Liliana grit her teeth tightly behind her closed lip smile as she nodded at Fiona Wilde’s latest jibe disguised as common courtesy. Liliana felt like she was going insane. No one else seemed to detect the girl’s hidden venom in her words. Alistair was smiling and laughing, and Emyr was nodding along silently. Even the Earl and the Countess were smiling along.
Liliana could see now the vast difference between the home of a Duke and the home of an Earl. Their manor was perhaps a third of the size of the Rosengarde one. The wealth displayed was obviously lower, even if Liliana wasn’t too good at discerning the value of one painting or sculpture compared to another. The Countess was dressed in a fashion that mimicked the Duchess, though less overstated. It was obvious that the fabric was not of the same quality as Liliana's dress.
Fiona, the oldest and heir, was dressed far more ostentatiously, and her sense of fashion was the same as her mother’s, and the Duchess. Yet even with all the bright fabric adorning her, Liliana could see she wore less valuable fabric, and far fewer jewels than Liliana herself had dawned, and Liliana had thought she was being reserved with her choices. Charlotte, the middle child, was dressed less loudly than her sister or mother, and was far more demure than her sister. Bishop, the youngest Wilde child, was dressed rather plainly for a noble and seemed fairly bored with the entire affair. Liliana spied some dirt on the hem of his pants and privately thought the younger boy would perhaps be happier out on the training field than at a dinner.
Fiona and her mother had immediately set her on edge, Liliana mentally labeling them as enemies. Anyone who was part of her stepmother’s clique was no friend of hers, the few tea parties she’d attended of such company proving that true. This night did nothing to lessen her discrimination for the group either as Fiona shot barb after barb at her. Her mother at least had the sense to fake decorum.
“It must be so hard for someone like you, traveling such a long way. With no one but these boys and the guards for company. Such a hard thing for a young lady who has barely been out of her manor before this year,” Fiona said, portraying false sympathy in her voice and face.
Liliana could tell what she meant, how it must be so awful for a weak little commoner like herself to come along. How awful it must be for the guards and her brother and Emyr to have to put up with her. Not to mention the jab at her being kept cloistered in her home until this summer, when her father finally allowed her to join society. Though her lack of debut was still an obvious slight, as a noble she should’ve been granted one. Yet here she was, undebuted but part of society none the less. A glance to the side saw Alistair nodding along, not detecting any of the hidden duplicity in the girl’s words.
“I haven’t minded the company, and I do always have my Bond for companionship,” Liliana responded, trying not to grit her teeth. Couldn’t this girl focus on someone else? Why was she peppering Liliana with these questions? Couldn’t she be like the other vapid feather brains who only wanted to discuss her brother, or other young men their age?
“Oh yes, your Bond certainly helps, I’m sure. However, with everything that has happened, I’m sure it’s been hard on you, Lady Liliana. I mean, thank goodness you had such strong guards and companions around. I shudder at what could’ve come to pass had you been alone.” Fiona continued, fixing Liliana with a piercing green gaze. Liliana struggled to keep her own expression under control. Did Fiona think her some weak shrinking violet? Alluding to the assassination attempt at dinner? Did this girl have no shame? Liliana looked towards the girl’s parents and saw the countess quietly whispering to the earl. Neither seemed apt to shush their venomous spawn.
“Nothing we can’t handle has happened. I wasn’t alone, so it bears no need to consider the what if’s of a fantastical situation,” Liliana said, her voice strained as she looked down at her food, her hand gripping tightly to the fork. She wasn't sure if it was to hold herself back or to prepare herself to use it as a weapon. Her nerves were strung so tight it could be either option.
“Oh, of course! You have some very capable guards with you. Still, being on the road for so long, the powerful beasts that roam the lands, and the other threats, can make for a very stressful time. I’m sure it’s all been quite a trial for you, circumstances and your experience considered.” Fiona clarified, giving Liliana a kind smile. Or she tried. Liliana could read the mockery hidden in the girl’s verdant green eyes. This girl was trying to paint her as some poor damsel in distress that needed to be saved at every turn! As if she thought Liliana would fold at the first scary beast or torn dress she came across. Is this how the nobles saw her? Some idiotic and frail thing incapable of thinking and protecting herself?
