Chapter 47: Tomato murder
Felix Sythias’ POV (continued):
After a moment of thinking, I shook my head. The choice was easy—I wouldn’t tell him. If he didn’t tell me, he probably didn’t want me to know. It would only cause unnecessary trouble. It wasn’t my business.
Why did he not want me to know, though? I was his friend, wasn’t I? I was also—at the time—the only gay person he knew, so you’d think he’d talk to me about it. Maybe he’d wanted to be sure before telling me? I could totally see him doing that.
I stood outside the door, thinking about it for a while. A few people passing by gave me a strange look, but I ignored them. Eventually I made a bit of a realization—why should he tell me? And why did I expect him to? That wasn’t fair of me. We were friends, not soulmates; we both had secrets and things we kept to ourselves. It was entirely possible this was one of those subjects. Maybe he wanted to keep his dating life private. Given the circumstances of his upbringing, I couldn’t blame him if that was the reason. Not that I could blame him for any other reason, either. I wasn’t entitled to know everything about his life.
There was another possibility too, that he thought it might upset me. That would’ve been a valid reason honestly—I’m not sure how I would’ve reacted to him telling me he was considering dating someone other than me. While I probably wouldn’t have been angry, I would’ve gotten sad for sure. But why would he have thought that, though? I couldn’t think of a good reason. I don’t think I was even aware of my growing crush on Alex back then, let alone him.
I sighed and pushed the thoughts away. They didn’t matter, I’d just keep it all to myself, anyway. I pushed the door open and walked inside. To my surprise, Alex wasn’t here yet. Part of me wanted to go look for him, but I still had homework to finish, and I didn’t know where to look for Alex, anyway. Besides, I wanted to push my progress with the lightning cube further, too. I was making rapid improvements to my ability to reabsorb the mana. There was a pretty large chance I’d get to a hundred percent this weekend.
But then what? Anybody else would unlock a relevant Skill when they got to that point, if they hadn’t yet earlier, to grant them the Affinity. But I wouldn’t. Professor Hobold and I hadn’t really discussed it as I hadn’t made it that far yet, but it was probably going to be difficult. I was going to be the first to manually unlock an Affinity like that, and that was exciting as much as it was worrying. With no one else to pave the path, I would be figuring most of this out all by myself—a trailblazer.
First though, I’d have to finish with the cube. I sat down on the carpet and took it out. No better moment than now, I suppose.
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Professor Hobold watched me the next day as I drew some mana from my pool and into the crystal at the top of the cube. I flicked my tongue out like a snake and I could taste the mana building up for the smallest moment, before it arced back out, and into my claw. I took it in, letting it build up inside me like I was a capacitor—which was a strange device for storing electric charge that the professor taught us about. It wasn’t entirely accurate, but it was only for my mental image so it didn’t have to be. Then I let the mana flow through my veins as if they were copper wires, all the way back to my mana pool. Some of it was lost on the way, leaking out, while some of it refused to listen and shocked me instead, but more than half did as I instructed and flowed right back into my pool.
I wanted to pay close attention to the ‘border’ of the pool to see how the lightning mana became neutral again, but every time I did, I lost control over the mana coming back in.
And if that wasn’t bad enough, it also hurt something awful when that happened. The lightning mana would be spread out through my veins, so when I lost control of it, it gave me a really nasty shock throughout my entire arm, and right down to my belly where my pool sat. So for now I just focussed on getting this done. When this was second nature, I’d try looking again.
“Well done, Felix. If you keep this up, you’ll get there in no time.”
I smiled at the man. He was a little short-tempered sometimes, but he was still kind. “Thank you, professor. What should I do next then, though? Unlocking a relevant Skill will be difficult with my condition.”
Professor Hobold rubbed his chin. “I’m not sure. Why don’t you stay after class and we can talk about it when there aren’t so many ears listening in…” He trailed off, looking over my head. I turned to follow his gaze and saw he looked at Alex. “Huh. That was fast,” he said. I was confused, but then it clicked. Did Alex really succeed with the cube already?
