Bundled in blankets atop a comfortable divan, Min Gyu sipped his tea by the lit brazier, stroked sleeping Kishi’s velvety fur, and relaxed as his worries slowly melted away.
There were many reasons for his current contentment, the least of which was young Rain’s unexpected recovery. Perhaps recovery was too strong a word, as the boy still had a ways to go yet before the Medical Saint could give him a clean bill of health, but any progress was good progress. After more than two months spent in a coma and most of third living in a waking fugue wherein he was only aware of his bodily needs, Rain was finally responding to outside stimulus again. There was a time when he ate whatever was placed before him, regardless if it was a piping hot bowl of soup or simply a receptacle for discarded chess pieces, but he was no longer that same empty vessel anymore. When sweet Tali announced that the boy had recovered, Min Gyu’s first instinct was to doubt her, but one look at Rain’s face was all it took to accept the darling child’s words as truth. Though his expression was still stiff and impassive, his distant, vacant stare had disappeared, and in its place was a warm and tender averted gaze tinged with love and embarrassment.
After the initial elation, however, it became clear that the boy was not yet out of the woods. Though capable of speech, Rain’s words came out slowly and with great difficulty, and never more than a handful of words at a time which only rarely made sense. Then there was the matter of his lacking awareness and comprehension, to the point where the Medical Saint had to sometimes repeat his instructions a half-dozen times before getting through to young Rain. Even then, he was prone to lapse into distracted thought, or more prone than usual at least. Rain did so love to let his mind wander at times, but this was far worse than mere inattentiveness. Over the course of the day, they tried to have Rain read, write, and carry out a variety of tasks and puzzles testing his cognitive abilities, but alas, he failed them all in spectacular fashion.
The good thing was that the boy’s failures were not due to ineptitude, but rather a lack of focus. When directed to read a set of written instructions, the boy would merely glance at the paper for a moment before his eyes wandered elsewhere. He would much rather stroke the feathered quill or dip his finger in the ink as opposed to leave any message of any kind. The same thing would happen with verbal instructions, whether they were vocalized or Sent, as he constantly lost himself in the speaker’s eyes and studied faces with extreme fixation, making it extremely obvious when he stopped staring to contemplate their words after the fact. It wasn’t just the prettier faces that caught his attention either, though he did spend an inordinate amount of time locking eyes with his sweethearts, but his parents, grandparents, teacher, and even Min Gyu himself received almost as much consideration. The pets received even more, as they constantly interrupted with their efforts to catch Rain’s attention and more often than not succeeded, leaving him to spend many a minute staring at his animals, stroking their whiskers, and tracing their features as if seeing them all for the first time.
He tried that with the people too, but only a select few allowed it, namely the two children, Mei Lin, and the Medical Saint, as they were the only ones not embarrassed by Rain’s overly intimate actions. Li Song lacked the ability to refuse, but oddly enough, when he reached out to touch her face, his hand stopped short before making contact, only to drop away without ever losing interest. All without a visible sign from the stony-faced half-cat, Min Gyu noted, who was much harder to read than Kyung.
In then end, though Rain was clearly capable of understanding their words and instructions, he seemed wholly incapable of following through without getting distracted. As such, even though they only planned this excursion as a day trip, Zheng Luo thought it wise to keep him away from the Citadel for a few days more, if only to give her time to prepare for his return. Thus the whole family availed themselves to the manor for the remainder of the day and night, even Baatar and Akanai who no doubt had pressing matters to tend to. Min Gyu couldn’t fault them for their decision, because not only was this a joyous occasion, but it became all the more vital to protect the boy now that they knew a full recovery was within reach.
It seemed callous to even think this, but for a time, Min Gyu had wondered if the Empire would’ve been better served if they hadn’t kept Rain’s condition a secret. This would’ve meant having him step down as Legate of the Outer Provinces, but Colonel General Shuai Jiao was more than capable of keeping the alliance together, especially with support from Nian Zu and Yuzhen, support they would have undoubtedly provided at Baatar’s request. Zheng Luo had done a marvellous job putting out fires and keeping the Western Wall functional, but she was a politician first and no sort of soldier at all. If she were, she would’ve seen the grave error in withdrawing so quickly from the second line. Though her reasoning was logically sound, tactically, it was a disaster. To date, their victory along the second line marked the Empire’s most resounding victory against the Enemy in living memory, so to retreat so soon after sent the wrong message to soldiers and citizens alike, that no matter how hard they fought or how much they sacrificed, the Defiled still held the upper hand in the end.
