~~~

The following morning, Zade, Luco and Cha Cha sat on the DTR train to Knife Factory 7, slipping in and out of sleep. It was only a twenty-five minute journey but they were so exhausted from the night before that they didn’t even have the energy to look at their phones and catch up on the morning news.

Didn’t matter much as the TV screen on the train told them everything they already knew; about Dog Hood’s school blowing up, the brawl in the Sha Lau [which the reporter tried to pin on Lo Cat Gah and Dog Hood], and the general cluelessness of the police. Apparently, some officers had trashed an abandoned military barracks out at Port Lōn the night before looking for Dog Lee and, after discovering nothing but startled homeless dogs, pretended it was a training exercise. The media did add one fresh thing though, an ambush interview with Dog Hood – one bold reporter jumping out of a bush behind Dog Hood’s home and shoving a microphone in his face – where the kung fu maverick said he had no idea why his school had exploded, but due to stress and self-advice, he was taking a few days off to reflect on things. The reporter tried to ask him a follow-up question, but Dog Hood had already drowned her out with the revving of his motorbike engine.

The best reaction any of the three amateur detectives could manage to this news was Luco saying, ‘bah, guilty,’ before breaking into a seven second yawn.

Apparently, nothing else needed to be said.

Or they were too tired to say it.

Either way, the Dog Hood explosion didn’t stick around long. After they’d got off the train and exited the station, one of their co-workers ran up suddenly and told them to brace themselves, someone legendary was at the factory, a genuine superstar talking to the big boss about something.

‘Wu Dog Yan?’ asked Luco, his eyebrows raised.

‘Shut up. How did you know that?’

‘You used the words legendary and superstar,’ replied Cha Cha, shrugging.

‘Wah, you’re like those fortune tellers over in Pak To!’

‘Ka, that’s us,’ agreed Luco, moving his paws like a low-rent magician.

‘Would you like us to read your palm?’ asked Cha Cha, smirking.

‘Only if it’s free. And you tell me Wu Dog Yan is my future wife. And Chi Hua Bi Bi my mistress.’

‘Pervert.’

‘Nothing’s free,’ added Luco, holding out a flat palm.

‘Huh? I thought you were all about workers unite and build the unions and all that stuff?’

‘That’s her thing.’ Luco used his elbow to point at Cha Cha, accidentally clipping her. ‘Or it used to be. Now it’s acting apparently.’

‘Hey, I’m helping you with the Dog Lee thing,’ barked back Cha Cha, almost growling in irritation. ‘And Boss Bamdak hasn’t done anything sinister for a while so I’m on revolutionary vacation.’

‘What about that police complaint you were gonna make?’

Cha Cha looked confused for a moment then did an ahhh, that thing expression.

‘She’s not doing that now,’ said Zade, jumping in before she could respond.

‘Whatever,’ said the co-worker, clearly getting bored. ‘You pokkahs walk too slow, I’m going ahead to catch Wu Dog Yan before she gets out of the office.’

‘She won’t look at you,’ answered Cha Cha, staring at the fur poking out of her comrade’s ear.

‘Ka, we’ll see.’

‘How long has she been in there?’ asked Zade, but it was too late, the co-worker had already started jogging ahead.

The three heroes continued along the narrow alleys slotted between the knife factories. Geographically, it was quite a large industrial site, but in reality, all the factories were incredibly close to each other, and, in the alleys between, there were all kinds of small shops and bars for the workers to disappear inside after work. Actually, this was something Cha Cha had complained about before, the way some of these small shops misled and cheated the workers. The most common scam was to get some young, pretty model dogs to stand outside and invite the new worker dogs into a bar for a free drink. Then, when their prey was inside, a large dog, or polar bear, or sometimes a tiger would walk in behind and block them from leaving when they discovered that the free drink was actually more expensive than a bottle of gold label honey wine.

Luckily for the three amateur detectives it was still early and the tricks only really started after working hours, so they made their way peacefully through the alleys until they reached a huge crowd of worker dogs standing outside the front [VIP] entrance to Knife Factory 7.

‘What’s going on now?’ asked Zade, scanning the front of the crowd.

‘They’re waiting for her to come out,’ replied Luco.

‘Nuut…’ whispered Cha Cha, trying to push aside a larger dog in front.

‘They’re on strike?’

‘Nuut, she’s already out. Look!’

Cha Cha pointed towards the group of dogs ahead of them, but when Zade and Luco followed her finger all they could see was…a group of dogs.

‘I don’t see anything,’ said Zade, frowning.

‘Look through the gaps,’ said Cha Cha, already walking forward. ‘Or over their heads. You’re big enough.’

Zade squinted through shoulder gaps and still couldn’t see anything except worker dogs, so he strode forward until he was close enough to see over all their heads.