Alex himself was hunched over his desk, the cube in his hands and his snout scrunched up in concentration. Then he flinched as he got shocked. It didn’t do anything to stifle his excitement, though, as he looked up at me with a wide grin on his face.
“You did it?” I asked. It was a pointless question, but it broke the silence.
“Yeah! I tried some of the things you kept mentioning and saying, and it was finally enough to break the threshold!”
“That’s great! You’ll have that Skill in no time at all!”
Professor Hobold tapped my shoulder. “I think you’re all set for now. Do you mind if I go help your friend?”
I shook my head. “I’ll be fine. I’ll stay after class if you don’t mind, though.”
“Not at all. I’m sure I’ll enjoy the challenge.”
Professor Hobold hobbled off to help Alex, and I went back to my own cube. I wanted to have this done before the extra training started next Monday. With a bit of luck, I could even begin practicing with lightning magic then.
After class, I said goodbye to Alex, as I wouldn’t be seeing him again until well into the evening. He would be hanging out with Viggi. I’d already planned for some fun by myself while I had the room to my lonesome, and I was feeling a little giddy looking forward to it. That was for later though, for now I had a conversation with professor Hobold to focus on.
I stayed behind to talk to him. I did have another class, but Advanced Elementalism had been fruitless, and I already talked to the professor of the class to make a deal. I could come whenever I felt like it, and I would share any findings I made if I managed to figure something out. It worked for both of us.
My talk with professor Hobold didn’t get me much. It boiled down to: finish this first, then we’ll see. He had no clue, and I didn’t either. We did manage to make a few plans, though. Like paying close attention to the conversion of the mana once it was all second nature. I’d try all our ideas out, but I wasn’t all that hopeful. In the end, I was probably going to have to figure this out all by myself, just like I’d feared.
At least Alex was having more luck. He’d probably have a basic lightning magic Skill by the end of next week, if not sooner. If he could then apply that to his sword… well, the excursion would suddenly become a lot easier.
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Alex Sandclaw’s POV:
Magic 101 was as tedious as usual, but that was fine. The theory was fascinating and I was making great progress with drawing on my mana. I’d gone from succeeding once every ten tries, to once every four tries. With Felix’s tips and advice, combined with professor Sesharan's great teaching skills and Skills, I was improving at a ludicrous rate. Most of the other students here were only just now succeeding with drawing on their mana at all.
I was practicing extra hard this period, and I’d already leveled up my [mana manipulation] several times today alone. I really wanted to be able to reliably draw on my mana before the excursion. And at this rate, that might just happen.
I really wasn’t looking forward to that excursion. Just because I was good with a sword didn’t mean I wanted to slice monsters apart. Though, I had to admit it had been fun to hunt those goblins with Felix—before the surprise attack by the dire bear, anyway. Maybe it could be fun now, too? There would be high-level people protecting us, and it wouldn’t be just fighting. We would be learning other skills as well, like survival. The excursion might just be fun after all, especially since I was teaming up with Felix and Tiki.
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Fighting still worried me, though. Even from Felix’s back, there would be risk. And I wouldn’t be staying on Felix’s back all the time, especially in the narrower tunnels. No, I’d have to fight by myself, and probably most of the time, too. Maybe I should follow Felix’s advice and talk to professor Scott on Monday. I hadn’t done so yet because professor Scott seemed like he was busy enough without trying to help me. But Felix had said he would be happy to help, and I trusted Felix. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to ask, would it?
After class, I waited outside. I was sitting some distance away from the building on a bench clearly visible from above. A few minutes later, Viggi all but fell from the sky and into the seat next to me, startling me and making me jump and hit my tail painfully on the back of the bench.
“Was that really necessary?” I asked as I rubbed the sore spot on my tail.
He shot me a sheepish grin. “Sorry, I guess I got a little too excited. Are you ready to go?”
