Chapter 15 - Lady Brynn, Smallest Finger of the Shadowed Glove

Winnifred had promised to send me a message while Truck-chan was approaching our house. When the expected courier arrives, my preparations are complete.

My plan is perfect. Normally, Utherick sleeps in the temple. But, I made sure to invite him to our country mansion for a discussion about our family finances. This is a tedious topic, but it scares off Evie, while simultaneously summoning Utherick with his unreasonable measure of responsibility.

After supper, my brother retires to his room for the evening. He’s probably reading some holy book right now. On the other hand, Evie has been conveniently “scheduled” for a date with Guildsmaster Ripworth in town. She’ll be miles away when it matters and furious when she learns she missed the fun!

When she “accidentally” told me about her assignation with Ripworth, I had faked a giant tantrum in my room. By destroying several mirrors and upending furniture, I played the part of a jilted lover. To her, this would further solidify our supposed rivalry. I imagine she would come home bearing some token of Ripworth’s affection.

Did I care? Only superficially.

Naturally, I’d known for years about her active spying role for the legions. It was quite amusing. Her foolish subterfuge just made my job easier! While she spied on everyone else, I would collect intelligence from her. I am the older sister after all! In the end, anything she has is mine by right.

Even better than that, it was so much fun feeding her information! She thought she was so clever, but I only let her see what I wanted her to see. Someday, she might figure me out. Clearly, she was already getting suspicious. Before then, I’d have to turn her. A double-agent is useful in its own ways. Less exciting, but still useful.

Although Utherick is unaware of the coming encounter, my information allows me to take every needed precaution. For once, I decide upon a demure green dress. That alone should tell him how serious I am about the current state of our house. After all, if I’m dressing up nice, it will shake his preconceptions.

When the butler announces that we have a guest, I ask him to bring my brother to the veranda. Utherick, as the head of the family, cannot really refuse. The location is important, because we wouldn’t want Truck-chan tearing up our fine carpet!

Since I am ready and waiting, I arrive first. Truck-chan is chaperoned by Winnifred, who serves as both her teacher and mine. Tonight, Winnifred is wearing a berserker’s outfit, complete with bear skins, cat claws to match her ears, and a wolf fang necklace. In contrast, Truck-chan is wearing a formal dress with extra lace, but the same earrings that were gifted to her by the king. It fits tightly against her chassis, showing off her best curves.

Utherick’s arrival comes as expected. He’s had days to rehearse his speech, so I’m hoping to see something to remember. In fact, I have hidden a scribe behind a nearby statue to record his exact words. There’s no better blackmail than the truth!

“Dear brother, would you take tea with me and our guests?”

“Of course. I did not know they were coming. What is the occasion?”

As the host, I give my prepared answer, “Truck-chan has only just arrived back from the front. As you see, Guildmistress Winnifred is still wearing her battle garb.”

He does not even glance at Winnifred. On top of that, I can see that he is quite perturbed. His eyes are dilated. His hands tremble. His skin is pallid and I can see a sheen of damp sweat.

“Dear brother, you should not loom over us womenfolk. Please have a seat!”

“Of course. Yes. You are right.” He slides into the only empty seat. As planned, this is the one next to me, across from Winnifred, and right next to Truck-chan. In fact, my own seat is intentionally askew, forcing his chair even closer to the golem. His knees nearly bump against her hood as he squeezes by.

The butler and our maids pour our tea without speaking then retire out of earshot. The implication, completely false, is that we are alone and unobserved.

I look toward my brother, but I can see him floundering. I told him to be ready, but I suppose his heart just can’t handle the stress. One would think that he’s never even considered the idea of romance before. On that other hand, he seems too bothered by the situation given that Truck-chan is a… truck.

Wait! Is he taking this seriously? Does he actually see her as a viable romantic partner? Does he think that she might even approve his offer?

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

With fresh eyes, I observe the situation. Winnifred apparently clues in to his reactions not long after myself. She sends me a double-wink and a small sign with her thumb. From my knowledge of our guild’s secret signals, I recognize she’s asking for me to move him along.

