A lone skeleton dressed smartly in black mindlessly chewed some sort of nut. To be specific, he wasn’t gnawing on the seed of the nut, but the entire nut itself. Perhaps it was out of boredom as this poor skeleton was stuck in Gravia’s highest maximum prison, or it could’ve also been his favorite pastime to chew things. The lich threw the battered nut onto the floor and sighed, “Decades of being one of the four Godfathers of the city, and this is what I am degraded to…”

A face suddenly slammed against the cell bars and whispered, “You know chewing the shells is bad for your teeth, right?”

“GAAAH! A GHOOOOSTTTT!” the lich godfather screamed.

“You’re a lich so why are you afraid of ghosts?!” the mysterious figure retorted.

“W-Wait… I know you. You’re that robed person that was let out by the Head Commissioner!”

The person the lich godfather was talking to was obviously me. I grabbed against the cell bars and nodded my head. “Yeah. Now I’m here, but for another reason.”

“As I thought, you’re not just some ordinary tourist…” the lich muttered.

“Indeed. I am an Archtourist! No, wait. I… uh… I thought you were saying something else. Never mind that. Anyway, I’m here for you.”

“Me? Are you going to free me?”

I shook my head in response.

“T-Then! You’re here to whack me!”

“Why is it just flight or fight? I’m here to ask you questions,” I explained.

“Interrogation?! You won’t get answers from me! I know you’re trespassing so I’ll scream for the guards to come!” the lich threatened.

“Oh yeah?! I’ll scream harder so they won’t hear your screams!” I argued.

The lich scratched his head with a baffled expression. “I… I’m not sure how that will work, but I think I won’t scream…”

“Good answer.” I nodded then continued, “Now, answer me. Tell me the location of at least one Godfather.”

“What? You’re serious?” the lich asked with an open palm pointed towards me.

“Yes.”

“Look, nobody knows where any of the Godfathers are at, but even if I did know, I don’t even know what I’ll get out of it.”

“I know the location of one Godfather, though,” I said.

“What?! Where?!” the lich asked with such shock that he sat upright.

I pointed at him and answered, “Right there.”

The lich spat, or pretended to spit, at the floor then shook his arm. “Bah. Bastard. Leave me alone.”

“So you have no idea where the other Godfathers are at?”

“Why should I tell you?” the lich hissed.

I wrapped my arms around the cells and casually said, “Come on, buddy. You and I are both the same. We’re both pursuers of greater knowledge.”

“So what?” the lich sighed.

“As you may or may not know, I’m an Archlich. The one that stands apex on the hierarchy of the undead.” I shrugged.

“What? Impossible! There’s no such thing!”

I lowered my head and started permeating thick essence of death. The oozing stench of death started crawling out from my very being, clutching its deathly hands onto the surroundings. The clean floors started to break apart and be filled with black gunk, and maggots started to spring from seemingly nowhere.

“This is the true power of undeath…” the lich gulped as he stared directly at me.

I held my hand out towards him, flowers blooming at my hand only to wither into dust within microseconds. “I offer—and require—knowledge.”

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

“The hierarchy-... it has no power-.... I…”

“The hierarchy matters not, yes. I understand that fully. But even without our base instinct, you understand raw power, do you not?” I said as my iron mask started to rust until it became ghastly gray and sickening orange.

“I understand! I’ll give you as much information!” the lich begged.

“Good!” My tone flipped a full 180 degrees. The seemingly encroaching darkness disappeared, the maggots vanished away without a trace, and the floors returned to normal. It was as if nothing happened at all. “I’ll teach you some interesting baking recipes!”

“But I thought that I would get knowledge to greater power…”

“Baking better things is a gateway to greater power. Now, listen closely…”

*

*

*

I walked down the prison hall with a lot of things in my mind. There were so many things to check, prepare, and flip around! Even though I didn’t get the exact location of another Godfather, I got some good information nevertheless.

“You didn’t really have to do that, you know?” a pigheaded figure in a nice blue suit, the one and only High Commissioner, muttered.

“Do what?”

“Copy my ancient look… bleh,” High Commissioner pretended to vomit.