This wasn’t all. The early withdrawal had enabled the Southern coup which was still playing out to this day, as it relieved the Southern Generals from their duties on the second line before Marshal Quyen had time to prepare. Were he given even a few days to work unhindered, Min Gyu was almost certain the formidable man would’ve tamed his unruly Generals with ease, whether it be by playing them against one another, making an example of the most outspoken, or whatever political machinations Marshal Quyen might have hidden within his sleeves. However, Zheng Luo gave the order to withdraw without consulting anyone besides Akanai, and all of a sudden, every notable Southern Officer of rank and ambition no longer had any duties to distract them and could only focus on the lofty title dangling before their very eyes: Colonel General of the South.
There was a time to be bold and decisive, but alas, the girl had chosen her timing poorly. Min Gyu was of the opinion that the Empire would have been better served holding the second line for another week before falling back, even if it cost them more lives in the short term. By choosing the safest option, Zheng Luo might well have doomed the Empire by dealing a grievous blow to their morale when it should have been at its highest. Between the fractured South, the squabbling North, and the ingrained instability of Central, this premature withdrawal left many a chink in the Imperial defences for the Enemy to exploit, but luckily, they were too busy reeling from their disastrous defeat.
Hardly surprising for Defiled to fall to infighting, but having seen the so-called Army of Chosen on the battlefield, Min Gyu should be forgiven for overlooking this possibility. Despite Rain’s constant reminders that they faced the same insidious foe as always, it was easy to forget that they were fighting Defiled upon the battlefield, as opposed to the rebel Imperials they presented themselves as. Even in official documentation, there was a clear differentiation between the Chosen and the ‘Defiled auxiliaries’, a mistake in and of itself. Better to call them ‘tribal’ or ‘foreign’ auxiliaries if necessary, but the Colonel Generals had too much on their plates to quibble over terminology, especially now that their scouts were reporting increased activity in and around the border cities, where the Enemy was amassing for yet another invasion.
But now, Rain was back, or at least on the road to recovery once again, and silly as it might seem, Min Gyu’s spirits were bolstered by the boy’s return. Falling Rain was a man of miracles, one blessed by the Mother Above, and if there were ever a time when the Empire needed a miracle, that time was now. His plans and schemes had already thrown back one invasion, so a second did not seem so far-fetched, though Min Gyu’s faith was being sorely tested as he watched Rain revel and frolic in the courtyard. Though his expression was largely frozen and his words in short supply, his behaviour spoke loudly enough to drown out all else.
Previously, letting Rain show his face in public conveyed little to no risk, as there was almost nothing in his actions or expression that might have given him away. At worst, one might think him exhausted or lost in thought, but now, all his inner thoughts were all reflected in his too-expressive eyes and unfiltered actions. It wasn’t that the boy was behaving out of character, but rather that his actions were too in character, to the point where it made others feel embarrassed for him. It was amusing at first, seeing him indulge his innermost desires without thinking, as it’d been harmless enough, with simple staring and a desire to trace someone’s features with his fingers. Eating was another obvious indulgence, as he gorged himself on dumplings, noodles, buns, and everything else young Charok and sweet Tali had prepared for them all. Unsurprising considering the boy spent two months in a coma eating nothing but fluids, and the last two weeks eating just enough to keep from withering away, not to mention the fact that sweet Tali’s dumplings were the most delicious and delectable thing Min Gyu had ever tasted. They were so delicious, he almost couldn’t stop himself from eating more and wound up disappointed when Tali didn’t cook them again for dinner, but it made sense considering how drained she appeared after lunch. She would go far in life, able to find Insight and inspiration in the Dao while doing something as mundane as cooking, and he once again marvelled at how effective the Bekhai’s way of teaching had proven to be.
After sating his hunger and failing his tests in spectacular faction, Rain moved on to fulfilling his other desires, this time focusing on the love and attention of his family. Again, nothing too untoward had taken place, as lust was further down the list of his desires than one might’ve otherwise guessed, but Rain was just so... unrestrained in his appreciation of everything that watching him almost felt voyeuristic. One moment he would be happily snuggling his bears, and the next he would get lost in Yan’s eyes. Riding his quin Zabu in tandem with Mila kept him occupied for an hour, right up until he wanted to lie down by the riverside and watch the water flow by. After that, he spent another hour lying atop Aurie and playing a simple game with Sarankho, placing his hand atop her paw, after which she would then place her paw atop his hand, only for the cycle to repeat. They kept this up until the game lost its allure for Sarankho, at which point Rain moved onto the birds, though he merely stroked their beaks and feathers while sitting across from Princess, no doubt eagerly hoping to entice the weasel-bear over. What came next was an excursion from the grove to follow the red panda Guai Guai around, accompanying him as he ambled about the fields without aim and explored every nook and cranny of the surrounding area.
