Matt stepped back, gaping. What the hell just happened? He didn’t know whether he was more shocked that Brett was here or that Dirk had just punched him.

Brett clutched at his face and Dirk was making a pulling motion in the air.

“Rrrah!” Dirk yelled. “You damned lucky bastard. I’ll just have to use my fists.” He lumbered forward, closing the gap between him and Brett.

“Woah, let’s be calm,” said Cathleen. The blue from the stained glass window colored her face, artfully contrasting with the pink of the glowstick on her forehead.

“Calm, my ass,” Dirk huffed from beneath his hood.

“Matt?” Brett pleaded.

This jerk wants MY help? Matt thought.

“What’s going on here?” Fallyn said.

“That’s the fucking guy,” Dirk said loudly, pointing. “That’s the fucking guy! Were you in on it too?” He locked eyes with Cathleen. “And you?” He glared at Maria who slowly shrank into her Snuggie. “Fuckers, all o’ you!”

“Maybe we let ‘em kill each other?” Val whispered from Matt’s side.

Matt opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out. She smiled and held up both hands, then Kurtis mirrored the gesture. He now wore the silver colander on his head and, somehow, it had two openings for his cat ears.

“Let’s start again,” Cathleen said sternly. “I’m Cathleen. This is That Guy—we call him Guy—and Maria. Guy, Maria, this is Matt, Val, Kurtis, Fallyn, and their two new friends. I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your names?”

“Sofia and Dirk,” Sofia answered coldly.

“We also have George in our group,” Brett-Guy said, pawing tenderly at his cheek. “You remember him, right Matt?”

What the fuck?

“It’s him,” Dirk grumbled to Sofia. “The antlers on his arm.”

“You killed us,” Sofia stated. “And then you killed us again. And then another time.”

“Are those the gankers?” someone whispered from the crowd.

“You took my swords,” Dirk said.

“I would never do such a thing,” Brett said all too smoothly. He cocked his head and his jet-black hair traveled with it as a solid block. “I’m sure these hypothetical weapons were bound to you. So, what would I want with them?”

“You’d want to be an ass is what!” yelled Dirk.

“Gankers!” another whisper from behind Matt.

“Hey guys, what I miss? What’s up?” George strode up to their circle.

Matt found himself gaping again, despite being warned.

“Oh, hey…” George said to Matt, face falling with recognition.

“You fucks ganked us and camped us,” Dirk said. “That’s what’s fucking up.”

“Come on, guys,” Cathleen tried to diffuse. “It was just a little PvP.”

“Gankers,” came another whisper.

“It’s not just anything,” insisted Dirk.

“Hey!” The large man with the mummy bandages muscled through the crowd. “You’re the gankers,” he accused.

Wiggles squeaked.

Brett made a Pikachu face while the hulking man towered over him.

“You best watch yourself,” the bodybuilder said. He leaned in close to Brett and drilled his fist into his hand in demonstration. Then he straightened and stomped away.

“What he said,” Dirk grumbled.

More “It’s them!” and “Gankers!” floated through the crowd.

“I think we should be getting out of here,” said Cathleen. “There are rooms in the back you can overnight in. Find us tomorrow, Matt, if this one has cooled off. I can show you how to make a party and stuff.”

The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.

Matt clenched his jaw and did not respond. He couldn’t find the words. He didn’t know how. What the hell just happened?

“Right, well, see ya then,” said Cathleen. She turned and started making her way to the large double doors. Her group followed behind her.

“Hold on,” called Fallyn. “Maria, do you know someone named Manuele?”

Matt could swear Maria hesitated. She didn’t turn around. She didn’t respond. And then her red Snuggie was disappearing through the doors behind Cathleen.

Matt’s mind reeled. It did Olympic gymnastics until it made itself dizzy. Brett was here. George was here. And maybe that was Maria? Am I sure this isn’t a dream? It sure is feeling like a fucking nightmare.

“Wu we-wu,” said Wiggles.

“Yeah…” responded Val and stroked his head.

“We gotta do something about those clowns,” Dirk grumbled.

Kurtis stood, very quiet at Matt’s side, tail in hand. Fallyn tucked brown waves behind one ear.

“We could follow them out tomorrow,” Sofia suggested. “I can’t stealth, so I’ll stay at a distance. Like how we approached these guys.”

“Matt, do you know their classes?” Dirk asked.

Matt stared back blankly for a moment. “Uh. Wait. What?”

“Their classes.”

“Uh,” Matt said, “I’m not super comfortable with this plan.”

“It’ll be fine,” Sofia assured. “You guys didn’t see us coming, and that was four on two. Now we’ll have the advantage.”

“No.” Matt managed to find the words, “I mean, going after them.”

“What the fuck, man. You’re on their side?” Dirk accused.

“No, that’s not what I’m saying,” Matt defended. “If we do this, we’re, we…”

“Why let them rob you of more time?” Fallyn said.