‘Ahh…’

‘What is it?’ asked Luco, trying to jump up to see. ‘Wu Dog Yan?’

Zade bent down and, with feigned effort, picked up his hamster friend, putting him on his shoulder. ‘Ah, it is her, she’s out already.’

If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.

‘I wonder if she was successful.’

‘She’s getting in her car, but there’s no room to get out, it’s too-…wah, they’re not moving at all. What is this?’

‘We should wait over here,’ said Zade, pointing to a less crowded space nearby.

‘Nuut, you need to get in there Zade, clear the crowd…’

‘Nuut.’

‘Go on, they’ll move for you, you’re massive.’

‘I don’t want any trouble.’

‘It’s not trouble, it’s-…’ Luco paused, seeing something up ahead and smirking. ‘Wah, that was fast.’

‘What?’

‘Cha Cha somehow got through…and now she’s in the car with Wu Dog Yan. Okay, good, she’s waving at us to come over. Go, go, go, move!’

‘Through the crowd?’

‘Nuut, dig a tunnel and come up through the car engine. Of course, through the crowd. Don’t be so timid, Zade, just bulldoze all these idiots out of the way.’

‘I don’t want to hurt anyone.’

‘Don’t then.’

‘But I’m too big, I’ll injure them accidentally.’

‘Stop moaning and get over there. Clearly Wu Dog Yan got us the day off work, so we need to stop messing around and get over to Lo Gau Harbour. Dog Lee’s life may depend on us!’

‘Okay…I’ll try.’

Zade walked forward, reaching the first dog on the outside ring of the huge crowd and tapping him on the shoulder. The dog turned around and told him to go away, but not in a nice way.

‘What are you doing?’ asked Luco, annoyed.

‘I’m trying to get him to move a little bit.’

Zade moved to the side and tried tapping another dog on the shoulder then asking politely if he could get through. This dog, who was the same breed and colour as Git Git, turned and told Zade to back off or he’d put his fist through his brain.

‘I’ll try going farther along,’ said Zade, looking left to the side of the crowd.

‘Nuut, nuut, nuut…stop tapping like a monk and push through.’

‘It’s too dangerous…’

‘Dangerous? They’ll fall like water biscuits. Seriously, come on, start pushing.’ Luco tried nudging Zade in the back of the neck, but it didn’t have any effect. ‘Start faster, move.’

‘I’m not pushing anyone, Luco.’

‘Do it, go.’

‘Nuut.’

‘It’s easy, just do what you did yesterday, the leopard thing in Sha Lau…’

‘I can’t.’

‘Of course, you can, go.’

‘It’s work, I can’t.’

‘Don’t make excuses, it’s outside the factories…completely different thing.’

‘Luco, I’m not pushing anyone.

‘Fine, then we’ll be stuck here all year.’

‘It’s not in my nature.’

‘Nature? You’re a tiger, Ninsōn. You wouldn’t hesitate if these guys were all a bunch of other tigers, would you?’

‘That’s different.’

‘You’d be right through there, but because it’s a load of dogs you’re as passive as a Half Moon Beach turtle. What’s wrong with you? My Satfu is probably being tortured in some cliff shack on No Name Islands and you’re-…’ Luco paused, looking over the crowd again. ‘Ah, you lucky turtle cheat. They’ve found a way through.’

‘They’re coming?’

‘Ka.’

The worker dogs in front parted to the left and right and Wu Dog Yan drove casually through with her almost as good as new, honey-yellow car [almost perfect, because there was still the slight dent from the parking incident the night before].

‘Stop standing there like vegetables and hop in,’ said Cha Cha, leaning over the passenger side and beckoning them over.

‘It’s cleared with Boss Lak?’ asked Zade, bending down so Luco could jump down from his shoulder and onto the back seat.

‘Not just cleared, super cleared!’

‘Huh?’

‘She skipped Boss Lak and went straight to Boss Bamdak.’

Both Zade and Luco offered pretty much the same expression as a fish in a supermarket tank.

‘I managed to get you the next three days off,’ said Wu Dog Yan, swatting one of the worker dogs away as he tried to grab a chunk of her hair.

‘That’s impossible,’ muttered Zade, opening the door and getting in. ‘How did you do that?’

‘It didn’t take much. I just said I’d go for dinner with him next week, somewhere without candles.’

‘Oh nuut.’

‘It’s no problem, just one dinner.’

‘But…he’s not a very…patient dog.’

Wu Dog Yan laughed and nudged Cha Cha, who leaned back to Zade and said, ‘she won’t be the only one at the dinner.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘We’re coming too.’

‘Boss Bamdak agreed to that?’

‘Nuut.’

‘He didn’t say how many could come to the dinner. Which was a bit surprising actually. Usually these rich business dogs are ruthless when it comes to contracts and arrangements. They never miss a thing.’