Rain spent the entire afternoon captivated by something or the other, and his intense adoration was both charming and unsettling. No one was spared from being the subject of his attentions, which made for a few amusing moments, like when he wrapped Husolt’s head in a hug and refused to let go, even after the towering blacksmith stood up and lifted the boy off his feet. Rain also tried to stuff his head inside a small tunnel, one recently excavated by the resident thieving groundhog, and when his wives wouldn’t let him, he had a bit of a sulk and laid prone on his belly for almost fifteen minutes while staring at the hole for no reason in particular. Overall, most of his attention went to his wives, followed by his pets, but he also made time to snuggle up beside his parents to enjoy their company, listen admiringly to Zheng Luo and Tali’s musical performance, clap enthusiastically for Tate’s Martial Demonstration, and stare at whatever caught his attention without blinking, including the wrinkles on the back of Min Gyu’s hand. Add in the boy’s penchant for sharing his emotions through Aura, and it surprised them all to learn just how much restraint Rain normally exercised in his everyday life. The Falling Rain that rolled around in the grass giggling with his rabbits? Apparently, that was his version of restraint. After twenty minutes, even Mama Bun eventually grew annoyed by his constant cuddles and kisses, though Aurie and Tawny One didn’t seem to mind his stream of unending affection, and the bears were more than happy to accept their fair share as well.
All this was in good fun, as they were in the privacy of a family home, but less amusing were the times when Rain’s hands idly wandered around his wives’ bodies, much to everyone’s chagrin. It wasn’t anything too perverse, as his hands stayed outside of their robes, but no man wanted to see their precious daughter or granddaughter getting idly groped, even if the groper was their husband...
At the moment, the little lecher was sitting with his sister and her children, holding Tate in his lap while Charok told the young ones a bedtime story, but Rain looked most engrossed of all. It was a simple tale of heroes and beasts, but his eyes grew wide with wonder as the narrative unfolded, albeit in a delayed fashion, and Min Gyu thought he even saw signs of changing expression. Why Rain was behaving in such an... not innocent or naive, but... impressionable manner was a mystery they all pondered, and not even the Medical Saint had an answer to share. Their best guess was that either there was something wrong with his head which needed Healing, or this impassioned Rain was merely another facet of the Rain they saw last time in Sinuji. When threatened upon the battlefield, he became a hunter, a warrior, a killer of Demons because that was necessary for survival. In the same vein, perhaps this Rain, this foolish, loving, overly saccharine man-child, was needed now in order for him to recover, but why that might be was anyone’s guess.
A brisk breeze sent a chill coursing through Min Gyu’s old bones, so he drained his teacup just in time to spot Kyung coming out of the kitchen with a piping hot mug he prepared for himself. Perhaps it was because he’d been studying Rain all day, but Min Gyu noticed a look in his grandson’s emerald eyes that was similar to Rain’s, so full of zest and appreciation for a mere drink. The unexpected discovery made for a bittersweet moment, for it was heartwarming to see Kyung slowly coming out of his shell, and disheartening to know he’d been denied such simple pleasures for so much of his life. Though not the sort to indulge in liqueur, his tea no doubt contained enough honey to rot a dozen teeth overnight, which was enough to have the poor boy almost grinning from ear to ear. Well, not quite grinning, as his expression was stony and impassive as always, but his cat ears were flicking to and fro while his tail curled up behind him, sure signs of joy as any when coming from him.
All of which was shattered in an instant when he noticed Min Gyu’s attention, and Kyung’s joy and anticipation were swept away by a torrent of momentary panic.
Old habits die hard, and Min Gyu blamed himself for mistreating the boy so. Putting on a smile, he patted the divan in invitation and asked, “Care to keep an old man company?”
“Happily, Grandfather.” Kyung’s fear and concern disappeared so quickly one might almost believe it was imagined, but Min Gyu would not so easily forgive himself, especially as he watched Kyung exchange his mug for the empty teacup and pot instead. “I will return promptly after I refill your tea.”
“No need, no need, if I drink anymore, I’ll be up all night going from bed to bathroom and back again.”
“Then another blanket. The night is cold Grandfather.”