“I’m sure for someone with as delicate a constitution as yourself, it would be difficult. However, I’ve found the trip to be rather invigorating. It’s exciting to see so much of the Rosengarde lands, and the beasts that populate its wild areas,” Liliana countered and she noticed the sharp glance Alistair sent her, as if she had said something wrong! How could he not see the way this girl was mocking her? Liliana fiddled with the pendant hanging from her neck with her spare hand as she felt irritation rising in her chest.
“It’s good to get a better idea of the Rosengarde territory. Maps are well and good, but nothing is better than actually seeing the territory with your own eyes. As Heir apparent, it has probably been an amazing learning opportunity for you, Alistair,” Earl Wilde chimed in with a nod, finally putting an end to Fiona’s blathering. Liliana resisted the urge to roll her eyes and sigh. Of course, the Earl was focused on Alistair, the heir. What good did it do for her to know the territory? So she knew how fucked she’d be if she ran away? That was obvious. On foot or on Lelantos, it would take her a month or more just to leave Rosengarde lands.
“Yes, Asher and I go over our lands at least twice a year, to be sure everyone is doing well. It’s helped us deal with many issues that would’ve grown out of control otherwise,” Countess Wilde chimed in, with a warm smile at the three visiting noble children. Alistair nodded along. He seemed to be soaking up the information as Liliana picked at her food.
“You have a viscountess and three baronesses in your area, right?” Alistair asked, and Liliana resisted the urge to pout. If they got started discussing all the nobles in the area, Liliana feared they’d never finish this dinner.
“Yes, as an Earl, I have a good amount of territory I oversee for your father,” Earl Wilde nodded along and Alistair leaned forward, interested.
“Then you’ve probably heard of the De-“ Alistair began, and Liliana kicked him, hard, in the shin. However, the way that Earl Wilde and the Countess’ faces closed off, Liliana thought her intervention came too late.
“Brother, don’t bring up such things at dinner,” Liliana reprimanded Alistair, her voice almost a hiss as her hands tightened around her fork. She needed him to drop this fruitless search for information on the assassins. At best, he’d get no information. At worst, he’d either get killed if the assassin syndicate took offense to it or he’d break his own heart finding out it was his mother who hired the assassin. Or, even worse, he’d find out and decide to side with his mother. Blood was stronger than water, right?
“I think I’ll be retiring to my study,” Earl Wilde said, and he stood up. He turned to the three teens and Liliana could see the strain at the sides of his eyes.
“Of course, Earl Wilde. I apologize for any impropriety,” Liliana was quick to apologize, shooting Alistair a glare. The boy didn’t look remorseful, his face was clouded in thought. The Earl’s eyes settled on her for a moment, and Liliana thought she detected a hint of disgust in his eyes. It immediately set her hackles up and anger simmering in her chest. The sooner they were out of this manor, the better.
“Yes, well, I know how excitable the youth can be. These old bones are simply tired. I hope you enjoyed your dinner, and sleep well. Be assured our security is heightened right now,” Earl Wilde informed them, his gaze resting on Liliana once more at the last line.
Liliana got a distinct feeling that he was implying the extra security was a hassle he didn’t want to entertain. However, his irritation could simply be directed at the way their dinner was ending, a soft voice in her head told her. The more reasonable side. Alistair had ruined the dinner with his remark and it was obvious the Earl was trying to recover somewhat. Alistair had insinuated that the Earl would have knowledge of an assassin group, which would imply dealings with them. It was an insult the Earl was likely only putting up with on account of their rank, ages and recent experiences.
Liliana stood, the boys following her, and she curtsied to the Earl. They could stay and continue eating, but it would be seen as another insult. The rest of the Earl’s family stood with them. The Earl bowed deeply and retreated.
“Fiona, could you show them to their rooms once more?” The Countess asked and her daughter nodded, smiling at the request. Liliana resisted the urge to groan. She was hoping to be done with the girl after dinner.
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As everyone departed, Alistair and Emyr followed Fiona. Liliana kept several steps behind them to distance herself as much as possible from the girl. She looked around the halls and found herself mentally comparing it to the Rosengarde manor. It was easier to distract herself with that than the poisonous ramblings of the girl in front of her.
“I know our manor is a bit confusing. Whenever one of the Baronesses visits us, they always seem to get lost!” Fiona was saying and Liliana scoffed quietly, or so she thought. But as three heads turned to her, she realized she’d been louder than she meant.
“Is something the matter, Lady Liliana?” Fiona asked, her fake smile still in place. Alistair was glaring at her, and Emyr was looking at her oddly, as if he couldn’t quite figure her out. Liliana ignored both their looks. Alistair had ruined their dinner, so she didn’t want to hear anything from him about manners.
