JESSIE : LEVEL 13+4

DAY 266 : B-DAY, SECONDWEEK, AGNI, YEAR 2

FULGORA 3 : DOWNPOUR 2 : SHAKEDOWN

So I’ve been walking.

Mostly just that, occasionally broken up by eating and sleeping whenever and wherever I feel like. The sleeping is free. Eating, not so much. And the upcharge for even the simplest of ingredients is just pure extortion. In fact, I refuse to put so much as a single dinero into any of these damn tablets. Not until and unless I absolutely have to.

So it’s a good thing I stuffed all the leftovers and ingredients and deli sandwiches I never got around to eating, right into my inventory for the entire last year. And it’s an EXTREMELY good thing that food stays perfectly preserved while it’s in there. It just doesn’t stay hot. Which, as much as I’d like this meatball marinara to be fresh out the oven, it’s probably also good that it’s not, what with how intolerant Fulgora is about that sort of thing.

Oh, and I signed up for a dungeon slot. So I’ve got that to look forward to in a couple months. I’m just not entirely sure what else I can do until then. Hence the walking.

It’s during one of those preeminent walks that I come across something odd. A mugging. Or what looks like one. A waify girl in a starting poncho is being interrogated by a smaller, slimy-looking guy with a fedora. Meanwhile, what I can only describe as a viking-themed pro wrestler, hefting what looks like an electric double bass over his shoulder, towers over them both, staring domineeringly down at the poor woman.

So I stand about a hundred feet away and psyche myself up to zip over and counter any actual violence at a moment’s notice.

But almost as soon as I do, the smaller of the muggers turns to look right at me. “Well, isn’t this a nice surprise..? Just the bitch we were looking for.”

Well fuck… Catharsis opportunity ruined, I untense.

But then I process what he said and re-tense with a vengeance. “Come the fuck again?”

He seems unimpressed by me or my outrage. “Do you prefer ‘Mrs. Crimson’ then?”

[ HERO TARGETED: DIRTY DEEDS ]

I snort, not even needing the minutes I was about to subjectively take to think of a comeback. “If you like, Mr. Dirty.”

His big friend growls. “ENOUGH. We know your secret.”

[ HERO TARGETED: THE THUNDER CHIEF ]

I blink up at the weirdo. “What secret? Oh, is this the Oneshot thing again?”

Mr. Dirty steps forward. “The secret that you were once a Chosen, and only then became a Prophet.”

“Yeah? What about… Oh wait, that’s it? That’s just a thing that happened. It’s not even a secret.”

Dirty Boy loses a bit of his ease for the first time since I showed up to watch his interrogation of the now-long-gone girl.

But Thunder… Pants… Whatever, the big guy only looks more tense. “It should be.”

I blink up at him. “Kay… Why?”

The hair-metal-wrestler grunts out a single word. “Apotheosis.”

Dirty Boy nods, apparently having caught onto the fact that I don’t know what that, or any of this, is about. “You taught Fulgora something. About the core of Surge itself. And you did it while you were already attuned. That’s important for its own reason. But what you taught it… We need to know. And you need to sign an agreement with a noble faction. It doesn’t matter which one. But I’m afraid it’s non-negotiable.”

I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I get what he wants. “Okay. I’ll teach you what I taught her and sign whatever you want. For a price.”

“What price? You want Stormlands access? Done. Just tell us what you told Fulgora and-”

“For all of us.”

“What?”

“Everyone here. I’ve been wandering around long enough to see what this is.”

Dirty Deeds blanches, but to his credit, sounds halfway convincing as he tries to cover. “Oh?”

“You’ve made a slave labor camp. In Heaven.”

Thunder Chief scoffs. “We ask nothing of them. Closer to prisoners, really. No, wait, prisoners have schedules. Livestock then.”

“You think that makes it better?! You think that makes ANY OF THIS OKAY???”

It’s Dirty’s turn to scoff at me now. “Tell me… How many people have you killed?”

I take all the time I need between moments to get ready. “Dunno.”

“Huh… Alright, how many times have you died?”

Even having lost count of that number far more recently, that doesn’t change the answer. “Dunno.”

He blinks at me. “Well then… Kinda stepped on my point there. Which is that-”

“DRAW!!!”