“I’ll be fine without. No need to worry about me, I am comfortable and without need. You’ve been standing all day though, so you most certainly deserve to sit and relax.” It was difficult to avoid making demands of Kyung, but allowing him the option to refuse was the least Min Gyu could do. The half-cat hesitated a moment longer before finally deigning to sit, but even then, he sat upright with his sabre laid out over his knees, ready to bolt to his feet at a moment’s notice. “No need to be so guarded,” Min Gyu said, slipping his arm around his grandson’s shoulder. “We are safe here, amongst family.” To his surprise, Kyung stiffened, then relaxed and leaned into the embrace until his flicking ears brushed against Min Gyu’s cheek. There they sat in comfortable silence as Kyung enjoyed his tea, making quiet sounds of appreciation after every sip and growing more relaxed with each passing second.
“I’d almost forgotten how quiet it can be outside of the Citadel,” Min Gyu began, stifling a sigh as he looked up at the starry night’s sky. “We should come out here more often, away from the bustling streets and political dealings of the Citadel.” Kishi certainly approved of life outside the Citadel, as the quin did so love to run and play, though she would grow lonely if separated from her parents for too long.
“If that is what Grandfather desires.” Shoulders tensing up ever so slightly, Kyung paused before adding, “If so, then perhaps you could consider taking on more students, especially if we are to travel without sister Yan. Already, we are stretched thin guarding you both as is, and now that the tales of your grand showing in the last battle have spread far and wide, there are countless Warriors clamouring for your guidance once again.”
“Bah, what grand showing? I was but a side dish, wholly unworthy of admiration.” Three months had passed since that fateful battle, and still the taverns were filled with gossip of his accomplishments, but it was a sore subject for Min Gyu because he heard little to no talk regarding the true heroes of that battle. Everyone spoke loudly of Shuai Jiao, Nian Zu, the fallen Tiger General, and more, but were it not for Akanai and Situ Jia Yang keeping the monstrous Bai Qi in check long enough for the reinforcements to arrive, the traitor general might well have dealt the Imperial Army a disastrous defeat, one which would have doomed all of Central, if not the Empire as a whole. More to the point, Jia Yang, a Warrior now famed for his defensive prowess, took severe injuries fending Bai Qi off, their exchanges rupturing several of his inner organs which almost killed him. To this day, he had yet to receive a clean bill of health and was still technically in recovery, though from the looks of things, he would be fit for duty soon enough. The unfortunate Mitsue Juichi also suffered similar internal injuries from his clash with Bai Qi, and unbeknownst to most, almost died despite receiving immediate treatment from Central’s most revered Healer, Taiyi Zhushen himself. This was the true reason for Juichi’s extended absence from the public eye, though having seen the poor man’s reaction, Min Gyu agreed with the rumours stating that Hideo’s betrayal had broken poor Juichi’s old heart.
In contrast, Akanai’s injuries were laughably light, to the point where she did not even require a Healer’s attention. While her detractors claimed she had every opportunity to have seen one in secret, Min Gyu knew she would not lie about such a thing. Nor would she boast about it either, but others did so in her place, from proud Bekhai Khishigs and admiring Imperial soldiers who’d seen her phenomenal skills firsthand. Min Gyu even tried to laud her accomplishments himself, but that only made people praise his humility or whisper how he was obligated to do so due to his relation with Rain. A disgrace is what it was, because Akanai was far more worthy of praise than Min Gyu himself, but few cared to extol her virtues in Central lest they be laughed at for admiring a half-beast woman.
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As if heritage or gender changed anything about a Warrior’s strength. Might makes right? Pei. A lie, and not even for the right reasons.
Sitting upright to face him, Kyung didn’t quite look Min Gyu in the eye as he said, “A select few might be more deserving, but Grandfather is still a Warrior worthy of respect.”
“Bah. Am I?” Replaying the exchanges between Bai Qi and Akanai in his mind’s eye, Min Gyu shook his head in quiet awe at her skill. “It pains me to admit it, but I now see my skills are sorely lacking. I am admired because of how quickly and easily I dispatch my foes within the chaos of battle, but whether it be Demon or Defiled, the hard truth of the matter is that I only excel against those weaker than myself, because I have seen and studied those weaknesses a thousand times over while teaching students and Disciples. Against a Warrior of equal or greater skill, I would be hard pressed to eke out an advantage, or even stall for time like Jia Yang was able to, though at great cost. Were I to pit myself against Bai Qi, he would strike me down in the first exchange, because there is nothing I can do against his flawless execution combined with his overwhelming speed and power. I knew this as soon as I saw him in action, which is why I let others risk their lives against him in my place and instead stuck to facing foes I knew I could defeat.”
