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1.29 - Present Mich - Day 49 : Lunch

1.29 - Present Mich - Day 49 : Lunch

MICH : LEVEL 7

DAY 49 : A-DAY, THIRDWEEK, BOREAS, YEAR 1

CENTRAL 4 : RESTAURANT 2 : LUNCH

[ NEW S.T.A.T.S — STRENGTH: MAGICAL=21 - PHYSICAL=20 — TENACITY: DEFENSE=21 - SPEED=20 — APTITUDE: MANA=21 - STAMINA=20 — TILT: CONTROL=21 - LUCK=20 ]

[ NEW UNCOMMON CORE PASSIVE: EIDETIC MEMORY — EFFECT: SOUL/BODY LINK CLEANSED ]

[ NEW UNCOMMON C.L.A.S.S. ACTION: ATTUNED ARROW — EFFECT 1: YOU MAY CHARGE A NOCKED ARROW UP TO 1 ADDITIONAL TIME BEFORE FIRING — EFFECT 2: APPLIES ATTUNEMENT-BASED DAMAGE TO ALL CHARGES — COST: TINY MANA — STRENGTH SCALING: MAGICAL — WARNING: WITHOUT ATTUNEMENT, ELEMENT DEFAULTS TO SHINE ]

[ NEW RARE C.L.A.S.S. ACTION: ARROW BURST — EFFECT 1: YOU MAY CHARGE A NOCKED ARROW UP TO 1 ADDITIONAL TIME BEFORE FIRING — EFFECT 2: EACH CHARGE CAUSES 2 TIMES THE NUMBER OF ARROWS TO FIRE ON RELEASE — COST: MEDIUM MANA — TILT SCALING: CONTROL ]

[ NEW COMMON CORE PASSIVE: AUTO LOOT — EFFECT: ITEMS AND EQUIPMENT WHICH YOU OWN BUT HAVE NOT CLAIMED WITHIN A 92-CENTIMETER RADIUS ARE AUTOMATICALLY ADDED TO YOUR INVENTORY — TILT SCALING: CONTROL ]

[ NEW COMMON CORE ACTION: STIMULANT — EFFECT: ERASE TIREDNESS FOR THE NEXT 10 HOURS OR UNTIL DEACTIVATION — WARNING 1: WHEN DEACTIVATED, ALL DELAYED TIREDNESS WILL HIT AT ONCE — WARNING 2: YOUR PRESENCE IN A SAFE ZONE IS HIGHLY RECOMMENDED AT THAT TIME — COOLDOWN: EXTREME — TILT SCALING: LUCK ]

[ NEW UNCOMMON CORE TOGGLE: CLEANLINESS — EFFECT 1: ENVIRONMENTAL ELEMENTS YOU INTERACT WITH WILL NOT LEAVE ANY MARK ON YOUR PERSON OR CLOTHES — EFFECT 2: ANY FOREIGN MATERIAL NOT PART OF AN ACTIVE EFFECT WILL SLIDE OFF YOUR BODY— COST: MP DRAIN ]

Finally, something new happens. Without Jessie or myself doing anything but casting the latest of countless votes after our latest of countless battles with the latest of countless abominations, we aren’t teleported away. Instead, the rotting tree dungeon’s stagnant air goes completely inert. No, that’s the wrong word… Fresh. The air turns distinctly ‘fresh’. And we gaze on in befuddled fascination as the tree we’re standing in simply un-rots right before our eyes. There’s no announcement. No fanfare. Only silence as we gradually process what we just accomplished.

Two weeks after arriving, we wordlessly leave what Jessie has taken to calling ‘this gross fucking hellhole’. It’s finally gone. And it’s all we can do to process that fact. But there’s no celebration. No real excitement. Only a shared sigh as we lay down our burdens and descend from the newly healthy giant sprawling tree. And so, after two weeks of hell, we re-enter Heaven. Having, it seems, changed it for the better.