‘He won’t be very happy when he sees us there.’

‘Who cares? She’s Wu Dog Yan, legend of DogTV. He’s the dog who tried to make pregnant workers give birth in the factory toilets then go straight back to work.’

‘Wah, he really tried to do that?’ asked Wu Dog Yan, sunglasses slipping down her nose.

‘Three times.’

‘I never heard about it.’

‘Of course not. The media didn’t cover it. They never cover anything about actual working-class dogs.’

Wu Dog Yan didn’t reply. Instead, she swatted another dog off her wing mirror, beeped the horn a few times and then drove forward towards the main road that would take them out of the factory site.

‘Nuut kaata,’ said Zade, looking back and seeing Boss Bamdak looking out of his office window on the seventh floor.

‘It’s okay, Zade. He got beat, outmaneuvred, and there’s nothing he can do about it.’

‘Ka, beat like Dog Hood’s gonna get beat when I catch up to him,’ said Luco, leaning forward and tapping Wu Dog Yan on the shoulder. ‘Can’t you go any faster?’

‘Not unless you want the police to stop us.’

‘They won’t stop you, you’re Wu Dog Yan.’

‘Please don’t go faster,’ said Zade, shrinking down slightly into the back seat.

‘Quiet turtle face,’ said Luco. ‘We need to get there faster so we can catch the ferry early.’

Wu Dog Yan looked confused. ‘There is no ferry.’

‘What?’

‘Have you never been to No Name Islands?’

‘Nuut, but…they’re islands, how can there be no ferry?’

‘Luco, you’re such a tourist,’ said Cha Cha, waving at two comrades gawping at them from the DTR exit. ‘The ferries only go to the other islands, the popular ones. To get to any of the No Name Islands you have to hire one of those aunty dogs on the rowboats.’

‘Rowboats? We’ll take years to get there…’

‘Nuut, they’re not actually-…’

‘…centuries if the aunty’s really old.’

‘Calm down, Luco,’ cut in Wu Dog Yan thorugh the rear-view mirror. ‘They have engines, they just look a bit like rowboats. And the aunties go quite fast so…if it’s speed you want…’

‘Fine, whatever. As long as they get us to Dog Hood’s island on time.’

‘No problem on that front. Barring traffic, we should be there by midday.’

‘Good.’

‘Now can you sit down?’

‘Ka. But only cos you called me Luco.’

‘Thank you.’

Wu Dog Yan stepped on the gas a little, and everyone fell silent. To stop it from feeling too awkward she connected her phone to the car system and played some 80’s dog music. ‘Shout it to the very top’ by The Style Kennel was the first song up and got such a muted reaction that Wu Dog Yan decided to put it on loop for the first half hour. Cha Cha nodded along, Luco stared out of the window and Zade slouched down in his seat so no police would notice him on the way out of Dogholm.

Pretty soon they were heading past Ana Ker Estate, past the old government hill, past the lunatics walking from the suburbs into the city centre and, finally, past the sign covered in bird shit [and other shit] that said Welcome to Dogholm, Stay For A Short While.

‘We’re definitely going the right way, right?’ asked Luco, looking off towards the stretches of wheat at the side.

‘Ka.’

‘The train line goes off the other way, with the fields…’

‘So?’

‘Shouldn’t we be following that?’

‘If we want to go to places with no roads, ka.’

Luco didn’t look convinced.

‘Trust her,’ said Cha Cha leaning back over the passenger seat, ‘she’s probably been to Lo Gau Harbour countless times. She knows the way.’

Wu Dog Yan laughed. ‘Actually, I’m just following the signs.’

‘That’s even better,’ corrected Cha Cha quickly.

‘Eh? How?’ asked Luco, leaning forward to his flatmate’s shoulder.

‘She’s humble enough to follow signs,’ replied Cha Cha, flicking at Luco’s nose, ‘instead of stubbornly insisting on her own memory.’

Wu Dog Yan bit her bottom lip in a mix of confusion and embarrassment, and she wasn’t the only one.

‘No way you’re gonna grave jump[1] from that one,’ Luco whispered into Cha Cha’s ear, then pulling back to avoid another flick of the paw.

‘Shut up, pokkah.’

‘It was a really bad line.’

‘Shut. Up.’

‘Really, really bad.’

Cha Cha glared through the wing mirror, then shifted eyes to the lock on the back door. Then turned to Wu Dog Yan and asked in a blank, matter-of-fact tone, ‘have you ever seen a hamster fly out of a car?’

Wu Dog Yan reached forward, pressing some buttons on her phone. ‘Louder music might help.’

‘Hmm. How about both?’

~~~

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[1] Hamster slang for recover/make a comeback