After cleaning up their loot and totaling it they had an assorted amount of coinage, a couple of enchanted household items (admittedly rarer than normal enchants, but also cheaper and longer lasting enchants themselves) a torn lineage scroll, assorted jewelry, and a bunch of bronze nails.
Since Micky wasn’t a direct fighter he was given all the loot to carry. If Micky was in a fight and attacked anyway, something had gone terribly wrong, so it wasn’t worth worrying about.
Welp, for a boss fight Jenkins would be proud of it if it wasn’t a bad hual. Of course the group did not plan on doing it again. The fight they just had was outright stupid. They could have easily been killed more then they would have succeeded. It was just the sorta foolish thing that they were trying to train out of them really.
Which is exactly why this was the [Epic] bragworthy thing it was. Of course they knew better then to be the noobs that bragged about their epic boss fight in a bar, but heck, it had a chase scene, a gun fight, a kobold mecha, assuming that’s what the kobold was wearing, and even EXPLOSIONS!
It was time to head back though. That was enough excitement for one excursion, what more could go wrong? Cough, ok the area boss could come around. We know what could go wrong, and what could get worse. We even know the chances, nobody needs to say it… So stop thinking it!
Micky and crew walk back along the path towards the exit, following the path that they had already marked out.
They continued to kill kobolds on the way through the [Crawl] as they made their way back. They would also come across the occasional goblin or slime in this section of the crawl as well. While it was possible for a single monster gang to take over an entire [Crawl] it just wasn’t true for this one.
Micky and crew came across another kobold as it rounded the corner. But it wasn’t just a regular kobold, it was an area boss! The [Area Boss]!
Fuck, was all that went through Micky’s mind on repeat. Micky wanted to run away, but it was too late. Because the other two had run away. And now it was just him and Prin. Which wasn’t good. Worse, Micky had all of his loot on his back. Micky quickly [Accelerate]d himself.
But there was an even bigger problem, the kobold wasn’t going after those two dildos that were running away already. The kobold wasn’t chasing after Squishy, or Micky. It was going for Prin, and it was already going to hit. Micky could see the strike in slow motion.
Which was why he was even more amazed by the fact that the strike was suddenly coming towards him. It was a strike that was coming from the right, and Prin was on his left. So logically it was hard for the giant mace to extend toward him in the natural arc of the swing.
As Micky placed his staff in between himself and the giant crocodile like kobold Micky realized what had happened. He had placed himself between the boss and Prin, knowing she wasn’t prepared for the hit. As the crocobold’s mace went through Micky’s staff Micky realized he wasn’t prepared for it either. The mace slammed into him sending him flying.
Prin looked on in horror as Micky flew past her. Had he liked her, this would be the time he would pronounce his undying love, but Micky just wanted to curse the bitch out for some reason. Not because he hated her, but because he wanted to go out with a smile.
Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.
Before he could finish that though however, a shadow came flying through and smashed into the crocobold with the flat of it’s blade. The gnomish teacher appeared from nowhere and smacked the crocobold away.
The crocobold screeched as it ran away, “No fair! Creepy lady doesn’t let me have any fun! Creepy lady is scary and will never get a boyfriend with her tiny body and no chest! Creepy lady is a forever single! Go get some cats to fill the void of your life!”
The gnomish teacher growled after the boss but didn’t chase it down. She appeared next to Micky and said “Yup, I’ma stealthy bitch! Didn’t expect someone with my giant weapon to be an assassin type class did ya?”
Micky just said “Forever alone!” and went back to his delusions of sub mediocre. Of course, while Micky had blacked out a lot, not this time. Micky still wished he did, but he was still conscious enough to experience all his pain this time.
“Now let me ask you little shit, what did you do wrong?” The gnomish instructor said to Prin.
“I couldn’t protect my charge, I couldn’t run away in time, I couldn’t kill the boss...” Said Prin despairingly.
“And you would be moderately right, right, and wrong. No, it’s that you two didn’t stay with the group. I’ll leave the nearly conscious fucker alone for know, he wouldn’t even understand it right now anyway. But you shoulda stayed with the group and brought the support with you.” Said the little gnome.
The gnomish teacher then rounded one the two other party members of the group who had sheepishly come back when they realized the teacher was right there watching them. “And you two, what did you do wrong?”
“We ran away.” said Gilda not meeting the instructor's eyes.
“No! You left your party! You never leave your party. Running away is fine, even scatterin’ is fine, but you never. ever. leave. your. party. Do you understand me? I swear I will have you kicked out of the guild so fast it’ll decapitate you.” Said the instructor, the two other members of the party just nodded their heads.
“And then there’s the fact that you left the support behind. You never leave the support behind. Especially a healer. You DPS can be replaced, heck even a tank can be replaced with a DPS for a time, but the supports are not something you can just leave. I hate to say that there is a ‘rank’ to your lives, but it’s just the simple truth. You are less important.” She said, by now everybody in the party is looking sheepish. Well everybody but Squishy, but she doesn’t really understand what’s going on aside from the fact that Micky is wounded… again.
“Finally, why the hell does he have all the loot? Did you think you could pass it off on him because he was ‘just’ a support? It’s ok to treat another party member like a porter? Do you know why porters always wear heavy plate, hu? Because they can’t freaking dodge with all that weight on. So that’s why you distribute the loot evenly amongst the party! So that nobody is particularly burdened. Imagine if you're in a boss fight, and they launch an AOE, what you gonna do then? Nothing, because the loot couldn’t dodge and now it’s all burned up! The melee DPS gets a little bit of a reprieve with the loot because they have to dodge more often… But YOU have no excuse missy!” The teacher said as she pointed to the ranged DPS.
“Now I have to go chase down that boss before it hurts somebody, but you all got failing marks, just so you know. Now get that little bastard outa here.” Said the teacher as she ran off.
Prin lifted Micky up in a princess carry, she thought it was only fitting. Or at least she did, until Squishy smacked him out of her hands and tried to carry him itself, with limited success. Prin of course, then Picked up Micky with a sense of easy superiority. Only to have Squishy knock him out of her hands again.
Prin and Squishy stared daggers at each other. They were about to break out into a fight on who would have the honor of rescuing the distressed Micky. Or at least they were until the other party members coughed. “This isn’t really the time and place guys...” Said Htier.
Prin ans Squishy stared a few more daggers at each other. Micky coulda sworn he heard the clink as the daggers knocked into each other or bounced off of the walls and ground… But he might be hallucinating, he wasn’t sure. Either way, it was time to get out of here. Prin took the honors this day. But Squishy swore that it would become strong enough to have hands and opposable thumbs, and then it would show both Micky and Prin the superiority of it’s tentacle ways!