"Er... are you alright Mr. Lorne? If you're not up for it, we can just come back at a later date." asked the Old MIB guy to Theo who was currently lying sideways on the floor in a fetal position.

"Dont worry about it. I'm just experiencing a combination of stress, identity crisis and a mental breakdown. I'll get over it in an hour or two." replied Theo. "Anyways, I think introductions are in order? You guys already know who I am so we'll skip mine."

Vanadis, one the 2 main reasons for his current state, has left for somewhere.

This did wonders to his stress levels. At least he did not need to walk on eggshells anymore.

"Okaaay. If you say so. My name is Agent P. I'm in charge of negotiations. The beautiful yet serious woman is Agent A. She is what you call an infiltrator. The skinny glasses guy is Agent K. He's our resident tech wiz. We are from the Bureau of Internal Security. A pleasure to meet you Mr. Lorne." said the Old MIB.

"The Feds huh..... Shit."

The Bureau of Interal Security (BIS), or more commonly known as 'The Feds' for some reason, was the intelligence agency of the Commonwealth.

It was a common trope in movies that depicted the BIS as the Commonwealth's espionage, anti spy and secret police division.

Wether this was true or not was up for debate.

FYI: It was true.

Unfortunately for the BIS agents, Theo was allied with the Hassan i Sabbah which happened to be greatest espionage group in the world.

By combining the facial recognition software in his cybernetic eye and Jabir's database, Theo could easily find out who these 3 were even if their records no longer exist anywhere in the Commonwealth.

"Nice to meet you Perry De Flatyfus, Agnesse Corter and Kenny Kormik." replied Theo.

Naturally, the BIS agents were unsettled that Theo knew of their real identities.

He also made sure that they were agents of BIS.

"H-how-?" asked P in disbelief.

"Spies and swindlers visit me once in a while. They try to manipulate me into doing something or try to extort money from me. It's only natural for me to make sure the people I welcome into my home will not do me harm." said Theo in a calm yet threatening manner.

While he may be in the middle of an identity crisis, Miss Samantha has trained him well enough to instinctively manipulate those who he conversed with.

He may fail most of the time but he was a firm believer of the saying 'Failure is the foundation of Success'.

Though intimidated, P was able to quickly recover.

"*sigh*... Looks like our plans are out the window." said P while pulling off a skillful facade of defeat.

Theo would have fallen for it if he wasnt trained by the greatest liar in the world.

"No small talk. Do not beat around the bush. Tell me what you want." said Theo.

"Very well. I was suppose to subtly get some info out of you first, but I guess I'll just ask you straight. Are you familiar of a woman named Daisy Nolens?"

Fortunately for Theo, all incidents within his domain were recorded in great detail. This way, he was privy to anything that happened even if he was not present.

One quick seach and he was able to find a match from on of the Eisenritters' memories.

"You mean that lady who tried to sneak into our factory 1 year ago to do some corporate espionage?" replied Theo

"Y-yes. Her. If possible, we would like to negotiate for her release."

"Not possible."

"We are willing to pay if that is what you want."

"It's not about money. The main problem lies in the fact that we already tortured her for info. Once we got what we wanted, she was fed to one of the many man eating abominations in the scrapyard. We cant give her back to you even if we wanted to."

Theo was actually bullshitting.

Daisy Nolens was alive and well..... as a Reformant unit.

The SOP for dealing with spies was to 'indoctrinate' them. That way, any evidence would be erased and all of their knowledge would be saved inside Theo's ever growing information database.

It may not be as all incompassing as Jabir's, but was much more detailed in certain areas.

Note: Theo had no idea this happened to Daisy Nolens. His troops were simply following his mandate.

And as expected, one of the agents didnt take it well.

"You bastard!" roared K as he lunged at Theo.

Pastor Biajo, who was silent during the talks, caught K in mid lunge and gently pushed him back to his seat.

"Calm down BIS agents." said Pastor Biajo.

"How do you expect us to calm down when one of our own is dead?!" roared K

"If you wont, they will kill you." replied Biajo as he pointed behind the agents.

There were 5 maid clad Eisenmadchen who had their HF Blades drawn and were itching to skewer the MIBs.

Theo was impressed at the Eisenmadchen's skill at stealth. They were able to sneak into the room without the MIB's knowledge.

They are not his elite troops for nothing.

"Stand down girls." said Theo who was still on the floor.

