Here’s what happened:

I was watching TV. It was a danmei adaptation that I’d watched a million times, but don’t come at me, ok?! It was a comfort show! Like always, I had a bowl of instant noodles on my lap and was slurping them up.

As I was doing this totally normal thing, I suddenly — choked!

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Choked on my instant noodles! How stupid is that?

I choked, and choked, and choked — and I fell over and died.

And then I woke up next to a river in another person’s body, in a cultivation world.

This is the story of my life as an immortal cultivator. After choking on a cup of instant noodles.

So, yeah. Welcome. Have fun, whatever. Don’t eat a cup of instant noodles. Ever.