“In the Three Hunting Strategies, The Exploitation of Opportunity states to strike where the enemy is weak and guard against them where you are strong. Grandfather is strong against the masses, and more suited to bolstering the line, whereas Akanai is an unparalleled duellist and Jia Yang’s only notable attribute is his superlative defence.” Raising his head ever so slightly, Kyung finally met Min Gyu’s gaze and added, “Each Warrior must follow their own Path. How many others would be found wanting if they were to match themselves against Grandfather’s strengths?”
Caught off-guard by the vehemence in Kyung’s voice, Min Gyu was struck speechless for long seconds before bursting into laughter, but only because Akanai Sent, “Your grandson is a remarkable student burdened by an intelligent but senile teacher. You would be best served by dying earlier so as not to ruin him in your dotage.”
As if she had any right to call him old, but Min Gyu couldn’t help but smile. It was easy to see why the woman had been chased out of Central, for she had a sharp tongue and dark humour, but damn if she hadn’t grown on him in their time together. “True,” he Sent back, puffing up with pride for his grandson, only to deflate as he considered the truth. “But I fear he has excelled in spite of my influence, rather than because of it.” Ignoring whatever Akanai’s reply might have been, Min Gyu threw up a Sound Barrier, but only to save what little face he still had left. Cupping Kyung’s cheeks with a smile, he gazed upon this fine Warrior and wondered what could have been.
But alas, there was no cure for regret.
“I am sorry,” he said, and again, Kyung stiffened in fear or panic, and Min Gyu hated himself for being the cause of it. “You were my finest student and Disciple, but I never saw you as anything more than a slave. I wronged you, denied you of a life to call your own, treated you harshly and without consideration. You only ever knew me at my worst, a crippled, drug-addled fool drunk on memories of past strength and glory, yet still you saw the best in me and went above and beyond your obligations.” Two tears spilled from his eyes, but he would allow no more, because Kyung had seen enough of his weakness. “I know you have no choice but to remain at my side, and could not leave even if you wanted, but I want you to know I truly regret how I have treated you. Though your Oaths still bind you, you are no slave, not anymore. You have nothing to fear from me, nothing at all, because you are Du Min Kyung, my finest Disciple and esteemed grandson who I love and cherish more than life itself.”
Releasing his hold of Kyung’s cheeks, Min Gyu gathered his Chi, summoned a Wind Blade, and said, “With the Heavens as my witness...” Bringing the blade down upon his left forearm, he waited for the spurt of blood before continuing his Oath, but strangely enough, it never came. Glancing at his hand and sleeve, and tried to make sense of what happened to his Wind Blade, only to start when he saw a shadow fall over him. “Oh,” he said, shaking his head as he saw Rain standing there with that same blank expression, cuddling a sleeping Mama Bun and Guai Guai close to his chest. “Hello, boy. Is something the matter?”
“Wrong.” There was a hint of disapproval in Rain’s eyes, which was the only clue Min Gyu had to go on, and it made little sense enough on its own. Then, the boy looked to Kyung and added, “Not Wrong. But Wrong.”
Exchanging a glance with Kyung, Min Gyu saw his confusion mirrored in the half-cat’s expression, so he turned back to Rain and said, “...I see.”
“...No. Wrong.”
“Sorry Grandpa.” Slipping her arm around Rain’s waist, Yan tried to gently turn Rain away, but he wouldn’t budge. “Didn’t mean to interrupt,” Yan continued, grunting as she put some muscle into it, but Rain’s reforged body refused to budge. “I’ll just get him out of the way, and you two can continue your little heart to heart.”
“Wrong,” Rain uttered, but again, no one had any idea what he was talking about, and it was clear he knew it too. This was how Min Gyu knew the boy would eventually recover, these minor signs of intelligence trapped behind an invisible barrier. Frustration mounted behind his amber eyes, but then a wave of clarity washed over them. “Hug.” Pulling Yan along as he stepped in close, Rain leaned over and touched his head to Min Gyu’s in an armless hug. Chuckling beneath her breath, Yan threw her free arm around around Min Gyu and quietly urged Kyung to join them, at which point Rain said, “Right.”
And oddly enough, Min Gyu understood. Rain was trying to say that an Oath was the wrong way to show love and affection. A hug was better, because they were freely given, which might no longer be true if compelled by an Oath, so he clung to his grandchildren a little tighter and prayed that his feelings would show through. They stayed hugging for a little longer, if only so he could dry his tears, until he finally released his hold. “Bah, enough of this. Go bathe yourself boy, you reek of bear, quin, wildcat, and worse.” Amusement flashed in Rain’s eyes as he stepped away, but then his head drooped and his eyes unfocused. Frowning as he reached out to steady the boy, Min Gyu checked his health ever so briefly and said, “It’s been a long day, so perhaps it’s time he retired to bed.”
