[ZERO SPACE]

Forty-five Feather Birds filled Chief’s room.

Chief was late for her own assembly. This was bad. Shae had one more day to get that Exotic, and every minute was precious.

Dalli stood by Chief’s throne, towering over Shae with his long legs.

“I need your help Dalli,” said Shae. “This is important.”

“Nothing’s more important than Chief,” said Dalli. “And she needs me more than you do!”

“I’ll owe you one,” said Shae.

“I’m done doing favors for you,” said Dalli. “I just helped that pteranoid get her level two. I’m taking a break from your shenanigans!”

Chief stomped forward. Her incisors expanded and recoiled with loud heavy breaths. Tired wings drummed against her back. She collapsed across her throne, causing a minor earthquake. Her fist slammed against the thone button, muting her manic birds.

Dalli gasped - Chief was doing even worse than he had imagined.

“Feather Birds,” Chief announced. “I have news. Dire news, I mean.”

Shae braced himself. It was obvious what this was about.

“Our healer Chroma is dead,” said Chief.

Chief went AFK. It took several minutes for her to return.

“More importantly, Matt is dead,” said Chief. “Not to say that Chroma’s death is less important. I mean, in some ways it is, but, erm, it is a terrible tragedy, of course. They will both receive beautiful birds in commemoration.”

Chief rose from her throne.

“You all need to stay out,” said Chief. “Of glitch missions, I mean. The Feather Birds simply cannot afford another tragedy like this.”

Chief looked towards the ground.

“And now, a new Raid Captain must be appointed,” Chief said.

Shae had a bad feeling about this.

“Shae,” said Chief. “Please come. Forward, I mean.”

Shae dragged himself to the front of the room. He hated speaking. Especially public speaking.

“You are now our Raid Captain,” said Chief. “Everyone, please do your best. To respect him, I mean. Not that you don’t respect him already, but erm, yes, he is worthy of respect, congratulations Shae.”

Shae crossed his arms.

“I didn’t agree to this,” said Shae.

Chief gave him a blank stare.

“You don’t want this?” Chief asked.

“I’ve got a lot going on right now,” said Shae. “I need time to decide --”

“We’ll discuss this later, Shae,” said Chief. “Be silent.”

Shae shut his mouth. Chief wasn’t having a great day.

“Unfortunately, there is one more thing,” said Chief. “That must be addressed, I mean. Danger Face. Please step forward.”

DangerFace869 strolled over.

“Your actions led to it,” said DangerFace869. “The death of our Raid Captain, I mean. And that is a bannable offense.”

Shae and DangerFace869 both shared the same wide-eyed expression.

“Unfortunately, replays don’t work in glitch missions,” said Chief. “But I reviewed them all. Your conversation logs, I mean. The glitch mission was your choosing.”

Shae gaped. He couldn’t figure out what scared him more - DangerFace869 getting banned, or Chief eavesdropping on their conversations.

“I am sorry to make a public display of this,” said Chief. “But it is critical that the Feather Birds understand. The consequences of their actions, I mean --”

“No!” Shae interrupted.

Chief fell silent.

“Danger Face stays,” said Shae. “I’m Raid Captain. He’s part of my team.”

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“You said you needed time,” said Chief. “To decide, I mean.”

“I didn’t say how much time,” said Shae. “I decided.”

Chief’s wings beat against her back.

“We will discuss this later, Shae,” said Chief. “Now be silent --”

“We’ll discuss it now!” Shae said. “You want me as Raid Captain? That’s my condition.”

Chief’s wings accelerated. Murmurs crept through the crowd.

“I’m the strongest Feather Bird you have,” said Shae. He turned towards the crowd. “Any of you fuckers want to step up and challenge me?”

The room hushed. Not a single fucker stepped up.

“Damn straight,” said Shae. “Danger Face made a mistake, but that’s what it was: a mistake. And it was a bad mistake. But I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again. Because, I’m --”

Shae paused.

“I’m his mentor now,” said Shae.

DangerFace869 formed a slight smirk.

“He’s a liability --” said Chief.

“You want to know what a liability is?” yelled Shae. “Having an idiot like Matt as your Raid Captain. Fuck that guy. I’m glad he’s dead.”

Chief gasped, along with half the room.

