"Ahhh, that hits the spot." He set down the steaming cup, leaned back into his soft fluffy chair and closed his eyes.

Pebbles was on his fifth cup of coffee of the day. He made sure to stash it in his secret Pebbles-only hiding hole in his house, and brought it into work with him. Because he's not an idiot, unlike some people.

This was a new blend of coffee he was trying out, on the advice of everyone's mom Sandra. Bit of a cocoa flavor to it, good stuff.

He took another sip.

Yep, this was the life. Getting paid to sit around in peace and quiet. No one trying to bash his head in, no one trying to slurp his bones, no one trying to cut his penis off.

----------------------------------------

"FUCK YOU TOFU!" Buzzer screeched into Tofu's ear canal at maximum power, while running away at full speed. The use of his power was futile however; Tofu had long ago corrected the mistake of evolution that was the human hearing system. Any out of bounds frequencies merely resulted in that data not being picked up; any frequency high enough to damage Tofu's ears would have to be strong enough to damage his skull first. And Buzzer unfortunately was not yet strong enough to make heads explode.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

Not for lack of trying, however. Blood was pouring out of his own eyes and ears in buckets. Buzzer had very little to look forward to in life; he wasn't about to let Tofu take away his one (very little) bit of happiness!

Tofu being the nice kind of bioweapon made sure not to run too fast, to give Buzzer a sporting chance. And also, to not drag Zapps along the asphalt by his neck. Hey, speaking of Zapps..

The sound of a car hitting its breaks made Tofu stop and turn. Then a soft thump. Zapps was laying on the street, his body unmoving. Buzzer eventually stopped too after checking over his shoulder, and said "Oh my god."

He walked to Zapps, kneeling next to him. "Oh my god."

"Tofu.... what did you do? What did you do to Zapps?"

Tofu just held up the thirty-meter long tether that was connecting them, stuck out his tongue, and shrugged.

"YOU IDIOT! YOU CAN'T LET HIM RUN THAT FAR ON HIS OWN! YOU KNOW YOU HAVE TO KEEP HIM ON A SHORT LEASH!"