[ COMMON ACTION: IAI QUICKDRAW — INTENSITY: 349% ]

[ UNCOMMON ACTION: COUNTER SHEATHE — INTENSITY: 349% ]

[ RARE TOGGLE ON: EXTEND-O-SWORD — INTENSITY: 349% ]

[ POWER BLESSING: LIGHTNING BLADE — INTENSITY: 349% ]

From right behind me, Thunder Chief’s massive guitar-themed greataxe slams like a meteor into where I was just standing.

But instead, I’m already facing the other way, drawing an enlarging white blade bursting with electricity.

Touching his blade to mine, I teleport behind him that same instant. “BAM!!!”

[ COMMON ACTION: AURA BURST — INTENSITY: 291% ]

[ RARE TOGGLE OFF: EXTEND-O-SWORD — INTENSITY: 291% ]

[ POWER BLESSING: LIGHTNING BLADE — INTENSITY: 291% ]

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Electrified axe embedded in the ground, Thunder Pants gets slingshotted with even more force straight for Dirty Boy while my sword shrinks, gets supercharged again for good measure, and I resheathe it.

Just as his inertia is about to make them kiss, the big one explodes in even more lightning than my sword, and an even deeper gash down his center than his axe nearly gave me. Or maybe not. I could totally see that shit splitting me in half if I didn’t get the counter off.

A three and two digit number respectively floats up out of them as they both just… Shrug off my best attack. Damn. Better damage than I managed against Oneshot, but I was kinda hoping for a bit more oomph after that powerup, you know? Not to mention the sword upgrade. Or… No, I was doing just fine against normal attackers even before that. And I hit that guy hard just now. Almost as hard as he hit himself half a dozen times over. Which begs the question… How high-level are these guys?

The Chief’s greataxe flies to his hand as he gets up to face me in no particular hurry while Mr. Deeds brushes off his suit jacket. The singe marks from when his friend exploded just kind of slough off as he wipes. Probably a Skill. Probably a lot of Skills.

Everyone else starts running.

Thunder Chief grunts as soon as the screaming quiets down. “Impressive.”

Dirty Deeds nods. “Indeed. Say, Mrs. Crimson, how did you react that fast? I’ve never seen a Level Thirteen quite so-”

“GO!!!”

[ MOVEMENT BLESSING: SURGE ]

The next instant, I reappear just a little too far behind him for my sword to reach.

“DRAW!!!”

The lengthening white blade explodes with lightning even as I draw it to slice straight through Dirty’s stupid fucking hat, and all the way down.

“BAM!!!”

Dirty Dan gets thrown into Thunder Tom even as my sword shrinks and I resheathe it-

Cushioning his Dirty little friend, the big guy stabs his axe forward. It doesn’t hit me.

Then he twists and pulls, almost effortlessly hooking my katana by the hilt, and then yanking it straight out of my hands.

Already recovered, they both smirk as it goes flying diagonally behind them.

I try to look worried for half a moment before uttering a single word, teleporting to my katana, and catching it as it erupts in lightning. “BACK.” I then use every scrap of momentum I can scrounge up to fluidly SLAM it down on the Thunder Chief from just above and behind his head.

On its way through his friend, Dirty Deeds grabs the sword, negates its lightning, and seems to move it through his body, injecting it straight into my chest with a palm strike from his other hand.

I feel like this should hurt. It probably would if I had pain turned on. And maybe it’s just the battle high, but rolling on the ground like this is… Fun.

The world speeds up as I belatedly realize I should’ve let go of the sword and zipped away.

I try to hold my breath. But I can’t.

I try to say something. Anything. I can’t do that either.

Oh… I’m winded. Fuck.

Sped up as his voice is, Thunder Chief almost sounds like he’s talking at the cadence of a normal person. “How dare you. How dare you teach the Thunder God anything. How dare you become chosen, let alone prophet. how dare you remain one… WITH HAIR THE COLOR OF FLAME!!!”

Dirty Deeds sounds like a chipmunk now though. “Yes, your Title is… Unfortunate. But we will have to insist you change the hair. Yellow would be ideal. But anything will do so long as it’s not red.”

A silence extends.

The small guy sounds less like a chipmunk now, but with the first hint of hostility I’ve heard from him, despite the fact he laid me out. “We can see you’re breathing… We know you’re not dead… We would’ve gotten a notification if-”

I roll onto my side in a huff and a cough of bloody mucus. “Oh my god, FINE.” Apparently, playing dead just isn’t gonna work here. Has it ever? I feel like it did… Once.

Thunder Chief growls. “SOO???”

