There was no mistaking the way DH’s ears twitched and shivered. Even as TO told themself that they were wrong, there was no way they could read anything different from the way DH’s ears moved, and the deep, vibrant flush that covered them. Their ears screamed with want. And desire; All the things that TO had been feeling and suppressing, all things that DH was apparently feeling right now.
DH suddenly jumped up as though burned and pressed themself against the wall as far away from TO as they could get in the cramped space. Their ears stopped twitching and now simply bent down at the side of DH’s head, still vivid blue with humiliation.
“I’m sorry!” they said suddenly. They pulled themself up and hurried to the washroom, sidestepping TO’s still prone form as they went in, they kept muttering, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” as the door closed and silence filled their small living area.
TO hadn’t moved. They were still laying on the ground, more confused than anything. The events that had just passed, what they had just seen, organized itself in their mind. Want, desire, and maybe even lust; TO had definitely read that in DH’s ears. Had DH been feeling that for TO? Was it possible?
After a moment of wondering about it, TO realized that this had happened as DH had been hovering over TO’s prone, naked, and wet body. With a sudden flush, they realized that they themself had to be a complete moron if they had to question that.
TO sat up and scurried over to the door to the washroom. They wanted to open it right up, but they didn’t, not right away. They knocked.
“DH?”
DH’s voice came to them through the closed door, pitched and panicked, “I’m sorry. I’m so-”
“DH stop.” TO said, trying to keep their own voice firm. They thought of all the ways they had thought about DH, and of all the times that their own ears had moved like that when DH was running through their head. Had DH been thinking those things about TO?
It was likely. Probable even. TO’s heart felt like it was going to burst out of their chest, They felt dizzy, and there was an odd surreal feeling to everything. They wondered if maybe the fumes they had inhaled had affected their mind. They wondered if they had hit their head too hard when they fell over, and maybe now all this was just happening in their mind.
The heat in their ears felt real. The swelling in their chest, the pressure that was suddenly creeping into their body
“... I’m sorry.” DH said again, their voice softer this time.
“You have nothing to be sorry for!” TO said. There was no answer. “Alright.. I’m coming in.”
“Dont’!”
“Then you come out!” TO insisted, “You promised! We both promised not to run away anymore-”
“I- I’m not running!” DH said. Their voice was strained, and there was a slight crack to it. “I’m not... I… I just need a minute. Let me... Just give me a minute.”
“And then you’ll come out?”
“I’ll come out, and you can say whatever you want to say to me then.”
“You’ll come out and -” They recalled Avery’s constant recommendation that they just talk to DH. They recalled GiDi telling them they needed to talk. “-and we’ll talk. Ok?”
“... Alright.”
TO took a deep breath and turned to the closet. They were still wet, so they grabbed a towel and started drying off. As their mind sorted out everything that had just happened, they had an idea.
“When you come out, come up to the weapons bay.” TO said, “You have ten minutes, or I’m going to worry that you’re avoiding me. Alright?”
There was no response. TO waited a moment before they knocked on the door, “DH? Ten minutes. You’ll be up there?”
After just another moment of silence, TO heard DH say softly from the other side of the door, “Ok.”
“Promise?”
“... I Promise.”
“Good.” TO said. They dried themself off quickly, then headed to the elevator.
They’d go to the weapons bay, but first they had to go to the engine room.
======
TO was sitting on the floor of the weapons bay atop the towel they brought, their wings wrapped around them as they watched the stars and planets in the distance through the windows of the weapons bay. TO was certain that ten minutes had passed, and they were about to get up and go get DH when the elevator door opened. DH entered, looked around, and when they saw TO their ears flushed and they instantly looked away.
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TO gave as comforting of a smile as they could. They were certain that their own ears were twitching with anxiety, but still they knew that this was worse for DH. They could only imagine how they’d feel if they had been in DH’s position. Even thinking about it made panic run up their spine and made their ears flush. Still, they couldn’t help feel this was their fault. They hadn’t told DH how they felt, and now because of everything, DH looked like they wanted to disappear from existence. Even though they were nervous and worried about this, they knew that if they had just told DH how they felt beforehand, if they had taken GiDi and Avery’s advice, then this wouldn’t have happened.
Then DH wouldn’t look so humiliated and anxious.
“... Sit with me?” TO said, their voice quiet as they patted the floor next to them. DH glanced over quickly, their wings tightening around them. Finally, then they sat down next to TO.
TO still didn’t know what to say. There was a lot to say, and they didn’t know how to say any of it. “It’s nice up here.” they finally said, “When the lights are down, anyway. It reminds me of the observation deck. I only wish we had a couch here too.” They looked to DH and desperately wanted to reach out and take their hand or wrap a wing around them. “Wouldn’t that be nice?”
DH gave a brief hum, but didn’t respond right away. TO tried to think of what they could say to make this better. Well, they knew what to say… they just had to say it.
“So… You didn’t get hurt, did you? When you fell down?” DH finally asked.
TO shook their head, “I’m fine.” they said, “I… well, my head is fine. My rear might hurt for a day or so.”
“Good…” DH said, then they quickly added, “I mean, not good that your rear might hurt! I don’t want your rear to hurt. I mean... I’m just glad that you’re not seriously hurt.”
“Thank you.” TO muttered. They had to talk about what had just happened. TO didn’t want to embarrass DH more than they were, but they had to talk about it!? “Are you ok?”
“I-... Yeah, I’m fine.” DH muttered, their ears twitching with each syllable.
“You’re lying.” TO said. “DH...”
“I’m uninjured, I mean.” DH said. They pulled their knees to their chest, their wings tightening around them, “Look… Look, I’m sorry.”