“I wouldn’t know what you mean, you silly pighead!” I shrugged innocently.

“You! You only needed to exude pressure against the lich in order to show your true strength! You didn’t need to gunk up the floors, spawn maggots out of nowhere, and make those weird effects!” High Commissioner retorted.

“Bah, nonsense! It looked cooler that way!” I said.

“I can’t believe I lost the title God of Death to someone like you!” High Commissioner groaned.

“Not to worry, ol’ buddy! I won’t steal the position of High Commissioner from you! But I would indeed steal the position of the person handing you your paycheck!” I boasted.

“Listen, are you really sure catching one of the Godfathers will give you support from city enforcers?” High Commissioner asked doubtfully.

“Yes. It works out for everyone, right? You get one Godfather down, I get a few votes closer to becoming president, and the City Enforcers’ Don would stop ignoring your invitations to golfing,” I said.

“I can’t believe we’re finally uprooting the criminal underground just because an Archlich wants to become a president…” High Commissioner sighed while massaging his forehead. “Say, why do you even want to become the president?”

“Ugh… I want to… lead the future horizons of tomorrow!” I exclaimed.

“That doesn’t make sense, I think you mashed a bunch of generic lines together and made an abomination,” High Commissioner pointed out.

“That doesn’t matter. My goals are beyond your mortal comprehension,” I answered smugly with my chin up.

“I was a former god, you know.”

“Then my goals are beyond your formerly-divine comprehension!”

“You know what, just leave and get working,. Just don’t cause too much trouble, and I’ll cover for you,” High Commissioner shooed me away after throwing me out of the prison entrance.

With my plans formulated, I quickly returned to my HQ and got my task forces moving. Time was crucial so I even brought Kendra out to hunt the secret bases with me. While most hideouts were useless, some hideouts had some clues as to where the Godfather of this particular crime family hid.

“It seems that these people are undead ooze,” Kendra classified as she tried to resurrect some of the dead criminals back up in vain. Just as she had pointed out, most of the members were either undead abominations or oozes, which made it hard to raid their hideouts sometimes.

“Damn! They’ve melted the evidence again!” I yelled as I opened a box of sizzling papers. I tried to save as much evidence as I could, but the leader of this hideout had managed to remove most of the incriminating evidence.

“Buwahaha! You won’t catch us, law enforcer! I don’t know who snitched on us, but you won’t catch our Godfather!” the ooze I captured mocked. He was frozen in place with ice magic, and there were several arcane ropes tying him in place.

Kendra placed her hands around her hips and stared at the undead ooze with a frown. “How do undead oozes work anyway? Are oozes even living in the first place?”

“Huh, I never thought about that. I just assumed all oozes were… just that,” I muttered as I threw away the box of melted evidence.

“Hey! There’s a clear distinction between living oozes and undead oozes! I’ll have you know-”

I pushed the ooze on his side, causing him to shatter into many pieces. Just to be sure, my arcane ropes also burned through whatever remained of the green sludge. “We’re done here. Let’s move on to the next hideout, unless you need a break.”

Kendra sighed and looked away in disappointment. “What am I even doing here? Why do you even need me for your stupid election?”

“What? You don’t like being here?” I asked as I picked up a piece of nut from a bowl. I bit into the shell then realized that it gave me an interesting sensation so I bit into the nut a few more times until I got tired.

My little apprentice waved her hand in denial before taking a seat. “No, I’m wondering why you dragged me all the way to the heartland of Gravia. I’m thinking there’s some sort of reason.”

“Does everything I do seem like a lesson to you?”

The room was silent for a moment as Kendra was unable to discern an answer. She couldn’t even study me as I was covered from head to toe in cloth or metal. Even then, as a skeleton, she wouldn’t be able to get any notable expressions. After much deliberation, Kendra answered, “Yes and no. I’m starting to understand your thinking… a bit.”

“I’d rather you don’t study me,” I retorted.

“Still, why Gravia?”

“Gravia’s the melting pot of many, many things. Dead or alive. Humanoid or plantoid. Ethereal or tangible. You have much to learn from this place.”

“I see.” Kendra sighed then got up. “Alright, I’m done. Let’s go, Master!”