With a roughly 50% mix of declining exhaustion and building euphoria, the two of us start out at a dispassionate trudge, but end up practically floating down to where Ross and Rachel have been staying. It’s like any normal town. Except instead of pavement, there’s just moss. And instead of buildings, there’s just massive tree stumps with sprawling rooms carved into them. Even still, all the same franchises are present and accounted for, along with a few of what appear to be local favorites. At least it seems that way based on the perpetually-several-dozen-person lines stretching from their entrances.

[ WELCOME TO WELCOME HILL ]

[ LEVEL UP: +1=7 — SKILL POINTS: 2 — S.T.A.T.S: STRENGTH=2 - TENACITY=2 - APTITUDE=2 - TILT=2 — NEXT LEVEL: 8,192 XP ]

[ ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED - DUNGEON DESTROYER: YOUR VOTE TO DESTROY A DUNGEON HAS RESULTED IN ITS DESTRUCTION — REWARD: YOU MAY NOW VOTE AGAIN ON THE SAME DUNGEON CLEAR, AT THE COST OF HALF THE DINERO GAINED IN THAT RUN — XP: 32 ]

[ ACHIEVEMENT MILESTONE REACHED: LEVEL 2 ]

Walking through the logmade archway, I glance over at Jessie’s beatific grin. “Feels good doesn’t it?”

Jessie sighs contentedly. “You know..? It really does.”

Rachel meets us just inside Welcome Hill, hands on hips.

Ross stands impatiently next to her with his own arms folded. “So… You done?”

Apparently not registering the curtness in Ross’s question, Jessie beams back at him. “Yep!”

Somehow, this doesn’t seem to help Ross’s disposition.

In the spirit of not leaving half of our team pissed at the other, especially with me in that other, I’ve already prepared for this eventuality. So, I do a quick attention-grabbing sleight-of-hand flourish that ends in me holding up two tokens at the average eye-level between the other three. So basically, right at Rachel’s eyeline, below Ross’s, and above Jessie’s. Once they all notice what I’m holding, I grin. “So how about lunch?”

One unanimous agreement and trip to Welcome Hill’s Restaurant door later, I follow up with some advice based on past experience. “Try the burgers.”

As soon as we get inside, Jessie practically leaps into the seat directly facing the city and immediately orders a literal pile of burgers. They show up almost as immediately and from then on, she’s dead to the world.

Taking the leftmost seat, Ross does look interested in a burger of his own.

But Rachel shakes her head as she sits to Jessie’s right. “I’m vegan.”

Having been left the worst spot despite paying for everyone, I lean forward in my chair facing away from the massive window to Central. “…Why?”

“I don’t support animal cruelty.”

Nodding, I move to correct the misunderstanding. “I can respect that. My wife was a vegetarian, actually. Still is, God willing…” As soon as I realize I fell into that same mental spiral again, I make a concerted effort to clamber out, an effort pointedly enunciated by Jessie’s ravenous chewing. I think I might just need to stop bringing her up unprompted. “Anyway, all meat is generated by the system on-request.”

Rachel just stares at me blankly for a second before her mouth falls open in clear epiphany. “So… Wait, no animals were ever involved in any meat in this restaurant?”

I take a big bite of the burger already in front of me, and don’t have to fake the euphoria I only exacerbate by chewing. “Nawp.” I savor the bite and put on a show of swallowing. “Not just The Restaurant, though. The entirety of Heaven works like that. And not just for food. If you’ve ever wanted to give leather armor a shot, all of what you’re used to avoiding as ‘animal products’ are well and truly cruelty-free. They aren’t even really animal products.”

By the end of my diatribe, Rachel is looking around enviously at the rest of us now enjoying burgers of our own. “Well goddamn…” Then she turns to the seemingly omnipresent waiter. “Gimme one o’ them shits.”

I chuckle through another bite of my burger. “So fast?”

Rachel rolls her eyes even as the perfectly-grilled burger is instantly rolled out to her. “No one goes vegan because it tastes better.” She takes a bite as soon as it’s dropped in front of her. Then two more in quick succession. Only then does she pause long enough to moan in ecstasy. “Oh my god, YES.”

