I zoomed towards the top of the Azure Peak at the other end of the Glittering Mountains for a whole day. Being immortal and practicing inedia all, I technically didn't need to eat...but ever since I'd started eating regular meals with my silly disciples Xu Yun and Li Cheng (who were mortal and needed to eat or else they would, um, die), I'd started to have a taste for food again. As I swooped through the air, balancing on Destiny Blade, I pulled a steaming red bean bao bun out of the air and munched into the fluffy cloud of dough.

Mmm...Food was good. Who said immortals weren't professional if they ate? No one! I guess I'd been telling myself that I seemed cooler and more immortal if I didn't eat and just meditated instead. But seriously, this immortal wasn't gonna avoid munching on food anymore. Who cared if it was unprofessional? Food was yummy! If only I could get a cup of instant ramen noodles around here, sigh...

Suddenly, the xianxia system's annoying voice sounded in my brain again:

The xianxia system recommends that you do not try to create instant noodles. In your previous life, you expired after choking on a cup of instant—

"Hey!" My voice was all muffled because of the wind shooting by and the red bean paste in my mouth. "Xianxia system! First off, don't mention that! It's very unprofessional! Let's pretend I died in a cooler way from now on, okay? Let's say I pushed someone out of the way of the subway and then fell down by accident...Or, no, that's not cool either, that's just clumsy. ANYWAYS! Second off, can you hear my thoughts?! I didn't say all that aloud, did I?"

The xianxia system is directly connected to your soul and can access all of your coherent verbal thoughts. This is the base setting of the xianxia system.

"WHAT?!" I choked on my bao bun and hacked up red bean paste. "You can hear—everything? What happened to privacy? Don't you know about personal space?!"

We apologize if this feature upsets you. The xianxia system is directly connected to your soul. Would you like to separate it?"

"Separate? I can separate you from me? How?! Why didn't you tell me before?! You know what? I don't care! If I can keep my thoughts to myself by separating myself from you, I'll do it! Get out of me, demon system!"

Stolen story; please report.

Understood. Would you like to confirm this decision? Separating the xianxia system from your soul will return you to your previous life.

"...But...In my previous life, I'm DEAD!"

That is correct. In your previous life, you expired after choking on a cup of—

"Okay, enough, ENOUGH! Don't disconnect. Just...give me some privacy, all right? Don't listen to my thoughts, that's weird!"

Understood. The xianxia system will mute your thoughts. Please communicate with the xianxia system from now on solely through speech.

"All right, all right. That's literally what I've been doing this whole time..."

You have reached the top of the Azure Peak. Please dismount in order to cultivate in the abandoned caves of Gū Shān Mìdòng.

I still felt mortified by the idea of the xianxia system literally hearing my every thought since I'd reincarnated into this body fifteen years ago or something like that (seriously, time just kinda turns into goopy jello when you're an immortal). It's not like I had a bunch of dirty thoughts or something...

Okay, okay, I had some dirty thoughts. Don't think anything extreme though, okay?! It's just, I was the kind of person who made a lot of dirty jokes in my last life. Only, I couldn't really say those out loud here because no one would get them. Also I didn't really have friends at the Jade Heaven Sect to tell jokes to. So, I just said them in my head and laughed at my own amazing humor.

But you can see why I'd be annoyed that the xianxia system heard all of that, right?! If the system could just hear all my thoughts, then why didn't it speak up sooner? Seriously, I needed to have a good feedback talk with whoever made this thing. Was there a form? A survey? A one-on-one beta user feedback session?! Anything?!?!

I swooped down towards the glittering blue peak below that was spotted with snow. Grumbling, I hopped off Destiny Blade and landed lightly on the ground, stowing my sword away and approaching the big, sapphire blue mouth of the Caves of Gū Shān Mìdòng in front of me.

I was just about to snap at the stupid xianxia system again when a weird shiver went through my whole body—you know, those ones that kind of shake you out of nowhere and wriggle from your head to your toes. My body felt lighter all of a sudden, and the air was thick with some kind of smell I'd never smelled before:

Mystic energy and concentrated qi.

"Wow," I breathed. "This level of concentrated qi, and I'm not even inside the cave yet...This is...amazing."

I stepped towards the cave. With this amount of dormant qi and mystic energy hanging around, and no interruptions...who knew how much I could improve?

This immortal was about to get a whole lot more immortal from here on out!