It’s simple to understand her reasoning, but I cannot think of any method to do so. Utherick is frozen in fear. How to thaw him out while still accomplishing our goal?

I should give him time to collect his bearings. To do this, I start up an idle conversation with Winnifred. “How is the front?”

“Ah, ye know. Same old. Same old.”

“Slow but steady progress?”

“Yep, ye hit it right on the nose!”

“Are you glad to be back home?”

“Ye betcha. Oh, speakin’ of that, there’s this new chef in town! He was invitin’ me to try out his new joint. Sounds real elegant-like and nifty. Ye should go!”

“That does sound interesting. What does he serve?”

“Dunno. Haven’t been meself. But, I knew him from before. Had me a smidgin of his cheesecake once when I was helpin’ out Truck-chan out on the front.”

“It was good?”

“Suppose so. Though, I was eatin’ it usin’ a goblin fork.”

“Eww! Is that sterile?”

She shrugs, “I’m not ailin’ from goblin stink. Sides, I wasn’t usin’ no spoon!”

“You could have just waited.”

“No happenin'! Cheesecake like that’s a treasure! A rarity! Worth more than gold!”

“I’ll have to look into it then.”

“Yep, ye do that! Figurin’ that chef… someone’s snappin’ him up soon.”

I smile, “Maybe I’ll snap him up myself. Our family could use a new cook.”

Normally, that would get a response from my brother. After all, hiring and firing staff is his responsibility. However, he still hasn’t moved. I’ll need to give him a push.

“Dear brother. You haven’t touched your tea yet. Is something the matter?”

“Ah, yes… err, no. Nothing is wrong.” His statement is belied by the tea spilling from his cup onto his pants.

“Oh dear!” While I motion across the way to the butler for help, I curse at my fate. Will his own nervousness upset our plan?

“No, this is nothing.” He waves the butler away. “I can get new pants later. But, I must say something right now!”

“Oh, my!” I blurt out. I’ve never seen him like this before. It’s almost as if the years he’s spent as a boring religious addict have been replaced with a sudden bout of virility. If he’d only shown this determination to the various ladies I’d sent his way before, I might already have another ally in the family. Perhaps even an heir to the family name!

As I watch, he takes a knee in front of Truck-chan. “My lady, I regret that my foolish actions may have dishonored your name. There is a rumor in town that we spent the night of the party together - in each other’s umm… company.”

Truck-chan says nothing. Not that I expected her to beep or whatever she does.

“This was not at all my intent! I had hoped to make your acquaintance more slowly, to spend days and months learning about each other’s hearts and desires. But, I see now that you have an honorable soul like myself.”

Wow! That’s some speech! If I had known he was so serious… I could have planned some comic relief.

“My greatest wish is to put these awful rumors to rest. As such, I ask for your hand in marriage.” With that, he pulls out a ring. I’m not quite sure where it’s supposed to go, but it’s pretty big. Did he surreptitiously find out the diameter of her arm-thingies?

With that statement, I thought he was done, but then, he continues. "Truck-chan. From the moment we met, I knew that you were the perfect woman for me. Your form is beautiful, but it does not match my own. As such, if you would marry me, then this would be true love! Pure love! Since we are so different, I would never be tempted by the foul desires of the flesh. Instead, our thoughts could focus on higher ideals! We could live a chaste life unstained by anything but love and respect for one another!"

There is a long pause. All three of us stare at Truck-chan. Normally, she answers any question immediately. Is she considering an answer? Or is she asleep?

“BEEP BEEP BEEP!”

“What does that mean?” I ask Winnifred.

But, it is Utherick who answers, “It’s not a yes, but not a no.”

“What does THAT mean?” I ask Utherick.

“I’m not sure myself. Maybe she wants some time to think about it?”

“BEEP!”

“Ah… hmm.”

“Maybe ye should be courtin’ her a bit! I was just talkin’ about that new chef. Let her get to know ye better,” offers Winnifred.

Utherick dips his head to Truck-chan. “If you are willing? I’m quite sure I can quickly get us reservations.”

“BEEP!”