A dozen, apparently, burgers later, Jessie exits her feral food trance and looks at me. “So hey, I’ve been thinking…”

I look up from my own third burger. “Yeah?”

“Do you know what a ‘True Random Mod Stone’ is?”

My eyebrows raise slightly before settling just a smidge higher than where they started. “Maybe. Not that I’m trying to be vague. The fact that it’s not a ‘yes’ is saying something. I got Eidetic Memory a month back… Great Skill by the way. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s as though there was a layer of scum covering my entire spirit. And then it was gone. It was actually a lot like when Central Air first turned on.”

Looking down at her food, Jessie grumbles out a shrug.

Interesting response… I really thought I could get her to splurge on it with that pitch like she did for me the last time we were here. Oh well… “It just so happens that I read through all the System help books I could access while mindlessly shooting limbs off of helicoptering slime lizards. None of that reading mentioned anything like ‘True’ in regards to the name of a mod stone.”

I rush to head off the argument when I notice Jessie’s visibly disappointed skepticism. “But that doesn’t mean they don’t exist or anything. It could just mean they’re exceptionally rare, to the point of not being well-documented. I bet it’d go for a fortune though. If you don’t know what it does, why not sell it?” I raise an encouraging eyebrow. “I’d be surprised if it didn’t pay off the katana from that first town in full.”

Jessie’s eyes widen as she vigorously shakes her head. “Oooh no. You said something similar the last time we talked about this. But every single Mod Stone is a permanent unlock just waiting to happen. You’d have to be crazy not to at least use the rare ones on yourself, right?”

As much as I hesitate to entertain that skewed logic, I nod along for lack of an argument. But then I think of literally anything to discourage this girl’s recklessness. “Well, if it really were permanent, then sure. But any Mod you use on equipment goes down the toilet when you get new gear. And the Skill Mods go right down that same toilet when you respec.”

Jessica drops her fork. “What? But why?”

“It’s a respec. That means either your CLASS or CRAFT changes. Which means those Skills go too.”

“No, I mean why would I respec? Also, you can mod SKILLS??? I thought that was an equipment-only thing!”

It’s all I can do to vacantly stare back at her. “Y-ye-”

“GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!!!” Jessie jumps up and the stone under foot cracks at her repeated stomping. “You’re telling me… That this entire time… I could’ve modded that stupid-ass water breathing Skill?”

Ross tries to comfort her. “Come on now. It can’t be that bad, can it? I see you using it all the time. Before we split up, at least. I can’t really speak for the last two weeks. Why the sudden turn?”

Jessie snaps her head in Ross’s direction and just stares at him. “Of course I have it on all the time… IT’S PASSIVE!!!”

I rack my brain to think up a solution for the girl. “What about an attunement? When you pick an element, wouldn’t that Skill’s element change along with it? I know that’s how it works with my Attuned Arrow Skill.”

Jessie barks out a derisive laugh clearly aimed squarely at herself. Yeah… And how long until that happens? Months? Years?

Ross chokes on his food. “Years?” He takes a big swig of Cherry Coke Zero. After a well-fought battle to swallow, he manages to dislodge the bit stuck in his throat before continuing. “I know we just spent the last couple weeks at a standstill. But I figured that would be an exception, not the rule. Maybe it was just that we could see our destination from the start, but I really didn’t think I was signing up for a multi-year thing here.”

Rachel gestures placatingly at him. “Woah there… I agree with the sentiment. But I’m sure that’s not what Jessie was saying.” She looks over at her for confirmation. “Right?”

Jessie seems a little flustered at that. “What? I mean… No? I was just saying that I don’t want to wait that long to not be throwing water around every time I swing a sword. Not now that I know how to stop it without respeccing.”

That seems to calm Ross down as he sighs in relief and digs back into his meal.

Meanwhile, I try to get the conversation back on track. “But… You said you only have the Random Mod Stone, right?”

