I gasped dramatically. "Revealed yourself?" I shrieked, holding a hand to my head as if I was going to faint. Not sure what is was about this here Xiangshi, but somehow being around an immortal who was thousands of years older than I was...really made me feel like I could try out a new poser look. A dramatic, emotional immortal moved by stories of pain! Of course, if we came across any mortals, I'd have to go back to fanning myself and holding my hands behind my back, hehe.
Xiangshi did not seem impressed. She curled her red lips at me and crossed her arms, looking me over like I was a piece of rotten meat on her shoe! Jeez! She didn't have to look THAT disgusted! My acting confidence needed to be nurtured, not obliterated!!!
"Yes," She snapped. "Revealed myself. I revealed myself to my father. On my birth date, I came before him in his throne room, or the Heavenly Jokestor Lounge and Mojo Dojo Casa House, as he calls it." Xiangshi got a sour look. Woah, and I'd thought she couldn't look any more disgusted. "I stood before everyone: my brothers, my few sisters who were permitted to tend to the hall and my brothers, my father, each and every one of his servants and advisors..."
I could see the scene playing out in my mind's eye while Xiangshi spoke.
______
Xiangshi, dressed and disguised as a young, clearly beautiful immortal spirit in scholars' robes, stood outside of two tall wooden doors of a dark ebony. There were, weirdly, cowboys and horses carved onto the doors, along with what looked likepeople slipping on banana peels. It was not very A - PEEL - ing, if you know what I mean.
EHEHEHHEHEHEHEHHE. EHEHEHHEHEHEHHEHE. I'm the funniest immortal there ever was, hah. No one can beat me in that category.
Anyways, a young, male-dsiguised Xiangshi stood outside the doors. One guard stood on either side of the doors. The were dressed in bizzare armor of red and green and yellow colors, with white paint on their faces like a clown. What's more, their guan daos were FLOPPY! How were you supposed to be a guard and stab people if your weapon's a floppy piece of rubber?! I guess you could smack people with it really hard, but still...
Xiangshi took a deep breath.
The doors opened.
Surprisingly, they opened smoothly, without intense squeaking or circus music playing. From inside there came the sound of a flowing, mesmerizing pipa. It was the kind of music you'd hear at a pleasure house. I've never been, but you can just tell from the music vibes sometime, you know?
Inside was a long and tall hall that stretched far back. Interspersed throughout were clouds, random statues of horses, and many portraits of Liu Chenyang, the man himself. he was rather ugly, tbh. White chin beard, sour eyes and frowning lips. There were all kinds of paintings of him, from regal to absolutely freaking ridiculous. Like, why was there a painting of him, but as a horse except with a humanoid head?! And what was that one, a painting of him outside a toilet giving a thumbs-up??? HUH??? (Maybe he'd been so incredibly constipated at one point that it merited a thumbs-up to poop, I don't know).
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In the hall, underneath the sweet, smooth pipa music, there was much chatter. One booming voice stood out among the rest. It was laughing and shouting with glee.
The voice was Liu Chenyang's.
Down at the waaaaay, waaaaaay, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIMTIREDOFSAYINGWAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAY end of the hall, was an enormous red throne with golden engravings of horses gilding it. An on that thronw, surrounded by advisors and sons standing at attention, lounging lazily while being tickled and swooned over by over a dozen courtesans, was the man himself. The ugly, ugly, nasty, nasty trickster god, Liu Chenyang.
Slowly, Xiangshi approached. Each of her footsteps was deliberate and entirely calm. They tapped in a rythmn, growing closer and closer to the throne of the one person she wanted to prove herself to. Why? She wasn't sure. But she had to. She needed to earn his approval, as her true self.
As Xiangshi grew closer, conversation quieted down as people noticed her and the seriousness of her approach. The last noise to die down was the grating sound of Liu Chenyang's booming laugh as he pinched a courtesan's cheek, before finally noticing his daughter--or son, so he thought--that was kneeling at the foot of his throne.
Liu Chenyang cleared his throat, looking surprised. "You...ah...ahem. Who is this?" He whispered to his nearest advisor, who mouthed something back.
"Oh ho ho! My little Shu--I mean, Shi! Shi-er! What brings you here today in such an...erm, formal manner? Has my son come to report something?"
With her head still bowed, Xiangshi answered, her tone lowered to sound plausibly like a man's, but still smooth as ice: "Father, I come bearing good news. I have secured the coveted cultivation territory of Gū Shān Mìdòng under your name. I made arrangements with the spirits of the mountains, and they have released their territory to you."
Liu Chenyang gaped, as did many of his advisors. The Gū Shān Mìdòng territory? The coveted area with such rich spiritual energies that it was said to ascend gods to the third heaven? The mountainside caves with riches to rival those of the Heavenly Emperor? The caverns said to house beasts more ancient than the gods themselves?!?!?!?!?
Suddenly, the court erupted into cheering. Advisors cheered; other sons reluctantly and jealously cheered for their brother's accomplishment; even the courtesans, though confused, clapped and laughed. Liu Chenyang laughed boomingly along, slapping his knees and beaming.
"My son has secured the Gū Shān Mìdòng caves for his father! This is a true cause for celebration! Bring the rice wine! The best almond pastries! The fattest roat pig! Let us celebrate tonight, my honorable son, Xiangshi, son of the god of tricksters!"
"Wait."
Everyone froze. Xiangshi had risen. She stood now with her face looking down, fists clenched gently at her sides. "There is something more to announce."
Liu Chenyang laughed in delight, looking at his advisors excitedly, and they nodded back witht he same excitement. What other great achievement had this son of the god's accomplished? Something even greater, for sure, to be mentioned after the obtainment of the caves of Gū Shān Mìdòng!
Xiangshi breathed in slowly, then exhaled. She raised a hand...and slowly, to shrieks and gasps and silence all around, her robes morphed, and the shape of her body shifted, and her hair flowed down, her face softening. She looked up with phoenix eyes, face calm.
"I am no son. I am a daughter."