“DH-”
“No. Look. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” they shook their head, and put their face in their hands, “I didn’t mean to… to do that. To react like that, I Couldn’t help it...”
“I know. We can’t really control our ears. DH, listen-”
“I know I can’t. I should be able to control… other things, though! And I’m sorry that I can’t, and I’m sorry that… that you saw me like that. I’m just really, really sorry. I didn’t want you to see me like that, I didn’t want to be like that, and-”
“Stop!” TO reached out and put a hand on DH’s shoulder. They flinched, but didn’t pull away.
“DH… it’s fine. Really, it’s ok.”
“... It’s not.” they muttered, still holding their hands to their face. “You don’t even know what... If you knew, You’d hate me.”
“How many times have we said this to one another?” TO said as they shuffled closer to DH, “I could never hate you.” They felt a twinge of guilt as they recalled all the doubts that they had before, how even though they knew DH wouldn’t hate them, how worried they were that DH might be uncomfortable around them.
It seemed like such a stupid worry now. They should have just told them. They should have told DH the moment they got on the ship.
“I just....” They shook their head. “I’m just sorry.”
“Stop apologizing.” TO said, though their voice was as gentle as they could make it, “It’s ok. I don’t hate you!” They flushed as they recalled their own worries, “I’m not angry. I’m not uncomfortable. It’s fine.”
DH slowly lowered their hands, now covering only half their face as they spoke, “I know… Look, I know you don’t.. Want.. any of that.” They stopped and groaned. “Look, I.. I’ll give you space. I’ll move the beds back apart. Maybe you wouldn’t hate me, but I just don’t want to upset you, and I can’t help this! I’ve tried. So I’ll give you space-”
“NO!” TO said as they turned towards DH, “NO, I don’t want space!”
“What do you want!” Their hands came down, and they looked at TO, horrified, confused, and anxious. “What do you want? I can’t help this, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable!”
TO pulled DH into an embrace, their wings wrapping around them. They brought their mouth close to DH’s ears, but they were very careful not to touch them. They didn’t know if DH wanted them to touch their ears, or if they did, TO didn’t know if they wanted it right now. Their words threatened to catch in their throat as they spoke.
If they had told DH earlier, this wouldn’t have happened. DH wouldn’t be so upset right now.
“... I want you to look at me like that again.” TO whispered. They thought their ears were going to burn off the side of the head. A part of them wasn’t even sure that they had said it! It felt like some other entity had said it and had just used TO’s mouth.
DH shook their head and hid their face in TO’s chest, “You don’t understand.” they muttered. “I.. I’m sorry. When I looked at you like that… I mean, it was… I wanted to.” their ears burned and twitched as they held onto TO.
“... You wanted to... kiss me?” TO asked. DH’s grip tightened on TO as though they might suddenly slip away from them.
“I’m sorry.” DH whispered.
TO swallowed several times and took a deep breath before they continued, “Because… If you did… If you wanted to kiss me, I think I’d be ok with that.”
Why did it suddenly seem so silent in the weapons room? Why did DH seem to go so suddenly still? They lifted their face from TO’s chest and looked at them in total confusion.
“What?”
“I mean... If that’s what you wanted.” TO said quickly, suddenly terrified that they had, somehow, misunderstood. “I’d be ok with that. I mean, I-” They stopped. According to Avery, they had to be blunt and straightforward. They pulled back and held DH before them so that they could clearly see DH’s ears.
“Do… do you want to kiss me?” they asked.
“... Yes.” DH said, their blue ears twitching.
“I’d like that.”
DH stared at TO in amazement as the surrounding silence grew ever more suffocating. “Well... well say something.” TO said as they looked away, “Or… Or do it. If you still want to.”
“You… You know that’s… I mean, that’s really a romantic thing-”
“I’m well aware.” TO said as their ears flattened out. They reached under the towel and took out the little gem that they had hidden up in the engine room. “I.. I had been wanting to give you this for a while. Normally these things-”
DH let their eyes linger on the heart-shaped purple gem. “It… Wait, you told me about that festival a few days ago.”
TO felt their ears flush, “Well… Well, I wanted to give this to you, and I don’t know if you’d get what it meant, so I had to… You know., I had to make sure you knew, but then you said that heart-shaped things as a sign of romantic interest was stupid so I wasn’t sure-”
“Well, it is!” DH protested, “I mean… the heart shape is! Giving gifts as a sign of romantic intention isn’t but the fact that it’s a heart… Wait… You were going to give this to me… because-”
TO remembered their plan. They remembered how they could make this exceedingly clear in so few words. They took DH’s hand and pressed the gem into their palm.
“I…” Their ears burned. They felt sick. Was this going too far?
They didn’t care.
“I want to be your mate.” TO said, “I… I have for a while.”
DH closed their fingers around the gem. They gazed at TO, their eyes wide as their ears flicked back in confusion.
“And I mean, if you don’t, that’s fine.” TO said quickly, “I’m sure-” Before TO could say anything more, DH brought their snout to the side of TO’s face. They pressed their cheek against TOs for just a moment before they shifted slightly. Their lips pressed together in a chaste, quick peck. It was quick, but that moment of contact, and what it actually meant to TO, sent shivers down their spine.
“Does that mean that you… You’re ok with that?” TO asked. “That you’d… That you’d want to be my mate?”
In response, DH put a hand on TO’s shoulder, another around the small of their back just under their wings, and they kissed them again. It lasted longer this time, and when DH pulled their lips from TO’s they rested their head against the side of TO’s neck.
“Yes.” they whispered, “More than anything.”