Micky performed his morning routine. Get up, pandiculate, go to the adventurer’s guild. At this rate, he was going to have it down pat even before he went to the training camp. Only, of course his routine cut short there.
When he got to the Adventurer’s guild he found a couple of guys waiting for him just outside. They were in eyesight of the adventurer’s guild but the adventurer’s just outside of the guild just had a watching eye. The group of guys walked up to Micky and surrounded him. This triggered the adventurers but one of them held up a hand for them to wait.
“Is this cuz of that clerk?” Micky said.
“No, this is because you have been messing with clan business!” said a goon, who quickly punched Micky in the gut. Micky took it with the appropriate groans, he was used to this kinda thing.
“Yeah! Don’t think you can just get away with it. You stay out of clan business if you know what’s good for ya.” said another.
“And, thanks for reminding me, stay away from Betty too! I seen you talking to her!” He said and gave Micky a nice shiner.
“And Martha!” said another. Micky was beginning to suspect that this wasn’t so much about clan business.
“And that new chick Prin!” Said another, was this the group of no good losers that couldn’t get a date and picked on the new guy for it? This was the reason why they couldn’t get the date in the first place!
“Dude you’d stick your dick in an orc pussy?” said one.
“It’s an ork not an orc, those shits are ugly as hell. And what can I say? That’s one fine green ass ho! Ya, know?” said the one that warned him away from Prin.
“She’s her own woman, so you don’t stand a chance closetbater.” Said Micky, and winced. This was going to hurt but… He really couldn’t stand having his [Sworn] talked about like a piece of meat by these dorks. Had she been here, he would have already let her honor dual them to the death and be done with it. Unfortunately neither Prin nor Squishy were here at the moment. Which left him to take the fist to the same eye.
“Just stay away from her alright?” Said the closetbater, as Micky went down.
“Haha closetbater, that’s your knew name from now on!” Said one of the other closetbaters.
“And don’t talk to Meril either!” Said the last one as he kicked Micky twice in the stomach after he was down. Then he hurried off as the guildies ran up to him.
“Welcome to the club NewB! Now you know the meaning of the name. Clanners are such bitches but don’t mind them any. They probably came around because they saw you with the girls. The dickless bitches, closetbater’s a good name for em’, cuz they couldn’t work up the nerve to chat with a girl even if they all didn’t hate em’.” Said one of the guildies.
“You couldn’t have said that earlier? Like to their face?” Said Micky. The chick that was helping him up let him go and he flopped on the other guy.
“What did you say to me?” she said.
“I said you couldn’t have said that to their face?” Micky said with [Dead] eyes.
“Bwahahaha, I’m sorry you got me!” She said as she slapped her knee and went back to helping him.
“Nah, every newb has to get a little tenderized. Remind you that it isn’t just monsters you gotta watch out for. Nah the clanners are real dicks but they are all bark and no bite. If they actually did anything the guild would come down on their whole clan, no questions asked. So they use these cheap scare tactics. No, rather the guild would be more then happy if you took the fall, so they had an excuse to decimate their entire clan. So the clans have all their teeth taken out of em.” She said as she laid him down on a bench in the guild.
“Anyways, I’ll be off. Got my own [Monster]s to slay!” She said, and her male companion faithfully joined her.
Micky took some time to get his breath back in him before he went to the counter. No rest for the wicked and all that. Or would it be no rest for the victim? No rest for the working man? Anyways, Micky wasn’t going to get any rest, that was for sure.
When he got to the counter the clerk asked “Ooh, that looks nasty. Did you get that in your last battle?” Micky looked down at her tag on her desk. It read Betty.
“Yup.” Micky replied with absolutely no guilt.
“Oh, you’ll have to tell me all about it over drinks sometime!” She said.
“Yeah, sometime...” Micky said, indefinitely. He had enough woman troubles with Meril. Though both of them were cute and up his alley. Micky just wasn’t sure he wanted to get a girl yet… or here. Afterall what was he supposed to do when he had to go to the city? And how was he supposed to take care of the kids? Nope better just not worry about women yet.
“So, you did good work on your last few culling missions. So we’ve decided to set several aside for you. The clans have botched them up repeatedly and know they’re getting slightly dangerous. So we decided to make this kinda system. Now they are on assigned status.” Said Betty.
“But won’t that get me in trouble with the clans?” Said Micky.
