I recently became six years old and today is the first day I'm going to school.
"Brother! Hurry up, we are gonna be late on our first day and Aline is waiting for us." (Janna)
"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming. Calm down." (Me)
'GOD SHE IS SO CUTE! LOOK AT HER! ALL EXCITED AND SHIT FOR HER FIRST DAY AT SCHOOL! If someone just makes a single move on her, I swear to Christ, I will make him a woman. I will snap off his-.'
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I GOT IT! DUDE! YOU'RE GETTING MORE PROTECTIVE BY THE DAY!
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I descend down the stairs and a beaming smile from my sister welcomes me.
'There better be no bullies at school. If there is just a sign that my little Janna is getting bullied, I will massacre even grade schoolers. I don't even give a damn.
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You know at first I was all the way with your little Imouto-love, but slowly I'm thinking it's more an obsession...
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'Yeah I know... I ain't gonna change that tho...
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Didn't want you to. I love her just as much as you do. (─‿‿─)
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'If you were a person, you would be dead by now.'
We leave the house and meet the waiting Aline.
"Why are you so slow? I nearly left without you!" (Aline)
"Sorry, I had to prepare something. I forgot to pack it yesterday because I was so nervous." (Me)
'I wasn't nervous at all, but sometimes you have to show a little bit of weakness, so you don't look invincible.'
"Hmpf, so even the Mr. Perfect gets nervous sometimes. What a surprise." (Aline)
"Come on guys, stop quarreling and let's go." (Janna)
I only smile wryly while my little sister wants to make peace again.
'Just as planned hehehehehehe'
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We arrive at school. It 's just a building in the center of the village and doesn't look all that special. The moment we arrive the elder, who we met before, starts calling the kids into class.
'So he will be the teacher, huh? No wonder, it's the environment with the most kids.'
While wondering how he got that position, although he looks like a pedophile, first class started.
'Alright, I have to make an impression of already knowing everything. God what a pain... if you wouldn't remind me why I'm doing all this, then I probably would already have given up screeny.'
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I will encourage you Brotha. We will both reach the Good Ending and conquer the Heart of the tsundere.
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'You're my only ally, screeny *sob*'
I give it my best in lessons and solve everything with ease, but it's still a pain to do anything.
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It's finally break time and I enjoy my meal with my little sister and Aline. I notice a girl with brown twintails approaching me.
'Alright. Face 7/10, Cuteness 7/10, Potential 6/10. Not my type.'
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I would rate Face 6,5/10, Cuteness 6/10, Potential 5/10. Not my type either.
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'Damn, you are pretty harsh, you know that? They are still children.'
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I don't give a shit. Heroines have to be rated harshly, or else they will be half-assed Characters without real meaning.
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'You've got a point.'
"Hey Yu." (Lisa)
Yeah, that's right. I remembered the name of every girl in this whole damn village.
"Oh, hey Lisa. What is it?" (Me)
I throw a charming smile at Lisa, who looks at me with a shy expression.
'You can act all cute you want, you ain't gonna be a Heroine. I only take the relevant and interesting characters.'
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"You seemed like you understood everything in class, so I wanted to ask you something. Could you help me a little?" (Lisa)
"Oh, yeah sure. I would be glad to help." (Me)
'If I didn't know that I would be just acting, I would commit suicide a second time. I can't stand being like one of those real people *gag*.'
At the moment I answered her request with a "Yes", suddenly the rest of the class' girls started to swarm me with their own requests. I look at Aline and see how she looks at me with a hateful gaze.
"As popular as ever I see, Mr. Perfect. Hmpf" (Aline)
'Success.'
I answer every question of the girls who seek my help with a blushing face. Half of those girls weren't even having a real problem, they just wanted to have an excuse for talking with me.
'BEGONE THOTS! YOU SHALLN'T BE ONE OF THE HEROINES WITH YOUR EASY PERSONALITY!'
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Thots are the trash of women. -Screeny, Date unknown
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'What, you are a philosopher as well? What wise words, I have to admit.'
The schoolday ended with me becoming the most popular in class.
'Endure, me. Don't get swallowed by the abyss. If you turn into one of the real people once, you can never turn back.'
I call my sister and Aline, so that we can return home. Suddenly a kid with a big stature starts approaching me from behind.
'Oh? Is it gonna be one of those scenarios where someone gets jealous and wants to bully me? This is gonna be fun.'
I try to to hide my devilish grin and start to prepare. The moment the kid wants to push me I bend over.
"Oh, what's this?" (Me)
I act like I found someting on the ground. The kid trips and falls on the floor as a result of it.