Jessie shakes her head. “No, I also have an Uncommon one. But… Wait a second… Yeah, no. I just checked the options for Elemental Breathing, and the Mods that change its element start at Rare.”

“But… What if you end up getting something worse than water?”

“Honestly? Anything would be better. I mean sure, the extra damage is nice. But it’s like a fucking squirtgun every time I swing my damn sword. I’ve been trying not to splash all over myself all the time. But a big part of what made the last two weeks such a nightmare is that I always, always got wet every time I swung the fucking thing.”

Ross snickers through his slurping up a spaghetti noodle.

Jessie points a filthy fork at him. “Shut up.” She turns away from a scandalized Ross and back to me. “Stupid Cleanliness Skill doesn’t work on pure water… And being drenched all the time does not work with my fighting style. It’s just fucking annoying is what it is. So, yeah. Anything else is good. I just wish I knew Skills were moddable two weeks ago.”

Rachel looks up, mouth full of her first good burger since she went vegan. “You really didn’t know you could mod Skills? What’d you think the little empty circle next to all the Skills meant?”

Jessie looks confused for a second, then briefly angry at herself as she browses her system menu before finally shrugging in defiant resignation. “Fuck if I know. All this shit’s still new to me. I’ve got no clue what most of it is and all these numbers and graphs… Not like I can count on knowing everything before I do anything anyway. Let alone a random empty circle.” She sighs in elevated resignation as her defiance evaporates. “But yeah… I noticed the circle the first time I saw it. I just never got around to looking it up. I always had something better to do. And the weird circle wasn’t in the way, so I just kind of let it be. How should I have known it was so fucking vital?”

Ross pipes in again. “It’s the same circle as the ones on Equipment.”

Jessie starts to sulk. “Oh shut up.”

“And while I’m at it, you really should familiarize yourself with all those ‘numbers and graphs’ as you call them. There are a lot of easy ways to screw yourself over if you don’t know what you’re doing.”

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

Jessie narrows her eyes, flips him off, and proceeds to silently wolf down what is unmistakably still the best food she’s ever eaten. Besides maybe the last time we were here.

Eventually, I break the silence. “So wait… Let’s rewind a bit to the respec thing. You asked why you would do that? I know you’re familiar with the topic from games and things. So your dismissal of respeccing isn’t the usual confused avoidance of yet another risky, complicated thing to learn that most people never bother with.”

Ross and Rachel nod vigorously to each other through persistent mutual chewing.

I ignore them both, but especially Ross’s hypocrisy, as my attention stays on Jessie. “So are you really sure you’re keeping your starting CLASS and CRAFT? I seem to remember someone complaining about not getting any agency with that very topic more or less constantly when we first met.” I screw up my face to do my best Jessie impression, planning out how to feign sobs in a way that sounds more and more uncontrollable as I speak. “The FUCKING game picked it FOR me-hee-heee…”

Some time passes. I’m not sure how much, or what Jessie’s reaction is. I’m far too busy pretending to wipe my eyes dry of all these imitation tears.

Jessie waits patiently for my little show to end before kicking my shin under the table, even while clearly fighting back a smile. “Well now I’m gonna use them both.”

I blink at that. Really? Just because I made fun of her? “Well, alright I guess. As long as you’re sure, far be it from me to talk you out of something like that. And if I’m not talking you out of it, I might as well at least help you not complain incessantly about it for our whole trip to Central after you jump in without looking again.”

I fight back a smirk at her insulted look at my admittedly harsh roast. “And for that, we need information. So let’s start here… What does its description say? And have you ever looked at a ‘Random Mod Stone’? Basically like what you have, minus the ‘True’ part?”

Still retaining a residual mix of looking smugly scandalized, Jessie shakes her head. “Never seen one. And mine just says ‘ASSIGNS A RANDOM MOD’.”