“Nah, the only clans that think these monsters are their own personal farm are the shitty ones we don’t really like dealing with. The ones that actually do their job wouldn’t care, or rather, would be more than happy to foist these kinda jobs off one you guys. As for the others? The guild is just looking for cause, and they know it. So they play nice even out of the public eye. Don’t need to get an investigation to point it at em’. So being in their sights is actually a pretty safe place to be.” She said.
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“Really know?” Micky said sarcastically.
“Oh, don’t let them scare you none. They can’t really hurt you. Though they might give you another shiner.” Said the clerk.
“So you noticed hu?” Said Micky.
“I think the whole guild did, they weren’t exactly discrete. Which is what I mean. Had they gone too far the guild woulda hunted down their clan then and there. Which is why we have this dance. They get to feel superior to all the little ants that make up the anthill that is the guild. All while hiding from its shadow.” Said the clerk.
“So you want these commissions or not?” She said.
“Alright, well at least give me ones in the same area.” He said.
“That’s what I thought.” She said.
----------------------------------------
Micky had thought that his plans were perfect. He had the bear trap all set up. He sprung it. And then it sprung back at him. Prin sweeped his legs out from under him and wrapped him up into a bear hug.
“Ahh.” Micky attempted to hide a groan.
Prin pulled back and looked at him. Then she grabbed at his face and looked at his bruised eye. “What the hell happened to you?” She asked.
“I fell.” Micky said.
“Micky Anderson, don’t you lie to me! Tell me what happened. Did somebody bully you?” asked Prin.
“I got beat up by some clan guys ok?” Micky said.
“No, not ok! From now on your not going to the guild in the mornings!” She said.
“No.” Micky said flatly.
“What do you mean ‘No’?” Prin said.
“I mean ‘No’ I am going to the guild in the morning. Unless you want shit cleaning duty again.” Said Micky.
“Ahh, fuck. You saying I have to get up aren’t you?” Said Prin.
“No I am not. I tried that once remember? I’ll be fine. They can’t really hurt me, apparently.” Micky said, sounding weak at the end their.
“You might not be but my [Oath] at least is, you prick.” Said Prin, ending in a groan.
“You don’t have to be honest. Hell, being seen with you is part of the problem, I think.” Said Micky.
“What some Ork haters out there?” Said Prin.
“Nah, seemed to be more of an admirer. You ever thought of dating a clanner?” Said Micky.
“What? Those dickless windbags? As if I could get an orgasim by having somebody blow hot air up my ass. No, I’m not going near those windbags with a ten foot cock.” Said Prin, Micky winced at the imagery.
“No, I’m going, and you’re not going without me, am I clear?” Said Prin.
“Yes.” Said Micky.
“Now, what have we got for missions today?”
Table: ID
Name:
‘Micky’ Anderson
Class:
Pink Mage
LVL 12 [Consolidating]
EXP:
7642/6407397
[Consolidating] 9611096
Table: State
Body:
Weak
[Consolidating] Weak
Mind:
Lesser
[Consolidating] Lesser
Soul:
Moderate
[Consolidating] Moderate
Table: Physiology
Physiology:
Human
Pale, Green eye, Red Hair
Face: Angular
Build: Light, Ganguly
State: Bruised, Tired
Height 1.6m
Waist .59
BMI 18
Table: Stats
Stats
STR 10 [Consolidating] 11
INT 23 [Consolidating] 25
WIS 33 [Consolidating] 36
DEX 12
PER 12 [Consolidating] 13
END 11
WIL 27 [Consolidating] 29
AGL 11 [Consolidating] 12
Table: Skills
Spell and Ability:
Charm
Enrage
Hybrid Bonding +-
Passive: Party Baby
Accelerate
Table: Title
Achievements:
Title: Spell Student
Table: Domain
Deeds:
Pep’s Dungeon
Table: Proficiency
Proficiency:
Class Weapon: 1.14
Improvised Spell: 3.74
Spell Cast: 2.42
Cooking: 5.73
Fishing: 4.17
Exploration: 1.20
Survival: .91
Chores [House]: 2.48
Hunting: 4.50
Repair: 1.23
Whittling: 2.56
Dual Channeling: .75
Dual Casting: .32
Spotting: .29
Camping: .33
Traveling: .03
Botany: .02
Gathering: .37
Drawing: .01
Drinking: .10
Table: Pools
Vitality:
97%
Energy:
Mana: 125 /257
Stam: 73%