Frisk: "Really Alphys? I beat Undyne! Your toys are just-"
*You move through the lasers, suffering no damage.
Frisk: "Child's play."
*You dash forward, leaping across the gap between the two bridges. You continue to run as the bots chase after you. (For)
Alphys: "I-i'm only starting human! I-'ll show you the powers of monsters...mind! Laser mode, activate! Ngaah!"
*You hear groaning followed by muttered words.
Alphys: "oh that was so so lame."
*More pieces of your t-shirt are burnt off from the laser's heat.
Frisk: "Come on Alphys! At least let me keep my dignity!"
Alphys: "O-oh I-i'm so sorry! I-i mean these lasers should've killed-I-i mean I don't use them to ki-...W-well, I-i am using them to kill you but-"
*Alphys's bumbling was charming...minus the whole attempted murder.
Frisk: 'Eh, everyone's attempted to murder me at some point, even myself!'
*Another laser cuts a piece of your sleeves off.
Frisk: 'That being said...I don't want to leave here half naked.'
*You deflect the lasers with your empty gun. Then aim at the bot to-
*...?
Frisk: "What? C-come on? Where's my fight option?"
Alphys: "A-ahm! A fight begins if a monster or human carries ill intent toward each other. Or more precisely if a sentient creature wishes to battle, then a battle will commence. And uh, I didn't program these bots to have any sort of sentience sooooo-"
Frisk: "Oh whatever! I barely use that thing anyway! I-"
*You try to shoot at the bots...nothing happens.
Alphys: "A-ahm! Shopkeepers are unable to begin a battle or be harmed until they leave their shopkeep. You'd know this if you read the beginners guide to battle."
Frisk: "How the hell are these things shopkeepers?"
Bots: "Selling at 0 gold, lasers to the face! Laser to the face! Please buy now! Lasers to the face!"
Frisk: "THAT DOESN'T COUNT!"
Alphys: "A-ahm! You see, as long as one believes they're a shopkeeper, they CAN be a shopkeeper. These bots 110% believe that they're firing lasers at your face to drive up sales! Oh yes, capitalism is-"
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Frisk: "Mettaton Copyrighted that."
Alphys: "S-shit."
Frisk: "And your imitation sucked."
Alphys: "yeah I've never had the-W-wait what am I saying? A-ahm! Not so tough now a-are you human!"
Frisk: "Whatever! Your laser balls are overrated."
*You prove this by back-flipping over multiple lasers...and then face-planting on the floor. You proceed to get lasered in every which way before dashing ahead.
*...Not that acrobatic?
Frisk: 'Shut up.'
*Just be careful, if you die we'll need to do all this over and-
Frisk: 'And kill the monsters again, I got it! But trust me Chara,"
*You deflect another laser.
Frisk: 'We're in no danger.'
Alphys: "G-getting real quiet over their human. It's just like Mew Mew's Dad said, those who talk big are the first to become small once-"
Frisk: "great threats appear! I know, you made me watch that show like...20 times."
Alphys: "I-i don't even know you!...Mew mew kissy cutie 1 or-"
Frisk: "I prefer the manga."
Alphys: "Ugh! I knew it! Everyone I know who says that has no heart...mostly because they're skeletons."
*Is this really the time?!
Frisk: 'Fine, I'll finish this.'
*You raise up your cowboy hat.
Frisk: "Hey bots, I'm selling this, free of charge!"
*You toss the cowboy hat to the bots and-
Bot 1: "Mine."
Bot 2: "Mine."
Bot 3: "Mine."
Bot 4: "Mine."
Every fucking Bot: "MINE!"
*They smash into each other.
Alphys: "Ah...well they can-"
*Then blow up.
Alphys: "...Fuck."
Frisk: "Hahaha! You never could work out those kinks Dino Girl!"
Alphys: "Shut up! You have no clue how hard it is to make shopkeeper bots...and NOT make them sentient!"
Frisk: "What's your problem with sentient bots again?"
Alphys: "Everything! You need to pay them wages and Bot medicare and most of them don't even end up believing their shopkeepers Bots! And-"
Frisk: "Then you have the inevitable housing crisis."
Alphys: "Exactly! W-wait! No no no, Alphys, what are you doing? You're bonding with a murderer!"
Frisk: "Well if a murder can be a friend are-"
Alphys: "No! I'm not going to be talked no mewmewed by the person who killed all my friends! This is over!"
Frisk: "Alphys!...Come on, don't you want to bond about how GREAT Mew Mew kissy cutie 2 is?"
*...No response.
Frisk: ‘She must’ve muted… that line always manages to make her rant for a good hour.’
*...When did you figure out how to deal with the bots?
Frisk: 'Oh, I always knew. Alphys is just one of my favorites so I wanted to play around with her. But now-'
*...The core trembles...something big is coming.
Frisk: '...So it's mutual...'
*You quicken up your pace.
Frisk: 'Play time's over for the both of us.' (you)