Viggi and I were spending the afternoon together until it was time to leave for the support group meeting. It was my idea. I wanted to know what it was like to spend time with just him, without Felix, Sekara, or Hugo just around the corner. I hoped it would help me decide whether to go on that date with him, even though deep down I already knew the answer.
“Yeah, let’s go.” Viggi smiled and grabbed my arms, as if to lift me up. My eyes widened as I realized what he was trying to do and I quickly stepped backwards, out of his grip. “Can we walk, please?”
“Oh, um—yeah, sure! Haven’t you flown before with Felix, though?”
“I have, but it’s not the same. I guess it just feels safer when I’m sitting in his saddle, as opposed to you just holding me.”
“Fair. I wouldn’t have dropped you though. I ferry my classmates around all the time.”
I just nodded and said no more on the matter and instead asked about his day. We talked about our classes all the way to his dorm, which was a few islands over, together with the other buildings for the second-years. It all looked surprisingly similar. The only differences were that the main school building was larger and had more facilities outside the main complex. The dorms were basically just the same, though none of them had a tower like ours did. Which made sense, since that had been specially built for Felix. It did make me wonder how that would be handled for next year, though. Would he just be staying at the tower and have to fly to the other islands every day, or would they build a new dorm building again? I’d have to ask later, if I didn’t forget.
The students here were the same mix of species, though they were of a higher level. It was honestly a little weird to be surrounded by so many higher-leveled people of my age. They were all a year older at most with few exceptions, but had more than triple my level at the very least. I made sure to be respectful to each one who greeted us, of which there were quite a lot—it seemed Viggi was friendly with a lot of his classmates.
His room was the same as mine had been before I moved into Felix’s. A bed to the side, bookcases lining the other wall, and very hot. Hotter than Felix’s room even, and a little too hot for my liking.
“You like things hot, huh?”
He smirked at me. “Are you talking about the posters or the temperature?”
I glanced at the wall and noticed several framed posters of naked lizardkin—both men and women—exposing their private parts, that I hadn’t noticed before. I quickly looked away from the one of a man spreading his slit open for all to see—I couldn’t deny it was hot, though.
“The temperature.” I mumbled.
“I’m really sorry about that,” Viggi said, rushing over to the wall. “Give me a moment, I’ll take them down. I completely forgot to do it earlier.”
I looked at the floor, and he took them down, hiding them away underneath his bed.
“Sorry again, I’m usually the only one in here, so they don’t bother anyone. I should’ve remembered to put them away this morning, but I was in a bit of a rush. I stayed up too late.”
“It’s fine, I just didn’t expect to see that. Can… can I ask where you got them, though?”
“Sure. There’s this shop down in the main district that sells anything from small drawings, to large posters, to toys, to oil paintings. Of any sapient species—except dragons, since there’s a ban on that. I can show you sometime if you want.”
“No, that’s fine,” I said, though I filed the information away for later, when I had money to spend.
After that embarrassing moment, Viggi pulled out a board game, and we started playing it. It was one he showed me before: Capitalism. You had to roll a die and move forward a bunch of spots, with each spot being a city. You then had to either buy the city or move on. And if it was already bought, you had to pay the player who owned it some amount of fake money. The cities were named after important places, and each set of three or four spots made a world. And if you had all spots for a world, you could build better teleporters to increase the amount someone had to play if they landed on it. The first player to run out of money lost.
It was fun, but we weren’t able to finish it today, so Viggi noted down where we left off and stored the game away. We’d finish it some other time, since right now we had to cook a bunch of food. I was keeping my promise from last week of taking good food with me to the next meeting, and Viggi was more than willing to help. Which was good, since I wasn’t a particularly great cook.
Thinking of the food made me think of the meeting. I’d had all week to think about it, but I’d settled on a question I wanted to ask the group—what was a gay relationship like?