“Well, if you insist Grandpa. Goodnight then.” The incorrigible girl even had the gall to leer as she led her husband away, joined by little Mila who at least had the decency to blush as the three of them said their good nights and retreated to the bathhouse together.
So scandalized by their behaviour, Min Gyu didn’t think to ask until the three of them were safely away. “Did anyone here block my Wind Blade?” Everyone in the courtyard merely looked around, and it was clear no one present was responsible, which meant...
Min Gyu was not the only one to turn towards the boy’s room with a smile upon his face. Somehow, Rain not only heard them through a Sound Barrier, but also blocked a Wind Blade meant to draw blood without lifting a finger. A show of Domain in the morning, and now, not even twelve hours later, he was already capable of utilizing Elemental Chi. The boy was well on the road to recovery, and Min Gyu could hardly wait to see what the future had in store.
Patting Kyung on the shoulder, Min Gyu accepted his help getting to his feet and they shuffled off together. “I’ve said it before, but if there is anything you desire, just speak and I will do what I can to help you achieve it.” Smiling at Kyung, he added, “I offer this not out of guilt, but in hopes of igniting your ambition, dear boy. You cannot keep living for an old man. You must find your own purpose in life if you are to progress, whether it be fame, fortune, family, or what have you.”
Seeing Kyung’s hesitance, Min Gyu patiently waited for him to speak for fear of compelling him, and soon enough, his efforts were rewarded. “There is a matter,” Kyung began, “But I worry it will cost too much, in time, effort, and consequence.”
“Let me worry about the costs. You only need speak your desire, and I will beg, borrow, or steal to make it happen.” Patting himself on the chest, he added, “Don’t look down on your grandfather here. Whatever it is, I can bear the cost. What? You need me to prove it before you will speak? I only need to snap my fingers and my stolen wealth will be returned to me, with interest owed to boot.” The only reason he hadn’t was because of lingering affection for his deceased siblings, but these days, Min Gyu’s living relatives were sorely testing his patience as they tried to mend broken bridges and trade on his name once more. “I could also start giving lectures again, endorse a blacksmith sabre maker, or even request the army begin paying my wages once more. I cannot recall how much pay a Lieutenant General draws, but seeing how I am now worthy of the rank, I don’t see why I should keep refusing my pay. As for consequences? Ha! What consequences? I, your grandfather, am Du Min Gyu, and even the Justicars will not stop me from doing as I please. Set your mind at ease boy, and speak your heart’s desire. Let these shoulders bear the cost for you, while they are still able.”
Lowering his head in thought, Kyung sheepishly said, “My request involves my siblings.”
“Yan and Song?” All this back and forth, and Kyung wanted to get his sisters a gift?
“No, not them. My... other siblings. Or half-siblings, at least.”
Ah. No wonder Kyung was so hesitant to speak. This involved no small number of half-cat slaves, slaves who now sold for a premium because Li Song and Kyung had both demonstrated superlative Martial skill. “You wish to reunite with them?”
“That would be... nice.” Raising his head with a mournful expression, Kyung switched to Sending and added, “But what I truly desire is for an end to my birth mother’s misery. Only then can I ensure that no more of my siblings are forced into slavery.”
Ah. No wonder he was so hesitant to ask. Kyung wanted Min Gyu to rescue an enslaved Ancestral Beast. No small request, but... “By hook or by crook, I will see this done.” Patting Kyung’s hand with a smile, Min Gyu nodded and said, “Nothing is too much for my grandson.”
First on the agenda for tomorrow was to find out who owned the wildcat Ancestral Beast, and whether or not they could be bullied into selling her for cheap. Unlikely, as any power owning one Ancestral Beast slave likely owned more, but if nothing else, Min Gyu could always go to Rain after he recovered and convince him to put pressure on the owner, if not outright strong arm them into selling. Who knows, with luck, this might all be solved within the week.
Now if only he believed that was true...
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As I lay in bed with Yan and Mila beside me, I realize I am truly, madly, deeply in love with them both.
It’s not fair to make them share my affections, but that just means I need to work harder to ensure they know they’re loved. I’ve been doing a shitty job of it so far, because I don’t think I’ve ever even taken either one out on a date. I never courted them, we just... ended up together, and while I am beyond grateful to have them in my life and cannot imagine what I would do without either one of them, I need to make sure they never come to regret their decision so long as I still draw breath.