'Njehehehehehehe, Ai am se devil'
"Are you alright? Do you need help?" (Me)
I reach out to the kid and he slaps me hand away. He stands up with a scornful look on his face.
"I am Ben, bow down and apologize! I may forgive you for shaming me!" (Ben)
Slowly a crowd starts to gather around us.
'You done fucked up boy.'
"Why? What have I done?" (Me)
I act as innocent as I can, so that the crowd would be on my side.
"You acted arrogantly the whole day , just because you are a little bit smarter! And now bow down, or else don't blame me for getting violent!" (Ben)
'I shouldn't blame you? What the fuck? I bet if he could see his own status, his INT stat would still look like that of an infant.'
I see my little sister inside of the crowd with a worried expression.
'OH BOY, YOU MADE MY LITTLE SITER WORRY. NOT EVEN GOD CAN HELP YOU NOW!'
Seeing that I don't bow down, the kid runs towards me.
"I told you I would get violent!" (Ben)
'Pff, ridiculous.'
I dodge his pathetic attempt of an approach and get behind him by pulling his arm past me.
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FINISH HIM!!!
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"DIVINE BUTT-DIVIDER!" (Me)
I reach out to his pants and get a grip on his underwear. I pull it up as much as I can and put the rear end over his head.
The crowd starts to break out into laughter. What they didn''t know is, I literally fried his balls. The moment I pulled up his pants, I used magic to send and electric shock to his testicles and fried them like they were my breakfast.
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FATALITY!!! If I ever get a body, remember me not to fuck with your sister...
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'YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE MADE MY LITTLE SISTER WORRY!'
The only reason the crowd couldn't hear him screaming, was because the kid already passed out.
We returned home and another day ended.
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It turned nighttime and I prepare to go hunting again.
'Status'
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STATUS
STATS
Level: 34 Statpoints: 34
HP: 24 MP: 5628 HP REGEN: 0.08/sec MP REGEN: 0.32/sec
STR: 16 DEX: 102 END: 8 INT: 27 WIS: 32 CHR: 21 LCK: 30
ABILITIES
ACTIVE: Space of distorted Time; Lightning step (shortcut: clap); Raygun (shortcut: pointed finger); Enhance (shortcut: slap desired part of body); Lightning clad (shortcut: touch both shoulders diagonally) ; Blink (shortcut: flick); Heal (shortcut: Touch target with pinky and thumb); Search life; Embed Lightning (shortcut: tap weapon of choice twice); Connect Lightning (shortcut: lock fingers)
PASSIVE: Perfect Body control; Extreme Magic potential (Gift from God); Perfect language comprehension; Inventory; Shortcut; Twin Dagger Mastery (42%); Throwing knives Mastery (86%)
AFFINITIES: Lightning (99,99%); Life (10,25%)
TITLES
"The one who made God vomit"
"You're fucking ridiculous"
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'I just can't get past that damn bottleneck... I bet the last requirement for the God of Lightning are 100% in Lightning affinity. But I can try as much as I want, I just can't get past it... screeny, got some advice?'
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Of course I do, I already wondered what you were doing all the time, uselessly training the Lightning Element...
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'You are shitting me right now aren't you?'
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Nah, I really know how to get past the treshold.
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'You know, someday I will be the ruler of this world. The first thing I will do, is making a religion under your name.'
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Oh you... you're flattering me again. WAIT NO, I AM NOT BLUSHING! I AM NOT A HEROINE!
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'Yeah, alright, we get it. NOW TELL ME THE WAY OF GETTING PAST THAT BOTTLENECK!'
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Well, you just need some legendary artifact which is filled with the Element you want. It's really that simple.
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'...'
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(。◕‿‿◕。)
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'Couldn't you just have told me that it's nearly impossible?'
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I could have... COULD
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'You are a fucking twat sometimes, you know that right?'
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Right back at you ☜(˚▽˚)☞
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I make my way to the forest again, in search for an enemy. Well somewhere I have to vent the frustration, don't I?
Routinely I activate "Search Life" and search my surroundings in a 500 meter radius.
'Hm? What's that?'
While searching the forest, I detected an unusual signal, which can't be from a monster.
'Let's check it out.'
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You are aware that that was either a flag which says that you will find somehing amazing or it could be life threatening, right?
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'Ye.'
I move into the direction of the signal and when I arrived I saw a purple light on the ground.
'TREASURE TIME BITCHES!'
I slowly approach the light and when I could finally make out its shape I nearly popped a blood vessel.
'SCREENY?'
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YEAH?
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'Do you see what I see?'
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A little demonic fairy on the ground who wears nearly no clothing and resembles what you would call a succubus?
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'That... was way more specific than what I knew... BUT YEAH'
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HERE WE GO BOYS!