“So… Wh-Oh. The hair color? No, I’m not about to change-”

Dirty Deeds tisks.

My Radial Awareness detects something small and fast just behind my head.

I try to hold my breath.

But I’m still out of it.

[ YOU DIED — XP DEBT: 131,072 — RESPAWN DELAY: 8 HOURS ]

[ VENGEANCE QUEST GAINED: AVENGE YOURSELF — SUCCESS: DEAL A KILLING BLOW TO DIRTY DEEDS AND THE THUNDER CHIEF — BONUS 1: DEAL BOTH KILLING BLOWS SIMULTANEOUSLY — BONUS 2: DEAL BOTH KILLING BLOWS WHILE THEY ARE ON THE SAME TEAM — FAILURE: NONE — XP: 262,144 — REWARD 1: 1 LEGENDARY ITEM FROM DIRTY DEED’S INVENTORY — REWARD 2: 1 LEGENDARY ITEM FROM THE THUNDER CHIEF’S INVENTORY — DIFFICULTY: HARDEST ]

What? But… No, I countered the big guy, but I attacked that little guy before he hit me. I should’ve lost something with that. Unless they’re… On a team! And they’re… How high-leveled again? Oh. Oooh. And woah, that’s a lot of XP on offer.

My mood takes a turn for the depressive when I remember that Quest XP only counts towards XP Debt until it’s paid off. It’s just killing monsters and Achievements that get divided half-and-half.

I vaguely remember the Oneshot quest having an XP reward… How much was it?

No, don’t think about it. It’ll just make me sad.

Actually, it already did. That’s like half the XP I need for this stupid Attunement step right there. Aaawe… But cheer up. I’ve got two Legendaries waiting for me in the morning.

I don’t dream of anything. I haven’t since that eight-year day.

And with that, the same instant I died, I respawn at a Rest Area about ten miles away. “My hair-”

[ MOVEMENT BLESSING: SURGE ]

It’s not long before I spot them, miles away from the nearest other ‘living’ person.

So I reset to veer in their direction. “Isn’t red-”

[ MOVEMENT BLESSING: SURGE ]

Just like that, I’m right above where they’re still standing over my fresh corpse, presumably talking about what they’ll do for the next eight hours while they wait to kill me again. Well, I know exactly what they’ll do.

I get ready as I start to draw my other sword. “IT’S-”

[ RARE TOGGLE ON: EXTEND-O-SWORD — INTENSITY: 384% ]

I SWING the lava chainsaw to rain a torrent of magma down on them. “CRIMSON!!!”

[ MOVEMENT BLESSING: SURGE ]

The moment after I use my Blessing again, the entire area for over a mile in every direction, erupts in a pillar of divine lightning.

[ YOU DIED — XP DEBT: 131,072 — RESPAWN DELAY: 8 HOURS ]

Fuck… I thought I could outrun the lightning if I was already lightning. Well, lesson learned.

And I didn’t even get the finishing blow… Which, now that I think about it, should’ve been obvious. Still though. Fuck those guys. How high-level were they again?

Heh… Enjoy the Debt, you ACDCocksuckers…

Eight hours later, I respawn just in time to see the entire lifespan of the… It really is a pillar of lightning, huh? Stretching straight from the ground to the ceiling a couple hundred miles up.

I just stand there, watching it.

It stays active for a lot of minutes. An hour? Probably not.

But I’m laying in bed enjoying the view by the time it starts to fizzle out.

Which is when someone walks up and stutters a bit. “Excuse me? Um. Mrs. Crimson? Is that what you go by?”

Mood entirely ruined, I get out of bed and stop watching the admittedly waning show. “Jessie is fine.”

“Sorry, but… Jessie. Did I hear you right? You are a prophet? In that case would you be open to bringing a few of us into a dungeon up above? I have Team Teleport. I can ferry people back and forth and you can get us through without Fulgora killing us all. This is perfect! I’m sure we can get you… What… A thousand JSD per day? And you just have to sit there! It’ll take a few years, but you can help with the XP bottleneck and if we can get more dungeons to show up within a couple dozen miles of each other, we could double, no, TRIPLE the-”

[ HERO TARGETED: TRAVIS ]

I stare at him blankly as he talks, growing more and more horrified as I hear his proposal.

No… No, I can’t. I can’t help all these people with their quests. If I carry one, then I’ll have to… No. Not again.

I won’t be tied down again! “Busy.”

[ MOVEMENT BLESSING: SURGE ]