“Argh!” The Duke’s daughter, Aera, groaned as she hit the floor. She slowly got up, using her training sword as a stand.

“A...again! One more try!” She cried out at me.

“Wait? Are you serious? Maybe you should try not shouting your moves before you use them on your enemy?” I scratched my head with my training sword.

“But….but….my teacher used to do it and he was a master swordsman!” Aera shouted as she prepped herself up and took a stance to attack me.

“And where is this so-called master swordsman?” I asked.

“...He died in a duel.”

“Well. Not so much for a master is he now?” I shrugged. She angrily charged at me and started swinging at me. I casually dodged them by quick, simple sidesteps and I swung my sword once. With her training sword knocked out of her hands, she fell on her knees.

“Aaah…” She sighed.

“Look, kid. For what it’s worth, at least move your arm like this and…” I started giving her a few tips. If she looked depressed every time we do training, people would probably try to lynch me for not doing my job of actually teaching. Well, actually, I felt like people had been trying to lynch me lately…

I quickly looked over my shoulders and I saw two nobles scurry away from the courtyard. Was that just coincidence….or…? Ah well.

Recently, I had been doing nothing but charge the hero summoning scroll while I lazed around at the royal palace. The heroes had bothered me from time to time but nothing too important for me to take note.

I felt a vibration at my pocket and took out a scroll. It was the summoning scroll and it seemed that it was ready to be used again. Finally! I was getting sick of pretending to teach. I excused myself and quickly made my way to the divination room, deep inside the castle. There, I saw the angel Clouds was waiting for me again.

We once again attempted to summon a hero. I hoped it wouldn’t summon that thing again. One could only hope. The circle of light once again appeared and the same fat boy came out. So much for hope…

“AHEM...ONCE AGAIN...I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED INTO THIS WORLD AS A HERO! WHERE IS MY PRINCESS?! IS IT YOU?!” He pointed at me.

“NO!”

“IS IT YOU?!” He pointed at Clouds. I stood in front of her to protect her from the monster.

“Back off, she isn’t your princess,” I threatened.

“Yo..your lordship! Th...this is...” She nervously covered her face. The poor thing was scared! Or at least she was! How dare this thing scared this angeling!

“Look here, tubby. I summoned you here because I’m desperate..”

“Of course, you are desperate! A demon king is on the rampage and all the ladies needs saving! Only this most handsome and honorable man would do” He placed his hand on his face then stretched his arm out, looking like an idiot.

“What? Eugh. Whatever. Look, here’s the deal. I want you to replace me as the heroes’ teachers. I will teach you the bare minimum and you would in turn, teach the heroes,” I explained.

“What? The heroes are already gathered?” He asked me while scratching his side. He pushed his glasses up then pressed his hand against his chin.

“So, you’re saying you wish for me to tutor the heroes because I am obviously more hero-like than them?” He inquired.

“Yes. Totally.” I gave him a thumbs up.

“VERY WELL! It was as if it was divined by all the Gods and Goddesses of this magical world! I WILL TRAIN THE HEROES! But first, you shall teach me! Go on, teach me ‘The Divine Fire Dragon Swirling City-Destroying Ray’!”

“What the hell are you saying?! Ah, first, let’s get your divination.” I pushed him out of the room.

“What? Divination? A beautiful woman with bare minimum clothing will tell me to ‘save the world’, isn’t that right? Wouldn’t that woman qualify?!” He pointed at Clouds but I ignored him while pulling him out of the room. Once we were out, I kicked him back into the room.

“What the?! Where’s that beautiful woman?! Why is this place different?!” He complained.

“Shut it, you freak!” I closed the door on him and waited for his divination to end. It only took a few seconds because the door slammed open.

“AAAAAAAH! There was no beautiful Goddess wearing only robes! There was only a shitty cloud telling me some things I didn’t understand!” He cried. I was getting a headache just listening to him.

“Yeah, yeah, you freak. I’ll introduce you to the heroes’ party.” I started walking back to the main courtyard where the heroes were training.

“Don’t call me freak! I have a name! I am the Dark Prince of the Atlantean Space 12th Empire, Rokusukuzawa....”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying so can you just shorten it?” I grumbled at him.

“Hmpf. You can call me, ‘Vakasa of the Darkness’, then!” He proudly showed his chest...more like his belly...out as he called out his name.

“Alright, your name is Lard, then. Pleased to meet you.” I opened the door towards the main corridor and just sighed as this guy was tiring me more than fighting multiple demon lords at once. That was saying something since I actually did that once.

“Lard?! Kuuh…...You….Grr!” He pulled out his wooden sword and attacked me. It broke immediately.

“MY KATANA! NOOOOO! Pay for it! No, wait, MAKE ME ANOTHER ONE!” He cried.

“What the hell is a ‘Kah-Tay-Neh’? Go annoy the king for equipment! I’m not giving a bum like you anything!” I brushed him off.

