~~~

‘I don’t … … … … believe it,’ shouted Wu Dog Yan.

Sitting with one leg hanging out of the helicopter was a very smug-looking Chi Hua Bi Bi. She took a moment to survey the whole scene, the three animals surrounded by a strange purple mist, with its two black holes rotating to look at her.

‘… … … … …?’ she shouted.

‘Mist is evil. Throw … … … rope,’ shouted Wu Dog Yan.

‘… … … ladder,’ added Cha Cha.

Chi Hua Bi Bi looked at the mist again, and noticed that it was moving towards her. She reached inside the helicopter and came back out holding a microphone.

‘Oh for … … …sake,’ said Wu Dog Yan.

Chi Hua Bi Bi cleared her throat then put the microphone to her lips. ‘What the hell is going on here?’

‘Mist … … … help … …’ shouted Wu Dog Yan.

‘What’s with all this mist? Why is it so purple?’

‘… … … rope… … … stupid microphone … … … now,’ Wu Dog Yan tried again, cupping her paws to her mouth, but it still didn’t get through.

‘Actually, why are you even on this island? I looked online and it said Dog Hood bought a castle here and…now there’s mist everywhere…but no Dog Hood…’ Chi Hua Bi Bi paused and looked beyond the mist, towards the castle. ‘Wait…is this a trick? Are you filming something?’

She allowed a moment for someone to answer, or for the secret camera crew to reveal themselves, but the only thing that happened was a small hamster running out of the purple mist, smoke coming off his very burnt fur.

‘What the…’ Chi Hua Bi Bi lowered the microphone and gawped at Luco, who was rolling around on the grass like a Colombian footballer.[1]

Wu Dog Yan turned to Zade and gave him a look that said, you’re a tiger, stop standing around like a librarian and shout something. Zade seemed a little reluctant, rubbing his nose a few times before looking up at the helicopter, opening his mouth and shouting as loud as he could, ‘the mist is trying to kill us, drop a ladder, help us.’

Chi Hua Bi Bi looked at Luco one more time, then at the mist creeping up towards the bottom of the helicopter. There was a chance it was just a weird kind of weather, but weird weather is what cave dogs used to call lightning right before being struck by it. Better safe than toast. She threw the microphone into the helicopter, pulled out a rope ladder and unrolled it over the side. It dropped almost as far as the grass, enough for Wu Dog Yan to grab hold of it.

‘Zade…you and Luco go first…’

Zade grabbed Luco, but he was too weak to go over the shoulder without falling off, so Zade bit into his little jacket and started to climb the ladder.

The helicopter rocked to one side due to the immense weight of a tiger hanging onto it, but the pilot managed to adjust after a few more wobbles. When Zade reached the top, Chi Hua Bi Bi told him to lose

weight and practise climbing faster.

‘Sorry?’

‘Stop complaining, cog, and get in already,’ Chi Hua Bi Bi said, pushing him aside and calling for Wu Dog Yan to hurry up.

Wu Dog Yan looked back at the mist, saw it was only a metre away, grabbed Cha Cha and practically threw her upwards onto the ladder. Luckily, the little dog was conscious enough to grip the rung and start climbing, swiftly followed by Wu Dog Yan.

‘Faster…’ shouted Wu Dog Yan and Chi Hua Bi Bi at the same time.

Cha Cha went faster, refusing to look down. If the mist caught up with her, so be it, but if she looked down and it was close, she knew there was a chance it’d paralyse her and then both her and Dog Yan would be goners.

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A few more seconds and she was being pulled into the helicopter by Chi Hua Bi Bi. There was no friendliness in her eyes, in fact, she looked disgusted even when she picked up Cha Cha and threw her next to Zade. Had she never touched a worker before?

‘Give me that paper…’ Chi Hua Bi Bi shouted to Cha Cha, who blinked in surprise.

‘What?’

‘The paper, next to your leg, give it to me.’

Cha Cha looked down at her feet and saw a piece of paper with some writing on it. She picked it up and read the first line…

‘This contract is a valid legal agreement between Chi Hua Bi Bi and Wu Dog Yan to…’

‘Give it to me, now.’

Cha Cha jumped at the ferocity in the voice and quickly handed the paper over.

‘Now, sit in silence and don’t pollute my helicopter.’

‘Err…okay.’

Chi Hua Bi Bi turned back to the ladder, took a pen from her coat pocket and dangled the paper in front of Wu Dog Yan, who was trying to reach up and grab the edge of the helicopter.

‘What are you doing?’

‘Sign this paper and I’ll let you in.’

‘What?’

‘Sign it.’

‘Let me in, the mist is right behind.’

‘Sign it first.’