“You heard me,” said Shae. “Danger Face picked the mission. But Matt’s the one that said yes.”

The room erupted with chatter. Chief wished she had a button to silence the crowd. Fortunately, a loud stomp of her foot did the trick.

“Enough!” yelled Chief. “Fine Shae. He’s yours. Your responsibility, I mean.”

Chief towered over Shae.

“But if he gets one more person killed, or if you step down as Raid Captain, he’s good,” Chief said. “As good as banned, I mean. Do you understand me?”

Shae nodded. Chief could be scary when she wanted to be.

“Good,” said Chief. “Now get out. All of you, I mean.”

Shae was the first to leave. The rest of the crowd followed, leaving Chief to sulk.

Dalli placed a palm against Chief’s shoulder - she was AFK. If only he could be there for her. Go to her wherever she was in the Haven and give her a relaxing massage.

He studied Chief’s birds; her collection was expansive, yet incomplete. In all of her travels, there were still bird species she hadn’t obtained.

Dalli wanted to do something for Chief. Something special. He didn’t just want to make her day; he wanted to make her year. And a few years after that too. If he desired her favor, and maybe her heart, he would have to go all out.

[THE HAVEN]

Kyle admired a shiny new badge:

Senior Designer

It was only yesterday that Kyle was staring up at Zydan’s ivory tower. Now suddenly, he was the one calling the shots. Or enough shots to make a difference at least. Fixing Zero Space would be an uphill battle, but it was a hill he was ready to die on.

He spun in his chair, auditing his room: plain blue bed sheets, drab gray wallpaper, unpolished wooden flooring - it could use a little pizazz. Interior decorating wasn’t his thing, but with those extra credits coming in, maybe it was time to live a little.

This promotion might finally boost him past floor forty; he would soon be living the high life. All those years of studying, struggling, and kissing Zydan’s ass - they were all paying off.

KNOCK KNOCK

And now it was pizza time!

Kyle paused just before the door. What if it was the dreaded Healer Killer? That didn’t seem likely - Kyle didn’t play a healer. In fact, developers hardly had time to play the game at all. This was verified pizza; he had ordered it.

He opened the door to a man in a red top hat, a perfect red suit, and an impeccable handlebar mustache. This man cradled a red metallic pizza box in his arms - it was the strangest pizza box Kyle had ever seen, held by the strangest pizza man.

“Is that my pizza?” asked Kyle.

“Of course!” said the pizza man.

A metal leg extended from the pizza box’s base, rooting it in the floor. The pizza man turned a crank on the box’s side, playing a delightful music box ditty that dampened the sound of a thousand bullets spraying out the front of it. Kyle exploded into crimson dust, strips of loose flesh, and powdered bone.

The pizza man released the crank, ending his bullet ballet. He flipped open a small red notebook, comparing its pages with what remained of Kyle’s face.

“Well, you look like the right person,” the man said. “That’s a relief!”

The man stepped inside, closing Kyle’s door behind him.

“Try and stay alive a bit longer,” said the man. “We have things to discuss.”

Kyle had other things on his mind. Bullets, mostly.

“They call me Cleaver Craig,” said the man. “My real name’s Craig. Maybe that was obvious.”

The light drained from Kyle’s eyes.

“It’s only fair that you know who sent me,” said Cleaver Craig. “It was your boss, Zydan. Maybe that was obvious too.”

Kyle didn’t respond.

“You still there?” Cleaver Craig asked, snapping his fingers. “Hello?”

No one was home.

“Oh well,” said Cleaver Craig. “I believe the soul exists beyond the body. I don’t mind hanging out with your soul.”

Cleaver Craig stepped over a pool of blood.

“You have a nice place here Kyle,” said Cleaver Craig. “It could use a little more red. Well, I guess it has that now.”

Cleaver Craig lifted Kyle’s Senior Designer badge from the ground.

“Senior Designer?” said Cleaver Craig. “That’s quite an honor. Congratulations!”

Cleaver Craig looted Kyle’s fridge.

“I’m going to need to use your bathroom too,” said Cleaver Craig. “I hope you don’t mind.”

Kyle didn’t seem to mind.

“Well, it was a pleasure meeting you Kyle,” said Cleaver Craig. “Try not to make anyone too angry in the next life!”