“Hmpf! You don’t know? A katana is the best…”

“Yeah, yeah, Lard. Quiet! Let me introduce you to the heroes.” I opened the door to the courtyard and saw the heroes training. Blackhair was training with the duke’s daughter Aera, the blue-haired priestess was meditating in the corner and Arrowsky was shooting at some target practice.

“And who is that weird looking serf supposed to be?” Aera walked up to us as she asked.

“FUH! I AM THE DARK PRI…”

“Call him Lard,” I introduced Lard the Hero to the heroes.

“It fits him.” Aera snickered while giving him a smug look. For once, she and I had something to agree about.

“You...you big-breasted blondie! I am chosen by this man to succeed him as your tutor!” He prolcaimed.

“W...WHAT?! YOU LECHER!” She slapped him so hard he actually kissed the ground. Siiiigh, was this worth it? I turned my sight to the corner and I saw Duke Lancel approaching me.

“My friend, I’d like to remind you that there would be a party in a few weeks and I hope that you would be prepared by the myriad of visitors who wanted to see the teacher of the heroes,” The Duke reminded me. Apparently, in a few weeks there would be a huge festival dedicated to the founding of the kingdom, aptly named ‘Founding Day’. Sadly, that would mean nobles from all corners of the nation would come and pay the king a visit. That would also include paying the heroes a visit, being important figures in the future, after all.

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“And who is this strange young man?” Duke Lancel pointed at the fatass lying face down next to me.

“I AM THE DARK PRINCE OF-...”

“Just call him, Lard, father.” Aera interrupted Lard’s introduction. Apparently Lard was quick to getting up whenever he felt like he needed to pollute the world with his nonsense.

“Eh...Lard? Interesting names people give to themselves nowadays.” The Duke scratched his chin confused.

“No, no. I AM THE DARK-...”

“Anyways, old man, there should be more reason as to why you’re here,” I pointed out to the Duke.

“Yes, quite the insight you have. As expected of the teacher of the heroes party. The king actually want to give you a task. No, not you. The heroes’ party.” The Duke took out a piece of paper and gave it to me. I pretended to read it but I couldn’t. I gave it to the heroes who were gathering around me since they heard that this was a task for them.

“Hmm? A recently discovered tomb?” Blackhair asked as he looked at the paper.

“Yes. Apparently a few hunters discovered a path to a tomb in the outskirts of the capital region which they believe could be haunted by the undead. Recently, there had been an increasing number of undead waking up. This had put holy orders especially from Aon on full time work,” The Duke explained.

“Why couldn’t the army clear it?” I asked. I didn’t really want to go out and fight. Why couldn’t I just sit around?

“There had been some...problems recently. Something about criminal gang wars occurring on all over the nation. We think it was caused by the Bloody Rags criminal group. As a result, many of the troops had been dispatched to resolve the issue with the gang wars. Not to mention we had to guard our borders from the demons. I had heard that they started a massive invasion on the southern border countries,” He answered.

“Teacher, we should go! This could be a good chance for Leyna to train her holy spells, too.” Blackhair suggested. What the hell was a Leyna? I stared at the heroes’ party for a second before remembering that was the blue-haired priestess.

“Ugh. How good is your holy magic again?” I asked Leyna.

“I’m good with banishing the undead, your Holiness!” She saluted me. Huh? Weirdo.

Well, to be honest, I could just kick them into the tomb and wait for them to come out. It could be part of training and it wouldn’t cost me much effort. No, wait! There could be interesting things inside! I could also turn it into a tour site for my companions.

“Very well. We’ll take the task.” I nodded.

“That’s good to hear. I will have to head back to my castle at Mierra. It seems that trouble was brewing up from there the most. I will inform the king before you set off.” The Duke waved us goodbye and left. He also said some family related things to her daughter before leaving. It went something like ‘Go find a person to marry, you’re still young!’ or something.

“I...I have someone I like, you idiot!” She shouted back at her father as he laughed away.

“Well, well, congratulations, Lard. You get to have training earlier than I would’ve planned.” I turned to Lard then rubbed my hands together.

“W...why are you doing that? Only villains do that!” He pointed out.

“Nothing!” Oh, if only you could see my smile!

.

.

.

“Ugh...do I really have to do this?!” Lard shouted. He was carrying a lot of gear as we made our way to the tomb. Excellent, the first thing we would do was to burn off all your fat. I made him wear armor, carry at least 5 different weapons and a bag of supplies.

“Yes. It’s because it was said that only the most hero-like hero of all heroes could do this much. As you can see, we’re not quite hero-like. Not at your level,” I told him.

“I see! LET’S KEEP GOING!” He ran...for 6 steps before falling.

“How about we rest here?” Blackhair suggested and the group agreed in unison. We were at a forest by the outskirts of the capital. A few hunters guided us but were too afraid to lead us any further down so we had to find the rest of the way ourselves.

“So. You look very young. Where are you parents?” I asked the mage of the group, Kendra, as I helped her set up a tent.

“I’m an orphan.”

“Oh….oooooh…..” I stopped what I was doing and paused.