I try to think that description through from every angle. “Y-yeah… That is wildly unhelpful, isn’t it?” I take a bite-filled moment to brainstorm how to tackle this. “So Jessie… Since neither of us knows what a 'true' random mod stone does, how about I just fill you in on ‘normal’ random ones? And whatever the 'true' bit intonates can be a kind of a cherry on top of the sundae for yours.”

Jessie shrugs noncommittally. “Sounds good, I guess. But… What's a cherry? And for that matter, what’s a ‘sundae’? Like the weekend?”

Ross's eyes go wide. “Oh my god… That is so, so sad.”

Rachel looks like she's about to cry. Then she gives Jessie what is clearly the most important advice she's ever imparted. “Order one right now. No arguing. Just do it. Actually, hold on a sec. Ice cream here doesn’t involve animals either, does it? Alright, I’m getting one too. Two of them, even.” She cranes her head challengingly at the waiter. “Three…”

Rolling her eyes at Rachel, Jessie nonetheless orders a sundae while using a fry like a baton to wave me on with my explanation.

I smile back indulgently. “Okay so first, here’s how Mod Stones work. You get a Common Stone and put it in… Let’s say a weapon. That’ll let you pick from all the Common-rarity mods compatible with the weapon, and install that mod directly. Which, being Common, will net it a small additional boost to range or damage or something.” I shrug. “Depends on the weapon.”

“So then different weapons have different mods?”

“Everything has different mods. It’s all based on the type of thing that it is. Like, a boost to fire damage doesn’t make sense on a weapon incapable of fire damage. So, ‘Boosted Fire Damage’ won’t be available as a mod in that case. Although Added fire damage might be featured among the Rare ones. Or void or lightning or whatever. As is clearly true with your breathing Skill, there tends to be all sorts of elemental stuff at that rarity. Not that you’d have much chance of finding a Rare Mod Stone anytime soon. Those are, as you might’ve guessed, rare. But you see what I’m getting at. A mod stone of any given rarity would let you pick any single mod available for that weapon at the same rarity.”

Jessie nods. “Seems simple enough. So then what about my random one?”

“I’m getting to that. Next, in fact. It’s just that Random Mod Stones have a weird relationship with rarity, so I felt like I should cover the basics. But say you use a Random on the same weapon. That’ll give it a 50% chance to randomly assign something from the available pool of Common Mods. But it also has an additional 25% chance to randomly assign an Uncommon one. 12.5% for Rare. And so on until a 1.5% chance to land you with a Mythic. But you also have the same 1.5% odds to get nothing at all. And ‘nothing’ consumes the stone and uses a slot just as readily as any actual mod would.”

Jessie waves an ice cream-covered fry at me. “Wait, what? Does that mean it’s stuck? How stuck? Like forever stuck? Seriously?”

Rachel looks at the fry Jessie’s holding. Then at her own ice cream. To her own fries. Back to Jessie. And back to her food.

I shake my head at Jessie. “Well, you can change to another mod and re-use the slot. But doing that gives you the same amount of XP-Debt as when you die. That’s an entire fourth of a levels-worth of XP every time you switch mods. So most people don't tend to bother. Unless they get like a crazy powerful thing with bad mods on it or something.”

“That sounds like a massive pain in the ass. So then is my random mod just garbage?”

“Actually, Random Mod stones are pretty popular. If you’re modding something, you’d usually have a specific goal. So normal Mod Stones are expensive as all hell. But Random ones are dirt cheap. A lot of folks keep them around to slot into gear they just as randomly find. Every now and then, it lands them a high-rarity mod that turns their relative trash into treasure. Although it usually just ends up turning trash into slightly different trash, at the cost of a mod stone and a shitload of XP to reverse it. But you can still make a good profit by throwing random mods into everything you find and then selling each of the good ones for more money than you put into all those attempts.”

“So then I should just throw mine into whatever and roll the dice?”

“Well, I don’t know that I’d go that far. At your level, I’d actually recommend throwing it into a Skill you don’t have a good use for. Your Attunement Breath for example.”

“Wait, but you just said no one does that. You know… Because it’s stupid? And weren’t you just trying to convince me not to?”

