from the villages in the northwest of the Beastlands. From what he said, reinforcements from neighboring villages were often sent there before the needs of the war demanded they stay in the south. Everything north of the mountain range was wildland, and other than trolls, there was also the occasional frost zombie or ice wolf that would make its way down from the far northern regions. It seemed to be a common problem for both human and beastman alike. Marquis Heinrich had spent most of the last five years on the north eastern front, fighting monsters not beastmen, and only saw this as an opportunity to receive much needed support on what he considered to be the ‘real’ front line. Shidah promised he would speak with the tribe generals of the north and pass on the offer of alliance.
I did my best to pay attention to what they were saying, but when they started talking about strategies, trade routes, and politics, I couldn’t follow the conversation anymore. There was too much I didn’t understand, but I could see this was a good sign for the two nations. War or complete separation were the only ways we’d interacted with each other before now, and it was good to see there were some willing to take a different approach. But I couldn’t forget that the current Duke had chosen to remain neutral thus far, and that the northwest was still mainly in opposition to the treaty. The Marquis wouldn’t become Duke for many years. For now, his role was more akin to that of the beast generals, and he was an anomaly for the north, not an example.
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After the Marquis departed, the only other visitors we had were various silver haired beauties, looking to coax the Princes out to dance with them. They were shameless in their approach, some outright offering themselves to one or both of the Princes. I understood that their silver hair indicated they were of Royal blood to some degree, a requirement for marrying either of the Princes, according to the Royal family’s laws. The Royals were known for being very free in their extramarital relationships, creating many second and third cousins with only a hint of the direct Royal blood left in them, but it mattered naught as long as the hair was silver. Only silver hair with silver hair could potentially produce the golden eyed child. The First Prince looked miserable as he sent back woman after woman, each one becoming increasingly drunker and bolder as the night progressed. I guessed I could understand what he must be feeling, given that Amelie’s hair was a rich and lustrous black.
Over the course of the night I sampled a few different wines, and after the banquet had continued on for many movements, my head was swimming and I started feeling groggy. As my consciousness began drifting away from me, I was aware of two things. The first was, where I’d seen the southern lords in the crowd, not one single person had come to represent the southern Duke’s household, despite the other ducal homes sending multiple members of the house. I guess my father never expected this banquet to actually happen… He’ll be so disappointed when he finds out I’m not dead.
The second thing I noticed, right before I completely dozed off, was that I was scooped up and placed on someone’s lap to sleep. It was warm and comfortable, and it smelled nice. So in the midst of the noisy banquet hall filled with loud and rowdy nobles fueled by alcohol, I fell asleep peacefully in Andrian’s arms.
I awoke sometime later to the swaying movements of someone carrying me like a Princess while climbing up a flight of stairs. I looked around in a daze and realized I was in a part of the Palace I hadn’t seen yet. As we came out of the long spiral staircase, I looked up at the man carrying me.
“You’re awake?” he inquired softly. I nodded, the haze of sleep leaving my vision. My head felt clear and I wondered how long I’d been asleep.
“I didn’t think you’d like going back to the room that asshole Prince set you up in,” he said in an alarmingly flippant tone. I stiffened, shocked by his words, and quickly took a look around. Speaking ill of the Royal family was a crime, especially within the Palace. He laughed gently and continued, “We’re alone here. We’ve almost arrived at my room. I hope you don’t mind that I brought you here…”
He looked a little nervous, as if expecting a rejection. Yes, it’s okay, I wished I could say, I feel safest when I’m with you. There’s nowhere else I’d want to be taken. I quickly nodded my head and smiled up at him lazily from my place in his arms. As he looked down at me, his cheeks flushed a shade of crimson and he shifted his gaze forward, focusing intently on the hallway in front of him.
He stopped at a doorway and hurried to press down the knob with his foot and push the door open. He knocked it closed behind him with his foot, shifted me so he could hold me one armed for a moment as he reached back to lock it. When he released one of his arms, I instinctually clung to his neck out of fear I might fall. With my cheek pressed against his neck, I could feel his hot skin and racing pulse. My heart sped up and I suddenly felt nervous, as if realizing I might have put myself into a dangerous situation.
Sniffing my scent deeply, he quietly chuckled and whispered in my ear, “It’s a little late to get nervous, don’t you think? Don't worry. I won't do anything you don’t like.”
The next thing I knew I was on my back on the bed and he was above me. He held himself with both arms straight, propped up on his knees that rested on the bed on either side of me. It felt like he was pinning me down without actually touching me. I felt my breathing catch and realized I was a little scared. My heart told me I could trust Andrian not to hurt me but my mind and my sensibilities were rebelling. Sensing my shift from nervous to fearful, Andrian didn’t go any farther and just held himself above me patiently, waiting for me to calm down.
