Is that even a word?

What I'm going to do/have done! (Section)

Okay, did it. But I wanted to do a bit more, that's why the chapter ended a bit abruptly.

But as I said...this is really long section. So I couldn't complete it all today.

Still, I'm glad at least I got a good chunk of it done.

Things I wrote just for you (And the others here as well!...Section.)

Demon of inconvenience: "So, here's my plan, and how I got to it."

I followed the demon into waiting and silent hallways.

Demon of inconvenience: "While you and your dad were busy (being losers) I was taking a top-down view of our little town, as I suspected big things were going down. And I was right. As-"

With each step of my shoes, the stairs creaked in a way that reminded me of high-pitched nail biting.

Demon of inconvenience: "The forest is burning, but not by a flame that is still learning. No, it is by a fire that has evolved to its absolute state; A hell flame. This flame leaves no smoke, no ash, no remnant of the past. And it only stops burning when its target is no more. To do this it will spread anywhere it can, even to places a fire can't. Yes, be it the ocean floor, or a black-holes core, the hell flame will still burn. Do you understand then Susan? The utter futility of calling the fire department to deal with such a task? If you do, then you will know there is no point in playing hero. And I'm sure you understand that none of the adults will listen to such tall tales. No, they will blabber on and on and treat this fire like it's nothing but background jabber. This is another reason why killing Ms.Care is needed. For her death will force your father to go farther in Cafir to clear his name in the law's eye. And certainly, you agree that's a better fate than everyone burning alive, right?"

I moved onward, unsure how much farther I could keep my guts from spilling out.

Demon of inconvenience: "Exactly. So, the first task you must do for our plan to go smoothly is a simple one of navigation. It is to-"

I turned a corner, and found-

Demon of inconvenience: "Bring Carlo to his mother's tomb."

Carlo.

He was sitting at one of the many school cafeteria tables. He had an apple to his left and a pencil to his right. And despite looking so hard at the math questions below, I knew he wasn't thinking much of numbers at all.

I'm kinda an expert at that sorta stuff.

So with a deep breath and more than a bit of pep-talking, I managed to wobble my way to sitting next to Carlo.

...

No motion. Not even a fidget or acknowledgment of my existence. Which is the sort of ignorance one can only achieve when actively ignoring another.

Uhm, I'm a bit of an expert at cold shoulders as well.

And gee was it icy.

...

Susan: "I'm sorry."

No response.

Susan: "I didn't mean to hurt you, really. I didn't even know Ms.Care was your mom."

No response.

Susan: "a-And I know that doesn't make me saying all those bad things any better! But...I uhm...."

...It hurt a lot, you know?

Often people think screaming or punching is the worst response someone can give you. But I don't think that's true at all.

I think the worst thing to hear back from anyone in the whole wide world is...

Silence.

Because if someone yells at you, then that means they care. Maybe they only care to hurt you, but that's still a type of caring. Even if it's a cruel one.

But when people are silent they're ignoring you. They're telling you that they don't care, that you're not even worth considering.

...And then, what can you do? Whether you want to apologize or not doesn't even matter to them.

They'll just pack things up, leave home, and never call or send notes or ever talk to you again.

And you'll still be with that apology in your tiny little hands. And a big needle in your stupid and silly heart.

...

Susan: "uuu...Uu...uuuUuuUUUUUUAUUHH!"

I bear-hugged Carlo and wailed...fuck it, SOBBED like a little kid on his shoulders.

Carlo: "s-Susan! What are you-"

Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

Susan: "I'M SOOURYYY! i-I JUST WANTED TO LOOK COOL WITH MY MAGIC POWERS! PLEASE FORGIVEEE MEEE!!!"

Carlo: "Susan! Let go of me!"

Carlo tried wiggling away. I tightened my hug.

Susan: "nooOOO! I DON'T WANNA LET GO! I WANT TO KEEP DAD! AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO HATE ME! AND-"

Cruk!

Susan: "o-OOOW-"

I let go of Carlo to rub my stinging shoulder blade. He was quick on getting to his feet and chastizing me with his index finger.

Carlo: "This is exactly the problem with you Susan!

Susan: "t-t-the PROBLEM?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO BIT ME!"

Carlo: "B-Because YOU weren't respecting MY personal boundaries!"

Susan: "Boundaries? y-Your not a nation dumbass! You-"

Carlo: "Ughh!"

Carlo's face-palm was a sign so obvious that even I couldn't help but realize my current tact was failing me.

And so, I decided to risk it all by doing something really really REALLY hard.

Listen.

Susan: "...Okay...I'm sorry for hugging you when you didn't want me to and uh yeah. Sorry."