I shake my head. “To answer your second question first, you absolutely shouldn’t do it. I’m talking about Random Mod Stones here. Since it isn’t even listed anywhere I can find, that tells me your ‘True’ one would net you far, far more money than anything you’re likely to get with the stone itself.”

I sigh. “But in terms of using ‘Normal’ Random Mod Stones, I said ‘most people’ don’t. ‘Most people’ have also been here for far longer than us. So the prospect of XP debt means that much more to them. But at our level, we’re not about to find good Mod Stones anytime soon. And using it on any gear you have now would land you a trash item even with a Mythic Mod on it.

That’s when I realize how into the explanation I’m getting. Maybe it’s just the teacher in me? “At least that’ll be the case several years from now when you’re rolling in innately stronger equipment. But Skills do scale forever. At least if you’re serious about never respeccing. You’ll probably end up with a wet sword that’s slightly different from the one you have now. Or you could luck into something overpowered compared to what you should be able to access at this point.”

I shrug. “You could also lock the Mod Slot and wind up with the choice between an even worse Skill than you have now, or XP-Debt for your trouble. But here’s the thing… At this stage, even a full level of XP is practically nothing. That’s what? A few days? A week? At higher levels, the same kind of debt will set you back months or even years. So by risking a couple days or weeks of wasted time now, you stand to maybe get something that’ll power-level you for decades. If your level was double what it currently is, I’d laugh at you for even taking the risk. But for you, right now, it’s actually a pretty safe bet.”

But Jessie isn’t listening. She’s clearly been in her own little world ever since I said ‘Mythic’, at which point she started stream-of-consciousness mumbling to herself. “‘True’ sounds like a modifier of ‘Mod Stone’. But Random Mod Stones aren’t actually ‘random’… So, does mine just even everything out so I’d have the same chance of getting a Mythic mod as I would a Common? Or maybe it randomizes the type of mod? So would I be just as likely to get any given element as I would a range increase? Or breathing pattern? Or-”

“I’m sorry, Jessie. I really don’t know.”

At the sound of her own name, Jessie jerks out of her relatively non-food-based trance and back to reality. “What? Sorry, I wasn’t listening.”

But I already knew that. “It’s fine. Your guess is as good as mine as far as all that goes, anyway.”

Jessie sighs right back as she eats another ice-cream-coated fry. “It’s just such a hard decision, you know? We have such limited resources, and so many things to use them on. I mean I’ve gotten… I don’t even know how many Skills since I’ve been here. Not to mention armor pieces. Not to mention weapons. Not to mention all the other shit we come across every day. But only two Mod Stones. And both of those from either killing or getting killed by other humans. Is PvP the only way you get them or what?”

Ross and Rachel both look at Jessie in mild alarm.

I just shake my head. So many red flags from this girl. And so young. Younger than the greenest recruit I ever trained. Except she never needed conditioning. Or training. Or even convincing. Not to fight. Or hurt. Or even to kill. She just did it all right away. It was never even a problem for her. Not like… What? Whether or not to use a silly little lottery stone? I do eventually break out of my worried, contemplative fugue state. “Actually, I started with one.”

Jessie blinks at me. “Come again?”

“Tell me this… After you died, what happened?”

“First thing I remember? I woke up in an empty field. Or maybe I just ‘appeared’ there? The transition from Earth felt closer to blinking than sleeping.”

“And then?”

“Then I laid there in the grass for like three days.”

My eyes widen. “Three days… What were you doing for three days?”

“Thinking.”

“About what?”

“Stuff.”

“Such as?”

“I dunno… Life? The universe? Everything?”

I don't quite know how to quantify that. So she confronted it all? Immediately? What does that signify? It can’t be normal. It’s gotta mean something about her, right? Strong willpower? Yeah… And water is wet.

Ross chuckles through the silence. “It only took you three days to come up with ‘42’?”

Everyone just looks at him in vaguely disgusted confusion.

