Vinnie the Eel loved being the demigod of a religious cult run by a bunch of chicken creatures, (for it reminded him of the days he was head honcho in his gang) but the Thunderbawks were taking their cultist affairs much too far. As soon as they started dancing with spears around the bonfire where his friends were tied up, chanting "ooga chuga, ooga chuga," he knew it was time to stand up and say, "no more!". Especially when the apple of his eyes was strapped to the bundle of wood and ready to burn to a crisp.

"Vinnie," Monica cried. "You know I hate being a damsel in distress so just get your culata over here and save us!"

Ramone smiled and blushed. "Yoo hoo! I don't mind being a damsel in distress, so please save me too!"

Vinnie held his hand out dramatically, "Coming my darling Mamacita, and I don't mean you Ramone!" he bellowed in his deep voice and leapt from his guilded seat with the grace of a ballet dancer.

The Thunderbawks paid him no mind and continued to ritualistically twirl in front of the bonfire. "Get your hands off dat beautiful senorita and all my platonic friends too!"

"Thanks for saying that," Chloe muttered rolling her eyes. "I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot lightning rod!"

The Thunderbawks all turned to him and pointed their spears at him.

"No. Vinnicus," one of them said. "They must burn so your powers are satisfied….bawk. Me say sit in your seat like good boy."

Vinnie's hands transformed into his pet eels. "I am many tings, chickenboy. But a good boy ain't one of dem!"

Vinnie fired an electrical current at the Thunderbawk and next thing everyone knew, there was a roast bawk on the ground. "Does anyone smell friend chicken," it asked. "Or just me."

"It definitely just you!" one of them answered.

"Quickly!" King Featherbutt shouted. "Seize him before he turns this place into a fast food restaurant.

The Thunderbawks all surrounded Vinnie with their spears. "Uh oh…" he muttered looking everywhere. His electric eels crackled but no lightning blasted out.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

"Gots to recharge," he muttered.

The fire kept burning around his friends with everyone frantically trying to blow out the flames. Ramone even took to stepping on the fire with his dress shoes.

"Time to surrender, Vinnicus!" King Featherbutt laughed. "Let us carry out this sacrifice in your name! I swear, you are the worst guest of honor!"

All of his friends, even young Sunny/Laura called his name.

Vinnie's eyes scanned around him. Surely there was something he could do. Then his eyes locked on the towering statue of Electra in front of the temple. It was so gaudy and shiny that it made everything else pale in comparison. Vinnie thought of King Featherbutt's words and suddenly, he had an idea. "It's a long shot," he muttered. "But my whole life's been a gamble!"

Electricity surged in Vinnie's veins. He aimed his electric eels hands straight at the statue. "Awright you old broad of a god!" he cried. "Prepare to get a shock to yer statue."

With a loud crackle, lightning erupted from his arm. It blasted past the bonfire and zoomed straight into the face of Electra.

The electricity rattled around the metallic statue loudly. And the ensuing silence that followed made sure it was even louder.

"What the BAWK!" King Featherbutt exclaimed. "Why did you do…"

Thunder roared from the sky as ominous clouds swirled around the center of the jungle. A glamorous green eye appeared at the center of the storm. A husky and very vivacious voice rumbled from the storm clouds. "WHO DARES DAMAGE MY VISAGE OF BEAUTY AND PERFECTION?"

"Dat would be…moi!" Vinnie exclaimed.

There was a loud screech and lightning streaked straight from the sky into the top of fire wood. There was a big white flash and a loud kaboom. Everyone shielded their eyes as wooden debris tumbled all over the place. Once Vinnie opened his eyes, he saw all of his friends a bit brown and charred but still breathing. He ran to Monica and grasped her hand. He looked deeply into her eyes. She wearily opened them. "Nice going, cabro!" she said, somewhat annoyed and relieved at the same time. "Not sure if you saved me or burned me alive!"

"Worry not, my dearest Mamacita!" Vinnie exclaimed. "You may be a bit burned, but it is truly I who is burning for yous!"

Monica muttered. "The only thing that burns hotter than hellfire is your passion for stupid puns."

There was a loud cackle and everyone turned to the center where the bonfire once was. Instead of the sacrificial bonfire, standing at seven feet tall was a woman in a buxom business suit, lightning bolt shaped pony tail, purple pumps and piercing green eyes behind stylish reading glasses. It was the goddess herself, Electra.

"Spark my words!" she said, electricity dancing on her finger tips. "I'm gonna put the mega hertz on the fiend who defaced my statue."