Only up until then though, because if they come to regret marrying me after I die, then there’s nothing I can really do about it, so... yea.
Now that my body is asleep, it’s a lot easier to focus and think. Or maybe ‘think’ is the wrong word, because whatever contemplative efforts I’m doing can be done in the absence of a brain. That sounds bad, but what I mean is I am capable of independent thought without access to my physical brain or body, because that’s exactly what happened after I severed my connection to both. For almost three months, I was running solely off my soul’s capabilities, and even though I’ve since reconnected those severed ties, I’ve forgotten how to utilize the other two aspects.
It makes sense that the soul can be an independent, functioning entity though, especially considering my past struggles with split personalities. One personality took control of the mind and body while the other, the soul. That’s what the ‘throne’ within our Natal Palace is supposed to denote, control of one’s mind and body, which is why everyone else usually has their soul seated atop it. In Gen’s case, considering how much of his personality still bleeds through, I don’t think he’s ceded his throne to Zhen Shi, but rather has gone through a whole series of mental gymnastics to justify his decisions. He doesn’t want to be in control anymore, yet craves it all the same, so he pretends he isn’t in control while doing everything he’s told, because strange as it might sound, this is his way of taking control.
Confusing, but brains are complicated things, and souls probably even more so.
So currently, my working theory is that I completely abandoned my ‘throne’, so to speak, when I stepped out of my Natal Palace and into Zhen Shi’s trap. That’s why I almost died, because a body bereft of a soul cannot survive. No idea why, but it is what it is, so I can only continue to extrapolate from there. Then, I somehow returned to my body and established enough of a connection to keep it from dying, but also severed any and all unnecessary connections in order to seek out oblivion. That didn’t work out, but I might well have stumbled across something big.
I think all the big hoodoo I worked up during the battle against Bai Qi’s forces was only possible because I existed solely as a soul.
I mean, even though it was temporary and has since disappeared, I possessed a limited form of omniscience for a few minutes back then. I knew things I shouldn’t have known, could see things from hundreds of kilometres away, summoned a storm unlike any the Empire had ever before seen and did things even now I cannot wholly explain, all using the Energy of the Heavens. Were I still constrained by my physical being, I doubt my frail human mind could have parsed through all the information necessary to do all that, which I suppose explains why I have no idea how I did any of it, only the memory of having done it. Perhaps the human soul is uniquely equipped to handle Heavenly Energy in a way the mind and body cannot, but I’m not entirely sure why that is. I have my suspicions, namely that the soul is a vessel of emotion and experiences, things the Energy of the Heavens crave for some reason or the other, but beyond that, I have no earthly idea regarding the how, what, or why of it all.
However there’s still more to figure out, so much more it blows my mind. As always, the answers have only led me to uncover new questions, as I’ve realized emotion is only one part of the equation. Cuddling my pets and basking in the love of family is good for the soul, but then why was I so entranced by the sounds of the babbling river or the feel of the cool dirt pressed against my cheek? Why were my eyes drawn to the treetops to watch the wind whistling through the leaves, or the sunlight casting shadows across the grassy fields? The symmetry of Ping Ping’s jagged shell, the beauty of Pong Pong’s patterned markings, the way Sarankho’s snow-white fur shimmers when the light hits it just right, or how Roc spreads his wings to catch as much air as possible, I kept fixating on all these images and so many more, but I cannot understand why. There’s something about it all, something that draws me to it, but whenever I try to figure out why, it’s like walking into a room and forgetting why you’re there in the first place.
More clues to add to the massive pile of puzzle pieces I can’t fit together, mostly because I have no idea what the puzzle is supposed to depict. The mystery of the Heavens, or something like that, I suppose. Who knows? Clearly not me.
And you know what? That’s not the worst thing in the world. I don’t need all the answers, because I’m doing fine without them. Sure, things are a little weird right now, not being wholly in control of my actions and watching my life unfold like playing a game, but I think I know why I’m doing what I’m doing. Cuddling with family and floofs, taking in the sights and sounds, enjoying the delectable foods laid out before me, including the Spiritual Dumplings Tali somehow successfully whipped up. That’s my talented niece, and to be fair, Tate is only further behind because he’s too fixated on the horizon to see what’s in front of his face. No point telling him, because I can’t explain it and he won’t understand, but he’ll figure it out eventually. I believe in him.
Because at the end of the day, everything comes down to Balance, and Tate understands that well enough.