As his gaze pans around the table, Ross slumps more and more with each pair of eyes he meets. Eventually, he looks down at his plate and diligently goes back to eating.

I try to get things back on track. “Fast forward a bit.”

Jessie starts, looking from Ross back to me. “Huh?”

“After you finished all that… The thinking, the customization, all of it, did you see a bunch of items show up in that field?”

“Yeah.”

“How many.”

Jessie shrugs. “Dunno. Didn’t count.”

I had a few dozen, myself. “But once I chose one to keep, all the rest disappeared.”

Jessie’s eyes bulge. “What? So that…”

I nod in understanding. “That’s when I got my Mod Stone. A Mythic one, in fact. Even if I did use it on something demonstrably stupid and short-sighted. I guess part of why I’m trying to help you make an informed decision is so you don’t regret it the way I regret wasting mine. No one, not me, not us, not anyone, has the right to tell you what to do. Especially when it comes to building your own power. Just… When you do, just promise you’ll be cool, calm, and-”

Jessie waves her arms in protest. “WOAH, woah, woah… Hold on a goddamned second… You got to choose one of those items to keep?”

I tilt my head in confusion. “I mean… Yes?”

Jessie’s mouth drops open. Several seconds pass before she finally manages a retort. “…FUCK!!!” Then she sinks into herself. When she comes out of it in a far less exuberant mood, she folds her arms and mumbles at the table. “Anyway, I made you all armor… It’s not as great as whatever I didn’t get in that field.” She spasms in her seat, but suppresses it in short order. “But at least it’s some slick black armor I crafted from those things we were fighting. So, it’ll be an extinct material if I have anything to say about it.”

Ross chuckles, seeming to finally recover from his flubbed joke. “Did you just declare a holy war on… What? That specific mob?”

Jessie has to think that through. She eats the rest of her food before replying. “I think I’ll go with ‘any kind of troll-ass monster that sucks to fight’. But for now, I can do you all a favor and keep my little genocidal crusade to the really intolerable ones.”

“So then you’ll just go out of your way to fight them?”

Another plate arrives.

Jessie looks at it. Then at him. Back to the plate. With a visible effort of will, she answers him before touching it. “I think I get where you’re going with this. For the sake of our trip to Central, I can keep it to just the one.” Seeming to fall to her own somehow-still-extant hunger, she sighs wistfully as she takes the first bite of her something-teenth burger. “It’s a long-term goal. But I cleared my first cesspit already, so that’ll have to be good enough for now.”

Jessie shakes her head. “They all really do need to go. I’m not compromising on that. But it’s not like I’m in any kind of hurry. The rest can come later.” Expression turning somber, she looks flatly at the three of us in turn. “Anyway, here’s your armor. It looks just like the armor you gave me when I asked for stuff you liked the look or feel of, but that you couldn’t use anymore.”

[ TRADE QUERY: JESSIE — OFFERED: COMMON SLIZARDIC HELM - COMMON SLIZARDIC CUIRASS - COMMON SLIZARDIC PAULDRONS - COMMON SLIZARDIC FAULDS - COMMON SLIZARDIC LEFT GAUNTLET - COMMON SLIZARDIC RIGHT GAUNTLET - COMMON SLIZARDIC LEFT GRIEVE - COMMON SLIZARDIC RIGHT GRIEVE — REQUESTED: $1 ]

Rachel’s eyes water a little. “Oh Jessie… You shouldn’t have.” But then her smile falters. “Is this all… Heavy Armor?”

Jessie winces. “Yeah… Sorry, I can’t make anything else. CRAFT restriction. But feel free to trade it or sell it or whatever you want. It’s yours. One of the Skills available for my Form would let me convert Medium or Light Armor into Heavy. So I bet you won’t have to look too hard for a light or medium armor blacksmith to change it for you. Maybe even in Welcome Hill.”

Rachel blushes. “Wow… You put a lot of thought into this, huh?” She belatedly beams at Jessie. “Thank you.”

I wholeheartedly agree.