The Eisenmadchens sheathed their blades and stood at the corners of the room. However, they did not hide their animosity towards the MIBs.

"Miss Nolens revealed to us an interesting bit of information. Outside of the law abiding citizens of Vermilion City, the BIS has not been able to assert any form of control. Criminals would outright kill you. The morally flexible individuals would hire criminals to kill you. The Superheroes have a massive justice boner up their ass to do what is required. Aside from the center of the city, the law enforcement are too corrupt or too incompetent to do anything."

This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

The agents were both angry and uncomfortable of Theo's words since it was all true.

"Now now. Let's all calm down everyone. We are all civil people here right?" said P.

"That is where you are wrong Mr. Perry. I am part of the 'morally flexible' group. While I am more than willing to cut a deal with the authorities, I am also more than willing to slaughter your entire family right in front of your eyes. If you harass my business or cause inconvenience to my family.... well... I have lots of ways to make you scream for a very long time." said Theo as he used the Mafia-like threat script.

From the looks on the MIB's faces, it seemed to have worked.

"Mr. Lorne, we are not your enemies." said P

"That remains to be seen. Anyways, we have wasted a lot of time already. Tell me what you want so I can price you accordingly."

"*sigh*.... Fine. First, I would like to know if you are familiar with this person." said P as he passed a photo to Theo.

One look at the person and Theo knew this was going to be trouble.

"Carmen Femme Fatale..... shit."

"Indeed. Though that is her stage name. Her real name is Karen Pechenko. Approximately 15 years old and a famous child actress who's practically a household name thanks to her latest Broadway film..... and unfortunately, she is big on the activist scene. She belongs to the 'Ally of Justice', a group of professional protesters/rioters known for violent clashes with the police."

"I know. But I have a gut feeling you don't want me to kill her. That's way too easy. You guys can do it without breaking a sweat."

"Correct. Now, I would like for you to look at this picture."

This time around, it was a photo of a very fancy coffin. It had a very Ecclesiarcial design, complete with angels, golden halos and alike. It was also sealed by a jet black chain wrapped around it.

Agent P beckoned Pastor Biajo to explain.

"That is one of 2 things: something completely harmless or something that could wipe out the entire city." said Pastor Biajo.

"That... does not sound good." replied Theo.

"You don't know the half of it. That thing is called a 'Sanctuary'. It may look like a coffin, but it is actually a very comfortable room that allows angels to sleep without drowning the nearby vicinity with massive amounts of mana they unconsciously radiate."

"So it's the same as vampires?"

"Pretty much. They even do the whole 'sleep for millennia at a time' thing. Unfortunately, this one is so ancient that we have no idea who's inside it. The Ecclesiarcy history buffs has narrowed the sleeping beauty identity down to 6."

"I see. Can you give me their names?"

"Sadly I cant give you all of their identity. They're kind of a top secret info sort of thing similar to the real identity of The Boss *wink*. But I can give you the name of the angel we hope is not inside the sanctuary."

"And that is?"

"Azrael. The Angel of Death."

"Okaaaay.... now I'm terrified."

"And here's the annoying part. The Ally of Justice has this particular Sanctuary in their custody." said P.

"SAY WHAT?!" roared Theo in horror. "How did a bunch of spoiled, delusional, immature brats get their hands on the magical equivalent of a nuclear jack in a box?!"

"This was another one of the Jade Empire's many ploys to sabotage the Commonwealth from within. They are also the ones funding the Ally of Justice. Anyways, the smugglers have been dealt with. As for the masterminds, let's just say the Jade Empire is feeling the weight of some well placed economic sanctions."

"Then is it safe to assume that you want me to recover the box of doom from the spoiled brats?"

"The file did say that you were quick in the uptake. Here's the mission: (1) Retrieve the sanctuary. (2) Do not kill any of the famous personalities in the riot. Kill the rest if you want to. (3) In the unfortunate event that the Sanctuary is opened and it contains a hostile, request the aid of the Machine God."

".... Oh.... So that's what you're really after. You want to use the Machine God to do your dirty work huh." said Theo in a very displeased manner.

"What did you expect kid? Everyone, even the old fossils in the Ecclesiarchy, wants to kiss the ass of the most powerful Godlike in the world right now." jokingly replied Pastor Biajo.

"I see... so this is like one of those publicity stunts. They'll record the Machine God 'helping them out' and advertise it to the world that they partnered up."

