Gwen took a step behind Kronke. “What is that?”

Cal didn’t really want to say it out loud. Because standing in front of him was evidence that the Withering Apocalypse had gone full Decaisy. That was a Void Imp.

The imp looked each of them over, and likely deciding Cal was the weakest—which was definitely true physically, although he did have other strengths—it hissed and lunged for the elven mage.

Cal threw up his Ruby Staff to block the onslaught and wished that he’d learned anything about fighting from his siblings when he had the chance, but that wasn’t who he was. He’d always been an accountant at heart, and he supposed now he would die a defenseless accountant at the hands of a Void Imp.

Kronke took one lumbering step between Cal and the imp and swung the Pink Reaper Scythe as easily as though he were fanning a hot pan before loading up the next batch of cookies to bake. The razor-sharp scythe cut cleanly through the imp’s neck, literally tearing the screech from its throat as its head sailed across the room and landed in one of the reed baskets.

“Five points for the Pink Reaper,” Gwen said.

“And good riddance to ye.” Helga poked at the headless corpse with her crowbar. That was a big departure from her usual elegy recitation after the death of a dungeoneer, but they all knew that was no dungeoneer. She turned to Cal. “Now ye want to tell us what we’re up against here, lad?”

Cal hung his head. They hadn’t even made it past the first level. He thought they’d be in the inner sanctum by now trying to conduct the Omega Audit. He’d been worried that he wouldn’t be able to connect the Omega Audit Crystal since he wasn’t a dungeon core, but now he had bigger worries. Much bigger. They may not make it to the sanctum at all.

He took a deep breath and faced his team. “That was a Void Imp.”

“I knew it!” Gwen said.

“Dead now,” Kronke offered optimistically. He still leaned on his scythe for support, but the sweat had stopped beading at his temples, and his skin had returned to its normal vibrant green hue.

“Yes, thanks, big guy,” Cal said. “That was very helpful. I appreciate not getting ripped to shreds, but that’s the second imp we’ve seen now. The creature that nearly knocked Helga and Hurricane off the bridge into the Howling Chasm was also one. I couldn’t be sure at the time, and I didn’t want to draw any conclusion prematurely. But my suspicions are fully confirmed now. And sadly for us, where there is one, there are many.”

“We can take them, lad,” Helga said.

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Cal cleared his throat. “There’s more.”

“Of course there is.” Gwen threw her hands up in the air. “There’s always more. Next you’re going to tell us there’s a whole guild of dungeoneers headed our way to make sure your family finished off the job and scrounge for any leftover loot they can find. Out with it, Cal.”

“The good news is that, as far as I know, that is not the case, Gwen. As a general rule, no one scavenges after the Illuderati because they are notorious for leaving nothing behind.”

“I’m not sure that’s good news, but go ahead and give us the bad,” Gwen said.

“Void Imps are one of the first and surest signs of a Decaisy Apocalypse.”

Helga and Gwen gasped.

Kronke shrugged. “Decaisy not sound so bad. Sound like flour to bake. Telazey flour best for soft cakes.”

“Not quite the same, Kronke,” Cal said. “In a Decaisy Apocalypse, a rip in our existence opens from the Void, a place beyond the reach of the Tree of Souls, a place devoid of Apothos. Its creatures, though, hunger for it, and they will sniff out the lingering Apothos from a world blighted by a Withering Apocalypse and push through the Rift. If left unchecked, they will overrun the dying world and threaten the Tree of Souls itself with their rot.”

Kronke looked aghast. “That not like soft cake at all!”

“Do ye think we have time to complete our audit?” Helga asked. “Should we call for help?”

“I don’t know,” Cal said. “I hadn’t expected the apocalypse to progress this quickly.”

“I don’t want to fight any more of those imps,” Gwen said, “but the second Pat Flux and Red Reeves get word that we’ve seen signs of the Decaisy, they’ll pop through those portals and leave us and the rest of the Teeklish stranded faster than you could melt Ruby’s candy. And I doubt Weavelord is gonna jump at the chance to meet a Void Imp face-to-face. I told you he was sending us on a suicide mission. He really does hate us that much.”

Cal wanted to reassure her that her father wasn’t actually trying to kill them, but given the evidence, he couldn’t make that argument right now. “Even if he wanted to help us, we have to place the call through an ARRDUDE, the Automated Response Representative of the Department of Universal Dungeon Efficiency. And once we got through, it would take him a while to find the Emergency Audit Assistance Authorization Form, EAAF 9, and file with the appropriate section of the Advanced Apocalypse Remediation Team. And of course, they would need to convene the Advanced Apocalypse Remediation Council for approval—”

Gwen snapped her fingers in front of Cal’s face. “Cal, you’re doing it again. We don’t have time for the acronym olympics. We get it. Lots of red tape. They wouldn’t get here in time. It’s up to us to save the universe and all. So are we doing this or what?”

He wanted to point out that technically, most of those were initialisms not acronyms, but the annoyed look on her face convinced him that now was not the time for that kind of precision. Now was the time for action. That’s why they’d come here after all. He’d known the risks when he’d taken the Omega Audit assignment for his team. He just hadn’t imagined how many razor-sharp teeth those risks would come with.

Cal loosened his collar as he surveyed the faces of his team.

“Aye, by me second cousin’s lucky clover, give me auditing or give me death!” Helga declared.

“Kronke follow Cal. Decaisy not stop Kronke.”

Gwen sighed. “I’ve made dumber decisions, I’m sure. Although I can’t recall them right now. In for an Aldaleeran penny, in for a Decaisy Apocalypse.”

Cal knew he could count on his team. He hoped he wouldn’t let them down. “Let’s audit!”