I just didn’t know. All I had to go on was two books I’d read, and neither had been particularly good examples. The first had primarily been an action mystery, and the second one was just not that well written, so I found it hard to trust anything it had told me. Aside from one short story from Scales in the night—which had been very sweet—I hadn’t yet had the time to start reading the three new books I’d gotten. I didn’t think they were going to give me the answers I was looking for, though. The group, however, just might.
I glanced at Viggi as he cut into a tomato with disturbing vigor—he must not like tomatoes. Had he had a relationship before? He’d alluded to it, but had never actually confirmed it. I could just ask, though, couldn’t I? He’d tell me if it was too personal.
“Hey Viggi, can I ask you something?”
He looked up from the blood-red tomato. “Sure. What’s up?”
“Have you ever been in a relationship before? The romantic kind, I mean.”
He sighed. “I have, sort of. It’s not the happiest story, though. Are you sure you want to hear it?”
“Only if you’re comfortable telling it.”
He shrugged. “It happened a few years ago. I’ve been over it again and again with my therapists, my dad, and some friends, so I’ve gotten pretty comfortable with it.” He put the knife down and leaned on the counter. “His name was Rolf. We grew up together, and he was my best friend at the time. One night after a party, we were both a little drunk, and one thing led to another, and we kissed. Not soon after, we were rolling around in my bed rubbing our bits together. We both chose to forget it, but by the end of the week he was back at my door, anyway. It kept repeating again, and again. Both of us promising to forget and hooking up again the next week. Eventually I realized I was starting to fall in love with him and I wanted more, a real relationship, and told him as much. He said he liked me too, but kept putting the decision off, saying he needed more time to figure his feelings out. Eventually, after a year, I realized nothing was ever going to happen. Maybe he was too scared, or maybe he just wanted the sex. I’ll never know.”
“I’m really sorry that happened,” I said after a moment of silence. “I see why you wanted the time limit now.”
He smiled a sad smile.
“Yeah. I, uh, really don’t want that to happen again. So please, don’t stretch your decision out longer than you have to.”
I shook my head. “I won’t.” He smiled a sad smile, though I didn’t quite understand why. This was good news, right? “Can I ask what happened after you realized that?”
He nodded. “I confronted him. He tried to play it off again, so I left. By that time I had gotten thoroughly enough of the city and the constant fear and wariness of being found out. While I’d been realizing I was gay, I had started noticing the bad stuff more and more. When I got home, I started packing my bags. My mom noticed and asked why. I didn’t really have an excuse, so I just told the truth. I was leaving because I was gay and I’d had enough. We got into a fight and I left. I don’t think I’ve ever felt more alone than those few days it took before my father decided to go after me. He never really talks about it, but I think he got in a fight with my mom because she let me go out all by myself. So he followed to make sure I was safe. When he realized I wasn’t going to come back, he just came with me, instead.”
I opened my maw to respond, but no words came out. No words would be enough. I could feel myself tearing up already, his story making memories of my own float back to the surface from where I’d buried them deep underground. So instead I closed the distance and did the only thing I thought would convey my feelings on the matter—I gave him a hug. Viggi was surprised, but hugged me back. I was sure I heard him sniffle, too.
After a moment, I found the words I was missing just a moment ago. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Your father sounds like a great man.”
I could feel Viggi smile from where his snout was pressed against me. “He is, yeah. My story is not that special, though. Many lizardkin I’ve met have gone through worse.”
I stepped back and shook my head at him. I channeled my inner Felix and tried to say the right thing, just like he would have if he’d been here. “That doesn’t make your experience any lesser, Viggi. You went through something awful and you’re allowed to feel about that however you want, even if someone else went through something ‘worse’.”
His smile faded a little. “I know, I know. This is just… easier.”
Following his hint, I dropped the subject—for now—and picked up the knife. “Well, if you want to talk about it, I’m your friend now, and my shoulder is always there to cry on. For now, though, wanna keep murdering this tomato?”
“Friends, huh? I guess that works, too.” He said, and I realized Viggi also already knew. He smiled and nodded. “Come on then, that tomato won’t know what hit it.”