Carlo sighed, then looked at my right shoulder blade.

Carlo: "It's fine, we're even on that front anyway."

I nodded and pretended like I wasn't still pissed at getting chewed on.

Carlo: "...I'm sorry for ignoring you. I know that's not how adults solve things, I was just...really mad at you."

Susan: "It's okay, I get mad also. Normally when I'm hungry, and the thing about me Carlo? I'm always hungry."

I smiled in a way that I hoped conveyed the brilliant depth of my wit.

Carlo did not smile back.

And so I scurried for the most natural response to kill off the growing silence between us.

Susan: "I'm uh...sorry for the mean things I said. And for not saying sorry sooner. And like...everything I guess."

Carlo did not respond.

I bit my lips, then remembered the plan and forced myself to raise my sharp tongue to slay this awkward beast known as 'The silent pauses of the uhm...'

...

Susan: "Is...is saying sorry not enough? Do I need to do something for you? Like...like give one of my pigs?"

Carlo raised a brow.

Carlo: "You have pigs as pets?"

Susan: "What? No! I meant to eat!"

Carlo: "Susan I'm...I'm vegan."

Susan: "o-Oh..."

That explains why the chocolate bar he gave me was so damn bitter.

Susan: "Well...a kiss-"

Carlo: "EWW!"

...I decided to pretend he was being coy to save my ego from any more bruising.

Susan: "Okay! Then what the hell do you want!"

Carlo: "Nothing! Giving me presents isn't going to change the giant red flag you're waving around!"

I tilted my head.

Susan: "But...red is like...the coolest color. Why-"

I bit my lips shut as I noticed that Carlo was halfway to face-palming again.

Carlo: "How are you 12? Like, actually? Even 7 year old have more vocabulary than you!"

My face flushed, and I couldn't help but retort with a sensible counter.

Susan: "Give me a break! I've spent more time chasing pigs than talking to other kids! And if you haven't noticed, there are not a lot of big words you can get from pigs other than 'Oink oink' and 'Where is my food!' "

Carlo opened his mouth to disagree, then thought about it for a few long seconds...

He shrugged his shoulders.

Carlo: "Alright, break given."

See? I was being sensible.

Carlo: "But that doesn't change the issue, Susan!"

I crossed my arms, mostly to make sure I wouldn't punch Carlo for his incoming insult.

Susan: "And that would be?"

Carlo: "i-Isn't it obvious!? Your selfish!"

I rolled my eyes.

Susan: "My Dad is a farmer Carlo, not a fisherman. How would he even have any fish to sell-"

Carlo: "Okay no! You know what that means! I know you do! Everyone does!"

I tried not to smile.

Sadly, I'm not good at that.

Susan: "o-Okay, fine! I'm messing with you! But like come on! I was on my knees ready to do anything to make things right! Even if it meant giving you all those juicy pigs I have! That's like...t-the opposite of selfishness! It's like...unselfish!"

Carlo: "You mean...selfless?"

I shook my head.

Susan: "That's not a word, who'd want less of anything?"

Carlo: "Umh...death tolls? Costs? Fa-"

Susan: "I mean why would you make a word that's only positive if it means you get less of that something? It be like...if brave was called cowardless!"

Carlo: "I...I don't know Susan! It's just how the word works!"

Susan: "Well...I'm not adding that nonsense into my dictionary."

Carlo: "You...you know dictionary but not-Mmmh, w-whatever. That's not the point Susan. The point is that you're not apologizing because you felt like you've done something wrong! You're apologizing because it's convenient for you!"

My mouth gaped at how ridiculous this was. Didn't he see how hard I cried? How upset I got back at school when I hurt his feelings? How I'm trying to keep his mom safe from a terrible fate!?

Well...I guess it is mostly my dad...

But still!

Susan: "I'm not like that! Sure I admit I can be stubborn and too clever for my own good, But I am NOT heartless! How could I be? Witches are full of heart! Even the Slyverine!"

Carlo: "Not true! If you had any heart you wouldn't have said all those nasty things about my mom in the first place! Or at least talked things out sooner!"

Susan: "i-I was in a bad mood! And I didn't want to make things worse!"

Carlo: "Really? Because it sounds a lot more likely that you only started caring AFTER you knew you were in trouble!"

Susan: "n-Nuh-uh! I do care!"

Carlo: "Well...I don't believe you!"

Susan: "Okay, fine! I...uhm...."

Shit...what...what do you even do...

When someone doesn't believe in your apology?

...

The final section! (Section.)

What can anyone do when they've lost trust...

End this chapter maybe.