"T-that's not the case! We consulted the Ecclesiarchy about this and they told us that it requires a divine to fight a divine. We have no one else to turn to." said P.

"Er... the Superheroes? Anyways, regardless of your intent, he wont be pleased." replied Theo.

"That is why we approached you. We hoped that you can put in a good word.'

"Then make it worth my while. The Machine God is very temperamental and he might just slap me like a fly for annoying him. It is not fun getting hit by a hundred kilo piece of steel you know?"

Mind you, he was most certainly going to accept this mission.

Aside from the obvious reason of protecting those he held dear, he had a more childish motive.

Even if his dream was no longer achievable, he still wanted to act like a superhero no matter how fleeting it may be.

And while he would jump at the chance to do the right thing, it was as a wise madman once said: 'If you are good at something, never do it for free.'

He'll milk the BIS for all of its worth.

If the negotiation does fail, he'll do the mission without their cooperation or consent.

Agent P took a deep breath and steeled himself.

"What are your terms."

"If you're truly an agent of the BIS, then you know about the permits that my company applied for a couple of weeks ago." replied Theo.

"You mean the Mass Driver Station?"

"Yep. Get that approved and we have a deal."

"Based on what I've read, it's the first of a 2 part construction for an affordable method of traveling to low orbit."

"You did your homework."

"That will probably cost more than an arm and a leg, but I'm sure I have enough pull with the Bureau of Finance to get a loan approved. If that's not enough, I'm sure there will be tons of corporations that are willing to pitch in. The BIS will help you go through the hoops."

"Oh, I don't need funding. I just need the land."

Naturally, the BIS agents were quite shocked.

"What?! Your documents listed a mass driver, an orbital elevator and a low orbit station! And the estimated time of completion is 50 years from now! There is no way you can fund that all by yourself!"

"Well duh. I already have a bunch of excessively rich people who are willing to fund the whole project. Here's a tip.... Nosferatu is one of them."

"O-oh... I see..."

Watching P falter upon hearing one of the worlds most powerful being was a treat.

Just to be clear though, Theo could most certainly fund the project all by himself.

His work force worked for free.

His fabricators could turn pretty most crap into stuff that he needed.

All in all, the orbital elevator project was surprisingly cheap if Theo's group was the one making it.

Agent P was probably tasked by the government to get a piece of the pie.

P would have pushed hard for some sort of deal if Theo didn't drop Nosferatu's name.

"*sigh*.... Give me a week. I'll get it done." said Agent P in defeat.

"Good. I'll do my best to convince the Machine God." replied Theo.

"Much appreciated. But just to be clear, the Machine God is a back up plan if the worst comes to pass. You and Agent A will be the primary operatives."

Agent P signaled Agent A to proceed.

"I know you have extensive combat training and experience. You're most certainly stronger than me, even if you're missing an arm. However, our mission is espionage." Said Agent A.

Suddenly, Agent A's body morphed into a 10 year old western girl, a very old eastern grand mother, a 20-ish Alkebulan and she even took the form of Vanadis.

"Shapeshifting.... No wonder you're the infiltration specialist." said the impressed Theo.

"I can only morph into human females, but that's more than enough to get the job done." replied Agent A as she returned to her normal form. "Do you have any questions?"

"Yes. I already know the goals of the mission, but how exactly are we going to get in?"

"Ah that. I've been working undercover for the last 4 months and was able to become the new shy, busty best friend of Karen Pechenko. And as expected with the rich and famous, debauchery is inevitable. She invited me and my boyfriend to a swinger orgy party. You will be acting as my boyfriend and bodyguard."

" Ugh. I can already feel the STD."

"The orgy is 2 weeks from now. Right before their next 'peaceful protest'. I know you just woke up from a coma, but I need you to get into fighting shape by then."

"No problem."

"I'll help you out with your disguise in a later date. Right now, I need to ask you a very important question."

"Yes maam."

"Are you good at sex?"

.

.

.

.

"Er, what?"

"We're heading into an orgy. I need to know how good you are at sex so we can plan around it."

"Well... I just came recovered from a coma, so I guess my dicking skills have rusted a bit."

"Let's go to the next room. I'll test you there."

1 hour later, Agent A was face down on the floor with her eyes rolled back and her loins defilled by cursed sword Sexcalibur.

Later, Theo discovered that Juno has been violating him during his coma.

Women of the world, TREMBLE IN FEAR! The THOT slayer was polished and ready for war!