Once my breathing and heart rate were closer to normal, he reached out with one hand and stroked the side of my cheek, before slowly leaning his face towards mine. He stopped his movements right before he reached my lips, leaving our mouths mere inches apart. I could feel the heat of his breath on my skin, enticing me and reminding me of the kiss we’d shared earlier. I suddenly felt flushed all over and my heart was pounding again, but this time it wasn’t out of fear.
He closed the gap between us, and gently pressed his lips to mine. It was a long slow kiss, full of tenderness. Before it could become more than that, he pulled away from my lips, retreating a few inches, but not completely backing away. I met his gaze and saw the same look I’d seen when we were dancing. That look that said he desired me. It was a little frightening, but I was pretty sure that I liked it. I wanted him to keep looking at me like that.
It was me who initiated this time, kissing him tentatively. He responded in kind, gently returning my kiss, but it quickly became apparent that he wanted me to take the lead. Summoning my courage, I cautiously entered his mouth, lightly running my tongue across his before becoming more bold and entangling them completely.
Suddenly the hand that had been gently stroking my face was wrapped around the back of my head as he deepened the kiss. When I tried to pull back, his hand held my head tightly, keeping me from escaping, so he could plunder my mouth as he pleased. He seemed determined to taste every part of me as he used his tongue to trace my palate and my teeth, before entwining his tongue with mine once more. I gave in to the kiss, opening my mouth and allowing him full access to me.
After a long time and many gasping breaths, he lowered my head back onto the bed. He quickly unbuttoned my jacket and threw it open, taking a moment to admire the dense black shirt wrapped tightly around my torso. He gently ran his fingers across my chest, triggering goosebumps all over my body. I shuddered beneath him as his fingers found my nipple, standing erect and visible under the skin tight fabric. He rubbed his fingertip in a circle on its tip, before pinching it gently, eliciting a sharp, gasping sound from me as he did.
“Hmmm…?” he purred in my ear, “Does that feel good? Should I keep going?”
I looked up at him helplessly, too embarrassed to admit that it felt really good. I’d never been touched like this before and everything he did to me felt so good I could cry. I wanted him to keep going, to keep touching me like that. My face must have shown what I was feeling because he did indeed keep going. I lost track of time as he kissed and caressed me. Sometimes he kissed me softly, planting fluttering kisses on my lips, cheeks, and eyelids, then he kissed me so deeply that it left me gasping for air. No longer worried about keeping a distance between our bodies, he kissed down the exposed parts of my neck, sucking and biting randomly, while his breath tickled my skin. Next he licked and nibbled at my ears, at one point sticking his tongue inside, all while his hands rubbed up and down my torso and occasionally pinching and pulling at my nipples. Our lower bodies pressed against each other and whenever he played with my sensitive nubs, I found myself grinding against him, seeking a release for the electric sparks running up and down my spine.
Everything he was doing felt so good that I completely forgot to think about what might come next. I was melting under him, kissing him passionately, running my hands through his mane, responding to his touches desperately. I wanted him to touch me more, I wanted to let him make me feel good. But as his hand suddenly dropped down and softly caressed my erection though my pants, I panicked.
“Come on you little shit, get hard for me. You know you want it.”
Pushing Andrian away as hard as I could, I scurried to the far end of the bed. Curling into a ball to protect myself, I was suddenly flooded with memories of that one night I could never forget. No! No! No! I shook my head desperately, trying to expel it from my mind. Albrecht and the years he spent tormenting me forced their way into my thoughts and I started hitting myself in the side of the head, trying to force them out. Stop thinking about it. This isn’t that. I don’t want him to hate me!
I felt someone restraining my hands and pulling me close. Over and over, someone kept saying, “I’m sorry,” to me as they held me tight and rocked me back and forth. It’s not your fault! I’m the one who’s dirty! I’m the one who’s tainted! Self deprecating thoughts took over my mind and I felt myself shaking in his arms, overwhelmed by the battle going on inside of me.
“Ssshh, ssshh, it’s okay, Falyn, it’s going to be okay,” Andrien coaxed me desperately, “I’m sorry, okay? I won’t do it again. You’re safe, it’s okay…”
Slowly, as he held me, rubbed my back, and whispered assurances, the shaking stopped and I began calming down. I felt something wet on my face and realized a single tear had escaped from my eye. I touched my cheek then looked at the wetness on my hand in horror. I didn’t cry. Not once in all these years, had I shed a single tear. So why was I crying now?