“Oh, it’s nothing, Lady Fiona. Your house is quite quaint in comparison to the Rosengarde manor. Why, I think it’s almost the size of our west wing,” Liliana responded, ducking her head slightly and trying to hide her own smirk.
“Of course! My mistake, we haven’t visited the Rosengarde manor often. It must be much larger than our own manor, I'm sure you’re all used to complicated architecture,” Fiona recovered but Liliana spied the bit of dislike flaring in her eyes, and how her smile seemed even more strained when Fiona looked at her.
“Well, Father is a busy man. He doesn’t have the time to entertain guests at the manor often. Not when he has so much else to occupy his time,” Liliana continued, and she was fairly certain Alistair was about to try to grab her and cover her mouth, but she couldn’t stop. Something about Fiona just bothered her, and something in her was begging for a fight.
“Yes, I suppose a Duke would be rather busy. It must be hard for you all. With him so focused on the Duchy and the borders. I couldn’t imagine if my father was so busy, I fear I’d never see him! With so much occupying him, do you need to have appointments set up? Oh, I’m sure Lord Alistair, as the heir, likely you can see him often. But my heart hurts for you, Lady Liliana. You must not see much of your father.” Fiona continued, the girl sending a look of fake sympathy to Liliana. Liliana’s hands flexed, and she felt the urge to leap forward and rip the girl’s false mask right off her too pretty face. Liliana opened her mouth again to retaliate against the obvious slight when Alistair stepped in between the two girls.
“It can be difficult at times, but it’s an honor to be part of the Rosengarde family.” Alistair answered Fiona. Liliana glared at the back of her brother’s head. Fiona latched onto Alistair’s answer, though, and they finally moved forward once more.
“I’m sure. It wasn’t much of a surprise to my father when you were adopted. In fact, from the moment your mother and the Duke were engaged, he was telling all of us he was sure you’d be adopted! He told me you’d be a perfect heir for Rosengarde.” Fiona continued and Liliana ground her teeth.
How could the others not see that was a slight to her? Alistair’s adoption obliterated her possibility of being the heir. Since adoption involved Blood magic, it meant that Alistair had as much Rosengarde blood in him as Thornebell. With his pedigree, he immediately became the more desirable heir. As long as Alistair was alive, Liliana had no hope of becoming the heir.
If he and his mother weren’t around, I could be the heir. Liliana thought darkly. Somewhere in her mind, a voice spoke up, telling her she wanted nothing to do with being an heir. Or any of the responsibilities that came with being an heir. She ignored it. Being an heir was supposed to be her birthright. If Imogen hadn’t tricked the Duke into marrying her, Liliana would’ve become the next Duchess of the Rosengarde duchy.
Now, what did she have to look forward to? Sure, she could go to the Academy when she was sixteen, but what about after she graduated? She couldn’t become the Duchess, because Alistair would take the duchy when her father retired or died. Her mother didn’t have her own noble line for Liliana to seek title or land from. She could marry another noble, but while she had some good interactions with other nobles of her own age, she doubted it would translate to marriage offers. Even if it did, who was to say their families would be okay with it?
She’d need to depend on the generosity of her brother once he became the Duke, always living under his thumb. Everything she owned would be a gift from him. Never free, just exchanging one golden cage for another. She could run away and become an adventurer, but that life was hard. The death rates were astronomical, even for high-ranking adventurers. Any money she made would be funneled into paying for healers to fix whatever she broke in the most recent dungeons. Or into fixing her gear, or getting new gear for new dungeons. There was a reason adventurers didn’t all live in giant mansions, they simply didn’t make enough money for it. The guild took a sizable tithe of any money they made, and then they had to pay for everything else themselves.
She could become a crafter, but as much as she enjoyed Alchemy, she couldn’t say she was really any better than a novice. Her potions exploded fairly often, and her focus was split amongst so many other things she barely had the time to devote to truly learning a craft. It wasn’t like the game where you could become a master of a craft in a week. Or where you just clicked the ingredients, and it automatically made the item.
“Here's your room, Lady Liliana,” Fiona’s voice broke her from her thoughts and Liliana looked at the familiar door. She could’ve easily found her way without the girl’s help. She wasn’t an idiot and had remembered the way.