Dirk huffed. “Let’s find those bedrooms or tents or whatever. Talk there.”

###

Sleep did little to diffuse the situation—or whatever it was that Matt now did every night. They found a room that reminded him of the guest quarters in Murl’s castle, but with white stone walls and a mattress large enough for all of them. He shut his eyes when the conversation was clearly going in circles and then, a moment later, it was the next day.

“Okay, Chuckles, are you with us?” Dirk demanded. Matt could feel his stare from beneath that hood. The conversation had just gone around and around and, here it was, going again.

“I don’t know that we—” Kurtis began.

“I asked Matt,” Dirk interrupted. He was almost vibrating. The man was tense like a spring stretched to its limit, about to either fire or snap in two.

Matt let out a long breath. He wanted Brett to get what he deserved, but he wasn’t sure anyone deserved that gray place. And how much time would it cost them? Who would it make him, if he started ganking too? “I don’t think I want to get caught up in all that,” Matt said slowly.

“So you’re siding with them,” Dirk seethed.

“It’s not like that,” Matt said.

Dirk hissed. Matt could feel the resentment.

“Come on Dirk,” Sofia said quietly. “We’ll be fine. Thanks for the group guys.” She pressed her lips into a halfhearted smile. “How do we leave it?”

“Say ‘leave party,’” Kurtis said. Then, “Crap.”

Matt’s party interface shrunk by one box. He was getting so used to it being there, that he almost didn’t see it unless there was a drastic change.

“Leave party,” said Sofia.

“Leave party,” grumbled Dirk.

Their boxes disappeared too.

“Stay safe out there,” Sofia said, standing and walking to the door. She had to push aside the pillows that Wiggles had dammed against the entryway. She opened the wooden door and lingered, fingers curled around the frame.

“Thanks,” Matt said.

“You too,” said Fallyn.

“Wave wiggles,” Val told the beaver. She mimed an example and Wiggles just stood on his hind legs and stared. Then she grabbed his tiny hand and held it up into a wave.

“Bye Wiggles,” Sofia said with a smile.

Dirk grunted and marched through the door.

Matt needed time to think.

“Can someone invite me back?” Kurtis said. “Please?”

###

Over the next five days, Matt’s group completed quest after quest for the nuns—ever vigilant against gankers. There was no shortage of ‘go fetch firewood,’ or ‘go fetch pebbles,’ or ‘Sister Clarence needs flowers to cheer up Sister Frances.’ And the rumor was that gankers liked to wait just outside the portal.

Matt made a habit of casting Rapid Regeneration before passing through, but on the third day, they got blasted and learned there was nothing they could do. Light burned down his flesh. The arrow slid between his eyes with a sickening “thwunk.” Matt guessed it took an hour and a half to hike back to their corpses. He hated every fucking minute of it.

On day four they saw Sofia and Dirk on a hilltop, maybe 30 feet away. Matt had waved and Sofia had returned it, but Dirk had continued walking. They didn’t see Brett’s group again—at least he thought they didn’t. He was 90% sure that the previous day’s gankers were strangers. He hoped they were strangers.

Matt gritted his teeth thinking about it, as he landed in the abbey hallway the next afternoon. He ranged his shoulders and stretched his neck as the others emerged behind him. He’d been on high alert all day. Sister Etta had sent them on a quest for honey which took them deep into the woods. Matt kept waiting for someone to jump out of the trees and attack them.

No one had. The most eventful part, instead, was the discovery of a person-sized bee in the cabin in those woods. The bee wanted compliments in exchange for her honey. Val came up with the winning ‘bee-utiful’ and then the bee-woman did a little dance and—poof—jars of honey.

Matt’s group strode to the sanctum to find Sister Etta. Fallyn offered him a smile as the group turned into the crowded room.

“We made it!” Val cheered, rushing past with Wiggles.

Sister Etta was at the back near the lacquered double doors.

Kurtis held up both hands and followed after Val.

Matt worked his way through the crowd and went through the motions with the nun. The blur receded just in time for him to glimpse a fading glow.

“Did you just?” Matt said.

“Yup!” Val grinned.

“Me too,” said Kurtis, mirroring her smile. “Level 12.” Then he elbowed Matt’s arm. “You’re next.”

Matt eyed his XP bar and sighed. He had 8% to go. “Is that it?” he asked. There hadn’t been a follow-up quest.

“Got nothin’,” Val said.

“Yeppers,” said Kurtis, scratching under his colander. He was no longer wearing his glasses.

Matt pointed at his own and then gave Kurtis a thumbs up. The cat-man smiled.

“How far is your tower for your class quest?” Fallyn asked.

“Uh…” Matt said, opening his map. “Less than Hazel to Central Park but more than the park to the abbey?”

“We hike tomorrow then,” she said.

“Erwu!” said Wiggles.