Well he wasn’t missing an arm…..it wasn’t it like it decided to say [Well thanks body for your time…but I decided I’d like to do a world tour…]

I just bit it off…so it’s not missing missing…just in my slimy body…

I quietly opened my mouth and handed it to him.

The Abbe looked at his half chewed arm and took it from me swiftly; lest I decide to change my mind.

He slowly cast a heal spell on it and the arm began to glow green.

He then took the “healed” arm and stuck it in his joint and began chanting some heal spell…small blood like tentacles moved out from the open gash in his shoulder and began stitching itself back with the lost arm…. it looked like it hurt like crazy.

*I am so sorry!*

It took an hour but the Abbe’s arm was stuck on to his body….as good as new? I hope…

The Abbe sighed as he looked at me.

I looked at me….

Holy saints! I have been crucified to the ground!

My body was nailed to the ground in three different area by an invisible force.

My head region was near the Abbe.  My torso with Maylon and Gustav had my legs….well the order could be reversed…I mean what is a leg and an arm for a slime? The classification was based on where my bones lay no the slime

No one was looking happy. No quite the opposite of happy.

Maylon was angry.

Gustav was emitting a blood thirst that he had previously displayed.

The Abbe too was angry? No…I think the Abbe was disappointed.

“I am okay now…” I murmur softly.

The Abbe raises his hand and I can feel the pressure holding me down dissipate.

I have no idea what happened.

Before I can offer an explanation or an excuse the Abbe speaks up, “You are a monster…it is only natural that you go on a rampage...”

That was cruel. Maybe uncalled for. Maybe could have been worded better. It hurt.

I don’t care what these NPCs think of me, but it hurt.

Is it because my unintended actions are being misunderstood. Because I am being misunderstood?

I want to say sorry. But the words are being choked in my mouth.

Even if I say it, will they understand me? Will they believe me?

I am disturbed. I cannot explain why I did what I did.

I cannot explain blacking out in a game.

I cannot explain anything.

This game is testing me and I am being tested.

The very fabric of my beliefs that this is a game and not my reality is being tested with the emotions that I am feeling towards NPCs.

NPCs are not real people yet…I find myself doubting that my Guardians are NPCs.

In fact….now that I am on this tangent….I do question what is real and what is not?

Am I in a game?

Or have I been transported to another world?

This game is testing me.

I fear I may be incapable of distinguishing game from reality. This is affecting my judgement as a gamer.

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

When people play games, you can take advantage of bugs, players and NPCs without conscience interfering.

This is why I can’t say sorry.

NPC’s don’t care if I say sorry or not.

No…NPC’s might care if I need to build relationship points etc. However, the one who shouldn’t be caring about it so much is me.

However, right now….I find myself caring about these relationships.

I am frightened by the idea my notion of gaming and reality may be merging.

I won’t say sorry, not because I don’t want to maintain relationships with them but because I need to keep some gap from the fake and the real.

***

No one spoke to me for the remainder of the time. As the sun came up, I got into my hole and others left without speaking a word to me.

Over the course of the next few days I realized that the fragile trust that I had managed to build between Gustav and myself had crumbled.

Maylon’s distrust towards me has been fuelled by my actions.

And the Abbe? I don’t know.  He was neither angry or upset. He wasn’t even disappointed anymore. He just stopped talking.

Should I be grateful for that? I don’t know.

I am not some hikikomori that doesn’t understand relationships. Hikikomori…I felt a nostalgic when using this word….felt like a lost memory from long ago.

I digress. However, I have a feeling that hikkikomori is a very important memory to me.

I believe our journey would have continued in complete silence had it not been for the discovery…of a town.

Yes, a town.

Day 99 – we finally found a town.

Maybe an outpost of some sort. No one is sharing the details with me.

It’s still pretty far from where we are. However, at most it seems to be a day’s walk.

Not a town….if I can see it from so far…probably a large city…but then again I have the Cyclops’ eye. It’s like having a telescope for an eye.

“There is a town coming up.” I let the others know.

I think that was the first time I saw color returning everyone’s faces.

Maylon even tried to secretly conceal her smile.

I am not sure why she bothered to do so….and Gustav ran towards the town….

The only one frowning was the Abbe.

Why?

The Abbe raised his hand; motioning us to stop and then turned towards me.

“We need to talk.”

“okay…” I am really clueless what he wants from me.

“You need to more about this world; otherwise you may endanger our very lives.”

I am trying to think what could I possibly do that is more dangerous than attacking them?

:?:

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