‘I’m not signing anything, let me in…’

‘Sign it.’

Wu Dog Yan growled and tried to reach up to the helicopter, but Chi Hua Bi Bi swatted her paw away.

‘Sign it.’

‘This is madness…’

‘Sign it.’

‘The mist…’

‘Sign it.’

‘…it’s on my feet.’

Chi Hua Bi Bi shook the paper as if that would make it more persuasive. ‘Sign it.’

‘Stop saying sign it!’

The sound of Wu Dog Yan’s voice turned into a scream as the mist finally did what it had threatened to do and wrapped around her feet, then her ankles, then her calves…

The loudness of the scream finally overpowered the sound of the helicopter blades, forcing its way into Zade’s ears. He moved forward, saw the paper in Chi Hua Bi Bi’s paw, saw her swatting away Wu Dog Yan’s paw from the helicopter, growled and reached down for his friend’s arm.

Chi Hua Bi Bi turned sharply and tried to shove whoever it was that was interfering in her plan backwards, but as soon as she saw Zade, her arm dropped.

Zade shoved her out of the way, causing her to fly against the window on the other side, and then pulled Wu Dog Yan up and out of the mist.

‘Are you okay?’ he asked.

‘Close the door,’ she barked.

He did as he was told then told the helicopter to get moving, get them out of there. The pilot checked behind for Chi Hua Bi Bi, but she was too busy rubbing her head.

‘Go, go, go, go…’ Wu Dog Yan shouted.

The pilot shrugged and went, went, went, went.

The helicopter rose higher into the air, the mist following for about twenty metres before hitting an invisible ceiling and stopping. Luco looked through the window to see if it would try again, but it didn’t, it just sank back down to ground level.

‘It’s fading…’ said Cha Cha, appearing next to him.

‘Seems like it.’

‘Must be attached to the island somehow,’ said Wu Dog Yan, who was slumped on the back seat, rubbing her legs.

‘Or the castle…’

‘Ka.’

Zade picked up the paper that Chi Hua Bi Bi had been waving around and tried to read it. After managing the first two lines, he hit a sentence that was really hard and handed it to Wu Dog Yan instead.

‘What does it say?’ she asked.

‘Nuut kaata. Legal speak.’

She scrutinised it for a minute, hissing at several points before scrunching it up and throwing it at Chi Hua Bi Bi.

‘What?’

‘You tried to blackmail me…’

‘You would’ve done the same, if you were me…’

‘I’m not you.’

‘What was it?’ asked Cha Cha, shuffling over to Wu Dog Yan, holding out her paw next to her leg then pulling it back again when she saw Wu Dog Yan’s worried expression.

‘She tried to take one of my factories.’

‘A small one…’ said Chi Hua Bi Bi.

‘That’s terrible…’ said Cha Cha.

‘It is pretty low…’ added Zade.

‘Don’t exaggerate, it was a small one, I just told you. She’s got a hundred others…’

‘Twenty-seven actually.’

‘Close to a hundred.’

Wu Dog Yan looked at the scrunched-up ball that was the contract. She stopped rubbing her leg, laughed and then called Chi Hua Bi Bi a parasite.

‘A parasite that just rescued you…’

‘You must’ve had the contract with you all this time. Carrying it around, waiting for a moment when I was in trouble so you could force me to sign it. That’s why you’ve been following me everywhere recently.’

Chi Hua Bi Bi coughed and repeated, ‘I still rescued you.’

‘How could you do that?’ asked Cha Cha, jabbing a paw in Chi Hua Bi Bi’s direction.

‘Don’t use that voice with me, cog…’

‘She’s your friend, your co-star and you tried to…’

Cha Cha’s rant was stopped from going full flow by a tapping noise against the helicopter window. All the animals looked and saw it was Luco, tapping and jumping up and down, shouting, ‘down there, down there, go, go, go…’

‘What’s down there?’

Zade peered out the window and saw what Luco was so excited about. About a hundred feet below, visible through moonlit gaps in the heavy mist [plus the faint spread of the helicopter lights], was Dog Lee’s boat. It was moving slowly, circling around Ratko’s Jump like a hired thug waiting for the worker’s union rep to cut through Dōn Lak Park at two in the morning.

‘I don’t believe it…’ said Wu Dog Yan.

But that was a lie. She did believe it. They all did, because after you’ve seen sentient cat-eating mist, nothing is impossible. And, thinking about it, a boat they saw leave not even an hour ago appearing below wasn’t that much of a stretch.

~~~

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[1] If this ever gets sold in Colombia, use ‘Brazilian footballer’ instead. Or Ashley Young.