Not me though. For months, I severed away my emotions and sent them out into the world, right up until I realized I’d emptied out all the positive emotions and only had negative ones left to give. I Devoured what I could, but now I’m stuffed with gloom and doom, so now my body and mind are instinctively working to make new, happy emotions to fill the void within and Balance it all out. That’s one thing the Martial Path fails to emphasize enough. Balance isn’t just about taking things away, you can add something to the mix to even it out, though admittedly, that’s more difficult to get right. This being said, there’s no real math to it, not when it comes to mental health. You just gotta get up every day and work at it, because regardless of the emotion, too much left unrestrained will always come back to bite you in the ass.
Especially depression. That’s a heavy burden to bear, one I have yet to figure out how to carry well. It’s not as bad as it sounds, but it’s certainly not easy, at least not for someone like me, and so I lay in bed while the soothing sounds of my sleeping wives fill me with joy and appreciation. I’m glad we didn’t let ourselves get carried away, because I’m not really in control yet, so it would be weird to do anything more sexual. Luckily, my instincts are less pervy than my actual self, and my body is wholly content with just cuddling, though from the looks of things, both Yan and Mila are ready for more. More to look forward to when I fully recover, though I should also take them out on dates and woo them. Lin-Lin too, and maybe even Li-Li if she’s open to the idea of courtship, which isn’t as far-fetched as I once thought. No solid reasoning behind that, just a feeling, but still. As for Luo-Luo, she deserves to get to know me, the real me, before making a decision, so I need to have a heart to heart with her and help her make an informed decision, though I find myself hoping she stays. Yes, it’s not fair to the women in my life to have to share me among so many others, but I believe I am capable of making sure they never feel unloved or neglected, because I just have so much love to give.
Pong Pong notices before I do, but only because he’s always on the alert. Poking his head out from Mama Bun’s fur, he radiates an emotion I know all too well. Concern, but not personal, not entirely. No, this is concern on a more abstract scale, and while emotions aren’t all cut and dry, especially when coming from a turtle, I can still figure it out from contextual clues. Pong Pong wants to know if the sixty odd Experts converging around the District have ill-intent, and sadly, I believe they are. “Danger,” I pulse, followed by, “Reassurance.” Essentially, ‘I got this’, and I think I really do.
Responding to my focused Intent, my body slips out from Yan and Mila’s embrace without waking either of them, a delicate working of Concealment which I have no idea how to replicate. Mama Bun is not fooled however, and her head pops up in question, but I pet her head and pretend to head off to the bathroom like any other night. I’m not in control, or rather not entirely, in that my body does not respond to commands, but rather carries out my Intent in the best way it deems possible. Throwing on a robe as I slip out the door, I move through the Sound Barrier and stroll past two guards unseen, again utilizing Concealment and Domain in some complex, ineffable fashion. It isn’t until I’m well outside the District that I realize I probably should’ve asked for help, but I’ve already Cloud-Stepped too far away, and going back would put too many non-combatants in danger.
Besides, I don’t think my body would turn around even if I told it to. It responds to Intent, from which desire is only a stones-throw away, and tonight, I desire nothing more than to take my recently reforged Core and refined body for a spin.
My enemies have yet to notice my arrival, and I intend to take full advantage of the element of surprise. I will stealthily approaching them one by one and dispatch as many as I can without alerting the others. They’ll eventually notice they’re being hunted, but hopefully not before I thin out the herd, at which point I should hit and run to keep them on their toes. Spotting them through the darkness, I see that my foes carry Wraith blades, no doubt coated with their insidious, nerve-targeting poisons, which means it’s game over if I get cut. I supposed I should’ve stopped to pick up a weapon or something, but then again, Wraith blades will cut through anything that isn’t a Spiritual Weapon, and mine are all dust in the wind. I wonder if there’s any way to...
Huh.
What’s that? Sharp and unpleasant, like a jolt to the back of my brain.
Oh... Pain. It’s pain.
Glancing down, I find a black blade embedded in my belly, held by an oddly handsome Wraith, one who almost looks as surprised as I feel. Reviewing my memories of what just happened, I realize I might have overestimated my capabilities and bitten off more than I could chew. I arrived unseen and undetected, only the Wraiths weren’t heading to the manor, but actually using something to track my physical body. That’s how they found me here in this empty field, and as I was lost in my thoughts, I failed to notice this unmarred Wraith approaching, which led to my current predicament.
All this took an eternity to process, but in the real world, not even a tenth of a second had passed. Regardless of how quickly I came to terms with the situation, however, two facts remain unchanged.
This bastard just stabbed me, and I might be dying now.
...
Well... Fuck.
Chapter Meme