“Don’t worry. They weren’t murdered, I hope. I just didn’t know who my parents were. At a very young age, a mage took me in and looked after me.” She waved her hand, trying to dismiss any of my horrible thoughts like she was kidnapped at a very early age or something similar.

“This mage. Is he or she still alive?” I asked.

“Yes! She’s actually the one who introduced me to the king to become a member of the heroes’ party. But right now, she was probably in the Sorceror City States.” She went back to fixing the tent up.

“Sorcerer City States?” I asked.

“Hmm? You haven’t heard of it? It’s somewhere...north-west of Angolia? Somewhere around there. It’s a bunch of city states headed by mages. Sometimes they work together, sometimes they hate each other.” She shrugged as she finished setting up the tent. That sounded like an interesting place. I should go there some other time with my group.

“You!” Lard came up to me looking angry.

“What is it this time? I didn’t eat all your sweet rolls.” I sat down as I tried to dismiss him away.

“No! It’s not that...wait, there’s sweet rolls? Where?! No...Wait. Ahem….I, VAKASA OF THE DARKNESS, WISHES TO LEARN MAGIC!” He placed a hand on his face and did some weird pose. It looked like a peacock trying to do a mating dance or something alike.

arc3illu4 [http://i.imgur.com/p6R0gD2.jpg]

“Hmm? Seriously, where did you find this guy?” Kendra turned to me with a confused face.

“I, VAKASA OF THE DARKNESS, DARK PR-”

“Found him in the castle basement,” I interrupted.

“You...what? Nevermind. I don’t want to know.” Kendra shook her head slowly.

“So, you wish to delve in the art of mana and arcane, tubby?” I stood up, fixing myself up.

“Of course. Why should I, the hero who would vanquish all evil from this land, go on without having a super awesome spell to destroy my foes with? I would start with the weakest and eventually use my ULTIMATE move!” He did weird arm movements as he explained.

“Fine, fine. Whatever, it’ll be hilarious watching you fail anyway.” I started walking away, leading Lard to another clearing in the forest.

“Wait, teacher! Can I come? I could learn a bit more just by listening.” Kendra ran next to me.

“But I’ll just be teaching the basic of the basic,” I said.

“Well, basics are important to revise from time to time...” Kendra answered back. Well, to be honest, I haven’t taught Kendra much about magic since I became her teacher. Perhaps I could give her a tip or two. When we got to a clearing, I had my two students stand in front of me.

“So, you don’t know magic or whatever is it fully?” I asked Lard.

“No! Of course I know what magic is! I have played hundreds of magic related gam-”

“Ok, ok. Stop. You’re giving me a headache. I’ll just assume you are as stupid as you look.” I massaged my temples.

“So, for now, we’ll begin with the basics. Surrounding us are mana in the air. They’re present almost every element,” I started to explain. Kendra was eagerly listening to my every word. She used to think I was some kind of devoted religious nutjob but realized that I was a devoted science nutjob.

I told Lard the basics of magic in a nutshell and demonstrated how he could at least use some form of magic. I didn’t want to give a lecture on how magic works just like how Ts...Too...Tsu...Ugh...Rookie used to give us lectures on magic.

I held my hand out and used one finger to make rotating movements like I was making circles in the air.

I gathered mana in the air and started colliding them together to form a lot of friction. Soon a fire combusted and I allowed it to grow bigger. A thousand years ago, I would’ve thought this was impossible since it goes beyond the laws of physics, but then again a thousand years ago, I didn’t know what physics was. Being immortal had perks.

“Oooooh!” Lard was obviously impressed but Kendra was much more impressed.

“You could do that without chanting?!” She pointed at my slowly growing fireball.

“Yeah. If you know science, you don’t have to. Creative imagination is just a weak form of replacement for understanding.” I shrugged and stopped my hand when the fireball was big enough. It was just the size of a fist, but it should be enough for demonstration.

I used my finger to point at a boulder and the fireball flew towards it. Upon collision, the fireball exploded and the boulder was slightly damaged.

“Oh! Oh! I know science! Could I make a nuclear explosion spell?!” Lard started becoming more excited.

“Huh? What? Nuc-what?” I looked at him like he was insane as usual.

“NUC-LEAR EX-PLOOO-SION!” For every syllable, he made a different pose. I used one of my finger to massage my head.

“What on the Goddess’ name is that supposed to be even?” Was I having problem with understanding Commons again? Wait, how the hell was he even speaking Commons so fluently? I would have to look upon this more later.

“It’s when you rapidly release energy from INTENSE NUCLEAR REACTION. The explosion would be so big that it would be enough to WIPE OUT AN ENTIRE REGION!” He raised his arms like he was praising the sky or sun. That sounded insane, but I didn’t answer him. That actually sounded….very interesting. I cannot dismiss that there was a chance I could do that...maybe. Very interesting.

“Hmm..whatever. For now just do what I just did.” If I had a face, I would have a grin so big, it would stretch across my face.