[ TRADE ACCEPTED: JESSIE ]

[ ITEMS GAINED: COMMON SLIZARDIC HELM - COMMON SLIZARDIC CUIRASS - COMMON SLIZARDIC PAULDRONS - COMMON SLIZARDIC FAULDS - COMMON SLIZARDIC LEFT GAUNTLET - COMMON SLIZARDIC RIGHT GAUNTLET - COMMON SLIZARDIC LEFT GRIEVE - COMMON SLIZARDIC RIGHT GRIEVE ]

[ USD LOST: $1 ]

Ross nods emphatically. “Oh that’s more than okay. As long as I stay above the threshold, there’s no loss from the weight difference. I can’t wear it all at once, but I can definitely incorporate at least half the pieces into what I use now. It’s a great gift. Thank you. It’s just a bit surprising is all. I never thought of you as someone who’d just give away free stuff.”

Jessie shrugs, looking distinctly less comfortable than when he’d insulted her. “I can make it myself now. It’s not like I didn’t have enough of the parts. And besides… I wanted to thank you guys somehow.”

“What? What’d we do?”

“You… Waited around. For two weeks, even. That’s not nothing.”

Ross stills at that. “…Huh…”

“What’s that?”

“Nothing, it’s just… I didn’t know you cared.”

“It was two weeks for me too, you know. A fulfilling, yet boring two weeks where, among other things, I thought about a lot of stuff. And then I got all those materials… It only seemed right. I mean I still have so many. I actually wish I could make stuff other than Heavy Armor. I’ve probably got enough raw grossest-shit-ever parts to make anything there’s a blueprint for.”

Then Jessie seems to remember something. “Actually, that reminds me… I do have all those weapons. You guys want a weapon? They’re all sleek and black and shit. I can’t condone the monsters themselves, but they gave some pretty good drops. Not enough for me to regret removing them from Heaven entirely. But still…”

Rachel takes less time to think it through than for the diatribe to run its course. “Got any wands? Or a staff? I’d prefer a wand, but I’d still love a new staff.”

Jessie smirks back at her. “Here’s both.”

The next moment, Rachel’s unfocused eyes light up. The one after that, she’s holding a long black staff up above the table. It seems to throb with energy.

Ross looks at her ascanse and tries to cover his food from whatever’s about to fall off the thing. “Put that away. Think of where it’s been.” Ross raises an eyebrow at Jessie after confirming Rachel’s chastised removal of the monstrosity-remnant from above his food. “Got any beds?”

I kick him under the table.

Ross winces, but otherwise pretends like it didn’t happen.

Jessie doesn’t seem to notice though. “Sorry, no. I did get one of those. But I’m using it.” Then she seems to remember something. “Wait, since when the fuck is that a weapon?”

Ross folds his arms in consternation. “I guess you’re right… Got any katanas?”

“You… Want a katana?”

Ross shakes his head. “Two.”

“You want two katanas?”

Ross nods, ignoring glares from Rachel and I. “She got two. I thought that’s what you were offering.”

“Yeah, sure. But are you though? Sure, that is?” A few seconds of silence later, Jessie shrugs. “Alright. Good choice. Man after my own heart.”

Ross’s eyes dart all around, clearly surprised at what he sees in his trade window. And then even more surprised after accepting. He focuses back on Jessie. “You sure? I know what you’re building to. You need all the katanas you can get.”

Jessie shakes her head. “I said any weapon was fine. And I meant it. Besides, I don’t need ‘All the katanas I can get’. At most, I’ll only ever need three of the same one. And… I mean, we were in there for two weeks. I still have seven more of those katanas after the two I gave you.”

Ross looks like he choked on a meatball. “Oh. I mean… But I don’t really use katanas.”

“I know.”

“So… Any way I can get some different weapons?”

Rachel walks around the table to smack the back of his head. “You made your bed on this one. And we’re all gonna watch you lie in it.”

Ross looks flustered for a moment. But then he sighs. “Yeah… I guess that’s fair.” He shuts up and eats his spaghetti.