“Thank you,” Liliana murmured, the words tasting vile on her tongue. “The way was just as I remembered,” Liliana finished, unable to resist slipping in one last jab at the infuriating noble girl. She opened the door and before she shut it, she saw Fiona smiling oh so sweetly at her.
“Sleep well, Lady Liliana,” Fiona called out before the door shut.
That felt like a threat, Liliana thought, and as she walked deeper into her rooms, she started to shove furniture around. The room they had given her was small, maybe smaller than her original room at Rosengarde manor. Probably another slight to her. She was certain Alistair’s room was probably twice as big. After all, he was the heir, the future duke. They couldn’t risk slighting him.
When the room was open enough, Liliana released Lelantos from his stone. She’d elected to not leave him alone in the room after getting to the Wilde manor. Partially because she wasn’t sure he wouldn’t scare a wayward servant to death, and partially because she felt safer when he was with her. And she certainly did not feel safe in this manor.
Lelantos stretched when he was released and looked around the room, growling in slight annoyance when he saw how small the room was. Liliana placed a hand on his head and he rubbed against her chest, though he gave a suspicious sniff of the pendant hanging from her neck. He still didn’t like the pendant, but he didn’t try to stop her from wearing it.
Liliana would be more suspicious of the pendant if he outright hated the piece, but he showed it the same wary respect she knew he would of a stronger predator. Not fear, as one would show to a predator meaning them harm, but the wariness attributed to a dozing predator watching one pass through its territory. Most of her misgivings with the pendant had faded. It had done no harm to her, and instead gave her a small manner of comfort as she wore it.
“I know it’s small buddy, but we’ll be back on the road tomorrow,” Liliana soothed Lelantos, who seemed to sigh. He circled the floor a few times before flopping down. She knew the inns hadn’t been much more pleasant for the tiger. He really only enjoyed it when they were camping and he was free to run around as much as he wanted. But they both put up with it, it was a necessary discomfort to get where they needed to be.
A knock at her door had Liliana turning, half summoning her naginata to attack the intruder when a voice called out.
“Lady Liliana? It’s Janine, the maid, to help you get undressed?” A shy voice called out and Liliana relaxed, dismissing her weapon.
“Come in,” Liliana called out, and the maid walked in, freezing when she saw the lounging tiger. Liliana watched with amusement as the girl’s eyes widened, and she stopped breathing for a few moments. Liliana felt like she could almost hear the poor girl’s racing heart.
“Well?” Liliana called out, and her smile widened a bit when the girl jumped nearly a foot in the air. It was always nice to see someone scared of her, especially compared to the irritating Fiona. It made her feel powerful, to know people feared her and Lelantos. And what they could do. She found their fear another source of power. Fear forced respect. Something she got very little of in this world.
I wouldn’t hurt them though, not really, Liliana thought. She wasn’t the type to hurt others just for a rush of power. She’d never wanted that. That would be too much like the original Liliana, the villainess.
Would being a villainess be that bad? She had power, and a place in this world. No one dared insult her, they feared her too much. A soft, dark voice whispered in her mind, but Liliana shoved it down, far down. No, she wouldn’t become that. It wasn’t worth the cost. The memories of what she’d written of her nightmares only further reinforced that. She would never turn down that path.
“Yes! Let me help you, Lady Liliana!” The maid recovered and scampered to Liliana’s side. She gave a wide berth to Lelantos, who hadn’t even been watching the girl. He was watching Liliana and she would swear he was thinking. Not to say he couldn’t think, but as a beast, his thought process was far more simple than a human’s. He was more reactionary in his thoughts, instinct driven. Yet Liliana could feel him thinking. She left him to it. It was good to see him changing because of the Soul bond, it would make him an even more powerful partner.
In record time, the girl had Liliana switched from her dress into her sleeping shift. Liliana supposed the girl wanted away from the tiger as soon as possible, based on the many looks she sent his way and with how her hands trembled and shook. With a promise to be back the next morning to help her bathe and dress once more, Janine left in a rush. Liliana almost warned her that fast movements like that only tended to make predators chase after you but held off, the girl was petrified enough. Anything more would be cruel, and a soft city-born maid likely wouldn’t encounter many predators in her life. Not of the animal kind, anyway.
Liliana snuggled down into the covers and felt her mind slipping away. The exhaustion from days of barely enough sleep finally coming to call on her. A beam of moonlight fell past the curtains and onto the pendant still resting on her chest, lighting it up in ghostly gray and blue as her eyes finally closed.